Weakling Blood
by Zentauria
Summary: The Avatar is the last Air Nomad, that much is true. But the last airbender? Before the war, Air Nomads traveled everywhere, and some founded families with people from all around the world, passing down their bending abilities. I'm one of those unlucky bastards with mixed ancestry, and the skill broke through in me. My problem? I'm Fire Nation. [on hiatus for revamping]
1. Airbender, Firebender

**Hello to all my fellow Avatar fans out there!**

 **So, I'm not really new on FanFiction, but new at this particular fandom and hope to get a foot on the ground here, although the concept of an airbender OC is a bit overused... But at least I have a non-superpower explanation for how it could happen and what kind of consequences it might have. Enjoy!**

* * *

"Kaaamiiii!"

I wince and the leaves I just practiced with flutter to the ground. I turn around to face my brother Mizulon, unmistakably named after Firelord Azulon, the father of our current Firelord. It's a waaay to impressive name for a ten-year-old, though.

"Mimi!" I call out in shock, then I manage to relax a bit. If it's him, it's okay. My parents would have been alright, too, sorta. They'd ground me and done. But anyone else catch me doing my stuff and I'm doomed.

"Are you doing these hideous things again?" Mimi asks and I wish he wouldn't have picked up that word. Hideous. It was unavoidable, though. Everyone calls my abilities hideous, or even worse things. At least everyone who knows of them, including myself. We don't assign much value to my skills, quite the opposite actually. Well, you can't even say 'skills', more like raw power waiting to be honed. Well, it can wait forever. I'm forbidden to practice, I wouldn't want to, either, but I can't help succumbing to the temptation of this savagery from time to time. Besides, I don't even know whom to practice with. I don't know how many people like me are out there, and those who exist are not going to make it public, understandably. But I know it's a rare ability I have. Very rare, _deservedly_ rare, and the only known master of this practice is an enemy of the state. Well, and he's dead.

Sighing, I get up from my squatting position and straighten my robes. "I told you, I can't help it! It's a part of who I am, whether I like it or not. If dad told you to stop firebending, would you manage?"

Mimi turns away, face crunched up in a sort of special pout unique to him. He's really cute, my little brother, with that round face and big chocolate eyes of his. His black hair is tied in a topknot, as usual for a Fire Nation citizen. He looks a lot like mum, they say, while I may as well be from a whole different family. My hair is black alright, but slightly wavy, curling up at the tips, and my eyes are a dark shade of gray. I prefer wearing my hair in a braid rather than a topknot, so the waviness wouldn't show, but my eyes... Well, they just refuse to fit in with the brown-eyed members of my family. And let's not get started on my darker complexion...

"It's not fair!" Mimi declares. "It's not your fault that our great-great-grandmother married one of those filthy Air Nomads! You should be a firebender like me, not stuck with... that!"

He gestures to the leaves rustling in the evening breeze.

"It's called _airbending_!" I drawl, a bit annoyed with my brother. While I admit that I'd rather be a firebender, or even a non-bender like mum, I don't like people treating my abilities as something unbelievably obscene. It's like treating _me_ as something unbelievably obscene, and the only person allowed to do that is _myself_. "What are you doing here, anyway? I thought you were going for a sleepover at Hirai's place?"

"Hirai is sick," Mimi explains, arms crossed in front of his chest. "I can't stay there." He seems a little offended by the fact, and I can't suppress a giggle.

"I don't think he chose to be sick today. I'm sure he wants you over as much as you do!"

"I suppose..." Mimi mumbles and his arms drop to his sides. "Well, anyway, mum sent me to fetch you for dinner. Dad will be home any time now!"

"It's dinnertime already?" I ask a bit bemusedly. "I never would have guessed..."

Time flies when I practice control over my bending in the backyard, so I'll someday stop sending things flying with a mere sneeze. I noticed that already. Still, it surprises me time and time again.

"Let's get inside, I'm hungry!" Mimi grabs my wrist and pulls me to the house. I laugh softly and yank free. "I'm perfectly capable of walking on my own, you know?"

Satisfied that he fulfilled his mission, Mimi parades through the curtain separating the interior from the back porch and the small garden. Inside, my mum is preparing the table for dinner, serving a huge pot of rice. The smell of fried vegetables and roasted hippocow wafts through the air, making my stomach grumble agreement.

"Take care not to drool, Kami," my mother Jimari jokes. She is a beautiful woman with glossy black hair tied up in a bun, flawless white skin, a small nose and eyes the color of cocoahazel. Even married and with two children, men are flocking her. They don't know she gave birth to a filthy airbender, that her bloodline is marred by the weak. My father didn't know, too, until I was born. But love is brightest in the dark, as everyone knows. Their relationship is none the worse for it, and we're all glad. Like Mimi said, it's not my fault I'm an airbender, and it's not my mum's fault, either.

However, for now, there is something else to make clear.

"Muu-uum! I'm not drooling!" I complain, waving my arms in protest. My brother chuckles.

"But you look like you do!" he joins in, making me growl with frustration.

"MIMI! Stop backstabbing your big sister!"

At that, he just grins at me and sits down at the table. "When is dad coming?"

As if just waiting for the question, I can hear the front door open. Not seated yet, I rush to the entrance and hug him tightly.

"Welcome home, dad!"

"Hello, Kami," he responds with that deep, velvety voice I love so much. Maybe I'm biased, but he is the best storyteller this world has to offer. His talents are wasted as a prison guard, but that's how it is. We're at war, a war which rages for a hundred years already. "Stormy as ever, I see," he teases, deliberately using a word associated with air. He's quite a stick-in-the-mud in his own right, but he makes his efforts. Using airy phrases is his way of showing that he doesn't mind me being an airbender. Could have fooled me. I don't blame him, though...

I let go of him. "Dinner is ready. You better hurry, or Mimi is gonna eat your share!"

"She's right, dear." My mum shows up in the door frame leading from the hallway to the dining room. She greets her husband (his name's Lin Yi by the way) with a peck on his lips and helps him take off unnecessary parts of his uniform.

My dad isn't exactly handsome. While his short hair is nice enough, his eyes are of an uncanny light brown color and his nose is crooked from having it broken by a rebellious prisoner a few years ago. But he's elegant and well-mannered, and my mum, for all her beauty, is by no means a superficial person. She knows how to truly appreciate someone, and I wouldn't want any other woman for my mother, even though she's an Air Nomad's descendant and passed his curse down to me. My family is totally worth it.

Without further interruptions, the three of us sit down (Mimi didn't bother getting up) and dig in. I can't say mum is a splendid cook, that's more like my field of expertise. And least I'm told that; personally, I'd say I'm somewhat overspecialized. I know only a few recipes, but they seem to be well-received if it comes as far as my mum allowing me, a fourteen-year-old, to handle the cooking fire. Unlike my brother and father, I have no natural defenses against the flames. Anyway, my mum made dinner, and both my brother and me steer clear of some of the vegetables. They're traditionally overcooked.

"Don't you want some of the sliced tomatocarrots?" my father prompts. "They're delicious."

I share a look with my brother and shake my head. "We're good on vegetables."

He shrugs and pointedly grabs another slice with his chopsticks. "You have no idea what you're missing out on."

My mother glows with pride. She thinks us children just don't know what's good. The truth is, my father even eats ocean kumquats, a so called 'Water Tribe delicacy'. After that, I decided I'm never ever gonna touch Water Tribe food.

"So, how was school?"

Of course, my brother immediately shoots off a string of praise hymns. His school days always seem exciting and fun, he has many friends to play with and subject matters aren't too hard for him.

I block out his rambling and search my mind for something nice to say. I hate school, there is no place in this world I wish so hard to set on fire. I don't have any friends to speak of, my classmates are too scared of the class bully. Who has singled me out as his personal punching bag, which pretty much means _waking nightmare_. It means name-calling, loneliness, and working double-time on the homework. Mine and his. He's smart, too. If he is in a bad mood or I don't deliver his homework correctly and punctually, he'd beat me up, but in ways it looks like I'm just being clumsy.

There was that one day some anonymous note appeared in my school bag, advising me to change schools, so I can be safe from him. I was thankful to know that there are still people caring about me, even though they don't do it openly. But I can't take the advice. The only other schools around are private schools and too expensive to attend.

"Kami?" a voice finds its way to my ears. "Kami!"

"Yes?" I hastily reply and look up from my food.

"You're spacing out," my mum notes. "Are you alright?"

I shrug, trying to look nonchalant. "Sure. Just thinking about school. We wrote poems in arts today, it was fun. I tried composing a haiku about plum blossoms, now that was something different!"

I manage to say it with some real enthusiasm. Writing poems _is_ fun. I'm not particularly good at it, though. While I like playing with words, doing it in an artful way is not exactly my strong suit.

"Can I go to my room now? I have a lot of homework to do."

"Of course, sweetheart," my mum permits. "Don't worry about the plates, I'll clear the table."

"Thank you."

My room is actually the attic, and it has a window giving an amazing view of the sky right above my bed. I don't know if it is because I'm an airbender, but I've always felt a strong connection to the vast blueness up there. I sleep best when I can see the stars.

But the stars aren't going to help me getting a grip on my life, even if they were out right now. Heaving a deep sigh, I slump into my desk chair and rummage through my school bag, searching for my textbooks.

Thank the High Dragons it's nothing major today. Just some mathematics and drawing a time bar about Firelord Sozin's greatest victories. Of course, his biggest accomplishment is wiping out the Air Nomads, emptying the Air Temples and tracking down every single Air Nomad who escaped. A great accomplishment indeed. And yet the Avatar somehow slipped through his fingers, but that's okay. Prince Zuko killed him in Ba Sing Se, got rid of the only obstacle standing in the way of victory. And then, perhaps the rest of my family will finally come home, my uncle, my aunt, my cousin, my grandfather... all the people fighting for our homeland. It would be so great to see them again! Especially my cousin Tovi. He's a mechanic, he'd always build little toys and play with me and my brother, crack jokes and just be fun personified. I miss him. When I think about him, I'm always afraid he won't come back, that he would be killed in the Earth Kingdom, far away from home... It's a sacrifice we have to make, and be proud of it. But really? I'm just scared. I fear the day I will join the army. I hope I'll grow out of it.

I scribble down some last notes, taking care that my two time bars look nothing alike, seeing how one of them isn't officially mine. Once I'm finally finished, I drop everything into my satchel and sprawl on my bed, already loathing the morning to come. Just another day of hiding and avoiding being dissed and pushed around, just another day of loneliness, just another day full of uncried tears, just another day waiting for someone with the strength to make a difference. Waiting for someone who never comes...

* * *

 **Not exactly long... I usually write 3-4k chapters, 2k is weird on me... But I like this closing phrase, so the closing phrase it shall be.**

 **I don't expect much chapters on this one, but I never do, so it might turn into something real long, or it may not. Writing Fire Nation children is pretty hard, we don't know much about them. So my foremost source is The Headband episode, for all it's worth. Well, and history books. Propaganda is actually quite a topic around my country. Especially how it's best avoided... But I'm digressing.**

 **Leave a review, if you don't mind. Or fav and/or follow, I'd like that, too. ^-^  
Hope you enjoyed!**


	2. A New Student

**I'm highly motivated! Next chapter already! Dunno about next week though, not sure about Internet connection. But motivation, oh the motivation!**

 **I didn't do a disclaimer last chapter, I noticed. But I guess it's self-evident I don't own anything about the Avatarverse. Just my little extensions here~**

* * *

Sometimes, I wonder what would happen if I just turn around on my heel and go. Apart from being dragged back to school by some guards, that is. Maybe I should pack spare clothes instead of school books and have a nice tour around town. Not that I'd do that. Call me a dweeb, but that's how it is. You can say I'm physically incapable of skipping school, too afraid of the consequences.

I enter the classroom, the grip on the sling of my satchel tighter than tight, hoping against hope that my personal tormentor isn't there yet.

"Good morning, Kamina!"

Of course he is. His voice is as pleasant as his face, a mask he wears for the teachers. But the students know better than trusting that fake smile.

"Good morning, Hide!" I play along, forcing the words out of my throat. He puts an arm around me, usually an intimate gesture, but coming from him, it just makes me tense up, feel caged.

It's a pretty recent habit of his, and I'm yet to get used to it. I let him lead me out of the classroom, out of the protective sight of teachers. He makes some small talk, I don't listen, too busy praying to get out of this unscathed. In a quiet corner devoid of other students, Hide finally releases me, but not without making sure I'm backed up against the wall, without a chance of escape. Not that I'd try, but he likes to emphasize his point.

"I hope you have my notebook with you, little airhead, or else..."

Smirking, he hits the palm of his hand with a fist, the smacking sound bringing up some very painful memories. Hide isn't just a close combat bully, but a firebender, too. And I've seen him use it. Not on me, luckily. But that can change any minute.

"I have it!" I tell him hastily, and I hate myself for every single word. I want to tell him that his puns are terrible. I want to stand up to him, show him that he has no right to treat me the way he does, and that I won't have it any longer. I want to yell at him, so badly. But I don't. Instead, I hand him his notebook without losing another word.

"Thank you." He finally steps back, still smirking. "Now get back to class, I have a girlfriend to tell hello."

I bow and take to my heels. With some safety distance between him and me, I heave a sigh of relief. But soon enough, the anger smoldering in my stomach makes its presence known once again, a burning desire to punch the living daylights out of that horrible guy. But for now, the wall will have to do. Hide is untouchable, the chairman's favorite. He can beat everyone up, but if someone else goes ahead and tries, they are sure to be send to the coal mines for some bitter physical labor supposed to better their behavior. Haha.

I really have no idea how On Ji, Hide's alleged girlfriend, can actually stand him. I guess she's terrified, too. But at least she doesn't need to share a classroom with him, being one grade junior.

I return to said classroom and drop into my seat cushion to unpack. Quill, notebook, textbook. At least Hide doesn't steal my stuff, he isn't _that_ petty. Thing is, I'd rather have him be petty and stupid than less petty and less stupid. 'Cause stupid bullies tend to get caught.

Tapping my fingertips at my desk, I watch the other kids chatting and laughing together like normal kids do. Myself, I don't even try to strike up a conversation. It would just end badly. Hide returns, the rest of the class files into the classroom, coming in dribs and drabs, until it's time to begin. We stand up, pay respect to our teacher and then turn around to the picture of Firelord Ozai in the back of the room. Reciting the Fire Nation oath is a mechanical thing, done over and over again until it's etched into your brain and you stop thinking about it. It just comes naturally.

Then the day starts, the first lessons passing by uneventfully. During fifth class, however, there is a commotion in the hallway. Mrs. Shen, our mathematics teacher, tells us to ignore it, which is what most of us do anyway. During break time, a boy named Yuro and some of his friends leave the classroom. When they come back, they explain that there is a new student in the neighboring class, and that his name is Kuzon. Poor guy has such an old-fashioned name... I wonder where his parents got it from, the Ultimate Book of Schmaltziness? Of course, Hide thinks it hilarious. Or more like ridiculous. Good thing we can agree on that, even if I don't like him. I pity Kuzon already, I'll be darned if the guy won't know the taste of Hide's fists by the end of the day.

It's lucky for me, though. When lessons are over, I can slip out of the room unnoticed by Hide, which means no double homework for me today.

It's quite a picture actually, the scene in the schoolyard. Kuzon sticks out like a sore thumb, as for some reason, he's wearing the belt of the school uniform as a headband and gets away with it. Even the school's logo is upside down, it looks a bit like an arrow pointing at his nose.

He's cheerily talking to On Ji. I try to get a bit nearer, curiosity piqued. As long as I make sure to stay hidden among the crowd, I'll be fine.

Sure as rain, Hide shows up and spots Kuzon chatting with his On Ji. That he's getting jealous is not much of a surprise, but then the unbelievable happens – Kuzon, obviously too naive for his own good, greets Hide politely, a big grin on his face. And Hide leaves him be! Without beating him up and without setting his hair on fire! Amazing!

Feeling I've seen enough, I quickly make my way home before Hide might sniff me out after all, and probably not just load his homework upon me, but On Ji's as well. I know the girl is a nice enough person, but who knows what she'll do under Hide's watching eyes?

* * *

This afternoon, I resist the urge to practice my airbending and change clothes to take a walk into town, just celebrating the fact that I made it through the day without Hide hitting or insulting me too much. Maybe I also celebrate the fact that he's found a new punching bag. I feel a bit bad about feeling good about it, but if Kuzon's presence means that I will get a rest... Well, good for me, right? And it's not like I can change it, Hide chooses his victims, not me.

I slap my temple, trying hard to shoo those ruthless thoughts out of my brain. Kuzon doesn't deserve the treatment Hide is likely to give him. Not at all.

I don't realize I've been practically traipsing into someone before actually knocking said someone over. But at least my reflexes are quick and I manage to catch the pot that the person has been holding. It's pretty heavy, obviously made of some kind of earth and filled to the brim with foodstuffs.

"Sorry!" I apologize hastily. The person I knocked over is a girl around my age, with a good tan, fluffy brown hair and blue eyes. She's not from around here, that much I can tell. "I didn't watch where I was going."

The girl smiles soothingly. "It's okay," she assures and gets up to dust off her clothes. I notice how pretty she is. Not the same way my mum is pretty, but I do imagine that she's quite a men magnet.

"Can I do something for you? You know, because I knocked you over?" I offer, remembering my manners. "I can help you carry this if you want."

"Thank you, but I'll be fine. May I have my jar back, please?"

"Uh, sure..."

I hand the girl her purchases, a bit reluctant to let her go. There is something exotic about her, something which makes me think she could be a good friend to an exotic Fire Nation airbender like me, and before I know it, I'm walking next to her.

"I'm Kamina, by the way, but most people call me Kami."

"Nice to meet you, Kami. I'm Ka...ri."

Huh? Did she hesitate at the name or am I imagining things?

"So we have similar names! Funny, isn't it?"

Kari laughs at that. "Yes, it's funny." She smiles, and I smile back. Such a nice day indeed!

"So, where are you from? You don't look like typical Fire Nation folk."

"Neither do you."

I turn away, wanting to slap myself. What am I thinking, trying to bond with a random girl in the marketplace? Of course she'd notice my looks!

"I'm sorry, I didn't know it was a sore spot."

"It's okay, I should have expected it." I kick a pebble lying on the ground. "Mixed ancestry," I explain tersely, mentally preparing to leave. If not even a colonial wants to have anything to do with me, how will I ever find a friend?

But Kari surprises me. "That's amazing!"

I look up, frowning. Kari is a bit taller than me, but I can see in her eyes that she means it. "You sure?"

"Of course! I like the idea of mixed couples." She pauses to smile again. "And I think you're really pretty."

My face heats up at the compliment. I'll be a turtleduck if I don't blush madly right now! "Thank you. You're pretty, too."

"Thanks."

We keep chattering about this and that, mostly cooking. Kari apparently enjoys preparing food as much as I do. Well, at least she does it a lot. I tell her about my younger brother, and she tells me she has an older one. It's pretty fascinating to compare younger and older brothers, and we laugh a lot. Apparently, older brothers are idiots.

I feel comfortable with the brunette girl, she seems to be a gentle person. I wish I would have met her a bit earlier in my life, or that she were at my school. Although, actually, no. If she were, she'd be under Hide's thump like everyone else, and she wouldn't talk to me. I wonder how many kids like Kari are among the students of my school. Could I find them if I just had the courage to stand up to Hide?

We are just discussing some spices when Kari suddenly turns to inspect our surroundings. I do so as well, if just for a reflex. We've left the market and we're in the suburbs now, near the city's borders. A bit further and you get to the cliff side with its rocky shore.

"So, you're living around here?"

I'm impressed. Those houses look rather expensive, pure white and sturdily built.

"Yes," Kari replies curtly. She seems a bit more frantic than before. "Kami, I'm sorry, but we have to separate here."

"That's okay, Kari," I assure her. The way she said that... she must have picked up on my insecurities. "Thanks for talking to me. I liked that."

"My pleasure. Make sure to get home safely!"

"You, too!"

When I turn around, it's more of a skipping than a walk home. This must have been one of the best days in my life, and I'm going to treasure it forever and ever!

* * *

 **I wonder if Hide feels exaggerated? Not to me anyway, I've seen that type before. But still, I'm a bit worried. There isn't all that much known about him.**

 **Anyway, hope I entertained you guys! And who noticed the little shout-out to a certain Canadian animated kid's show? (No one, I guess, it's not exactly as well known as Avatar. Hint: It remains unfinished with 26 episodes and one of the main characters is a book.)**


	3. Colonials and Residents

**So, there you go! There was no Internet connection to have indeed, but I don't need it to write. ^-^  
There are a lot of chapters incoming, at least after I double-checked them. There is something I feel that it needs to be done, I just can't put my finger on it yet...**

 **Anyway, third chapter for now! Have fun!**

* * *

Back home, Mimi and mum are waiting for me already. Mum has made some tea and set up a game of Pai Sho. I know the rules, she knows the rules, and together, we're trying to teach them to Mimi, but my little brother isn't exactly interested. He's bored by it, and I believe him. He's just too energetic to sit down and push around Pai Sho tiles.

Which is why I end up playing against my mum while Mimi practices his firebending in the yard. I like the game, you need brains to play it, not brawns. Maybe, if I challenge Hide to a game of Pai Sho...?

"Haha, I won!" I state smugly, pushing one of my tiles forward and raising my arms cheerily. My mum smiles mildly.

"Nice move, sweetie. You're in such a good mood today, did something happen?"

My arms fall down immediately and I start twiddling my fingers, betraying fluttering nerves. My mum is not going to approve.

"Well, I sorta met that colonial girl at the market. She was very nice and I only talked to her for a short time, but... it made me really happy, you know? I think she could be an amazing friend."

Mum sighs. "Listen, Kami, I know it's not easy for you, but you shouldn't talk to the colonials. They are a bad influence. They..."

"I know, I know..." I cut her off surly. "They are thieves and beggars, and if they aren't, they are snobbish and lazy, and they poison the love we feel for our country. But mum, that's the point!" I pull at the skin beneath my eyes to emphasize their color. "I _look_ like a colonial! What do you think how many people actually find me worth talking to? At least Kari didn't judge me by my face!"

"You were with a colonial?" my brother suddenly materializes next to the Pai Sho board. When did he enter the house? I don't have much time to wonder, because Mimi continues, "What if she led you into an ambush and robbed you?"

"Rob me of what?" I sigh exasperatedly. "My braid?"

"I don't know. But I know you can't trust those colonials. Maybe she's waiting for you to take your pocket money with you when you meet her!"

I run a hand through my hair, loosing some strands in the process. A part of me wants to believe in Kari, but what if Mimi is right? What if she's just taking advantage of my insecurities, like Hide does?

"Fine. I'll avoid her if I see her again."

"That's what I like to hear," my mum says proudly, reaching out to ruffle my hair. I'm not exactly sure whether I like it. It makes me feel all warm on the inside, causing me to giggle like a little girl, and that's both nice and embarrassing at the same time. And all the while my brother is beaming like the sun itself, probably happy to have prevented his big sis from doing something incredibly stupid.

They're right. Colonials cannot be trusted. But family can.

"I love you guys," I suddenly feel the urge to say. I wouldn't have thought that Mimi's smile can still broaden.

"We love you, too!" he proclaims, my mum not saying anything at all. She doesn't have to. Her own smile says everything. It makes me feel all fuzzy on the inside, at least for a moment. As soon as I snap out of it, I rub my hands, preparing for _evil_.

"So, who wants a loving butt-kick at Pai Sho?"

"I think you do, sweetie," my mum retorts. And that's a challenge!

* * *

I can't sleep during the night. I'm lying on my back, staring out the window at the stars above. I keep thinking about my current situation. About Hide, about Kuzon and Kari.

Even though I try my hardest to forget the colonial girl, she keeps drifting through my mind. In the dark silence of the night, it's hard to keep track of my thoughts and I wonder how much is true about the way everyone talks about colonials. She was nice. She didn't try to keep me around, that was my initiative. So gaining my trust couldn't have been her motive, right?

Unless she knew I'd stick around. I'm told I'm relatively easy to read, and then she could have used reverse psychology on me. Or maybe she really was just being nice because she is. Am I overthinking things? My brain ties itself up in a big knot just trying to make sense of everything.

And then, of course, Hide and Kuzon. There is something about Kuzon's behavior... I can't put my finger on it, but Hide is the kind of person you automatically shy away from. Kuzon just seemed completely oblivious. Maybe he is too dumb to live. Or maybe he's a teacher's pet as well? It would be an explanation how he can keep his belt headband on. Brr, what a disgusting thought! One of them is definitely enough!

Hmm, Hide is probably going to beat me up tomorrow, because I didn't wait for him and receive his homework. Great.

Again, I wish I were stronger. I wish I were a firebender. Instead, I'm a wimpy airbender, predestined to be dominated by those born to the fire. What did I do to deserve it?

 _What did I do?_

* * *

"KAMI! WAKE UP!"

I jerk up and spot my brother standing at my bed.

"Mimi!" I gasp. After the initial shock is overcome, I notice he's already fully clothed and his school bag is slung over his shoulder, causing the shock to return full force. "Don't tell me I've slept in?"

"You did. Mum's wondering what's holding you up. I can't believe you're still asleep!"

Mind switched off by rising panic, I propel myself up with my arms. Turning around in mid-air, I smoothly land on both feet next to my bed and take off to my dresser.

"Hey, Kami! Calm down!" my brother calls me to order. "It's not so urgent that you have to resort to means so far beneath you!"

"What are talking about?" I ask, wondering if he could mean the vicious way I rip fresh clothing out of the drawers. Probably not? Wait... "I just used airbending, right?" I ask the question for which I actually don't need an answer. "To get out of bed."

"Well, I've certainly never seen anyone else just jumping up from a sitting position by using their arms. Normal people use their legs for that."

I roll my eyes and growl, "Yeah, and I'm not normal. Just keep rubbing it in!"

There is a short pause and I turn to face Mimi. He looks hurt.

"I'm sorry," he says, while I'm already feeling guilty for yelling at him.

"Me too."

"Don't be. Now hurry up, mum's waiting!"

"Okay." I hastily grab fresh underwear and my school uniform, then I rush to the bathroom for morning routine. My mum, thinking ahead, has assembled some vegetables and meat on two small wooden skewers for me to eat on the road. The vegetables aren't even overcooked for once and don't crumble to pieces. Hurray!

I gulp down the food and throw the skewers into the next trash can. My stomach doesn't like eating and running at the same time, but I don't have much of a choice. Can't afford being late!

It's a close call, but I'm on time to throw down my satchel and pant the Fire Nation oath together with my classmates. Once finished, I remain standing while the others sit down, so I can bow to Mr. Gao and apologize for missing out on it. Luckily, Mr. Gao is somewhat relaxed in that way and dismisses the whole thing as a one-time slip-up. After all, I'm usually in school ten minutes before the lessons start.

We have biology and history and in between, I make a point of apologizing to Mr. Gao again. Mostly because it's an excuse to hang around him during break time and be safe from Hide. I'm dreading the break between the second and third period, though, since the students are send out the yard for this one. And no teacher in the hallway. I try sneaking out with the crowd. Sometimes, it works.

Today is not one of those times. A hand is placed on my shoulder, causing me to freeze up. "Where do you think you're going, airhead?"

The kids who notice send me pitiful glances, before turning away and pretend they didn't see anything, lest they be next. A pang of anger rushes through my veins, but it's quickly snuffed out. I wouldn't behave any other way.

Well, here goes nothing. I face Hide, trying to look braver than I actually am. And failing miserably. I hunch my shoulders and hang my head low, staring at my shoes. This is humiliating!

"Looking ashamed now, huh?" Hide sneers. Out of the corner of my eyes, I detect a fist coming from the left and automatically raise an arm to deflect it. A mistake. The blow is just a faint, intended to direct my focus away from my feet, which are promptly swept from under me. I barely manage to keep my airbending from activating itself and cushion the fall, so my rear crashes to the ground painfully. Revealing that curse to Hide would be just the thing to perfect my misery. And it's bad enough as it is.

I look up fearfully. Hide raises a hand, palm up. A little flame springs to life and a gasp escapes my lips. The corners of Hide's mouth lift into a smug smile.

"You're lucky that I have a colonial to take care of. I won't be this kind the next time you try to give me the slip," the tall boy threatens. I can only nod, my eyes glued to the flame. So destructive and yet so beautiful. It keeps me from thinking straight, all I know is that I really really don't want it to lick at my uniform. Or anywhere, actually. That flicker of light promises a world of hurt far exceeding anything I've been through yet.

Suddenly, Hide closes his fist, essentially quenching the fire. Without wasting another word, he strides out of the classroom, leaving me in a wheezing, trembling heap.

 _Don't cry, Kami!_ , I tell myself over and over again. _Don't cry!_

* * *

 **Uhm, so much for that. I don't really like describing this kind of scene from a first person POV. Fear usually switches the brain off, which makes a realistic depiction hard. I tip my hat at anyone who manages. u.u**

 **Well, hope you enjoyed anyway~**


	4. The Art of Dodging

**Okay, double-checked and triple-checked, and off we go! Last one for now, though. I need sleeeeeeep!**

* * *

Once I've calmed down enough to think clearly, I realize what's happening here. When Hide mentioned a colonial to take care of, he was probably talking about Kuzon. I didn't even know Kuzon is a colonial, I didn't get that good a look at him. But it may explain his old-fashioned name. If his parents are Earth Kingdom, they probably can't tell ancient names and contemporary ones apart.

I pick myself up. Teachers don't take kindly to students straying through the building during yard break. I rush outside, and when I see the students gathering in some kind of circle, I know I'm missing out on something. People don't gather like this to watch Hide beating someone up, even if that someone happens to be a new student. Not so many of them, anyway.

I slip through the crowd until I catch sight of Kuzon and Hide. There is a scorch mark on the ground, which means that bully firebent at Kuzon. But mysteriously enough, the colonial seems uninjured.

Hide starts at the boy, trying to knock him to the ground. And then, the next Kuzon-related unbelievability happens – the boy sidesteps Hide. I watch in awe as Kuzon, amazingly light on his feet, dodges Hide and just keeps going, hands folded behind his back, without even breaking a sweat.

Hide, with increasing fury, swats and swipes at Kuzon without even grazing him. Heck, Kuzon _unbalances_ him at one point, grinning all the while like this kind of engagement is some funny sort of crazy mid-day gymnastics.

I feel the urge to cheer him on. I've never seen such an enjoyable fight – because it's Hide being at the receiving end for a change, even though there is barely any physical contact. But I keep my mouth shut. I know Hide is going to win this in the end... somehow. Kuzon's movements are amazing, but... alright, here it comes! Trouble for Kuzon, served by the headmaster.

Hide, by the time too upset to look where he's going, trips over his own two feet, landing basically in front of the big boss. Some fake tears do the rest, the headmaster finds his star pupil sniffing on the ground, with a thoroughly confused Kuzon standing over him. At least I think so, I can't see that well from my position.

"Picking fights on your second day?" the headmaster asks coldly and one of Kuzon's classmates steps up. For a moment there, I believe he's actually going to defend Kuzon and clear things up. But I should have known better, the headmaster continues uninterruptedly, "We need to have a conference to discuss your punishment. Bring your parents to my office after school."

"Parents? But..." Kuzon's obviously trying to say something important. Not that the headmaster cares, it's about _Hide_ after all.

"Don't be late!"

And with that, the headmaster strolls off, a smug Hide trailing him, probably to get his injuries treated. The injuries from not hitting Kuzon.

The students disperse into smaller groups, whispering among themselves. It seems that the feat of not getting beaten up by Hide isn't the only oddity Kuzon has pulled in his two days. Apparently, he's also contradicted the history books, but the content of the contradiction has been distorted by word of mouth. It varies, some say Kuzon claimed the Siege of Ba Sing Se never happened, then there are those discussing Sozin's comet and some actually say Kuzon noted that the Air Nomads didn't have a military. One thing more ridiculous than the next. Well, and then there is that thing about the guy dancing during music lesson, that he has no manners whatsoever and is basically the open-mouth-insert-foot-kind of character. But hey, he's a colonial, what exactly did people expect? That he's civilized?

I still want to hug him, though, just because he's shown Hide. It makes the kid infinitely sympathetic. Which is why I screw up all my courage and approach him.

I don't really like the look in his eyes, he seems just about to jump someone, like a cornered viperrat. Nasty beasts, they are.

"Uhm, hi!" I try saying anyway. He may be a colonial, but he can't be worse than Hide, right? It also helps that I'm taller than Kuzon.

The haunted look disappears faster than I can call my name and a grin splits Kuzon's face. "Hi!" He seems to recognize me as a senior, because he bows. It's a start. "I'm Kuzon!"

"So I'm hearing. You're stirring up quite a ruckus."

"Yeah, I've noticed," he chuckles awkwardly and rubs the back of his neck. He's cute, actually. Oh for the love of... My mum's going to kill me if she finds out I'm bonding with a colonial _again_. It also reminds me that I shouldn't put too much trust into Kuzon. "I'm sorry about that, this place is just so different from what I'm used to! So, what's your name?"

"My name is Kamina. And I want to tell you that I really liked how you managed to evade Hide. He terrorizes the whole school, he deserved being outdone by someone else."

Kuzon raises an eyebrow. "I'm not sure. I mean, I guess the students are better off without him, but I don't think getting violent is the answer."

I realize Kuzon's words only from the fringes of my perception, I've found something a lot more interesting – his eyes. At first, I thought it was a trick of the light, but his eyes are dark gray, just like mine.

"Uhm..." Kuzon drawls. "Is there something stuck to my face?"

I gesture wildly, trying to wave it off. Getting caught staring is a bit awkward, colonial or not. "No, no! I just thought... never mind." I wonder if he'd view it as an insult if I tell him that he looks like an Air Nomad. He may have mixed ancestry, too, and I really don't want him to get involved. He may start asking questions. "I just wondered if you can teach me to move like that," I add in an afterthought. It's a streak of genius, actually, if I do say so myself. It would be so helpful to be able to sidestep Hide's punches, helpful doesn't even cut it!

Now Kuzon _really_ looks insecure. "I'd love to, but... I don't think you'd want me as a teacher."

"Why not?" He's right, of course. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't ask a colonial to teach me anything. Colonials must be taught, not the other way round. But learning those dodging skills is definitely worth swallowing my pride. "I wouldn't ask you if I didn't."

"You don't get it!" Kuzon explains friendly, but firmly. Then he sighs and turns away. "It's complicated."

"I see..." I give in. I'm pretty sure I know where these answers are coming from. There is something Kuzon just doesn't want to talk about, and I have to respect that. Besides, it's not like I can't understand. But still, he's a colonial. Whatever he's hiding, it can't be good. "Well, that's unfortunate."

Seeming satisfied that I'm not going to probe any further, Kuzon is already back to his happy grin. "I can show you some dance movements instead, if you like! It's not all that different, actually."

"Dancing?"

Before we can go deeper into that suspicious topic, another voice sounds, "Hey, Kuzon!" A brunette girl with a ponytail joins us. I recognize her as On Ji. She smiles at me and bows. "Good morning, Kamina!"

"Hello, On Ji," I greet back. "You've been looking after Hide, right? How is he?"

"He's fine. He has some minor bruises, but the uniform took the brunt of the fall."

I narrow my eyes. What a shame, I've been hoping for a bit more. But well, Kuzon didn't touch him. What would have been there to leave serious injuries? "That's good. Kuzon would be in terrible trouble if Hide ended up hospitalized," I still find an upside to all this.

"Well, I already am in trouble," Kuzon remarks, causing me to look at him sideways.

"No, you're not. Unless your parents aren't on your side, that is. I already had one of those conferences, you just need to look thoroughly mortified and let your parents handle the rest."

"Uhm... what did you do, exactly?" Kuzon asks skeptically. He doesn't seem too impressed by the rest of my advice.

"I blew up a classroom," I state dryly.

"You did _what_?"

"Well, at least that's what she officially did," On Ji explains. "No one believes it, because it sounds so incredible that it must be a lie, but still. You know, there has been a loud crash in the music room, and when people came to look, it was a mess. With Kamina in the middle of it."

"Something must have shaken up the shelf with the small instruments," I add. That certain something was a sneeze of mine, actually, but I can't say that out loud. I've been hiding from Hide in the music room, but my hiding place behind the shelf was so dusty that it tickled my nose. And seeing how I'm an airbender, I've sent some instruments tumbling. "And someone had to be blamed for it. Since I was there, that was me, but my parents convinced the headmaster that the notion was ridiculous."

Kuzon laughs. "Yeah, it _is_ ridiculous." Then he sobers and adds, "It's not going to help me, though. I _did_ mess up."

"I've heard. Don't worry, Kuzon, you'll be fine as long as your parents got your back and you..." A deep sound carries over the yard, effectively cutting me off.

"Oh, that's the gong," On Ji states. "Let's get back inside!"

"Yeah, let's," I confirm and I'm already in the process of turning to the doors when Kuzon asks me to wait.

"What is it?"

"Thanks for your advice," he says and bows once again. "I'll talk to my parents about it."

I chuckle. "Sure thing! Anyone who can put Hide in his place is my friend. Wouldn't want you to get expelled for that, right?" Wait, what? Tongue, what are you doing?

On Ji keeps silent (it's her boyfriend we're talking about here), but she shoots Kuzon a glance which definitely agrees with my opinion. I wonder if she actually has the hots for the short colonial?

Returning to the classroom, I feel like things are looking up. With Kuzon around, I believe Hide is going to tone down a bit, having met his match. And if I stick around Kuzon, it may keep me safe.

Yeah, it's like using him for my own advantage. But that's okay. He's a colonial. A strong one, but a colonial nonetheless. I'll stoop down to his level and befriend him if it means he'll protect me. Maybe I'll even find out what's up with those eyes of his. While dark gray isn't strictly Air Nomad, he _could_ be an Air Nomad's descendant, too. That would be weird, but I'd like that. Not being alone anymore...

I shake my head. What's going on with me? While the part of me which is responsible for reason says I can't be actual friends with Kuzon, that he's a colonial and I should be a bit more distrustful, another, smaller part of me whispers that I really do like him, and that my attempts at building a friendship were actually sincere, as opposed to what I'm trying to persuade myself into believing so I have a socially acceptable justification for such a relationship. Shouldn't be too hard, right? Colonials aren't there to put your trust into them. Colonials are there to be taken advantage of. That's how it works.

Someone like me cannot trust anyone.

* * *

 **Hard one, this was. Trying to make clear that Kamina is torn between what she knows/learned and what she sees... Not easy!**

 **I like The Headband episode a lot, but I don't really like copying the script of an episode. I know a lot of people do it, but to me, it feels sorta wrong, so I'll keep it at a minimum!**

 **And now, I'm off to bed. Most people reading this are probably in another time zone, so you guys have a nice day!**

 **Zentauria over and out!**


	5. Cucumberpotatoes

**I'm amazed that I can read my reviews! For some reason, my stats said I have 6 reviews, but I could read only 3, and alert mails appear only for every other review. So I could only speculate what they may be about. But well, patience pays off? It means I can reply to the reviews now, wuuhuu!**

 **Anyway, next chapter!**

* * *

The next day has another surprise ready. Kuzon runs around, asking everyone who crosses his path to come to a certain cave this evening. He doesn't say why, but rumor has it that he's going to throw a dance party. It just serves to convince me even more that he has a screw loose somewhere. He just escaped the coal mines, what is he doing provoking the next conflict?

Well, not exactly my problem. I don't plan on going anyway. Social events just aren't my thing.

Hide leaves me alone for a change. I deliver his homework and that's it. He really decided that Kuzon should be his new punching bag, at least for now. I can hear him growl to one of his followers that the insolent colonial must be put in his place. I already see it coming, Hide snitching on Kuzon. I guess I should warn the kid.

It's hard, though. The students are over the rumors and Kuzon is surrounded by his classmates. He is incredibly popular, I can't reach him at all. Well, but he does. Once he spots me, he makes his way over to my position.

"Hello Kamina!"

"Hey, Kuzon. Good to see you didn't get send to the coal mines."

He grins, a little lopsided. "You know, I had someone to share her experiences with me," he states with a twinkle in his eyes and bows. I can't help a grin of my own, but it wouldn't last.

"Kuzon, I've been hearing you're organizing something. Whatever it is, stop it right now!"

"Why?" Kuzon asks, frowning before his face lightens up again. "It'll be fun. You should come, too!"

I let a facepalm communicate my opinion. "Listen, Kuzon, you already are on the headmaster's hit list, and Hide won't miss a chance to stab you in the back. You should really keep it down for a while!"

"Don't worry," he placates, smiling easily. "I'll be fine!"

"Well, if you're so sure about that..." I sigh. "I suppose there is no way to talk you out of that madness?"

Kuzon's only reaction is a chortle. "See you later!"

And with that, he's gone, off to invite other students perhaps, or chat with his classmates. I shake my head, deciding that the guy has totally lost his marbles. But if he wants to be sent away so badly, what am I to do? Apart from abandoning all hope of breaking out of my role as Hide's personal slave, that is. Such a crushing thought...

I spend the rest of the break in a far corner of the yard, back to my habit of avoiding people, feeling unworthy of anyone's attention. The resounding gong announces the beginning of class and thus an excuse to bury myself in textbooks. By the end of the day, I feel a lot better. After all, I can go home now and play with Mimi.

* * *

"Hello, everyone!"

"Welcome home, sweetie!" my mum calls. I kick off my shoes in the hallway and bring my satchel upstairs into the attic. I find Mimi in his room, playing with some soldier figurines.

"Take that, you Earth Kingdom spy!" he cries and uses one of his Fire Nation figurines to topple an Earth Kingdom one. I chuckle and enter.

"Hey, Mimi!"

"Kami! You're back!" he cheers and scrambles to his feet. "Come on, I have to show you that new firebending trick I learned!"

He doesn't ask if I want to see it, but that's okay. I giggle and let him drag me into the yard. I sit myself down on the porch and watch Mimi taking a stance, then inhale deeply and take a sudden leap. A forward kick in mid-air unleashes a stream of flames before Mimi lands smoothly back on his two feet. I clap, I can see the point of the move.

"Nice one! Jumping without the betraying movement of bending your knees first... Not everyone can do that."

"Right?" Mimi glows with pride. "My enemies won't know what hit them!"

"I'm sure they'll be quite surprised!" I play along, secretly hoping that the war will be over before Mimi is old enough to join the army. I don't want to see him sent to the front.

While Mimi keeps practicing his new move, my gaze travels across the yard. I've tried combining airbending with firebending forms before, and it didn't work out. Nothing to gain there, so I took to watching leaves fall, or blades of grass sway in the wind. But I still don't get it. Everything I can do is keep trying and hope for results. Only that every minute spent practicing airbending feels like a minute wasted.

I breathe deeply and get up from the porch. I position myself next to Mimi, take a firebending stance and prepare myself. I know enough forms and use them to keep fit, even though I can't produce fire.

* * *

The next time I check, mum tells us to take a break. I notice how my uniform is drenched with sweat and I breathe heavily. Mimi doesn't look any better. Mum brought some water to drink and we gratefully take it.

"Thank you!" I wheeze, while Mimi is already downing his drink. He manages a nod. My mum smiles and obviously feels the need to ruffle our hair.

"Take care not to overexert yourselves, my little firebenders," she quips. I roll my eyes and pretend I didn't hear that. "You should take a bath and change your clothes! Dinner will be ready soon."

And that's how it happens. A "Ladies first!" from Mimi tells me to go to the bathroom. We used to bathe together, but lately, Mimi starts getting bothered by his big sister seeing him naked. So we bathe separately. I think it's a bit silly, but if he insists...

After washing up, I put on a casual outfit, a short-sleeved tunic combined with a sleeveless surcoat, knee-length pants and wrist coverings in typical Fire Nation colors – red and golden. I like it better than the sooty black of the school uniform.

I'm playing a card game with Mimi when my dad comes home. Mimi and I call a greeting, but my mum leaves the stove to meet him in the hallway. Once properly arrived, dad joins Mimi and me in our game. A few minutes later, my mum's voice sounds through the house.

"Oh, dear!"

"What is it, honey?" dad inquires.

"I forgot to buy cucumberpotatoes. Will one of you be so kind and dash to the market?"

"I will!" I offer, stand up from my chair and grab a basket. "I'll be right back!"

"Take care, sweetie!"

And with that, I rush out the door and hit the road. The market isn't all that far and I'm there in no time. I walk up to the next stall.

"Five pounds of cucumberpotatoes, please!" That should last us a while.

While the stall's owner is busy weighing the vegetables, I have a look around the marketplace. I catch sight of some people who look awful familiar. Wait... Is that...

I narrow my eyes. Indeed, it's the headmaster, accompanied by some guards and Hide, making their way towards the cliff side. I realize they are after Kuzon and his dance party or whatever it might be.

"Turtle whiskers!" I curse. Even though I knew this would happen, I can't lose Kuzon now. Things are finally looking up, thanks to him, and I won't let my newfound luck be taken away from me like this. I turn to the merchant and basically growl at him, "Will you keep an eye on that basket for a minute? I'll be back!"

I don't even wait for the answer, I take off and follow the group. I have to get past them somehow, but how?

Well, first thing is catching up. I break into a run, but my muscles ache from my training session before. I'm weary. I try to ignore the pain and keep running, until I do indeed close in on the squad which doesn't seem to be in such a big hurry. Once I'm only a few hundred feet away, I slow down to catch my breath and search for a way to slip by them unnoticed.

Racking my brain, I remember the cave Kuzon described has an entrance at the back, so I slide around a corner branching off from the main path.

The thing is, I've forgotten how windy that way is. I lose precious time getting to the cave, and I begin to think I might as well turn around. I won't be there in time, anyway. But as long as I don't know for sure, I keep going, hoping that something may be hindering the headmaster and his pet.

When I finally arrive, I stop dead in my tracks. A big fluffy monster emerges from the back of the cave, with Kuzon sitting astride its head. There is a saddle on the beast's back, carrying another person I know – Kari. With them are a boy, probably Kari's brother, and a girl clinging to the saddle's rim like her life depends on it. I can only gape at them in shock, some part of me realizing that they noticed me, too. But the fluffy creature doesn't stop and it takes only a few seconds until it jumps off the cliff and flies. It flies!

My body switches into automatic mode. I don't really know what I'm doing, everything's fixed on finding out what happens here, and the most logical conclusion my shock-frozen mind seems to be able to come up with is... well, jump after them. Reeeeeeal logical.

I speed to the edge of the cliff and propel myself off the rocky ground, somewhat boosted by airbending. When I'm finally able to construct a senseful thought again, I'm already falling. Which switches my brain off once again, not with the shock of seeing something completely insane, but with the shock of the realization that I'm about to hit the surface of the ocean beneath me and have no chance of surviving the drop. And thus, I scream. I scream a long "AAAAAH!", not exactly heroic, but just the sort of thing normal people do. That is, until I crashland on something definitely not made of water, but my back still doesn't like it.

The impact drives the wind out of my body and an "Uuuumph!" escapes me. Gasping to refill my lungs with the much-needed oxygen, I finally realize that I'm not dead. Then everything goes black.

* * *

 **I apologize if the end sounds forced? Suicide by shock...**

 **The funny thing is that I can totally see that happen. At least inside the Avatarverse. Zuko pulled it, too. I mean, seriously dude! You shouldn't try jumping a war zeppelin when it is out of reach!**


	6. Culture Clash

**This one killed me twice. I really don't want to know how often I re-wrote it to finally reach something akin to satisfaction.**

 **Special thanks to Lotus Sword for being so good and pointing out some flaws in the flow of the story, so I could make the final tweaks.**

 **(So yes, this is a re-upload, for possible new arrivals.)**

* * *

"Katara! I can't believe you want to heal that fire monster!"

I groan, somewhat awake, but my brain is yet to start doing its job. I try to get up, but a hand is placed between my shoulder blades and gently presses me back onto my belly.

"Don't move," a voice orders, friendly but firmly. "You're hurt."

I comply, it's not like I'd manage anything beside that. I can feel that I'm hurt, no need to tell me. It's like a horde of rhinos stomped over my back. Some part of me which still functions in spite of the pain-induced stupor is pretty sure I shouldn't be lying on my belly, but I don't care. I can't even get myself to care when someone rolls up my tunic, exposing my back to the chilly night air, and then goes ahead and does... I don't even know, but it's soothing and I feel the tense muscles relax.

"Aang, out of all the crazy ideas you had, this is the most crazy! We can't take that girl with us, she's Fire Nation!"

"Did you want me to let her fall to her death?" I know that voice, but the connection to the corresponding face eludes me. "Katara, how is it going?"

"I don't know, Aang. Her chi is all twisted up, it can't be just the fall. Her body has been thoroughly damaged. I've never seen anything like it."

"What do you mean?"

There is a pause and the soothing sensation disappears. "You better ask her. How are you feeling, Kamina?"

Good enough to freak out. Once I hear my name, I finally realize that the voices I've been hearing belong to Kari and Kuzon. Only that they call each other Katara and Aang. I shoot up, panicking, but all it gets me is a crash against something hard, like a wall, and pain seems to split my back into half. I scream, unwanted tears springing to my eyes. I need to get out of here, but there is nowhere to go. Only clouds.

"Couldn't you have healed her a little longer, Katara? I still need my eardrums."

I turn to what I realize is the saddle of the flying fluff I've seen before. There are three other kids sitting around, one of them being the girl whom I thought to be Kari, but isn't. Right across the saddle is another girl, probably the one to make that comment, and last is a boy, sitting cross-legged in the rear of the saddle with a sort of sharp-looking club in his lap, ready to send me back into oblivion. No one moves, until Kari gets up on all fours and approaches.

Okay, that's it! Mimi was right, it was all a trap. They must be spies. She's going to punch me and ask questions I probably can't answer, and then punch me some more. Feeling cornered, I raise my arms and hunch my shoulders for protection. It's not much, but it's everything I have. This is even more awful than anything Hide ever did.

"Sh, it's okay." A hand comes up, making contact with my wrist and leading it away from my face. The comforting smile behind surprises me a bit. "We're not going to hurt you."

I don't believe it.

"Get off!" Out of reflex, I thrust the palm of my free hand forward and send a blast of air her way. It's a flimsily executed movement, but enough to push her back against the other side of the saddle. She shrieks with surprise, and so do I. But I don't have much time to celebrate, as the boy is already upon me. A neatly placed swipe sends me sprawling and before I know it, he's on my back, twisting my arms into a painful hold.

"You little leech! What did you do to my sister?!"

"Sokka, let her go!"

"No, Katara! She's too dangerous!"

I don't even try to keep my tears from flowing, it's no use anyway. My shoulders and back just hurt way too much. This situation is far out of my control, and while it's not the first time I feel totally helpless, at least my life has never been threatened like this. That boy appears just ready to throw me overboard.

"Guys, stop fighting!" Kuzon's voice rises for once. "Sokka, let her go! She was just defending herself."

"Yeah, and you're not helping her to settle down," the saddle-girl gets another word in. The guy called Sokka huffs and slips off me. With my arms released, I roll onto my back to catch my breath. I don't know what's going on, but I do know that I want to be far, far away.

"But, seriously, what did she do?" the girl pipes up again. I turn my gaze at her, she's twisting her pinkie in her ear as if trying to remove a hearing impairment. "From the sound of it, I'd say she was... _airbending_."

"No offense, Toph, but we're flying," Sokka retorts. "Of course you hear air moving around!"

"But it did feel like airbending, too," Kari... Katara... ponders. Weirdly enough, how would she know what airbending feels like? Or sounds, while we're at it?

"Are you kidding? Aang is the only airbender left, we all know that! You can't be serious!"

Wait a minute... Aang is the only...? No way! They can't be talking about the Avatar, right? I mean, the Avatar is dead! That Aang character is probably another Air Nomad descendant. But if that were the case, would it be so far-fetched to assume that there are others, and accept that I am one, too?

I wonder if I should say something. Instead, I somehow manage to sit and end up looking straight at Kuzon. Or Aang or whatnot. A lemur is perching on his shoulder, now retreating behind his back. How many pets does that guy have?

Aang's expression is hard to decipher. You may describe it as impassive, but the truth is that there are too many emotions to single one out. There is a sort of desperate hope glinting in his gray eyes, viciously contained by fear of disappointment. A tinge of sadness, too. But first and foremost is insecurity. And I know he's studying me as intently as I do. I wonder what he is seeing?

"Is it true?" he asks after a while. "You're an airbender?"

"I am. Untrained, but an airbender indeed. And you?" I shake my head, trying to sort my confusion out. "I can't believe I'm asking this, but... Are you the Avatar? The last Air Nomad, the one Prince Zuko supposedly slayed?"

"Actually, it was Azula," the girl named Toph comments. "But close enough."

I don't even get the time to digest the information given. Kuzon/Aang tackles me into a hug and starts crying into my shoulder, causing me to go stiff like a flagpole.

"Shut it, Sokka!" Katara is audible, but the words just bounce off me. I'm too perplexed to keep them in mind.

"What, I didn't say anything!"

"But you were going to."

"Someone explain to me what's up with you guys?" That's Toph.

While the others keep bickering, I'm still frozen. For a moment there, I forget everything I learned about the Avatar, the enemy of the state, the supposedly last airbender. I forget I should turn him in, that he is a nuisance that needs to be crushed. Right now, he's a boy who keeps sobbing into my chest and needs comforting. Just like Mimi.

Pulling my act together, I return the hug and gently rub the boy's back, while the lemur from before lands on my head. Yuck! But that matter has to wait.

"There, there. It's alright, nothing to cry about."

"I know." Even though he's crying, the little Avatar's voice is steady. "It's just... You can't imagine how happy I am to meet another airbender!"

"Probably not."

After that, the boy pulls back. He wipes his eyes and the indeed happiest of smiles spreads on his lips. "This is so amazing! I can't believe that there are still airbenders out there! I have so many questions!"

"Fire away!" I chuckle and pluck the lemur from my hair. "I don't promise anything, though!"

"How comes there are still Air Nomads around?"

"There aren't."

"But..."

Now I hurt him. Well, I guess the truth does hurt from time to time. "Look, Kuzon, or Aang or whatever, don't get your hopes up. The army was very thorough. They laid traps and..."

"I know." Aang's face contorts into a scowl. It looks rather out of place on him, I can already tell that much. "I've run into one of those before."

"Oh..." Should I tell him I'm sorry about that? Am I? "Anyway, I have no idea how many airbenders are out there. It's not like they go around telling everyone. Maybe it's just the two of us, or maybe it's two thousands, that's anyone's guess. The thing is, none of us is an Air Nomad. We're Air Nomads' descendants who happen to have inherited their bending abilities. And we try our hardest to hide it."

"I see... So, if you're caught by the Fire Nation, you'll be... you know, killed?"

"Yes."

"And you're fine with it?"

He looks pretty skeptical. He's obviously expecting me to cringe or something, give some kind of indication that in fact, I'm not.

He's mistaken. If death is the best service I can offer to my homeland, then death it shall be. Anything else is treason, and no one is going to imply that I'm too much of a coward to do what's best for the Fire Nation! And that goes especially for the Avatar!

"Are you questioning my loyalty to my country?" I growl and Aang winces. The lemur I've been petting absentmindedly squeaks and flutters back to the boy.

"No, no, I'm just..." said boy denies frantically, then breaks off. "Never mind. But I don't understand."

"Of course you don't!" Now furious, I inch a bit closer to Aang and jab my index at his chest. "You're just a puny little Air Nomad without the guts to face your enemy head-on! You're alive, but you're hiding! I bet you only survived the great Air Temple Battles because you ran away! What would a weak Air Nomad know about the honor of dying for your country? I can't believe I actually admired you!"

Aang's expression changes from stunned to intimidated and further to hurt. In the end, his gaze hardens. "And I can't believe I was happy to find you," he returns coldly and airbends himself off the saddle onto the fluff monster's head. I cross my arms and turn around, finally noticing the death glares I'm receiving.

"Why are you all looking at me like that?" I huff, but the faces remain unchanged.

"Gee, I wonder," Toph replies, sarcasm dripping off every word, causing me to turn away again and stare over the rim of the saddle, down at the clouds below.

I'm already sorry for what I said. Ranting about Air Nomads in school or with my brother is one thing. Looking one of them in the eye, seeing them hurt and upset is another matter altogether. Suddenly, it's much more _real_. Suddenly, I can _relate_.

But I guess an apology isn't going to cut it. There is an icy silence hanging over the group, and it drags on and on. Because of me.

I have to agree with Sokka. This is crazy! I shouldn't be here, surrounded by people of whom by now I'm not even sure are colonials. The Avatar, for Agni's sake! I even hugged him! I may as well jump off this fluff monster now. I'm a traitor. Well, actually, I've always been, hiding away instead of turning myself in...

I push that thought aside. I've only hid so I can live to serve my country, nothing less!

I let go of the saddle rim and curl into a ball, trying to catch some sleep. Things usually look brighter in the morning, but no matter how much I want the blackness to embrace me, it just doesn't happen. Which is why I can listen to the Avatar's fellowship talking as soon as they think I'm out.

"See, Aang? I told you we can't have that fire monster around, airbending or not! She'll rat us out as soon as we land!"

"I don't think so, Sokka." I'm surprised to hear Aang defend me.

"Didn't you listen to her?! She said she'd rather die than betray the Fire Nation! And I'm pretty sure not telling them that the Avatar is alive counts as betrayal."

"I guess so. But the thing is, she already _is_ betraying the Fire Nation, and she knows it."

"And what exactly makes you think that?"

Good question. I'd like to know that, too.

"The fact that she's here with us. She saw Appa. But instead of reporting it, she jumped off a cliff to get here. There is more behind this than she is letting on."

That guy knows me better than I do, doesn't he?

"Are you seriously planning to drag her along?"

"Yes. And I'm also planning to teach her airbending."

My heart skips a beat. Maybe I did fall asleep and this is a dream?

"And you're just going to let it slide that she insulted the Air Nomads like that?"

Aang sighs, I strain my ears. That kid is incredible. "Think about it for a moment, Sokka. What she said isn't something she came up with herself, but what she grew up with. Imagine you are an airbender in a society which drills into you that airbenders are weak and not worth the air they breathe. What do you think it would do to your confidence?"

Wow... that was pretty wise. Seems like there is no point in trying to hide it.

"You nailed it," I sigh, getting up and rubbing my eyes.

"You're awake?" Katara gasps. "How long?"

"All the time. I couldn't sleep because... Well, because I'm sorry, Aang. I shouldn't have insulted you and your people."

"It's okay."

"You're too kind," I tell him, and I mean it. "I'm not worthy of your forgiveness."

"Sure you are! Everyone makes mistakes. Besides, I do know where you're coming from."

"But..." I trail off, not exactly knowing what I'm trying to say. I just feel like disagreeing. "Never mind."

"Is there something you want to tell us?" Katara asks. "You definitely look like you need to talk."

"Well, I..." Should I really tell them? Tell them the accusations I threw at Aang are just a projection of my own insecurities? Tell them where the injuries Katara noticed come from? Can I trust those people? No. Not yet. "There is indeed something, but I don't want to talk about it." Maybe if it were just Aang and me...

"That's okay," Katara states. "Just tell us as soon as you're ready."

I place my hand above my fist and bow. "Thank you for having me. I won't disappoint you!"

Sokka crosses his arms. "I still think you're crazy."

"Yup, totally!" Toph agrees. But unlike Sokka, she doesn't seem to mind.

* * *

 **Hmm, here we go. Kamina is yet to be introduced to the Air Nomad philosophy of forgiveness. Aang is amazing as always, Katara is mothering everyone, Toph is in hard luck because the saddle isn't made of earth and she can't see a thing, and Sokka has a healthy portion of distrust. Who can blame him? Someone HAS to protect the group from suspicious individuals, and personality-wise, he's the only one up to the task.**

 **Hehe, I like Sokka~**

 **To Samichinabox: Uhm, what? I'm confused? I mean, sure, not everyone likes my work, that's just natural, but... Can you elaborate a bit, please? I don't bite people who're trying to help me improve my work. (Yeah, I take it as negative feedback. Correct me if I'm mistaken, but it sure looks negative to me.)**


	7. A Chance at Friendship

**And yet another difficult chapter I had to re-write a lot of times. I'll see what you guys think about it.**

 **(No, totally not asking for reviews! What makes you think that? Not that I can complain, I already have a lot of reviews, compared to many other stories of mine.)**

* * *

Rather than trying to talk to the group, I listen to them talking among themselves. Must have been some dance party they had.

They seem reluctant to talk about the Fire Nation in my presence, future plans they have. I didn't expect anything else. It's the Avatar's task to kill Firelord Ozai, as far as I know. What I don't get is why?

"Aang?" I do speak up in the end, leaning over the front rim of the saddle. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, go ahead!"

"It's the Avatar's duty to protect the balance in the world, right?"

He turns around, one eyebrow raised. His face practically screams _Where are you going with that?_

"Yes?" he drawls, prompting me to continue.

"Shouldn't you be _helping_ the Firelord then?"

"What?!"

Must have been quite an outrageous suggestion. Everyone looks at me like I told them to light the saddle on fire and eat it. Seems I have to elaborate a bit.

"See, balance means that there are no disturbances, right? Everything has the same measurements. Now, if the whole world were Fire Nation, then this condition would be met, right?"

"Do you even hear yourself?" Toph protests. "You don't believe the whole world can be assimilated like that, do you?"

"Toph is right, Kamina," Katara agrees. "It's not possible. There will always be differences, even if it is just the climate in some places to bring them forth."

"Besides," Aang adds, "balance isn't the same thing as equality, even if it were possible to achieve it. Balance means that there are different parties existing without disturbing each other. And also keeping each other alive. If the Fire Nation keeps waging war on the other nations..." He grips the fluff monster reins tighter and his tone darkens. "Sooner or later, they'll end up destroying themselves."

"What do you mean? I don't see that happening."

"It's hard to explain. The consequences would be on such a large scale, it's beyond human imagination. Let me try with a smaller example – the Fire Nation relies heavily on the production of metal, right? What do you think metal is?"

"Uhm... Metal?" Nothing wrong with playing dumb from time to time.

"It's earth. In fact, there is a metalbender among us."

Aang grins up the saddle, indicating Toph. The girl smirks and points a thump at herself. "The only one in the world!"

I can't help being impressed. "That's amazing, Toph!"

"Yeah, I know."

I blink perplexedly. That certainly wasn't the kind of response I expected. I guess, if there is something that girl isn't lacking, it's self-confidence. Envy...

"Some other 'onlys' I missed out on?" I wouldn't be too surprised. Only Air Nomad, only metalbender... What's next, the only flying platypusbear?

There is an uncomfortable silence, which stretches on until Aang snaps the fluff monster reins. "Well, none to be too happy about anyway. Come on, buddy! Katara, let's get that cloud camo going!"

The fluff monster makes a rumbling sound and I notice a decline in height. We're about to land. Aang jumps back into the saddle, now standing, and Katara gets up, too. Then they go ahead and use a bending form unknown to me in order to create a sort of fog around us. Slowly getting used to surprises, I already have my suspicions.

"So, if Toph is an earthbender, and Aang is the Avatar, then Katara is a waterbender and clouds are made of water?"

"Exactly!" Aang grins, and I can't help but mirror it.

"This is so amazing! I always wondered what clouds are made of!"

Fascinated, I reach out for the mist and, sure enough, little droplets of water start forming on my skin. I withdraw my hand, but before I can take a closer look, the lemur is clinging to my forearm and starts licking the water off. It tickles and a giggle crawls up my throat.

Aang laughs. "Well guys, looks like Momo approves of our new comrade."

"I'm happy to hear you say that, Aang." I gently shoo the lemur away and use my breath to airbend my hand dry. It's pretty much the only move I can pull off without problems. "So, what now?"

"Now we find a good spot to land," Aang explains and nods at Sokka, who is already leaning over the saddle rim. I follow his example and squint at the landscape below.

"Looks like a strip mine. There should be caves down there, if that's what you need."

"It's perfect!"

"But we have to check if it's abandoned first," Sokka objects.

"Then maybe we should find something else," Katara concludes. "But we'll keep the strip mine in mind as a backup."

I feel she only says it so I don't have to feel completely useless. Well, whatever. Aang soon finds us a nice trench a bit off the mine, and the two benders give up the camouflage, seeing how a sinking cloud would be just as suspicious as a flying fluff monster, and at least it won't divide their focus anymore.

"Well, I guess that does the job as well..." I comment the landing place of choice. Once we're safely on the ground, Toph wastes no time with jumping off, seeming very eager to feel the earth beneath her feet. I guess it makes sense, seeing how she is an earthbender and everything... The rest is a bit more relaxed about it. Aang glides down, the Water Tribe siblings nonchalantly slip off. Myself, I eye the beast suspiciously, searching for the safest way down and opting for the broad tail. Only that I end up belly-flopping and slide down in the probably most undignified way possible until I find myself prone on the stone floor. Both Sokka and Toph obviously think it's hilarious, Aang presses a hand over his mouth, choking on a chuckle, while Katara comes over to help me up. However, she's quietly giggling herself. I find myself joining in, but not before distributing a handful of death glares for good measure.

"And that's why I hate riding," I complain halfheartedly, the other half still vibrating with mirth, and dust off my clothes. "I never seem to be able to dismount properly."

"You'll get the hang of it," Katara assures, then another voice from somewhere behind startles me.

"Kamina!"

Aang waves me over to the face of the fluff monster. I do him the favor, though a bit reluctant. What if that creature considers me an appetizing snack? Aang doesn't even seem to notice.

"I want you to meet Appa, my sky bison!" he introduces his pet cheerily. "Look Appa, this is Kamina! She's an _airbender_!"

He emphasizes the last word a bit, slowing down as if to savor the feeling of it rolling off his tongue. The boy certainly knows how to express himself.

The bison opens his mouth wide and emits a booming sound. I flinch back, but then Appa sticks out his vast tongue and proceeds to lick me good. In a matter of seconds, I'm covered in bison saliva.

I look down at myself, grimacing in a mixture of disgust and disbelief. "Uah..."

Aang grins. "It's okay, it'll wash out!"

"That's not the point!" I protest when Katara joins us, an encouraging smile on her lips, with a tinge of pity.

"Don't worry, you'll get used to it!" she states and thankfully bends the slobber off me. "We've all been through it."

"I'm not sure if I _want_ to get used to it..."

"The choice is not yours!" Toph calls from a stone she found to lean against. I'm pretty sure she's gloating.

"Right..." I grumble, but let the matter slide. "So, what now?"

"Now, we set up camp," Katara explains. "We'll unload first, then Aang and Sokka will take Appa to search for firewood. You can go with them. Toph will make a fireplace, then the two of us will fetch water, I've seen a creek nearby. Once we have the fire going, you can help me cook if you want."

"I'd love to!" I clap my hands in excitement. "Let's get busy!"

"Always good to see someone so motivated," Sokka comments without any motivation.

"You can stay cold tonight, if you like it better that way," Aang deadpans, before jumping into Appa's saddle and smoothly airbending the luggage to the ground. It's not exactly much, in fact, the whole pile is composed of two sleeping bags apparently belonging to Sokka and Katara, some money, a few weapons and scrolls and three baskets with groceries. While unpacking, spark rocks fall into my hands, and I catch myself toying with them for a moment before asking: "Spark rocks? I thought Aang's the Avatar? He can make a campfire, right?"

"And who do you think would have taught him to do that?" Toph shoots back, causing me to pause.

"Well..." I mumble awkwardly and drop the spark rocks back into the small pouch I found them in. I throw the pouch next to the food baskets and turn to the group. "But this isn't right! The Avatar has to master firebending!"

That may sound weird for a Fire Nation citizen to say, but even I accept that there are forces above the squabbles of the mortal world, forces we must bow to. And one of these forces is the Avatar. Aang is still young, and in a peaceful era, he'd have plenty of time left to master firebending. In these days, however, he can die any minute. He shouldn't rejoin the incarnation cycle before even getting a shot at firebending, that's just plain wrong!

Aang and Katara send me long-suffering looks. Toph stamps a fireplace out of the ground. Sokka, spreading his sleeping bag, is the only one to comment.

"Well, unless you can _magically_ conjure up a firebender who'd be willing to teach Aang, I'm afraid he won't learn it in the near future," he remarks sarcastically, underlining his words by raising his hands over his head and moving his fingers around, as if trying to summon a ghost.

Hmm, improbable. Saving the Fire Nation from itself isn't a good enough reason to convince anyone. It's yet to convince _me_ completely, and my experiences with Fire Nation folks aren't exactly fulfilling.

A thought occurs to me and I snap my fingers in delight. "I can teach Aang!"

I'm such a genius! The others can't appreciate it, though. Aang's eyes widen, he looks confused. Katara is shocked. Toph crosses her arms, head slightly tilted to the side. Sokka is... hard to describe. He looks like someone attached a weight to his face.

"How are you going to do that?" Aang asks. "You're an airbender, right?"

"So?" I retort tersely. "I may not be able to produce fire, but I still know the theory. I'd be happy to share that knowledge."

There is a major look-sharing going on in the group. Toph seems to be a bit out of it, but I can feel something pass between the Avatar and the Water Tribe siblings. I can't put my finger on it, but something tells me that my idea isn't greeted with the enthusiasm it deserves.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Aang states, but his tone and face tell another story. It makes me wonder, but it's obvious no one wants to tell me. Maybe later, once I earned their trust.

"So, you want me to teach you or not?"

Aang smiles and puts his fist and palm together for the traditional bow. I didn't think much of it before. I see plenty juniors bowing to seniors in my everyday life. But now I know who that kid actually is, the gesture suddenly means so much more.

"I'd like you to teach me, Sifu Kamina."

I feel my body temperature rising at the address, but I manage to keep my cool. This is a ritual, and it would be wrong to disturb the atmosphere. So I, too, place the heel of my hand on my fist and bow.

"Then that's the way it shall be, Sifu Aang." So much for not ruining the ritual.

Aang's my teacher, too, and thus a Sifu. Both people saying Sifu isn't very traditional, but I can't bring myself to mind. I think it's funny, so I just straighten and grin at Aang, who totally grins back.

We'll get along like fire and brimstone, I feel it in my guts.

* * *

 **The first version had a part dedicated to Kamina's family, but it sounded so forced that I had to edit it out. Next chapter will probably have it, but for now, there is just too much excitement, in other words - distraction.**

 **A guest reviewer remarked on how technically, Sozin didn't empty the air temples, as flying lemurs obviously survived, resulting in Momo. Now, that's totally right. We also have a sky bison population in Avatar Korra which shows us that Appa can't be the last sky bison as well. Still, it's not a "mistake", because it's Kamina's first person POV and her train of thought just isn't specific enough for exceptions. Humans tend to think in human terms. I'd like to see someone who reads/reproduces information about genocide and thinks of the pets while doing it. It may come in hindsight, but it just isn't the sort of thing to think about unless confronted with it. It would have been a lot weirder to point out that lemurs survived the battles, wouldn't it? People call a lot of things "empty" which technically aren't. That's just what people do, nothing wrong with that.**

 **But enough of that explanation, I guess it becomes increasingly tedious to read. Just wanted to get the point across.**

 **Merry Christmas, everyone! Zentauria over and out!**


	8. Firewood

**And here we go again! Updates will be slower from now on. I had chapter 3-7 written out after I returned from my snowboarding trip, which means I have to write stuff now instead of only correcting. Right, and holidays are over, too. Tragic story, really.**

* * *

"Look, a forest! We should be able to find some firewood over there!" I call out, pointing at the landscape below.

"Good work, Kamina," Aang responds and steers Appa toward the treeline. "Looks like we'll have a nice warm campfire tonight!"

I stare down dreamily. I've never been camping before, and I'm excited to see what kind of experience it will be. A crackling fireplace, preparing food ourselves, telling stories and sleep under the stars... That sounds real romantic!

Right now it's rather awkward, though. Sokka is still radiating hostility from his place in the back of the saddle. Not as badly as before, so much is true. But still... I prefer avoiding eye contact.

We land in the outskirts of the forest. Aang again uses airbending to dismount, Sokka jumps off. This time, I follow his example. I can feel the impact and involuntarily bend my knees a bit, but it's not nearly as painful as expected. After the catastrophe from before, I'm very proud of myself.

"Well, what do you know?" I chuckle. "Looks like I _do_ have some dismounting skills after all."

Aang grins. "Just wait until I teach you to bolster your movements with airbending!" Still grinning, he turns to Appa. "Thanks, buddy."

The sky bison lows in turn and makes himself comfortable on the ground.

"Aang, we need to get going!" Sokka urges and gestures to the forest. "We don't have all night. The less time we spend out here, the less likely we'll get caught."

"Alright, oh schedule master!" Aang teases good-naturedly. I smile at the exchange, before I follow the boys into the forest.

To be honest, they do most of the work. Aang is remarkably sure-footed in the darkness (leaving his boots behind for some reason) and quickly finds himself a good pile of small branches. Sokka uses a machete to cut logs from thicker branches.

There is that one time I find a young, but uprooted tree just lying around, and struggle to break it apart in order to carry it. My back starts to hurt again. Sokka apparently overhears my grunts and comes over, machete brandished.

"Step back," he says in a neutral tone which is neither an order nor an offer. I shrug and do as told, letting the Water Tribe teen hack away at my fallen tree until it's a row of handy, rather neatly cut pieces.

"Uhm, thanks..." I mumble awkwardly. "That's quite a machete you've got there. Didn't know you can cut wood with such a weapon."

Sokka's features actually brighten at this. "Well, I spend a lot of time sharpening it," he explains easily, with pride in his tone. Then he seems to remember that he doesn't like me, his expression hardens and he turns around to keep searching.

My gaze lingers on his back for a moment, I don't know what to make of it all. I guess Sokka is actually a pretty nice guy, but it only makes his rejection even more painful.

I suppress the stinging feeling in my stomach and start carrying my tree to the spot where Aang places his firewood as well, figuring it would be easier to leave it to the Avatar to whip out some earthbending for transport, rather than hauling the firewood all the way back to Appa.

And that's what happens once Sokka deems our spoils to be sufficient. Aang pushes the firewood out of the forest with some sort of earth wave, but he insists on loading the bison's saddle by hand. Else, it might hurt his friend, just torpedoing him with logs. But at least he lifts the logs to saddle height and saves us a lot of jumping.

"Aang?" I draw the boy's the attention to myself while absentmindedly passing Sokka a bundle of small branches. Or are they large twigs?

"Hmm?"

"I've been meaning to ask... Why did you ask Toph whether someone's around or not? She couldn't have seen more outside the trench than the rest of us, right?"

"In fact, she can," Aang announces and I raise my brows, prompting him to elaborate. He rubs his head. "It probably sounds weird, but Toph is blind."

"What?!"

"That's right. But she uses earthbending to see."

"That does sound weird. How does it work?"

"By sensing the vibrations in the earth. You see, if you walk around, your feet cause slight tremors in the ground. An earthbender can pick up on those tremors."

Now _that's_ an impressive skill. "Remind me not to go ahead and try sneaking up on an earthbender," I joke and Aang chuckles quietly. "But it makes sense now. Her behavior and everything, that ferocious holding onto the saddle and the hurry to get off. And I guess she can see outside the trench then. Even you taking your boots off and strolling around as if it were high noon!"

"Where are my boots, anyway?"

I look at him in disbelief for a moment, then I burst into laughter. "Seriously?"

He laughs sheepishly, reminding me that he is just a child after all. But the boots are found quickly, buried under the pile of firewood. Aang puts them on while Sokka and me store the last pieces of firewood away.

The little Avatar slips into his usual place, and with a "Yip-yip!", we're back in the air, on the way to camp.

* * *

The flight back isn't any less strained. Sokka sharpens his machete (I guess hacking away at a tree isn't conducing to a sufficiently keen blade), and Aang silently encourages me to talk to him. It's not a long flight, so the likelihood of sliding into uncomfortable subjects isn't all that high.

I nod confirmation and turn around. I open my mouth and... close it again. What exactly would I try to talk about? Nothing springs to mind. I don't know what Sokka is interested in, what kind of loose nerves to avoid he has. Besides, I don't want to impose myself on him, that would be counterproductive.

I flash a desperate look at Aang and shake my head before resorting to watching the strip mine pass beneath us. How is this supposed to work out?

"So..." Aang takes the word. "What do you plan on preparing for dinner, Kamina?"

" _Me_?" I exclaim, startled. Why would he ask me that? "I was planning to just go along with whatever Katara decides. She knows better."

"Whaaat?" Aang promptly laments. I believe half of it is acting for the sake of conversation. "I haven't had a Crackling Cabbage in a hundred years!"

"A what?"

Sokka's voice catches me off-guard and I send him a puzzled look. It's more of a reflex and I'm already turned back at Aang before I even notice. The little Avatar winks, making me realize that he didn't bring up the topic without reason. Discussing food is a harmless enough kind of talk.

I lean back, relaxing muscles I didn't even notice tensing. "It's a sort of filled dumpling," I explain, putting my fingertips together in a round shape. "It's called Crackling Cabbage because the main ingredient for the filling is cabbage, but you can also use meat or whatever you like best." Sokka's face becomes somewhat dreamy at the mention of meat, eliciting a chuckle from my throat. "It's not exactly the on-the-road kind of food, though. At least concerning the preparation," I add wistfully and Sokka's face falls.

"Oh, I'm sure it can be arranged," Aang states triumphantly. "Katara and I can create pretty much every kitchenware from ice."

"Ice?" I try to imagine myself kneading dough on a plate of ice. It makes me skeptical, and I raise an eyebrow at the Avatar. "It sounds so... flashy?"

Aang laughs. "You'll get used to it! Hey, we're here!"

Appa has already been descending even before any of us noticed. Shortly after, the bison's feet touch the ground and Katara welcomes us immediately, along with Momo. The lemur lands in front of Appa's face and the two animals seem to have a nice chat.

"How did it go?" Katara asks as soon as the three of us are back on solid ground. I'm getting better at this!

"Great!" Aang reports and airbends the saddle plus firewood off of Appa's back. "We found enough firewood for the next three or four days. Sorry you have to carry it all, buddy," he adds, petting the bison. Appa lows and I'm pretty sure he's telling Aang that he doesn't mind. The little Avatar turns back to Katara. "And you? Did you find the creek you mentioned?"

"Yes," the waterbender replies, gesturing to two rather large pots. I walk over and take a look, only now realizing how thirsty I am. When was the last time I had a drink? "Now _that's_ some clean water! Can I have some? I'm parched!"

"We all are," Aang states and raises his arms. With an elegant move, he makes the water stream out of the first pot and I watch it disappear into Appa's mouth in two gigantic gulps. The bison licks his lips with obvious satisfaction.

Katara steps up with three bowls. Two of them, she hands to Aang and Sokka, and I'm a bit surprised to receive the third. "Here, you can borrow mine for now."

I have to process the gesture first, thus thanking her with a bit of a delay, and the brunette is already bending the water from the second pot. Some of it into the bowls, and some of it into the empty first pot. I don't think much about it, I barely take the time to thank her again before taking a swig from my bowl, enjoying the blissful sensation of cold water running down my dry throat.

"Aah, that's the stuff!"

"Don't worry, you'll be sick of it soon enough," Toph announces and I look at her briefly before shrugging the comment off.

"Won't keep me from enjoying it now."

"That's the spirit!" Aang chimes and puts his bowl down. "Let's build the fire, it's getting late and we didn't even eat yet."

"Good idea, Aang," Katara agrees, but the voice of her brother solves the problem.

"Way ahead of ya!" Sokka calls and I find him kneeling next to the fireplace, wood neatly stacked, and striking the spark rocks like a professional. A few minutes later, we have a nice little cooking fire going.

As it turns out, Katara doesn't need me for preparing dinner. While we sit around waiting for the water to start boiling, Aang lets out a yawn. It infects everyone else and before long, we're all yearning for sleep, which results in Katara simply cooking some rice, sacrificing flavor for speed.

Aang quickly produces a pair of makeshift chopsticks and a bowl from the soil beneath us. I don't like the idea too much, who knows what the ground is made of? But seeing how the rice is too hot for ice, the choice isn't so terribly vast.

However, Aang seems to read me just fine and makes the bowl vanish again, offering to share his rice. I accept with profound relief and move closer to the boy. A random glance in Katara's direction makes me second-guess my decision – the Water Tribe girl doesn't look pleased. What's up with her? It's not like I'm going to poke holes into Aang with my maybe-healthy-maybe-not chopsticks.

Then the impression disappears and I push the thought to the back of my mind. If there is a problem, I'll find out. I don't need it to bother me while eating, I'm busy enough overcoming my distrust towards my eating utensils.

As expected, the rice is nothing fancy where taste is concerned, but better than nothing. Sokka outlines the plans for tomorrow, when we have to get up, how much ground we have to cover and such things. I only lend half an ear, already annoyed, and apparently, I'm not the only one to feel that way – as soon as she's finished her rice, Toph throws her bowl into the first pot (so the water is probably for dish-washing) and brashly walks out on Sokka.

"Hey!" comes the boy's obligatory protest, but then his face changes to betray a sort of annoyed resignation. I'd say this isn't the first time.

The Earth Kingdom girl drops to the ground, calling a somewhat brusque "Good night!" before bending an earth tent out of the ground and sealing it shut around her.

"What's with her?" I demand to know, unsure whether I should be offended or doubtful.

"Toph has a bit of a problem with social skills," Katara explains. "But her heart is in the right place. You have to take her antics with humor."

"Alright." Guess I'll try that. Knowing myself, I'm not sure that I manage. Depends on the form the issue expresses itself in, really. Let's see how things work out.

I feel a yawn coming up, and I don't bother hiding it. "I'd like to hit the pillow myself, if you don't mind. I had a rough day."

"Yeah, a lot has happened," Aang agrees, apparently trying to stifle a yawn of his own and failing. "Are you finished?" he adds, indicating his bowl.

"I am, thank you. But..." I look around, reflexively searching for a pillow to hit. Only that there is none. I rub my temple tiredly, once again reminded of how jumping after Appa was a terrible idea. I'm going on a journey and I'm totally unprepared. No sleeping bag, no spare clothes, nothing at all.

"I suppose you can't create a sleeping bag from thin air, Aang?"

"Uhm... No," he drawls, apparently realizing my problem, but it doesn't take long for him to brighten. "But you can sleep on Appa, if you want. I do it all the time!"

The sky bison in question lows his consent, or at least I hope so.

"Alright everyone!" Sokka announces and stands up to follow Toph's example concerning the bowl storage. "Sleepy time!"

"What about the rice?" I ask.

"We'll save it for breakfast tomorrow," Katara explains and nods at Aang, who takes a stance and a few seconds later, the pot and some ice is sealed inside a small earthen pyramid.

"Tada! Keeps the rice cool and free of bugs!"

"Nice one, Aang!" I chuckle. "Well, that's settled then." I get up and dust off my clothes. "Good night, everyone. See you in the morning."

"Good night," Katara smiles and walks over to her sleeping bag next to Sokka's one. Her brother is sitting there and I search his gaze.

"Sleep well," I wish him plainly, completely aware that he won't get much sleep. His brows knit together, I feel he's sensing the thoughts behind the move.

I give Appa a pet on the nose, then I circle the bison and plop down on his tail. It's surprisingly comfy without the hard saddle, and warm. But as soon as I close my eyes, I know Sokka isn't the only one who won't sleep a wink tonight.

* * *

 **So much about thinking family in this chapter. Well, next one definitely, the start's done.**

 **So, guest reviews...**

 **Guest aka Samichinabox (I suppose): Right, always those cliffhangers. Writers are so evil, aren't they? XP I'm glad it wasn't a declaration of hate.**

 **Guest with long review about pets and animal guides: I read that review pretty often. I don't know what you're intending, but I don't think you would type so much for the sake of annoying me. However, even knowing that, it comes off as patronizing. The point remains the same: It's Kamina's first person POV, she narrates the way she thinks is right, and that doesn't necessarily overlap with what is a fact of the Avatarverse.  
I know the series by heart, I did a lot of background research and I check my chapters at least three times before posting them. ****I know that Appa is more than a pet, but Kamina does not. That's not a mistake, but an issue of narration, and I didn't choose that specific style carelessly.  
I mean, thank you for trying to help me here, but I would appreciate it if you stopped latching onto the narrator's choice of words and tell me something I DON'T know. (Admitted, I didn't know as much details about those Korra sky bisons as you gave, but I don't like Korra enough to dig too deeply there and it doesn't have any connection whatsoever ****to my story, so I didn't see a reason for it. If there WERE a connection, it would be another matter.)  
**

 **I think it's funny. There are points in this story which are a lot more arguable than Kamina thinking about Appa as Aang's pet. The vegetables, for example. There is a lot less mix-and-match food appearing in the series than mix-and-match critters do. Only tomatocarrots, actually.**

 **And of course, Kami's hair. It's slightly wavy. There are barely any characters with wavy hair, and even if it does look like they could be wavy, it's still up to interpretation. (Mostly talking about Bato, Aang plus children, Jinora and the Bei Fong sisters here. Who knows what they do to their hair?)**

 **Well, whatever. I think I'm done with commenting now? If I keep this up, the A/N will turn out longer than the chapter, and we can't have that, right? ^^"**


	9. Nightthoughts and Morningtrouble

**Man, I'm so, SO dead. So much stuff to keep in mind while writing this...**

* * *

When nightfall comes, silence reigns. The only sounds carrying around the campsite are the crackling of the dying fireplace and the faint snoring reverberating through Appa's body. Not the kind of sounds to disturb a good night's sleep. And yet, I'm wide awake.

I left my family behind. I went to buy dinner and then... I disappeared on them. I never had a chance to say goodbye, and there is no telling how much time will trickle away before I see them again.

I can picture them so clearly... My mum, sitting at the dining table in the living room, face buried in her hands, shaking and sobbing. My dad next to her, holding her in his arms and whispering encouraging words he doesn't believe himself. And Mimi, oh Mimi! He doesn't cry, he denies it himself. He paces inside his room like a caged tigerdillo and promises havoc on everyone who dares lying a finger on his sister.

I'm feeling so unbearably guilty for worrying them. They must assume I've been kidnapped! Well, in a way, I was. But it's my fault, mine alone. It has been my own decision to jump after Appa, setting up the dilemma for Aang of either killing me or taking me with them.

I feel guilty about that as well. As far as the group is concerned, I'm a liability. While everyone seems to defer to Aang's decisions, trust is another matter. I can't blame Sokka for being paranoid. My presence alone causes tensions in the group, and the last thing I want is standing between them.

But neither do I want to turn back now. Even if they'd be willing to let me go, which I don't see happening in the near future, I already know that I'd be regretting it for the rest of my life. Learning airbending from a master means I won't need to be afraid of accidentally revealing myself anymore. Traveling with Aang also means breaking free of Hide, and that counts for something. And I feel comfortable with the little Avatar, and with Katara. It's like... actually having a chance to make friends. With the enemy. Oh, the irony.

Being so torn doesn't help me feel any better. I'm just one person, there is only one place I can be at a time. And even if I actually _wanted_ to sneak off, I have no idea which way to go, or how far it is. No chance.

It's a bit of a relief, though. I don't have to choose, because there is no choice to make. It's only straight forward from here, and it's up to me to make the best of it.

Repeating that thought over and over in my mind, I curl up on Appa's tail. It only gets me so far, and after a while, I'm back to feeling terrible. But in the end, I pass out anyway.

* * *

I sleep fitfully, and I'm not surprised to find that I'm the first one to wake up. It's twilight, with the sun still in the process of rising. Disoriented at first, I wonder where I am and what I'm doing here. The memories wash over me like a powerful wave, sweeping me from my feet.

I'm with the Avatar. I promised to teach him firebending. He promised to teach me airbending. I'm a traitor. If anyone finds out, I'm dead meat. My family is gone. I have no idea what I'm doing!

Okay Kami, calm down! First things first: That my family is unreachable is something I can't change. It's cruel, but that's the way it is. No use crying over it. Crying is weakness. And weakness invites bullying.

I'm part of this group now. Which means I have to observe how they operate, find my place in it. And then I'll see. I can't make any plans without a clue what's going on.

Seeing how overthinking things doesn't help my case much, I resort to watching the sunrise. It's beautiful out here, with no houses to obscure the view of the pink spectacle slowly bleeding into orange, then blue. I can't tear my eyes off it, and for a moment, I forget my problems.

After a while, the urge to find myself a nice bush hits me. I have to leave the camp for that and walk a couple yards. Too close would be a bit disgusting.

But I didn't expect to be gone long enough for the rest of the group to get up for the morning. Once I set foot back into camp, Sokka drops the bedroll he is in the middle of folding.

"Where have you been?" he demands, obviously not pleased with my disappearance.

I cross my arms. "Relax, I was just following the call of nature!" I tell him, half explaining, half challenging. "Want any details?"

He doesn't, I can see that more than clearly.

"Told you, Sokka!" Aang announces, tugging at the reins fixed to Appa's horns. Then he pauses and floats to the ground. "While we're at it, I gotta go!"

And with that, he swishes off. Sokka stares after him with a funny expression, then he groans.

"Hey, don't even try to convince me you're above it!" I protest, and as a consequence, I draw Sokka's attention to myself. He's not amused.

"This talk is gross," he declares dryly and picks up his sleeping bag. Behind him, Toph laughs.

"You guys are hilarious!"

Katara on the other side cups her forehead tiredly before opening her arms and raising her voice.

"Alright everyone, we're just getting used to each other, but I'm sure we can work through this without fighting. We just need to keep calm!"

I heave a deep sigh, realizing the truth in her words. Sokka has every right to be wary when the group wakes up and I'm not around. I shouldn't have provoked him. Besides, as far as I can gleam from his demeanor, Sokka is older than me, and thus a person of respect.

As my upbringing asserts itself, I find myself putting my hands together and bowing to the teen.

"I apologize for my disappearance and my following words. I hope you can forgive that slip of the tongue."

What little of my pride survived the last couple years screams at me to desist from such an act of deference towards a Water Tribe savage. I tell said pride to shut up.

I feel a hand on my shoulder and look up to meet eyes with Katara. She smiles mildly.

"No need to apologize. My brother is behaving like a jerk."

At that, she sends a pointed look Sokka's way, who seems thoroughly taken aback. But not by his sister, no – by me!

"It's okay, Katara." I smile at the girl, who has been nice to me since the very second we met. Sokka just can't be a jerk when he grew up with someone like her. I step up to the boy and look squarely into his eyes. Or at least I try as much, I can't hold the gaze. Before I know it, I'm already looking elsewhere, nerves all aflutter. But now that I made my move, I can't back out. I don't want to, either. It has to be done for this nonsense to end.

"Listen, Sokka," I begin, trying to sort out words. "I understand why you don't trust me, and I don't blame you. I won't ask for your trust, I can't do that. I just..." I rub my arm, still looking anywhere but ahead. "I just ask you to consider that I'm a human being with feelings."

I finally manage to gather the determination to look up, and it's encouraging to find that Sokka's gaze has softened a little, eyebrow raised. He appears intent rather than hostile.

I take a deep breath. "Aang is my friend," I state with utmost sincerity. (And _boy_ Agni knows I have too few of those.) "No harm will come to him as long as I can help it, I promise. And believe me when I tell you that there is nothing us Fire Nation folks take as seriously as our honor. We never go back on our promises."

Sokka holds my gaze for another second or two, studying me closely. This time, I force myself to stand my ground and refrain from averting my eyes. I have nothing to hide.

In the end, it's Sokka who gives in. "Alright, can't argue with an honor-obsessed fire monster."

"What?!" I take offense. Obsessed? Seriously?!

I hear chuckling, and I feel there is some sort of joke going on whose punchline went right over my head.

A smirk creeps onto Sokka's face. A small one, but a smirk nonetheless. I can barely contain my joy. I broke through to him! Oh Agni and the High Dragons, I broke through to him!

"Let's call it truce, okay?" Sokka offers, and I'm just about to jump him and fling my arms around his neck. But, well, I guess I should refrain from that. No hugging people who don't trust you. Terrible idea.

So I stick with nodding and grinning hugely. "Yeah!"

A weight on my shoulders catches me by surprise, but I don't mind. "Hey, little guy!" I call the lemur, having forgotten his name, and pet his head. But the rush of bliss wears off soon enough. It's a start, but the goal is still way out of reach.

I'm about to ask Katara if I can help around camp when the girl herself speaks up, "Where is Aang? He should be back by now."

"Maybe he just went a good way off," I try to placate her worry. "I took about this long myself."

But now that she mentioned it, I can't keep a lingering doubt from my mind. What if something happened to the little Avatar? No, he can take care of himself, right?

I pet the lemur on my shoulder again when he suddenly squawks and spreads his wings. A scratching sound reaches my ears and I find Aang sliding down the wall of the trench.

"Aang!" Katara calls out for him. "What took you so long?"

"I almost ran into a Fire Nation patrol," the boy explains, "and I had to hide until they were gone. I guess the strip mine isn't abandoned after all."

That makes sense. They wouldn't guard it if it were.

"So we have to walk," Sokka groans.

"At least until we're out of sight," Aang responds, equally unmotivated. Toph on the other hand looks very pleased.

"No flying?" she cheers and drops to her back, sighing contently. "Alright!"

"At least someone's happy." Myself, I'm not sure what to expect. Maybe it'll be fun? "Anyhow, I vote for breakfast. Who's with me?"

"Me! Me!" Aang raises a hand, causing me to smile at his enthusiasm.

"Then you better free our food, Master Icy Earth Pyramid," I giggle, while Katara announces that she'll take care of the bowls. Which are still floating in the other pot, as I realize.

But the Water Tribe girl makes an awesome dish-washer. She fills the bowls up with water, freezes it and bends the ice out, together with any stray grain.

"Nice!" I compliment her, watching the process with wide eyes.

"It's a good way to clean quickly, but it doesn't replace a good scrubbing," Katara explains.

"Well, it's fine for now," Aang states pragmatically, sitting down on the ground. It's the return of the maybe-healthy-maybe-not chopsticks. I sit next to Aang and pick them up, scrutinizing Katara all the while. Nothing happens. Maybe I _did_ imagine that death glare yesterday after all?

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Katara wants to know, but she sounds confused rather than suspicious.

I hastily turn away. "Uhm, sorry," I apologize sheepishly. "I just... Never mind. I'm being an idiot." With my attempts at looking anywhere but Katara, my gaze lands on Aang, who looks at me quizzically.

"Are you alright?"

"Sure."

Another voice comes from across the circle we automatically sat ourselves down in. Although the campfire has died overnight, somehow we still sit around it.

"You're not really good at keeping eye contact, are you?" Toph comments.

I frown at the blind girl. "How would you know?"

"Your weight is shifting around. All the time!" she rants, raising her arms, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"You see, if you look into a certain direction, the rest of your body follows," Aang pipes up. "You can even use that in a fight. A good way to stop an enemy's charge is making them look elsewhere."

"Are you sure? It sounds so... simple."

"Simple, but effective!" he asserts with a huge grin.

"Listen to Aang," Sokka agrees. "He's pretty much the master of non-physical butt-kicking."

"Sokka!" Aang grumbles, but the Water Tribe teen in question remains unfazed. He raises his hands and shrugs, looking about as nonchalant as you can get.

"I'm just saying."

I chuckle. Sokka is funny. And I'm pretty sure he's right, seeing how Aang dodge-beat Hide in the school yard.

"Alright everyone!" Katara chimes. "Breakfast is ready."

Cold rice isn't exactly THE breakfast, but I don't complain. If we have to walk for a while, I'm not going to do it on an empty stomach.

"Where are we headed, anyway?"

"You'll see it once we get there," Sokka replies before anyone else can.

My shoulders slump. "Alright..." I sigh. "I'll see it once we get there."

Truce and trust may sound similar, but there are still miles to go...

* * *

 **Opinions please. As in PLEASE!**

 **I feel it might have been a bit ambitious to create such a difficult character for my first Avatar fic. I mean, it's not the first time I write a chara with a rough background, but Kamina feels different somehow. Must be the interaction with new kinds of characters. You know, as in WAR kinds of characters? That's harsh! It's amazing that the creators managed to pull it off as a series suitable for children without killing the quality. I mean, seriously! I tip my non-existent hat, I do.**

 **EDIT: Once again, a review to help me out. This time, it was from zezily. Thank you!**


	10. Tearing up

**Phew! *wipes forehead* This is a very strong chapter. Well, at least I think so, and I do hope you took warning. I didn't pick 'Angst' as a genre for nothing.**

 **And a double-meaning chapter title, because I'm a sucker for puns. Sue me.**

* * *

I don't mind walking much. There is the occasional complaint about the heat, but really, I've seen worse. It's pretty cool for a summer day.

"Come on, guys! This is nothing!" I spur everyone on, walking backwards in order to keep an eye on the rest of the group. Unsurprisingly, I'm holding the front. "Can't handle some sun? How are you planning to keep walking when noon comes round?"

"Will you just shut up for a minute?" Toph grumbles. "I can't hear myself think!"

"Thanks, Toph," Sokka deadpans. "It's not the sun _up there_ that is hard to handle."

That comment is confusing enough for me to freeze in mid-step. "Huh?"

But Aang seems to get it. "Nothing wrong with a sunny disposition, Sokka."

"Well, if this goes on, I'll get a sunburn," Toph continues and I roll my eyes to the heavens. Oh Agni, what did I kick off here?

But Aang giggles, and Katara joins in. I shake my head in disbelief and turn around, facing forward again. It's silent for a while, everyone's saving their breath.

It's very much true, though. The heat, I mean. There is barely any shrubbery around to provide some shadowy relief. Or cover, for that matter. There are walls, both hillsides and depressions, which are quite effective as such, but they also force us into a line which can't be broken out of, and right now, the sun shines in such an odd angle at us that there is no escaping its grip. Or anyone's sight who might happen to stroll around this same line. Or above.

"I really do hope we don't run into another patrol," I speak out my thoughts and slow my steps, falling back to Aang. "Why are you guys in the Fire Nation, anyway? Wouldn't it be easier for you to hide out at the Northern Water Tribe or something?"

"Uh, that's kind of my fault," Aang explains uneasily. "Let's say we've ended up at Crescent Island without really meaning to. Since then, we've been on the road."

"Right..." I'm really curious how they got to Crescent Island, but I suppose no one's going to tell me. It seems to be a sore spot for Aang, and I don't pressure him. I rack my brain for a subject to change to, and I'm very pleased with myself once I come up with something. "Hey, since we have time now, how about some firebending theory? I can walk you through it while wal... never mind."

Aang giggles, before one of his eyebrows takes a detour downwards in a mixture of skepticism and concern. "Right... I think we should do that."

Now it's my turn to be concerned. "Look, Aang, I know what you must think about firebenders and firebending. But there is nothing to be afraid of. Fire isn't inherently evil. It's danger and destruction, yes, but it's also warmth and light. Think campfire! It doesn't necessarily cause harm. There is a reason why the Fire Nation is the most advanced nation."

"Yeah, because it destroys everything else," Sokka pipes up from behind, words charged with sarcasm.

I shoot him a glare. "You're not helping!"

"She's right, Sokka," Aang interrupts matter-of-factly. Suddenly, he has everyone's attention, while he himself turns forward with a faraway look in his eyes. "The Fire Nation _is_ the most advanced. And it was even before the war. But that's not necessarily a good thing."

"What do you mean?" I ask. The Water Tribe siblings seem to know already what the little Avatar's aiming at, and Toph pretends not to care.

"Look around yourself."

I do, but I still don't get it. The landscape is marked by strip mines. Trenches, hills which were banked up by human hands. A lot of dark brown, the stray patches of grass are more of a sickly yellowish color rather than green. Well... maybe I do get it.

"You're referring to the somewhat reckless exploitation of resources, right? I've heard the Air Nomads value the preservation of nature over progress."

"Nature is not a toy." Aang is very adamant about that, that much is clear. He is tense, almost grim. "I can feel the spirit's grief everywhere."

He could have meant "the spirits grieve" just as well, but I suppose it doesn't matter. "Is that an Avatar thing?" I try to distract from the subject. "Because I don't feel anything, which either means it's Avatar stuff indeed or I'm a terrible airbender. Not that the latter would surprise me much if it were the case."

As Aang fails to answer, Sokka kindly jumps in, "It's an Avatar thing." When I direct my gaze at him, I catch him raising his hands, gesturing from one side to the other. "You know, great bridge between our world and the spirit world?"

I quirk my brows at his display. He drops his arms and stares back, somewhat offended.

"Seriously," he insists. "Get used to it. Stuff like that happens a lot."

"I'll keep it in mind."

Only now I notice that I fell back, while Katara stepped up and started talking to Aang. As far as I can tell, she's consoling him, but it seems sorta intimate so I desperately ransack my brain for another subject I could kick up with Toph or even _Sokka_. Anything not to listen in.

"So, you guys are traveling a lot, I suppose? I bet you have quite some tales to tell!"

"Sure," Toph responds with suspicions-inducing glee. "If you want to hear how we kick some serious Fire Nation butt, let me know!"

I wince, I should have seen this coming. No matter how nice those people actually are, they're still my enemies. "No, thank you very much."

I put some distance – or Appa, to be precise – between me and the rest of the group, retreating into my own thoughts. While I decided the night before that I can't dwell on the fact that I'm totally out of my depths here, it's easier said than done. I'm lucky that I haven't lost anyone I love yet. All members of my family are stationed somewhere relatively safe. In the Fire Nation itself, in the quieter colonies... But about half a year ago, Mimi's best friend Hirai lost a cousin at the North Pole, when the whole Fire Navy was wiped out by no less a person than the Avatar himself.

I already forgot about that. I never met the guy, I don't even know his name. I barely know Hirai, his parents disapprove strongly of their precious son associating with an airbender. I can't blame Mimi for letting it slip, he's known Hirai since forever and he was too young to understand. But yeah, it's impossible for me to miss Hirai's cousin in any way, so why is he sneaking into my mind _now_ of all times? It only complicates matters which are already complicated enough as they are.

I'm glad Appa's enormous body shields me from the rest of the group. I promised Sokka I won't let any harm come to Aang. Such a premature move. The urge, the _need_ to turn the little Avatar in and end this war is so overwhelming, it hurts physically. At the same time, it feels so _wrong_. Aang is so cute and adorable and good-natured and I couldn't live with myself if I sentenced him to death, or a fate even worse than that. He's a _child_ , for Agni's sake!

I squeeze my eyes shut and press a hand onto my mouth, choking back a sob. I can't cry now. It would cause uncomfortable questions at best, at worst... well, I can't judge yet what these people are capable of once they realize how weak I really am.

I'm only vaguely aware of my surroundings, I'm so busy struggling to keep my emotions under control that I neglect the rest of me. My legs are shaking, ready to give in. I can't take another step. Sounds reach my ears, muffled as if carrying through water, but they don't reach my mind.

Only a loud bellow snaps me out of it. Shock takes over, freezing my limbs and probably widening my eyes as well. Before I know it, I find myself on my knees, trembling, breathing heavily, and when I look around, there are Sokka and Katara peeking out from behind a ruffled Appa. Toph is nowhere to be seen, but I expect her behind the sky bison also. Aang for his part has materialized a few feet away from my face, just now relaxing from what appears to be a bending stance and heaving a sigh of relief.

And I break. Screw the caution, screw the self-control, screw it all! I need to cry now. All that anguish needs to flow out, be expressed and, ideally, resolved.

A hand is placed on my shoulder. "What's wrong?" Aang's voice rings out, with a hint of panic in it.

"I'm sorry," I sob quietly, wiping my eyes to no avail. The tears keep coming. "I'm sorry, Aang."

"But..." He trails off, clearly at loss for words.

"Let me handle this," Katara speaks up then, softly shooing the airbender away. I sense her squatting down in front of me, but I don't dare looking up. Just thinking about betraying Aang is unforgivable. I don't deserve their comfort.

Katara waits for me to calm down, resting a hand on my shoulder. I'm thankful for the silence, I certainly don't want anyone to ask "Are you okay?" when I'm clearly not, and she seems to understand that.

Once I'm somewhat back in control and my brain starts to work again, however, she asks gently, "Do you want to tell me what upsets you so much?"

I shake my head, still not trusting my voice.

"I know it's confusing right now," Katara continues. "You're torn between the loyalty to your country and the loyalty to your friends. I understand. And I'm sorry that I can't offer a solution right away, but I'm sure we can figure it out."

"You have no idea..." I croak, a fresh load of tears welling up. "I don't... I should have never..." I trail off, unable to form a coherent sentence. I wipe my eyes and take a deep breath. "I shouldn't be here."

"Don't think like that. You know, I believe it's meant to be this way."

"I don't," I respond tiredly. The tears finally stopped running and my voice became steadier. Now, I just want to lie down and take a long, long nap, after which I would wake up in my bed and all this stuff would never have happened. "I'm sure destiny wouldn't choose someone like me for something so grand."

"What makes you think so?"

I sigh. Now that I'm over the crying part, I'm starting to feel slightly annoyed. Do I have to spell it out? "Because..." _Because I'm just me_ , which is probably not the reason Katara wants to hear. "Never mind..."

"Come on," the Water Tribe girl encourages gently. With the rustling of clothes, she gets up and an outstretched hand enters my vision. Numbly, I take it and let Katara pull me to my feet, which causes me to meet her gaze more or less by accident. She smiles mildly, and I can't help smiling back. I feel better the very instant.

"Thank you, Katara."

"It's okay." She let's go of my hand, only to grip them both and add, "You'll be okay."

"You keep saying that," I tell her, doubt worming its way back into my mind. "But optimistic words aren't going to fix anything."

"You won't believe what optimistic words can do," Katara plainly shoots the notion down and I knit my brows at her, but I don't comment. I guess I'll just take her optimistic words for it.

"Right..."

I jerk my hands free and turn around. I can't tell her about how a part of me wants to turn Aang in so badly, especially within the hearing range of Sokka. They won't understand anyway. To them, the Fire Nation is evil. That I wish for this war to end just as passionately as they do will probably fall on deaf ears.

"Hey."

Aang's face appears in my line of sight. He even bends his knees to meet my lowered gaze. I flinch back half a step, I've never seen anyone behave like this around me, and it creeps me out. That I almost trip over Katara and make her catch my shoulders doesn't help matters.

"Careful there!" she scolds lightly, clearly amused.

"Sorry," I mumble and turn back to Aang, raising my brows at his serious expression. "What is it?"

"You see me as an enemy, don't you?" he half states, half asks and instantly, my head explodes with contradictory responses. I bite down on my lip, I'm sure everyone can hear my pounding heart, so I will it to calm down.

Katara's hands on my shoulders have tensed up, I can feel it through the fabric of my tunic. Both Sokka and Toph have crossed their arms, the former looking distrustful, the latter intent, as if listening to something only she can hear. Aang appears increasingly downcast, which is what shocks me most. I've gotta do something about it, and fast!

"No, it's not that!" I yelp, not really caring what I say as long as it makes him feel better. Then I manage to pull my act together, dropping my gaze in the process. "I mean... I'm just really confused, okay? Don't worry, I'm not going to turn you in or anything, it's just... my brother's best friend lost a family member at the North Pole," I add on a whim, feeling I need to give at least _some_ explanation for my breakdown. "Just... give me some time to come to terms with the fact that I accidentally befriended his..." I trail off. I can't just say _killer_ , I refuse to apply it to Aang. But I feel the word floating in the air anyway. The tension is palpable.

"I never wanted it."

I look up, alarmed at the sorrow and remorse in Aang's voice. The little Avatar is staring at his toes, and I can make out a telltale glistening in his eyes. Aang is on the verge of bursting into tears himself!

Before I know it, Katara is gone from my side and rushes to his, pulling him into a tight embrace. "It's not your fault, Aang," she comforts him softly, causing a question mark to pop into my mind.

It's not?

"I know," the little Avatar mumbles, the voice steadier than I expected, but the tears unmistakably resonating in it. I still have no idea how the comprehensive sinking of the Fire Navy is supposed to be not his fault, but looking at Aang's trembling form, I find myself believing it. Which makes me feel sorry for ever bringing it up, however, if I tried to comfort him myself, I'd probably mess it up. So I just leave it to Katara, and instead gather my shattered courage. It takes a few seconds, a couple deep breaths and silent self-persuasion, but once done, I grab Sokka's wrist and drag him in Appa's direction.

"Hey! What...?!"

I keep going til we're on the other side of the sky bison, hidden from Aang, Katara and... no, not Toph, actually. When I release Sokka, he looks at me accusingly.

"You know, _you_ were supposed to cut me off. Like, with a 'Shut up!', so everyone can see you're an inconsiderate jerk?"

He says it so matter-of-factly that I lose composure for a moment and start waving my arms frantically. "What?! I'm not... Alright, anyway!" I decide that I stumbled over my own tongue often enough for today. "Listen, I didn't mean to hurt Aang like that, I was just trying to clear some things up so you guys don't get the wrong ideas. This is a very sticky situation I'm in right now... but I digress." I take a deep breath, my words have become increasingly hectic – a fact Sokka honors with a raised brow. "Sorry. What I'm trying to say is... Will you tell me what exactly had happened at the North Pole?"

Sokka crosses his arms and leans against the wall of the trench we happen to be in right now. His brows are furrowed, but not in an angry kind of way, more like... sullen? I'd almost call it grief-stricken.

"It's not a good memory."

* * *

 **I used to be very good at Humor (if I do say so myself). But lately, I've been writing so much Angst that I can't pull off proper jokes anymore! T.T**

 **I discovered a tumblr post with English synonyms for 'say', sorted by conveyed emotion, and I was like, _I found a treasure box!_ *.***

 **Yeah, that's the kind of stuff that makes me happy. I mean, I read a lot of English books and try to get the words from my passive vocabulary into the active bunch, but well... English is not my mother tongue, can't be helped. I'll keep trying. ^-^**

 **So, this turned out longer than expected. So much about sticking with 2k, this one is like 2.8k (without A/N). Well, I don't really care one way or another, what happens, happens. Hope you enjoyed~**


	11. Part of a Pack

**Hah, sweet motivation! I feel I'm on a roll! Let's hope it doesn't end here, though.**

* * *

I doubt I got the exact account, the story Sokka tells me has holes so big Appa could fly straight through them. But I guess the point is that Aang is indeed not responsible for sinking the Fire Navy. Well, most of it anyway. The biggest part of the fleet was destroyed by the Ocean Spirit, who just so happened to need an Avatar as a medium to channel his power. And Admiral Zhao killed the Moon Spirit, which is why we had a lunar eclipse back in the day. My family didn't even notice, they were all fast asleep, while I had one of my regular cases of insomnia. I ended up watching the lunar eclipse through my roof window. It was pretty crazy, I was so excited about what I had seen that I didn't sleep all night. I was so dozy the next day that even Hide couldn't bother me. Blissful semi-sleep...

The Moon Spirit was revived. That's one of the holes on which Sokka wouldn't elaborate upon. It's just alive. But, oh well, spirits just work differently than humans do, so why not?

Long story short: Aang can't control the Avatar State. It controls _him_ , and that's actually pretty scary if you think about it. I can't imagine carrying such an enormous power around which is out for the blood of everyone who threatens me or my friends. (Friends... I still can't believe it. Friendship is such a _strange_ concept to me...) Awful huge responsibility. If I were the Avatar, I suppose the first victim would be Hide. And while I loathe his presence down to the last fiber of my being, I don't wish death upon him. Maybe a broken bone or two, but I'm not bloodthirsty enough for more. And Aang is a freaking _pacifist_ , if his statement about violence not being the answer is anything to go by.

"Sounds like something straight out of an adventure story..." I ponder, more to myself rather than Sokka. "I might even enjoy it if my nation wasn't on the losing side..." I shake that depressing notion off and direct my attention back at the Water Tribe boy. I bow. "Thank you, Sokka. It clarifies a lot." I'm yet to see whether it helps me solve this puzzle or scrambles it up even more, however.

There is a slight hesitation, but then Sokka replies, "No problem."

I wonder whether he accepts me as a friend by now, but I don't ask. If I'm honest with myself, I don't really wanna know. I'd rather remain uncertain about it than knowing the answer and disliking it.

I'm snapped out of my thoughts when the ground suddenly starts shaking. Sokka immediately slides into a more solid stance and stays on his feet, while yours truly with her insubstantial earthquake experience promptly loses balance. Of course, now that I could actually use it for once, my wild airbending decides to stab me in the back and forgoes the activation. And my tailbone weeps.

"Toph!" Sokka barks, identifying the culprit as the tiny girl who strolls into view like she has all the rights in the world to jolt us like that.

"If you two are done snuggling, can we get a move on?" she rants, voice dripping with sarcasm. "There is a forest up ahead and I really need a break from this heat. So whatever you were doing, do it _there_!"

My first reaction is bewilderment, the second... not so much. A hatred I didn't know I'm capable of floods through my veins. Now that I'm finally rid of Hide, I refuse to be pushed around by a dirty Earth Kingdom preteen. (And _Agni_ , dirty she is. Does she ever take a bath?)

I grit my teeth and climb to my feet, ready to stomp into Toph's direction and give her an earful of I-don't-know-yet-it'll-surely-come-to-me, but I barely get past Sokka – a hand clasps around my wrist, causing me to look over my shoulder where the Water Tribe boy slowly shakes his head. I can almost hear him say, _Leave it. It's not worth the effort._

Okay, let's take this incident like a mature and civil person. I breathe deeply and relax my shoulders, signaling that it's safe to let me go now. I'm totally calm while walking over to Toph.

"You know, it's not very nice to bend the earth away from people's feet."

"Oh, sorry." She cups her face in her hands and I know I've made a mistake. "I didn't know that our delicate Fireflake can't handle some dirt."

I admit it, I'm lacking an adequate retort. To tell the truth, I'm lacking the _anger_. Toph calling me a fire flake throws me so artfully off track that the insult just fails to match up.

My subsequent "What..." is probably the flattest What in the history of flat Whats. All the rage has drained away and another emotion is yet to fill the void.

I don't know if people are born with the innate knowledge of facial expressions and able to invoke them even when blind, but from the way Toph knits her brows and places a hand on her hip, I'd claim she's been caught off-guard and doesn't like the feeling.

"Okay, now what was that?" she asks warily, causing me to run a hand through my hair.

"Uuuuh..." I drawl with about the eloquence of a drunken komodo rhino. How do I explain that? "You know, you sort of reminded me of that one guy I really can't stand, and by that I mean I'd happily push him over the edge of a cliff if I got the chance, just so you can fathom the dimensions of my hatred just now, but then you called me a fire flake, what he wouldn't even dream of doing because that would mean admitting that we're actually the same people, so he usually calls me airhead, which I wouldn't recommend to you unless you want me to hate your guts and provide Katara with another comforting job..."

"Get to the point!" Toph interrupts testily, and only then I notice that I've been rambling on without even completing one sentence. Great, now I'm abusing multi-clauses already. What's next?

"Alright, sorry. I guess what I'm trying to say is... I won't push you off a cliff if you keep calling me Fireflake." I'd actually sort of like it, but I'm not sure if it would be healthy to say that out loud.

"Ha!" Toph cackles. "It wouldn't do you any good anyway!"

"I suppose..." Pushing earthbenders off a cliff is probably futile, seeing how they can use the cliff itself for catching and everything...

I can't help a small smile. Katara said I have to take Toph's antics with humor. Well, I can't tell where we'll be going from here, that one certainly was about to blow up big time. Except that it didn't. Hmm... Complicated.

"Alright ladies, let's get going before the next waterworks open up," Sokka ushers Toph and me back to Katara and Aang's side of the bison.

I roll my eyes. Way to remind me of my outburst. "You're hilarious," I deadpan, but Sokka can't be bothered.

"Yeah, it's a gift," he comments with a smugness which should be outlawed, but I find myself grinning nonetheless. _That_ is the sort of antics I can take with humor no prob!

Then I catch sight of Aang, and before I can decide whether I want to talk to him or not, my evil evil feet are already running up to him.

"Are you alright? Look, I didn't mean to..." I launch into another monologue. That is, until the ground shifts beneath my feet. "Whoa!" I exclaim and windmill my arms to keep balance. Aang helpfully creates a funnel of air to stabilize my foothold and I can glare at Toph, who of course doesn't even notice. However, Katara stomps over to her in my stead ("Would you control yourself for once? That was kind of important!" "Come on, Katara, we all know she's sorry, and we don't need a lengthy speech about it!"), so I'm free to shake my head and direct my gaze back at Aang, sighing. "Awful nice if you'd teach me in the near future."

He grins broadly at that. "Sure! Actually, let's start right away!"

"Yeah, let's do that."

I find myself a lot less enthusiastic about learning to airbend than I expected, but now that I think about it... Actually, it shouldn't come as a surprise. When have I ever been enthusiastic about airbending?

"Alright!" Aang begins as soon as we are walking once more. And then, he babbles away in a manner which totally fails to get anything to stick around my mind. Something about circles and spirits and avoiding fights, not necessarily in that order. Now I understand why Toph is so bothered by people to whom punctuation is a foreign concept.

But because I'm civilized, I don't interrupt or blast Aang over. I do try to listen, but I catch myself zoning out more often than not. Luckily, the forest Toph has been talking about isn't far away and about a mile and a half in, a glittering surface is parting the trees.

Katara spots it first. "A river!" she calls out, elation evident in her voice.

Aang instantly joins in, "A river? That's great!"

I breathe a sigh of relief as the boy runs ahead and... promptly starts undressing?!

Alright, that's not so bad, I've seen Mimi before. Can't be that different. Aang doesn't seem old enough to have anything worth ogling.

Yeah, right.

Turns out, Aang is worth ogling indeed, though not in the guttermind sense of the word. By the time he's peeled off his school uniform, the rest of us has caught up, and I can admire the little Avatar in all his arrowed glory. Air Nomad kid...

"Nice tattoos," I state before anyone can get the wrong idea as to why I feel the need to stare at a boy in his underwear. "Do those have any significant meaning?"

Aang frowns. "I just explained that. Weren't you listening?"

Oh... Now that's embarrassing. "Uh..." I mumble with burning face. "Sorry..."

"Frankly, Twinkletoes," Toph chips in. I didn't even notice her stepping up to us... but wait, _Twinkletoes_? I suppress a snicker. That's actually pretty funny. "You may want to tone down on that bubbliness. I get that you're all excited and over the moon because you're not the last airbender anymore, but seeing how eagerly you assault Fireflaky over here with information, I really can't blame her for losing focus."

Aang seems totally flustered by the revelation. He turns his widened eyes from Toph to me and asks incredulously, "Why didn't you say anything?"

I chuckle. That may sound weird, but Aang is adorable when he's being a dork. "Because you seemed so happy talking about your bending that I didn't have the heart to interrupt you."

Loud whooping saves Aang from responding. "Waterbending bomb!" sounds Katara's voice (Did she just jump out of a tree?!) and a splash higher than nature allows soaks us innocent bystanders to the bones. I want to share a morose look with Toph, only that the Earth Kingdom girl isn't exactly big on sharing looks. And I don't even have to try Aang.

"Hey, don't start without me!" the little Avatar protests and turns around to jump after Katara, giving me a clear view of his back. And what I see is _staggering_.

Burned red flesh covers the center of the little Avatar's back with a nasty-looking scar. It's shocking to behold. It doesn't look like a superficial wound, either, in fact, it looks a lot more like a deep and very much fatal injury. After all, we're talking about the spine here, how is the rest of him undamaged?!

Oh Agni, that must have _hurt_...

The daze is broken when Appa lows, and I cringe in sympathy. I should have seen it coming. After all, Aang is the Avatar and pretty much every Fire Nation citizen is out to kill him. He's bound to have burn scars, but... a kid? How atrocious is that?

Aang fails to notice my dismay. He is about to take off when he freezes in mid-movement, then proceeds by turning to his sky bison companion. "Sorry buddy." He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, then he scurries to Appa's side and bends the saddle off the animal. Momo (I remember the name, yes!), who's been napping in said saddle the last hour or so, chitters resentfully at being woken and goes right back to sleep as soon as the saddle comes to rest on the ground. The bison, on the other hand, plunges into the river with a joyful bellow. Good thing I'm drenched already...

I pull myself together. I suppose it won't hurt to follow their example. Considering the heat, the river actually looks pretty tempting, and I could use the distraction. So I extract myself from my wet clothes and hang them over a tree branch to dry. Sokka has disappeared somewhere, perhaps hitting the bush?

Alright, never mind. Jumping in a wide arc, I dive headfirst into the current – and it's _awesome_. The water clears my head in the soothing way only water does. It feels like I'm cleansed right down to the soul; the doubts, the burning questions cooled down and washed away. Which idiot was it again who claimed that fire is the superior element? Water is amazing!

My head breaks through the surface, and I'm already feeling guilty for the sentiment. Like I betrayed the Fire Nation. Like I betrayed a part of _my own self_.

But I don't get the time to mope. Aang waves to me and calls out, "Whoever dives farther wins!"

"Hey!" I protest, but the little Avatar has already disappeared beneath the surface. Ambition takes over, I suck in as much air as I can handle and submerge, kicking the water with all my strength.

I recognize a blurry Aang pelting through the clear water up ahead, but try as I might, I can't catch up. Well, I don't need to. I only have to swim further before going up for air.

My oxygen supply lasts me about nine minutes, but Aang doesn't show any signs of resurfacing. My chest starts to hurt. Dark spots are dancing in front of my eyes, things are getting hairy now, but it only serves to spark the real competitiveness. Now more than ever!

It takes me another three minutes and dimming vision to admit my defeat. I shoot up and gasp for air, my aching lungs refilling in at least a dozen shuddering breaths, which soon enough overlap with the panting of someone else. Aang's head pokes out of the water about twenty feet away.

"No fair!" I wail as soon as my lungs permit. "You're the Avatar!"

Aang paddles over to me, grinning smugly. "I didn't use waterbending."

"But you're a trained airbender!"

Aang just keeps grinning from ear to ear. "That's right, and you put up an amazing fight! I wanted to see what you can do. You've been practicing, don't you?"

I shift my gaze away, treading absentmindedly on the spot to stay above the water. "It was sort of the easiest, you know?" I mumble, feeling ashamed that I can't offer anything beyond that. "Just breathing... Nobody notices when I just dunk my head into the bathtub for a while."

"I see..." Aang replies sympathetically, grin melting into a pained expression. "Must have been agonizing to hide your bending all these years."

I shrug indifferently. "You get used to it. Besides, my family doesn't really mind. They don't like it, of course, but my parents would just ground me if they caught me practicing. Which isn't much of a punishment since I spend most of my time at home anyway."

I only notice that I lost the little Avatar halfway when he starts sputtering, "Punishment?!"

I direct my gaze back at him, meeting eyes which are widened with horror. His mouth is agape, too.

I narrow my eyes, slightly annoyed now. Why won't he get that I don't care? "You may want to haul in your jaw," I comment sarcastically. "And I told you it wasn't much of a punishment anyway."

Aang visibly calms down, finally closing his mouth. "But it's still wrong," he maintains his viewpoint. "You shouldn't be punished for doing something you were born to do!"

I raise a hand out of the water and flick the airbender's arrowed forehead. He grunts an "Ow!" and rubs the offended skin.

"Welcome to reality, little Avatar."

"You know, sometimes I really hate reality," he replies surly and I shrug again.

"You're not alone with that sentiment. Come on, let's return to the others! I'm sure they're wondering what's taking us so long, and seeing how we're ten minutes downriver, swimming back will take a while."

I twist and kick in my place until I'm facing upriver, where Appa is nothing more than a dot at the horizon. My arms hurt at the mere thought of challenging the current.

"Alright," Aang agrees behind me. I shriek with surprise when I suddenly find myself on all fours atop a translucent platform. While I've never seen ice before (well, I did, when Aang built that rice cooler, but it was dark and I couldn't really appreciate it), it's not hard to identify it as such. It looks just the way I imagined!

A joyful chuckle escapes me and I run a hand over the smooth, cold surface. Seems like I don't have to swim back after all!

"Hang on, Kamina!" Aang shouts. Before I can finish admiring the ice, the little Avatar sweeps back his arms and we zoom across the river. The jolt throws me off-balance and I flop to my belly, but Aang is too busy laughing to notice me clinging to the floe's edge for dear life. And I have to admit, once I get used to the speed, I can't stop myself from whooping along with him.

This isn't so bad, actually...

* * *

 **Not that angsty this time... I figured I should grant Kami and the rest of the Gaang a little break. ^-^**

 **Besides, I want to write Aang teaching. I think he's the overzealous kind of teacher, excited to share the knowledge of his people to the point that he needs to be knocked down a peg or two. Too bad Kami isn't exactly receptive, poor Aang pretty much ran into a brick wall with her...**

 **Anyway, I'm officially out now. Good day!**


	12. Correcting Prejudice

**Uhm... not on a roll. More of a roll than with other stories, but well...**

* * *

We stay at the riverside for another while. Katara tries to coax Toph into bathing, but the Earth Kingdom girl stays where she is, lounging in the shadows of the trees. So she really doesn't bathe. Yuck! She even shamelessly picks her nose. Double yuck!

Note to self: Don't get near Toph unless absolutely necessary! Good thing Katara's Waterbending Bomb has splashed her. It's not perfect, but a start. Hmm... Wait a minute...

Preparing for evil, I get up from my resting spot in the shallower shore area and position myself so I face Toph. Then I take a deep breath, lower myself into the water so my mouth is _just_ beneath the surface, and blow.

I can't create waves that way (not yet, anyways), but I can create spray. Toph jumps at the coldness, and she is not amused.

"Katara!" she yells, immediately suspecting the waterbender of the deed. Something of a logical conclusion, actually.

Katara, by the time totally engrossed in practicing with Aang, stops her whirlpooling or whatever move it is supposed to be and turns around.

"What is it, Toph?" she asks exasperatedly, probably annoyed at being interrupted in such a rude manner.

"You know exactly what it is!" the earthbender fumes.

"No, I don't."

Finally regaining my composure (I wanted to tease Toph a bit, not make her argue with Katara), I speak up, "Katara doesn't have anything to do with it!"

"Yeah," Aang joins the court of defense. "We've been training, and we didn't even look at you."

There is a splash and I turn to the source. It's Sokka, standing a few feet off and watching. He seems to be enjoying the show.

Toph crosses her arms. "Well, since leaves transforming into rain clouds is a rather rare event, I'm pretty sure one of you is responsible for it!"

"Yes guys, it was me!" I explain, rolling my eyes. Seriously, getting a word in in this group appears to be hard work. "Toph, water is not a hazardous substance! Take a bath, for Agni's sake! You're dirty all over!"

I guess, in a staring contest, Toph has the upper hand by default. For a blind girl, she's pretty good at glowering. The problem is, when I glower back, it's no reason for worry.

"Katara, please introduce our new member to the ways of the greatest earthbender."

Katara rolls her eyes. "Toph can't swim, so every time we try to get her to bathe, she thinks we're trying to assassinate her."

Toph continues to glower. Katara adopts an expression I'd almost call sardonic if it weren't for the fact that she's _Katara_.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" the Water Tribe girl... _articulates_ with thinly veiled sarcasm, hands folded in a gesture of apology. "Of course I meant to say:" Her tone shifts to indicate imitation. " _You call it dirt. I call it a healthy coating of earth._ "

I raise a brow at the statement. "Right..." Triple yuck. And _man_ , I didn't expect Katara to have dark side capabilities! Surprise, surprise!

Aang looks decidedly uncomfortable. "Uhm, guys? Would you please stop going all sarcastic on Toph's bathing habits?"

"Relax, Aang!" Sokka decides to put his two copper pieces in, making a sort of swishing outward motion with his hands. "No one is going sarcastic on Toph's bathing habits. Right, ladies?"

He sends meaningful glances Katara's and my way, his cheery voice betraying the underlying... you guessed it, _sarcasm_. I share a look with Katara as well, and I'm pretty sure now about what is going through our three heads.

 _Of course we're not sarcastic about Toph's bathing habits. How would we do that? She doesn't have any._

"Right," Katara confirms.

"Totally," I agree.

Toph blows at a strand hanging into her face and settles back against a tree, miffed. I suppose we'll pay for those quips later, once we're out of the water. I wonder if Toph can bend the mud beneath my feet? Uh, blind earthbenders... Not even 24 hours and I'm already growing paranoid. But since she couldn't identify me before, maybe the... view? Maybe the view is too squishy? That doesn't even make sense! ARGH, my head is exploding!

Alright, just to be on the safe side, I'll take another swim where my feet don't touch the ground of the river. A bit off the group, I turn onto my back and float around a bit, enjoying the tranquility and the warmth of the sun on my face, thinking about Hide sitting in school right now and chafing at the fact that I'm not there for him to pick on and do his homework.

I sigh raptly. This is the life.

* * *

"KAMINA!"

"KYAAAAH!"

I'm not sure if I actually dozed off, or if Aang skipped the indoor voice approach, or both. Fact is that I start flailing like mad until I finally manage to catch myself and even out.

I heave a deep breath. "Turtle whiskers, Aang! You gave me a heart attack!"

"Sorry," he says, grinning sheepishly. "Anyway, Katara, Sokka, Toph and me agreed that we should move on."

"Oh, okay," I shrug. "Let's go then. I'll be the last one to stand in the way."

It is only when we're paddling back to the riverbank that I realize Aang has asked for my opinion on continuing our trip. I'm a bit surprised. I wonder what would have happened if I told him I want to stay another while? Not that I do, I don't really care one way or another.

I scramble up the shore and I'm just about to go get my clothes when an earth pillar juts out from beneath my feet. I screech in shock as I'm catapulted right back into the river. Sputtering and disheveled, I stand up in the knee-deep water. The shore is empty of people save for a gaping Aang and a very smug Toph.

"What was that for?" I demand, noticing movement from the corner of my eye. Sokka and Katara have been subjected to the same fate, and it dawns on me.

"Oh, sorry!" Toph calls patronizingly. "Did you fall into the river? I bet you're feeling a bit put out now, Flame Princess. Good thing water is not a hazardous substance."

"Uhm, Toph..." Aang tries to intervene, then trails off. No idea what Katara and Sokka are doing, I'm busy massaging my temples. I guess I deserved that. I mean, me not being exactly satisfied with her lacking hygiene doesn't give me the right to take advantage of her blindness and startle her.

I sigh, dropping my gaze to stare at the water surface. "I'm sorry, Toph."

"What?!" the girl exclaims, half annoyed, half confused. Do all of them react like that to apologies?

And thus, I elaborate, "I shouldn't have sprayed you, and I certainly shouldn't have went on to tease you about it."

"Uhm, Fireflake?" Toph inquires, sounding... worried? "Are you in there?"

"Leave it, Toph," Sokka dryly cuts in before I can react properly. I get to raise my head, though. "We have two airbenders spouting random apologies now. Get used to it."

"Random apologies?" Aang repeats incredulously and slightly indignant. No one bothers with an answer.

The Water Tribe siblings trudge out of the river. When I see that they don't come flying back, I assume it's safe to follow them and traipse after Sokka, who happens to have his clothes stored near mine.

I'm not sure what's gotten into me to make me stop dead halfway and stare at the Water Tribe boy dressing himself. I've been so busy with Aang and Toph that I never noticed... Oh Agni, Sokka is _hot_! Tall, with that exotic complexion of his and muscles in all the right places... Wait, what? Brain, stop it! Hormones, shoo!

Cursing puberty under my breath, I force my feet to move and stomp over to the tree with my clothes. Normally, I would be reluctant to pull dry pants over damp underwear, but right now, I couldn't care less. I'm so embarrassed! I hope nobody saw that. Me, taking a liking to a snow savage's physique! I would never be able to live it down if anyone found out!

Thankfully, the moment is over soon enough. I spot Katara using a comb and jump at the chance to redo my braid. It has loosened considerably and already started to resemble a boarcupine.

The comb is of a light blue color, Water Tribe style. I never would have guessed that the water folks actually use combs. It bespeaks an understanding of hygiene I was taught to be non-existent at the poles.

I wonder what else of the things I believe to know about the other nations has been distorted. What I believe to know about my _own_ nation has been distorted. Am I lucky that the truth is slowly revealing itself to me? Would it have been better for me to spend the rest of my life in ignorance and grow into a loyal Fire Nation citizen? Does it matter?

I return the comb to Katara. I feel numb and at loss, deeply at loss. I love my country. I love being Fire Nation, the power, the pride. While I never really felt like I belong, it's still my home. My people.

Am I loving a lie?

"Are you okay?" Katara asks. My discomfort must be showing, but I can't get myself to give a flaming fig.

I turn away and shake my head. "I just don't know what's right or wrong anymore..."

A hand is placed on my shoulder. "That's okay. You'll find out."

"You don't understand," I mumble and sweep the hand away, ordering myself to face Katara again. Doesn't work. My eyes prefer the river. "All my life, I've been taught that the other nations are somehow inferior, especially the Water Tribes. I always had that vague idea of an unkempt savage dressed in greasy furs, hunting seals with a spear made from bones, and eating raw meat and communicating in grunts rather than language." I laugh bitterly. "Can you believe it? And it doesn't stop there. I was taught that the Air Nomad genocide was justified. I was taught that the Air Nomads were so weak that it was offensive. I was taught they were so backward they'd pull humankind into the Dark Ages if let loose. I was taught to hate them." _I was taught to hate myself_ , I want to add, but that's beside the point and I'm coming off whiny enough as it is. "The only nation which came off lightly is the Earth Kingdom. Stubborn, steadfast, _human_. But dirty. Toph pretty much embodies the stereotype. But the rest of you? Look at you guys. You're civilized. You're smart enough to hide an Avatar and a flying fluff monster in the middle of the Fire Nation. I mean, Sokka's machete is not from steel, and I'm pretty sure the same goes for his club. But they work anyway. It's not bad to make do with what you've got, you seem to be very creative folks to me. And Aang... he's so strong, actually. He's the Avatar, sure, but beyond that... He's lost his people. He was ripped from his peaceful life and thrown into a war-torn world. He's carrying so much hurt, and yet he enjoys life. Me, on the other hand, I haven't lost anyone I care about. I'm lucky. I live in the nation I was taught to be superior to all. I should be proud and confident." I sigh. My shoulders slump, I lower my gaze to the ground, feeling very uncomfortable after my rant. "I can't even look at the people I'm talking to. I'm Fire Nation, and yet I'm the weakest of us all. My whole world is shattered and I have no idea what to do with the shards."

"Rebuild," Katara suggests gently, taking my hands. Surprisingly, I don't feel the urge to pull back. "Come on, look at me," she sorta orders. I don't really feel like complying, but I do it anyway. Katara smiles mildly, understanding in her eyes. No senseless pity. Understanding.

"I'd be happy to tell you about the Water Tribes," she continues. "Sokka is a bit paranoid, but you can ask him, too. Toph might be a bit of a problem, but don't be afraid to try. And as you have noticed already, Aang shares his knowledge with great zeal."

A smile tugs at my lips when I remember the look on the kid's face after Toph remarked on his babbling. It doesn't break through, and before I know it, I find myself staring at my shoes again.

"What if I listen to you and... turn around? I don't want to think about it, but technically, we're enemies. You don't have good things to say about my home." I squeeze Katara's hands, maybe a bit too tightly. "What if I end up hating the Fire Nation? I'm scared of the possibility. My life would never be the same again."

 _They poison the love we feel for our country._ Mum, you've been so right.

"Kamina, I'm sorry to say this, but..."

"It's too late, anyway," I finish her sentence. This time, I do pull back. "I've already seen too much. I can't go back to where I was."

I should be upset, but I'm not. It all seems so unreal, like a dream. Like I can flip a switch and everything would revert back to normal.

"No Kamina, listen to me." Katara's voice is still soothing, though a frantic undertone has ratweaseled itself into it. "When I talked about Aang's knowledge, I meant his love for the Fire Nation, too."

I falter at that. "What? Why would Aang...?" I can't even finish the question. It sounds ridiculous!

"Aang was born before the war," Katara explains. "He used to have friends in the Fire Nation. And the way he talks about his experiences leaves no doubts about it. I'm sure he'd love to tell you everything he remembers."

That somehow makes it all the more tragic. For Aang, I mean. But it seems there is still some hope left for me.

"Thank you, Katara. And I'm sorry I made you listen to Fire Nation propaganda."

I trip over my own words once I realize what I just said. Propaganda? Is that what it boils down to?

"It's okay," Katara promptly snaps me out of it. "I'm happy to help."

Her smile gets the best of me and I find myself hugging the Water Tribe girl briefly, but infinitely grateful. How comes she always knows what to say?

"You're the best!"

She smiles, silently accepting the compliment. Maybe I'm going a bit overemotional here, but I haven't had a friend in a long, long while. It just feels so _refreshing_!

"Come on!" Katara points over her shoulder to Appa. "Let's get going."

* * *

 **I keep forgetting things I want to say...**

 **So, last chapter... I don't know how you guys felt about Kami being able to stay underwater for 12 minutes (and Aang even longer), and I wanted to ask. I researched the world record on holding your breath, and I found out about that one diver guy who can stay underwater for 22 minutes. I also found out that you can hold your breath longer when underwater, because reflexes.**

 **Right, and there is something about this one as well... Right, Kami's attraction to Sokka! It's more of a meta thing, kudos for those who noticed. It's not a romantic subplot, at least not one I plan. (Sorry, romance lovers! ... Okay, _that_ pun I didn't intend.) It's a jab at the fact that Sokka gets them all. Yue, Suki, Toph, Ty Lee... Must be a Water Tribe thing.**

 **And Agni and the turtle whiskers, yup. Agni is Sanskrit for fire and a fire deity in Hinduism. In fanon, he's the guardian spirit of the Fire Nation, much like Tui and La in canon are for the Water Tribe. He's seen so often in fanfiction that some fans actually believe the guy to be canon, I noticed, which is mostly why I wanted to go with "High Dragons" for this story. However, I noticed it sounds awkward at times, because it's quite long. I came to appreciate Agni. I decided to use both, depending on which one sounds better.  
Turtle whiskers is nothing remarkable, actually. I wanted something to parallel Aang's favorite obscenity, "monkey feathers", though I keep wondering if it's something unique to Master Glow It Up. No one else swears in that fashion. Actually, I can't remember even one instance when someone apart from Aang swears _at all_.**

 **So, I think that was it for now. Peace out, and don't run with your spears!**


	13. Let's Meditate!

**And back here. I feel so fast these days! I had two thirds of this chapter down the very day after I posted the last one. And then I spent three days researching on a subject which turned out irrelevant for this chapter. Yeah, very smooth, but I'll be sure to use the knowledge in later chapters.**

* * *

After our little river adventure, we continue on Appa. Katara and Aang use the river to throw up a fog cover and we go on pretending to be a cloud again until we're high enough to relax. Aang has stretched out on Appa's head, Momo on his back. Toph picks her nose, which I pretend not to see. Katara is reading a scroll, while Sokka is poring over a map of the Fire Nation, determining our route.

I have nothing to do. Being all damp, I start to shiver pretty quickly.

"Flying is cold," I remark, just to break the silence. I wonder if it would help any to get rid of my pants. But with the actual problem being my underwear, I suppose it doesn't really matter.

"What do you mean?" Katara asks. "It's not cold at all."

"Well, you're not wet! Unlike some other certain people I don't have an extra set of clothes to change into!"

Katara laughs and puts her scroll down. "You should have said something!" She raises her hands and a stream of water pops out of my clothes. Katara bends it overboard in a form of spray which joins with the clouds beneath us. "Better now?"

"Yeah, thanks a ton!" I hug myself and rub my upper arms, wishing for longer sleeves. "Still cold, though."

"Oh, come on!" Sokka complains, not even looking up from his map. "It's summer, it's warm, what could you possibly miss?"

"Hey, I'm not from the North Pole, okay?"

"Well, neither am I," Sokka comments absentmindedly, but still with that certain snark to his voice that seems to be his usual modus operandi. I cock my head at Katara, who appears a bit more receptive.

"We're from the Southern Water Tribe," she explains, throwing me for a loop.

"The Southern...? But..." I point at Katara, my mind sampling bits and pieces of information and ultimately waving the red **Can't be true!** banner. "But you're a waterbender! The army... Oh..." I trail off, my face heating up with shame as Katara's eyes narrow dangerously. Way to drop the brick, Kami! "I'm sorry."

Katara rubs her forehead with the heel of her hand, eyes closed. It makes her look startlingly vulnerable.

"Look, I didn't mean to..."

"It's alright," Katara firmly chips in, her tone declaring pretty much the opposite and smothering any further conversation. I fall silent, dumbstruck. Well, I better keep my mouth shut for a while. It seems like every time I open it, I may as well put my foot in right away.

"Hey!" I can hear Aang exclaim suddenly. He sounds like he's just been struck by genius. He comes floating into the saddle, disturbing Momo in the process. The lemur chitters resentfully and opts for Katara instead, who has picked up her scroll again to resume her studies.

"If you're cold, it's the perfect opportunity to start learning," Aang cheers, dropping in front of me with his legs crossed. "Airbenders can warm themselves with proper breathing technique."

Breathing technique? "You mean like the Breath of Fire!" I grin broadly, pleased with actually finding something familiar.

Aang looks skeptical, though. His eyes shift to the side, betraying discomfort. My elation deflates.

"Wrong?"

"I'm not sure," Aang replies cautiously. "I don't think it's the same."

"Alright..." I concede hesitantly, catching myself averting my gaze again. Gotta change that – I look up. "So, what do you want me to do?"

The little Avatar rubs the back of his head. "For starters, let's try concentrating on your breathing first. Can you do the lotus position?"

I shift uneasily. "Not really. I've been practicing, but... No, not yet."

Now it's Aang's turn to visibly deflate. "Oh. Okay," he mumbles dejectedly and my heart breaks at the sight. I hate to disappoint.

"I'm sorry, Aang."

"Don't be." He takes a deep breath and relaxes, the usual smile returning to his features. "It's alright. Actually, I barely use the lotus position myself. It's a bit hard to maintain, admittedly." He grins sheepishly. "Maybe we can practice it together one day. But for now, let's use the half lotus instead!"

"Half lotus?" I repeat questioningly, eyebrows furrowed.

"My current position," Aang explains, upbeat. He's over the disappointment and clearly enjoys himself now, and it influences my own mood, too. I smile at him before I examine his legs. One of it lies on the saddle in all its length, the other is placed on top of it, with the foot resting on the thigh of the lower leg. I actually know that position, I do tend to use it from time to time.

"Oh, that one! I didn't know there is a term for it."

Aang snickers. "Now you do."

"Now I do indeed," I jest, scrambling to copy his position. "What next?"

"This next." He puts his fists together in front of his solar plexus and closes his eyes. "Just listen to your breathing."

I blink, processing the view. He's gotta be kidding me. "You... want me to meditate," I state flatly and he cracks open an eye in what I assume to be confirmation. "Why didn't you just say so?!" I yell, annoyance getting the best of me. The other eye shoots open as well and Aang flinches back, one arm on the saddle for support and the other raised protectively in front of his face.

"Uhm, sorry," he offers awkwardly and straightens, shock overcome. "I didn't mean to appear condescending."

I sigh. I have recovered by now and feel bad for losing my temper. "It's fine. I'm sorry, too."

"It's okay."

"Let's meditate then?"

Aang smiles, then gets into position and closes his eyes. "Focus," he instructs, but the way he's doing it looks a lot more like he's talking to himself rather than me. "Feel the air flowing in..." He pauses to inhale. "...and out."

Alright, that shouldn't be too hard. I imitate Aang's position. It feels a bit silly at first... okay, scratch that, it feels _very_ silly at first. I'm not even sure why I'm doing this. Mostly to humor Aang, I guess, and if I can get some self-warming out of it, well... win-win. Besides, I can't lose to Toph! I mean, it might be her so called _healthy coating of earth_ which keeps her warm, but still... She's Earth Kingdom and probably not used to the freezing cold of snowscapes and heights.

So that's why I do this. Although I have to admit that, after a few cycles, I start to feel... calmer.

 _In... Out... In... Out..._

All the anxiety, all the worry about being in the wrong place flows out of my mind together with my very breath.

 _Inhale... Exhale... Inhale... Exhale..._

I feel... _free_.

"This has gotta be the most boring bending lesson I've ever seen."

Leave it to Toph to kill the atmosphere. "You can't even see," I retort monotonously, not bothering to move.

Toph fires right back, "That's the point." Of course, not without the obligatory measurement of sarcasm. But really, does that even make sense?

"Come on, Toph," Sokka suddenly pipes up. "Let them have fun with their breathing!"

"Meditating here!" Aang interrupts, sounding slightly irritated by now, and the silence returns. Nothing to add there, though I guess Toph isn't satisfied. Well, not my problem. Maybe she should try meditating, too.

I think I could have kept this up forever, if not for the fact that I'm still freezing. I relax my posture and rub my arms again. "Aang? I don't think I'm doing this right."

"What?" The little Avatar blinks, concern in his eyes. "There is nothing to... Right, you're still cold."

He's silent for a while, looking troubled. I can almost see his mind whirl. "Right, uhm, so... There are breathing and meditating exercises taught by the monks to maintain your body heat even in extreme cold, but they take a few weeks of daily practice to take full effect, aaaand..." He also relaxes now, leaning back on his hands and staring to the side. If that doesn't indicate discomfort, I don't know what does. What is he afraid of? Offending me?

"Go on, Aang," I try to encourage him. "Whatever you have to say, be assured I brooked worse."

The notion doesn't seem to make him feel better, but it gets me the intended result.

"I don't mean to insult, but airbending requires a certain level of spirituality, which the people of the Fire Nation neglected during the last hundred years. I can teach you the physical side of airbending, but fully mastering it will take years of dedication, if we..." He cuts himself off at that point and draws up his knees to rest his chin on them. He seems so downcast, so hopeless, so... _lost_. I can barely look at him. I don't even feel the cold anymore, I'm just... disappointed. With myself.

Why am I an airbender, anyway? If I just were a firebender, or not a bender at all, we wouldn't even have this disaster! I know how it is. You lose something important, spend time and energy on getting over it, then somehow get it back... only to have all your hopes crushed once again.

"You don't think I have it in me, do you?" I mumble. "You think I'm inadequate as an airbender."

"What?!" Aang quite literally jumps at the conception. "No, no, no, that's not what I meant!" he all but shouts and waves his arms frantically. I can just stare at him until he calms down and explains, "Of course you could do it. But I can't ask it from you, I won't. It would turn your whole life upside down."

"I see..."

I'm not opposed to some upside-downing in my life, but I get what he means. The Air Nomads had a vastly different lifestyle from the Fire Nation. I don't know the details, but Aang does. He's not doubting me, he's just being considerate. And that's enough to keep me warm for a while.

That, and the embarrassment once I realize the rest of the group has been watching all the time. Or listening in, in Toph's case.

Katara looks relieved. I can totally picture her bracing herself, ready to pounce on us the very moment we overdo it with depressing each other.

Sokka looks relieved, too. I picture him bracing himself, ready to pounce on me the very moment I overdo it with depressing Aang.

Yeah, that's the Water Tribe siblings for you. Toph, on the other hand, seems to ponder whether or not Katara's wrath is worth the satisfaction of calling us wimps.

Apparently, it is.

"So, now that you two are done competing for the Sissy Award, I vote for lunch break."

As expected, Katara sends Toph a withering glance. True to form, Toph comes out of it unwithered, and Sokka's growling stomach makes for a good distraction.

"Yeah, I'm all for lunch," he remains nonchalant about it. "Is there somewhere we can land?"

We opt for a mountain range. No human soul far and wide, just the five of us. I actually assumed we'd eat while flying, but Appa needs lunch, too.

It's a cold meal. I snack away on two ash bananas, some jerky (which Katara has to remind Sokka that it's not his alone, because the boy guards it jealously) and bread. Again, nothing fancy, but I don't mind. I goof around with Aang a bit, then Katara suggests to play a word-chain game (nouns only which cannot be derived from a verb, because those have similar endings and we don't want to get stuck with a chain which alternates between [-in]g and [-io]n). Sokka should be kicked out for not finding a word when it's his turn, but the words he makes up instead are too funny, so we don't. I think he does it on purpose. Toph's words are curious, too. Many of them sound just like Toph, but there are also more sophisticated ones. (Seriously, who uses "monarch" when you can use "king" or "queen" instead?)

"Where do you get these words from?" I ask in astonishment and as a side-effect, sneak in some thinking time for Aang. "You really don't seem the noble type."

She snickers. "Yeah! Isn't it great?"

I blink, not entirely sure if I should be skeptical about this or plainly disbelieving. "No offense, but... I don't get it."

Toph picks her nose and flicks the... _stuff_... into space. "Sokka, whatever you're doing, stop doing it."

My gaze flies to the Water Tribe teen, who has that totally-not-innocent look about himself, sitting erect and everything. I have no idea what he did, but he definitely did _something_ , and I really wonder what.

Only for about two seconds though, as Aang pipes up with "Height!" and steers my thought train in another direction. It's my turn.

"Table."

"Elbow," Katara continues.

"Water," Sokka goes with an actual word for a change, and thus we keep throwing nouns around. It's a lot more interesting than it sounds, as all the terms floating around are based in culture-specific vocabularies. I learn what an "igloo" is (a house made from blocks of ice), a "foehn" (a warm downdraft caused by mountains) or a "sandshark" (self-explaining, but I never heard of such an animal). I get to explain "pumice", which is basically cooled lava. It's a stone with so much air trapped inside that it floats in water. Toph remarks on how she encountered it before. Well...

We agree that we should play this more often, for it turned out to be very educational with our little Four Nations circle. And I really like it. There is so much to learn, and it works without actively questioning my beliefs. I never would have imagined how refreshing that can be.

So once I'm back in Appa's saddle, snugly wrapped in a blanket borrowed from Katara and with a full feeling in my stomach, I'm actually pretty happy with myself.

* * *

 **Aaaand cut!**

 **There is a lot of stuff to say about the contents of this chapter, mostly about the airbending part.**

 **As mentioned above, I spent a lot of time on research. What research? Breathing techniques. You wouldn't believe what the human body is capable of, and you don't even have to be a Tibetan monk to not kill yourself by running around the Himalaya. You can do it, too. ALL OF YOU! But you may want to take it slow, or you'll kill yourself getting there. Which sorta defeats the point. And that's also why I had to omit the whole thing in the end. At first, I wanted Aang to explain to Kami that he doesn't want to practice it up there, where the air is thin and cold and they could be distracted any moment, because he doesn't want her to faint on him. But then I figured Aang wouldn't say something like that because Kami could take it the wrong way and get scared. Which is not helping when you try to meditate.  
I also tried to figure out how to connect all that stuff I learned to airbending, AND to Tenzin. In LoK, when Tenzin teaches the new airbenders, he expects them to get the breathing right away. About that, I found a breathing technique which is something of a short-cut, heating for instant use, so to speak, but it's rather inefficient compared to the long-term method. So I guess it's fine for Air Temple Island, but not for the poles. (And the Northern Air Temple is a mystery anyway, temperature-wise. I wonder if they still have a bathhouse?)  
What I ended up doing is picturing the Air Nomads sitting all their four-year-olds down for breathing and meditation exercises, so they can float around the poles naked without freezing to death by the time they're five. It's crazy, but totally possible.**

 **Now back to Korra and Tenzin. I didn't really think about it before this chapter, but I noticed that Kami does have a parallel with Korra. Though for different reasons, they both lack the spirituality needed to become a true master. Kami is basically going to learn Korra-style airbending laced with Aang-style airbending. But I'm good with that, because I already know it's not gonna be Korra all over again. Both Aang's and Kami's personalities don't allow for it. (Really, sometimes I wonder how Tenzin managed to become so... _Tenzin_ , considering who his parents are. And his uncle, his FRIGGIN' UNCLE! Probably spent too much time around Toph, having been a couple with Lin and everything...)**

 **And last, but not least: Word-chain game! This is more of a personal thing, so if you're bored with reading this oversized A/N by now, you can leave here.  
I think word-chain games exist pretty much everywhere, but I based the educational aspect off a real life experience. Some of my readers know that I went to school in Japan for a year as an exchange student. There were four other exchange students at my school, and an English teacher there taught us Japanese.  
The Japanese word-chain game is called shiritori, and we played it pretty often to expand our own vocabulary with that of the others. We all picked up different words over the time and would exchange them, something many people don't have a tendency to do without prompting. It was great!  
The funny thing about shiritori is that you can actually lose outside of taking too much thinking time. If you blurt out a word which ends on "n", you're out, too. That's because Japanese doesn't have words starting with "n".  
(And why do I hear the armies of crazy weeaboos out there cry "NEKO!" now? *sigh* I don't like crazy weeaboos. They pretend to love Japan and know everything about it while they have absolutely no idea what they're doing. Just for clarification: Japanese being based on syllables, "neko" starts with "ne", not with "n". That's important. To make a chain, you use the last syllable. Kitsune, neko, koukai, inori, risu, suika, kami, mikan... AND out! [fox, cat, regret, prayer, squirrel, watermelon, paper/hair/god/sorry-ONDER-I-just-had-to, citrus fruit/mandarin] And I shall stop here now, because I'm talking too much. People who want to know more are welcome to PM me.)**

 **Zentauria officially over and out! Finally!**


	14. Stick Together or Else!

**Hi there! Actually, I have nothing to say here apart from: Whoops! Things just took a pretty dark turn...**

 **I decided I wanted some action and tried to dive a bit deeper into the war topic, but I never was big on action, so... Yeah, you'll see.**

* * *

We keep flying for another while. I don't know for how long exactly, I doze off in the saddle. Not exactly falling asleep, but I have absolutely no memory of the flight. Only touchdown slowly shakes me back to awareness and I untangle myself from the blanket which somehow managed to wrap around me like I was a fish caught in a net.

"Good, you're awake!" the blanket's owner pipes up.

"Never really out," I yawn and rub my eyes. To be honest, I could fall right back into semi-consciousness. "Just dozing."

"Do you do that a lot?" Sokka asks from below. He has hopped off the bison already and looks up to me and Katara with that annoyed expression on his face. I figure I just gave him some new paranoia fuel. You never know when I'm actually asleep, I guess? Makes talking about secret anti-Fire Nation stuff a bit hard.

"I'm an insomniac, Sokka," I explain. "My mind races at night instead of calming down. So yes, I do that a lot. I have to catch up on sleep somehow."

"Oh, I can help you with that!" Toph gleefully announces, and instantly, I'm very sure I do not want Toph's help.

"No, thank you," I drawl. "I'd rather not have a rock smack me over the head."

"Pity."

She even admits that she wants to smack me over the head with a rock. Oh man...

"It's okay, you can sleep as much as you need," Aang chimes and slides off his usual spot on Appa's head.

"Aang's right," Katara agrees while storing the blanket away. "It's not like there is so much else to do while we're in the air."

"Why are we on the ground now, anyway?"

"I give you three guesses," Katara chuckles and makes a swiping motion, indicating the rest of the group scampering off in various directions, though all headed for a sort of cover. A rock, or a tree. There is a forest.

Potty break, I realize. Simple as that. I don't really need to, but I still take the opportunity. I mean, why not?

I opt for the forest. The undergrowth promises some privacy, but I didn't account for the slope of the mountainside. So I walk around a bit and feel decidedly grateful for the chance to stretch my legs. And the view, by the High Dragons! The original intention soon forgotten, I keep hiking up the mountain until I find a ledge without trees to obscure the view, and it's _breathtaking_. Villages sprinkle the green and brown landscape, animals are nothing more than colorful dots at the horizon... I wonder what I missed out on while I was relaxing. The view from Appa must be so much more amazing than this...

Oh Agni, Appa! How far have I gone?!

Without wasting another glance at the landscape, I make my way back to our spot, dodging rocks and jumping fallen trees.

Something rumbles and I stop dead, then pull myself together. Seeing how we're in the mountains, it was probably just a landslide. But I can't shake the nagging feeling that I should go check it out. What if someone's in trouble?

No. I don't believe any idiot apart from us would be up here, and I need to get back, so that's exactly what I'm gonna do. Don't want to get into trouble with Sokka...

But as it turns out, Sokka is soon to be my slightest problem. I skip down the path I came when the ground suddenly opens up beneath my feet and I fall right into the mountain. I only manage a shriek before the hole closes again, cutting off the light, but the rest of the freak-out has to wait. I tumble down a slope, desperately clawing at the smooth rock to slow my fall. Nothing helps, not even trying to airbend works. While I do slow down, I just can't stop until I finally reach the end of the tunnel and find myself in a groaning heap inside a torch-lit cave.

I take a deep breath to get rid of the dizziness. I pick myself up and dust off my clothes. What is this place?

It's only then that I notice the wooden bars jutting out in a half circle around me. I'm trapped. What's the meaning of this?!

Okay, now I can freak out. I have no idea what this is about, but I know for certain that I don't like it. I have to get out of here, and I have to get out of here fast!

I ram my shoulder against one of the bars of my cage. There is a slight tremble, and it encourages me to try again. Nothing. Another attempt yields similar results. I try to brace myself against the wood and shove, but it wouldn't budge.

"Come on!" I growl at no one in particular, and I feel the first tears forming in the corners of my eyes. If I were a firebender, I could just burn the stakes away and walk free, but I'm not, I'm just a weak, pathetic, pitiful... airbender?

With a surge of hope, I look up. The cage has no ceiling. If I can sneeze myself ten feet into the air, I should be able to jump out of this thing. The bars are about seven foot high. Looks doable. Now I just need to figure out how to get this right...

I close my eyes, trying to feel the air around me. Stale and still, as expected from a cave. Trapped, just like me. It carries the scent of sweat and burned wood (someone more poetically inclined may say desperation and death, but I push the thought to the back of my mind), and I can't stop a twinge of fear from invading.

 _Out of here... I need to get out of here..._

I can feel the air reacting to my aggravated chi and open my eyes. Time to put all that practice I sneaked from my parents (and myself) to good use. I bend my knees, ready to launch, and... stumble.

The momentum yanks me to the ground and before I realize it, a whimper has escaped my throat. My feet are encased in earth, my rear hurts from the crash. It's hopeless.

The wooden bars sink into the cave floor, but I can't move from the spot. Two men tower over me, one skinny and sword-wielding, the other burly and unarmed. An earthbender.

I raise my arms protectively over my head and freeze in that position. I've never been so scared in my life, I don't even mind the tears spilling over my tunic. Those guys could overpower me with their pinkies. They're big and strong, and I... I'm nothing. I'm completely at their mercy, and I've heard enough horror stories about young girls at the mercy of men. I want to run. I want to be far away. I want Aang to come and get me out of this nightmare. I'd rather die than endure... _that_. The unthinkable.

I send a silent prayer to Agni and the High Dragons. Please, please, no! Somebody, make it stop!

"Quit your whining, girl! We can do this the easy way or the hard way. It's up to you."

I guess my sobbing is answer enough to these guys. An earth spire jolts me into an upright position. I'm too frightened to resist the rocks cuffing my hands on my back, but it appears that they're not going to hurt me. Yet.

I'm herded through a tunnel into another part of the cave, where a third guy is hovering over a scroll. He looks up when we enter.

"More goods?" he asks and I feel his gaze travel over my body like hot iron. He's sizing me up.

"Only this one," the guy with the sword replies. "Snooping around dangerously close to one of our entrances."

"Already tested?"

"Of course, sir. A nonbender."

My mind is reeling. A test? That wooden cage was a test, determining whether or not I'm a bender! Of course, a firebender would have set the stakes on fire. Someone was watching. I never had a chance. Good thing they didn't see me airbending, so maybe I can still escape. But what do these guys want? And what is that scroll-person up to, scribbling down notes as if keeping a registry?

"Put her in cage 3 for now, Soo Yun is busy. She will check on her later."

The next cave I'm led into, this time by the earthbender alone, is the most terrifying thing I've ever seen. It's a hallway with cells left and right, like a dungeon. Small figures are huddling behind the bars, children younger than me, some around my age. Some might be older, but it's hard to tell.

The stench is even worse than it was in the first cave. It smells like unwashed bodies, rotten food and sickness. Desperation and death indeed.

I feel very very ill, and I'm suddenly very glad that my lunch was only bananas, bread and dried meat. It's easier to keep in my stomach.

The cuffs are removed, but before I get to be happy about it, I'm shoved into one of the cells and the door slams shut behind me. My fellow inmates react differently, some look up, some look away, some don't react at all. I count and get to seven, five girls and two boys if my eyes aren't pulling tricks on me. Most of them seem to be around six to eight years old, then there is a girl who looks around ten, eleven, and one of the boys appears to be my age. The girl seems to be the center, perhaps the cell mom because she's the oldest girl. Right after me, now. She caresses one of the younger girls sleeping in her lap, and the young boy is hanging on her arm. I'm not sure if I find it heartwarming or just plain sad. This is wrong, so so wrong...

I wipe the tears from my face. Now that the men are gone, I feel oddly calm. There is no immediate danger, and I know I have a group of powerful benders covering my back. They'll come to find me.

I wonder if I should try to strike up a conversation. While it's not actually my style, this place is depressing. Dark and silent, except for a quiet sob somewhere in here, and the encouraging words whispered in response. Besides, maybe I can obtain some information on what this place is. Apart from the obvious, of course.

I decide to give the boy my age a light tap on the shoulder. He seems to be something of a loner, knees drawn up and doubled over, much like myself when I want to be left alone. And yet one of the children leans against him, so he can't be too much of the pushing-away kind. Besides, he was one of the kids who looked up, and I might have seen some fight glinting in his eyes. I figure he's my safest bet.

"Hey," I whisper, but the result is not what I have hoped for.

"Don't bother," the boy growls, or at least I think that's what he intended to do. It's more of a rasping, really, and the two words are enough to make him cough. "Sorry," he adds afterwards, voice somewhat fixed. It gives away a much more amiable personality than before, and he realizes it. He leans back, opening his posture in the process. He sighs. "Alright, what is it, newbie?"

I wish it weren't so dark. It makes figuring people out a lot more complicated.

"Can you tell me what kind of place this is? What do these people want with us?"

The boy looks sideways and goes back to curling up on himself. So much for openings. "You mean you haven't figured it out yet?" I've never heard so much bitterness coming from one person. "Those guys are merchants. And we're the merchandise."

One of the girls starts to cry before I can process the thought. I see how the eldest girl tries to get to her, but she can't reach her without waking the girl in her lap. Without thinking about it, I scoop the crying girl into my arms and hug her tightly. Her clothes are dirt-stained and ripped, and her hair is a disheveled mess which is barely recognizable as the twintails she must have worn when she was captured.

I couldn't care less about the dirt, and my nose has gotten used to the stench by now. "It's okay," I coo and rub her back, feeling more than uncomfortable in my skin. I'm terrible at this. How do I get a kid to stop crying?! "Sh, it's okay."

"I want my mommy back!" the girl sobs. "I want the scary men to go away!"

"Don't worry, they will. And then we'll find your mommy."

The girl sniffs and looks up to me with big, golden eyes, the torchlight reflecting off her tears. "Really?"

"Really. I promise."

"Don't make promises you can't keep," the boy pipes up and I send him an annoyed glance.

"You're not helping. Besides, I mean it. Those guys picked the wrong girl to mess with!"

"That's what they all say," he responds with that hope-dashing resignation of someone who is well beyond the despair horizon. So the fighting spirit I saw was only wishful thinking on my part, I guess. Which actually makes sense, considering I don't see much of anything in here.

The girl in my arms starts sobbing again. I pet her head and look around. Every single child looks away, and I realize what a thoroughly broken mess they are. Thin, dirty, dressed in rags. Some of them are injured, a scraped knee here, a cut on the face there. As far as I can tell, that is. If I want this bunch to hope again, I need a different approach. I mean, I can hardly tell them that _the Avatar himself_ is pretty attached to me and probably right on his way to bust us out. So, something else. I don't know what to do yet, but I need to yank that boy to my side, that much is clear. If I get him and the cell mom, the rest will follow.

With the crying girl still clinging to my tunic, I scoot over to the boy and sit next to him.

"So, uh..." Yeah, talking is totally my forte. "My name is Kamina, by the way."

"Judai," the boy, finally named, replies tersely. I don't think he wants to talk so badly... But why tell me his name then?

"Where are you from?" I keep probing, trying to draw him out. Again, I'm disappointed.

"Does it matter?" comes the less than helpful response, and I shrug.

"Not really, I guess..."

Silently rocking the girl on my knees, I wonder what else I can do. But it seems that I can't do anything but wait for the cavalry.

And I hate it.

* * *

 **Well... That escalated quickly. I still don't really know what to think about this chapter. It was interesting to write, that's for sure. The clash of the overall atmosphere with Kami's confidence that everything will be over after an hour top was actually pretty cool. But it didn't turn out the way I wanted.**

 **Well, anyway, what do you say? Good idea for a mini-arc? Weird? Totally unnecessary? Bring it on, I can take it!**


	15. Make Do With What You've Got

**Phew! I was really surprised with the positive feedback I got for the last chapter. I was so insecure about it, and now... Man, it's amazing! I guess I don't have to be afraid of darker plotlines anymore. Thank you all so much! You get a new chapter in return! ^-^**

* * *

I heard once that people who don't know what to talk about usually talk about the weather. Well, we can't even do that. There is nothing worth remarking on in here. Well, except for the cold maybe. I guess it's not just the feeling of closeness which drives those kids together. Even I catch myself unconsciously snuggling up against Judai.

He doesn't move away.

The girl I tried to comfort earlier is still with me, too, pressed against my chest and not about to leave any time soon. It's a weird feeling.

All my life, I've been shunned for something I didn't choose. Do I really need to be captured by slave traders first to finally experience actual solidarity? That's just sad...

The silence stretches on, but I stopped caring. It's a companionable silence after all, no one wants to say anything, and no one is forced to say anything. However, I still wish that Aang and the rest would hurry up.

After a while, the metal door locking our cave opens and reveals the earthbender guy who put me in here. He picks out children from the other cells, unlocking them one by one until he gets to my cell. I stare at him with all the hate I can muster, and that is _a lot_. It doesn't get any better when he points at the girl in my lap.

"You! Come here!"

She doesn't want to, that's blindingly obvious. She trembles and tears up, about to cry. Anger builds in my chest, seething, protective fury. I hug the girl tighter.

"Leave her a..." A hand clasps over my mouth, cutting me off in mid-sentence.

"Are you crazy?!" Judai hisses. "You're just asking for a beating!"

"Listen to him, girl," the earthbender sneers. "At least _he_ knows what's good for you."

I grit my teeth. So much for solidarity. We may be in this together, but as soon as it comes down to it, everyone's too scared to fight. And that includes me.

The anger quickly turns into self-loathing when I release the girl and leave her to her fate. For a moment, I feel what the others feel – the lack of hope, the lack of power. Helplessness.

I know the feeling oh too well. I draw up my knees and choke back a sob. I'm not going to cry in front of that person. Not again.

The man picks up another girl from the neighboring cell, then leaves with them. As soon as the door closes, I burst into tears. Why is this happening?

A hand snakes around my shoulder, and before I know it, I'm crying into Judai's chest. How can they do this to us? Are those people even human?

"Stop crying," Judai orders, not unkindly, but assertive. "You're making the other kids nervous."

He's right. I need to be strong, for the children. I will myself to calm down. The desperation subsides, but the anger stays. I pull back and wipe my face.

"Thanks, Judai."

He shrugs, and I get up to walk over to the bars keeping us in here. I'm not going to wait around for someone to rescue us. By the time Aang shows up, those girls may be out of reach.

"There's gotta be something we can do!"

"There isn't," Judai argues, a steely note entering his voice. "Just give it up, Kamina. Don't get yourself beaten up uselessly."

"Call me Kami," I give back, mind racing. "My full name is bad luck."

I normally don't tell that to people I barely know. Kami is the name my family uses. If someone calls me Kamina, it usually means I'm about to get hurt. And while I'd like to say that it changed with Aang, I don't feel it did. Not yet.

"Fine," Judai huffs. "Get back here, Kami! Don't do anything stupid. There is no way in the world you get out of here."

"You don't know that before you tried."

"That attitude will get you killed."

"But..."

"Stop!"

I spin around at the new voice, searching for the source.

"Stop it, Kami, please." It's the cell mom. I can't see her properly, but her tone is pleading. "Judai is right. They'll kill you." She hangs her head. The girl who has been sleeping is wide awake now, and the cell mom hugs her to her chest. "They did it before," she whispers. "I don't want to see them do it again."

Silence spreads over the group like a smothering blanket and my determination melts into hopelessness. Judai I can ignore, but that girl's story really gets to me. My legs refuse to support me any longer and I slide down the bars. My hands clench into fists on the ground, this is just so, so...

I don't have the words.

But I won't get anywhere if I keep wallowing in bitterness. Once I realize that, I take a deep breath. I bring my legs into the half lotus, my fists in front of my torso, and close my eyes.

 _Concentrate on your breathing. Feel the air flowing in and out. Alright, mind-Aang._

It takes a while, but my head clears with the time. I can feel the air move around me oh so slightly, the other children's breathing, and the constant stream of warmed air rising and cooled air sinking. It's amazing. There is so much I never tried to sense, resented to see. You can't separate airbenders from their element. If only my skills weren't so limited... There's got to be something I can do...

 _You'll get yourself killed._

 _I don't want to see it again._

 _Sorry guys, I can't wait around like this. There are kids out there who need me._

I take stock of my abilities. I can hold my breath very long, I can meditate, I'm agile, and I can shoot blasts of air if I have an adrenaline rush. Which I will definitely have if I need it.

"Kami?" Judai pipes up. "Are you okay?"

I blink my eyes open, slowly finding my way back to reality. I guess distraction is something I still need to work on. "Sure. I'm just meditating. It's really relaxing, you know? Clears your mind, slows down your heart rate..." Wait a minute...

I narrow my eyes. I've got an idea. It's the craziest plan ever, if you can even call it a plan... But it will get me out of this cage unrestrained.

I just hope I don't kill myself.

I crawl away from the bars, I need space to drop to my back.

"What are you doing?" Judai asks, and he does not sound amused.

"Something stupid," I probably confirm his suspicions. "And you can't stop me."

"I can try."

"Good luck figuring me out first."

And with that, I slow down my breathing again. I know I have to be careful with this. I'm about to do something humans are not supposed to do – abuse a broadened breathing rhythm to slow my heartbeat.

I remember someone was supposed to check on me, probably make sure I'm healthy. Sick slaves are worthless.

I'm not sure how low I can get without fainting. I'm not a hedgehogbear, I don't hibernate. So I take it slow. At first, I just feel weary, then drowsy. My hearing suffers, there is a commotion, but it's muffled. The urge to quicken my breathing rate sets in, but I fight it and slow down even more. I lose track of time. Only at the brink of fainting I settle into a steady breathing rate, or at least I try. I slip up, lose control. It's unavoidable, will alone can only do so much.

I feel so heavy, I know I couldn't move if I wanted to. I should stop this, it's insane. But if I keep going...

There is movement. The notion needs a long time to get through to my brain, as if carrying through cotton wool. There are sounds, too, but I barely hear them. Then a jolt. Some part of me tells me it's okay to actually start breathing again, that I planned for this. Slowly, quietly, I pull myself out of my self-induced stupor.

The first thing that returns is my hearing. Someone's arguing, but I can't make out the words just yet. The next thing assailing me is a headache, but it subsides rather quickly, as far as I can judge in my state.

"...figure out what caused her death!" I can finally understand again. "We can't afford to lose more merchandise!"

"I'm not a professional, Guo Ping, and you know that! I assume she had a heart attack."

Close one! I still feel light-headed, but who knows how long the attention stays elsewhere. I open my eyes, blinking against the sudden brightness. Come on, pupils, don't be such slackers!

Okay, this room looks like a lab or something, although I guess it's supposed to be mistaken for a hospital. I'm lying on a table. There are two people near the door, discussing. They don't look at me, thankfully, they're busy with each other. One of them is the burly earthbender, the other a woman who may be the local slave doctor.

So what now? I'm out of the cage, I'm unrestrained, but I can't take them both. I have surprise on my side, but even if I blast them with air, I don't think I have the power to knock them out.

I look around the room frantically. If I can find a weapon, I think I can make it. But I can't even see a broom! There is nothing I can wield!

Unless... My gaze lands on a tea cup, with the obligatory sugar box. I can't help a smirk. Perfect!

I swiftly grab a handful of the powder and take a good sniff. My nose tingles unpleasantly from the experience and I hastily press myself against the wall for support. By then, my two captors have realized that their dead slave isn't so dead after all.

"What?!" the earthbender gets to say... and then I _sneeze_.

The propulsion downright embosses me into the wall behind, but thanks to my precautions, there is no crashing and I remain unscathed, while the two slavers slam into the stone across the room and go out like two lights.

I just stand there for a moment, absolutely flabbergasted. I can't believe this actually worked!

I snap out of it a moment later and shake my head. Congratulations Kami, you just weaponized a sneeze. No one is gonna copy that so fast!

I run up to the two prone figures and search them for keys. The earthbender wears them on his hip like your average stereotype guard, so I find them quickly and fix them to my own belt. I take a peek out of the door. I recognize the cave I tumbled into. It looks empty.

Before I can change my mind, I dart across the floor, not believing my luck. This is too good to be true!

Yeah, no kidding.

The cave is not empty. It hasn't been empty when I came, and so it's not now. There is a hidden fissure in the wall, and a hardened looking woman I haven't seen yet steps in my way. How many members does that slaver band have?

"Well, well, well..." the woman says, almost sounding bored. "What do we have here? A runaway."

I hiss through gritted teeth. She is carrying a sword, already unsheathed. There is still enough distance between us that she can't run me through with it in one lunge, but I'm still wary of it. Very.

"Will you be a good girl and return those keys? It would be a shame to cut a strong body like yours. It decreases the value."

I slide back my left foot and raise my arms into a fighting stance, scowling. All that value talk makes me sick.

"How can you do this?!" I yell at her. "All those children... How can you square it with your conscience to sell us off like property? How can you knowingly consign us to such a painful fate? We're human beings, for Agni's sake! With families and feelings!"

The woman... laughs? "Good one! But you can't fool me, brat. You're not human, you're Fire Nation. You love tearing families apart, and imprison good people in your labor camps. We're doing you a favor."

My head is spinning with those accusations. If this is how the other nations view us, it's no wonder that Sokka hates me. But Fire Nation people aren't monsters!

"And now give me those keys!"

That snaps me out of it. "No!" I spit with all the venom I have in me and thrust my hands forward, willing the stale air to move with them. The woman stumbles backward, confusion written all over her face. With a now-or-never mindset, I follow up and ram into her, knocking her to the ground. The sword blade digs into my forearm as she falls, but I barely notice. I step onto the blade with one foot and use the other to kick her wrist. Her grip loosens and for a moment, we wrestle for the handle. A kick to the back of my knee costs me the advantage of height, but I'm not going to lose here. I take the risk to divert my attention from the blade and drive my elbow into her guts. The sword clatters to the ground and I give it a blow, sending it into the far corner of the cave. Knowing how to create suction would be nice, and I make a mental note to ask Aang about it once I'm out of here.

But I need to take out that woman first. A strike to the temple should do the job, the problem is getting there. My left arm is bleeding and my knee is throbbing from the kick. Whoa, and here comes a fist!

I pull back to dodge, and I'm surprised how _easy_ it is. So surprised that I lose balance and remain totally open to a blow to my stomach. I double over, the excruciating pain leaves me paralyzed for a moment. Long enough for the woman to grab my braid and pull me to my feet.

"Alright, brat!" she growls and yanks at my hair, sending another wave of pain through my scalp. I whimper and stumble backwards, right into her grip. She twists my arms into the same shoulder-unfriendly hold Sokka used on me when I blasted Katara. "If this is how you want to play it, you shall not be disappointed."

"Let go!" I cry, to no avail of course. I squirm, stomp her feet, kick her shin. Nothing seems to faze her. I'm forced to my knees, tears of pain and desperation freely flowing from my eyes. I'm back to the helpless mess I was before.

In a play, this would be the perfect moment for the cavalry to burst in, but no Toph miraculously breaks through the wall.

I'm all alone.

* * *

 **I feel so evil now. The cliffhanger sorta wasn't planned, but I need to make a break at some point...**

 **But I'm so in it now, the next chapter probably comes flying by tomorrow. (No promises, but I'd be surprised if not.)**


	16. Never Give Up

**So much for the next day. Ah, well, that's why I make no promises. Sorry again for the cliffhanger!**

 **So, without further ado: On to the story!**

* * *

 _How do I get out of this? How, just how do I get out of this?_

Why can't I get lucky and run into a stupid guard like the heroes in stories? Would it be so much to ask? That woman has plenty reasons to let go of me for a second. Like, picking up her sword or reaching for those cuffs I remember seeing at her waist, or remove the keys from my belt. But no. Of course, she has to play it safe and walk me into the next cave to get registry-guy for backup.

He's once again poring over a scroll, brush in hand to make notes.

"What is it now, Zahmi? Can't you see I'm..." He looks up, spots me, goes wide-eyed and then frowns. "Isn't that the dead girl Soo Yun just picked up?"

"Dead? As you can see, she is very much alive and kicking. I need your help to subdue her."

Registry-guy strokes his beard thoughtfully. "You do seem to do a good job of it on your own."

"Very funny, Chano. What do you think is going to happen once I release her arm to get Guo Ping's keys off her?" She yanks at my arms to emphasize her point, and a gasp escapes me. My shoulders...

At that, registry-guy frowns once again. "You're trying to tell me that whiny fire brat has beaten Guo Ping?"

"The signs certainly are there."

"Interesting." He finally stands up and struts over to us. I have no idea what to expect, and I'm a bit anxious about it. But if push comes to shove, I still have my knees. Which will get me crippled if I make use of them, but it's always good to have a Plan B.

The guy grabs my chin and pulls it up, with enough force to make the back of my neck sting. He forces me to face him. And with my aversion against eye contact, that's just _peachy_. I automatically squeeze them shut.

"Tell me, girl, how would a tiny nonbending fire brat get the best of Guo Ping?" I hear his dangerously silky voice. Why does he even want to know? Anyway, I'm not going to tell him. Give away my only advantage? Not happening.

Another flash of stinging pain.

"Look me in the eye and answer, brat!"

I keep silent. Some people may title my defiance as 'courageous', but really, I don't feel very brave. It's just that iron logic that keeps me from opening my mouth. Things are gonna get worse either way, and I'd rather keep my secret.

"Told you she's difficult," the woman pipes up again and registry-guy lets go of my chin, meaning I finally have control of my head again. I immediately slip back into a comfortable position and blink.

Just in time to see a hand coming at me and slap me across the face with an almost concussive force. I scream and tear up. I didn't know a slap can hurt so much!

"Don't worry, Zahmi. I'm sure Guo Ping will teach her some manners once he feels up to it."

I take a deep breath to get rid of the dizziness. My cheek feels like an army of scorpionant bites. I want to touch it, but my hands are still securely on my back.

 _How do I get out of here?_ , my mind goes back into repetition mode. My legs are free, there's gotta be something!

I don't really think about my next move. When registry-guy leans forward to open my belt, I sweep his feet from beneath him. He lands on the floor with an "Uumph!", but like pretty much any plan which hasn't been thought through, it backfires.

"That does it!" the woman behind me fumes and pushes me down, forcing me to the ground. "Looks like you need a lesson right now!"

Alright, maybe it didn't backfire after all. The panic gives me the strength I need to ignore the pain in my shoulders and rear, using my whole body to send a stream of air upwards. It's not a strong blast, but the woman reflexively lifts a hand to shield her face, essentially freeing me from her grip. I roll to the side and propel myself to my feet, frantically looking around. Where is registry-guy?

Doesn't matter! I dash into a direction he isn't, which happens to be the table. That hasty act saves me – turns out registry-guy was right behind my back, but I only notice when I swish behind the table and spin around.

There is a lull. With the table between us, we all take a moment to catch our breaths, size each other up and weigh our chances.

So, good news. The keys are still fixed to my belt. The bad news: I'm outnumbered, and both my opponents are stronger than me. Everything I have is my agility, my brain and my maybe-not-so-wild bending. And a table with scrolls and writing materials.

I wonder if they figured my abilities out by now, but I don't think so. I haven't used glaringly obvious moves yet, and I know from experience that humans can ignore a lot of stuff which doesn't fit their worldview. And a Fire Nation airbender probably doesn't fit anyone's worldview.

"I leave her to you for a moment." The woman is the first to speak up again. "You can handle that little monster until I picked up my sword, right?"

Uh oh. I don't like the sound of that.

"Sure, go ahead."

I hastily pick up a scroll and throw it at her. "Not on my watch!"

Wait, did I just say that out loud? Where do I take that boldness from?! Well, anyway, gotta concentrate on staying alive right now. Registry-guy comes to pay me a visit at the table while the woman sneaks out, and I can't have that. I'm not going to disarm her again, a person just can't be that lucky.

I grab the thing which comes closest to a weapon: the inkstone. My hand gets tinted black from the stuff, but I can worry about that later. I aim at registry-guy's face and throw. He deflects the heavy missile with his arm, giving me just enough time to kick at the table like I've seen some benders do in exhibition fights.

It doesn't slide into registry-guy's gut like I had hoped. In fact, it hurts my toes. Turtle whiskers, this thing is fixed! Probably earthbent right out of the ground. Alright then, let's take the chair instead!

The chair is wooden, thankfully. I can pick it up by the seat, but really, ever tried wielding a chair? It's not easy to maneuver. So before I keep struggling with it, I push my feet against the ground and land on the table. Registry-guy obviously didn't see that coming, and I don't blame him. No normal person could make that jump with a chair weighing them down. But I'm an airbender, I can do stuff. And that means I'm free to smack registry-guy over the head with the chair.

Kami three, slavers zero. Alright, slavers one, I guess. Maybe two. They captured me two times. And where is that woman now? Probably in the adjoining cave, picking up her sword. Great. Maybe it's time to make a dash for the dungeon and get the other children out. We could crowd her. But would they even be willing to fight?

No. They're children. I can't ask it from them to pit themselves against a sword wielder. Besides, I'm in an ideal position for a sneak attack right now. Not gonna let it pass in favor of trying to figure out which key opens the door. In fact, I'd be defenseless while unlocking the door.

With that in mind, I pick up the chair again and stand next to the door to the entrance cave. The rest is somewhat anticlimactic. As soon as the woman's nose shows in the door frame, the chair comes down and finish.

But that's pretty much what I needed. I've had enough excitement for today, and probably the rest of my life. With the desperate energy that has kept me going all the time nothing short of depleted, I start to feel the pain. I'm panting. Blood seeps from the cut on my arm. Muscles hurt I never knew I had. I'm tired, so, so tired.

But it's not over yet. Those slavers won't be out forever. No time to rest. I unfasten the keys from my belt and try them on the dungeon door, one by one until I get it right. The door creaks open, but it takes another while until the children realize that the one stepping through it is in fact me, not a slaver.

I unlock the nearest cell and open it wide. "Get out of here!" I order the children inside. "It's safe."

They don't move, just stare. I sigh and go on, unlocking the next cell which happens to be the one I'd been thrown into. Judai is already standing at the door, waiting for me.

"Kami, what happened?" he demands to know. "You suddenly stopped breathing and that woman couldn't detect a heartbeat. We all thought you were dead!"

I manage a weak smile. "It takes a lot to kill me."

The lock clicks and I pull at the door, then I point the key at the exit. "Get those kids out of here, will ya? I don't know how long those slavers will remain unconscious."

His eyes widen. "Don't tell me you did..."

"Oh, I did alright."

"That's amazing..." Judai breathes. "No wonder you look like this. Come on, I'll take it from here. You sit down and take a rest."

"Sounds fair."

I hand him the keys and very nearly collapse to the ground. My legs are in a bit of a hurry to get my weigh off themselves.

"Nila, you're up!" Judai calls into the cell. "Gather the little ones! We don't have much time!"

I'm glad to see how quickly he understands the situation and takes charge. There are six cells, each holding about five kids. Some of them jump at the chance to escape, others need more convincing, but all in all, things go smoothly. The weaker children catch piggyback rides on the stronger ones (which includes Judai and me) and after a few minutes, everyone's good to go.

One of the other older children claims to know the way out, and we let her take the lead. It has something of a class trip, with about thirty children flooding through the door and past the unconscious slavers.

Judai shakes his head at the sight. "I can't believe it. If this is a dream, let me sleep. I mean, how did you do that?!"

"Luck, luck and plenty luck," I respond, but my insides are warm with pride. I guess I'm not so weak after all.

Judai laughs, and Agni, I _adore_ the sound! It's probably just the circumstances, but I've never heard such a pleasant laugh before.

"Well, let's hope that luck isn't going to run out soon."

He just _had_ to say that, right? A cry from the front stops everyone dead in their tracks. "It's sealed!"

Shocked whispers carry through the group. Some younger kids break down in tears. I share a look with Judai, and it pierces my heart. All the color has drained away from his face, the shell-shocked despair has returned. The boy on his back is hanging on for dear life. (The girl on my back can hold her own well enough.)

Before I know it, I rush to Judai's side and grab his arms, fearing he might just fall apart. "Come on, Judai, stay with me here! Maybe we just caught the wrong tunnel!"

"Maybe..." he mumbles, but it's clear neither of us believes it. There is at least one earthbender among the slavers. It would make sense to seal the entrance.

"What happens now?" my rider asks timidly and I reach back to pat her on the head. "Don't worry, we'll be fine! I'll think of something. I didn't come this far to give up now!"

That's when a ripple goes through the floor and throws me off my feet. The girl on my back loses her hold and the whole group basically ends up in a tangled heap of limbs.

I sit up and shake my head to get rid of the daze. I don't need to look up to know what's happening.

We're caught. And I'm quickly singled out as the main character in this little prison break. A hand wraps around my neck and lifts me off the ground, just to press me against the wall of the cave.

"So, you thought you can just stroll off and steal our merchandise, huh?" the earthbender threatens. I briefly wonder if he is an avid reader, he seems to like cliches, anyway. First the key belt, and now the neck lift complete with choking. Yeah...

No big deal though, it's just strangling. I can handle that a while, so my first concern is about the others. I try to see past the earthbender and spot swordswoman as well as registry-guy rounding up their so called 'property'. But they seem to be safe for now, this is all about me. Man, I feel honored.

"We're no one's merchandise!" I choke out. "Let us go! You have no right to take us!"

The hold tightens. I take a rattled breath for good measure, which may even stretch my time another minute or two.

"Big words for someone as tiny as you, little girl." Man, I hate that guy's arrogant demeanor. "Tell me, how does it feel to hang up there?"

Someone cries out for me in the background. I think it's Nila, the cell mom. Judai shushes her up. I guess that's his way of looking out for her. I guess it's what he does best. Glad to know he rediscovered his voice.

"It's a bit uncomfortable, thanks for asking." Call me crazy, but I'm starting to enjoy this. "Something pricks my left shoulder blade. I think there is a rock jutting out of the wall."

Maybe that wasn't the best idea. The guy pulls back and slams me into the stone, hard enough to set my ears ringing. Did I scream? I think so. I can swear the back of my head cracked. That hurt pretty bad, and I'm battered enough as it is.

"Shut your insolent mouth, fire brat!"

'But you asked!', I want to say. My back tells me not to. I steal another glance at the other kids. Judai is in cuffs now, I notice. Why? What did he do?

A deeper study reveals that his only crime appears to be his age. All the older kids wear metal. Categorized as potentially dangerous, I guess? Agni and the High Dragons, I made quite a mess of everything. Didn't I?

"Leave them alone," I can't help pleading. "They didn't do anything. They just followed my lead."

This time, the guy almost crushes my throat. I hiss through gritted teeth and squeeze my eyes shut. Ouch! That will probably leave marks. Maybe I should stop enjoying the view and start defending myself.

"How are you still speaking?! You should be out by now!"

Okay, one last quip. "What, didn't your doctor tell you?" I rasp a lot less impressively than I had hoped. "I died. My breath and my heart stopped. You can't kill dead people, you know?"

The guy drops me like a hot cucumberpotate and steps back, wide-eyed. I land on all fours, rubbing my neck gingerly. Agni, I didn't even imagine that could have such an effect! I would have said it a lot earlier.

"She's dead!" the guy exclaims with a comically unfitting shriek. Almost girly. I would laugh if my throat wouldn't hurt so much, I think I need Katara to look at it.

"No, she's not," swordwoman deadpans from behind. "I know you're not the smartest, Guo Ping, but that brat is definitely alive. Even you should be able to see that."

"But...!"

A deafening boom assaults my eardrums and sunlight floods the cave.

"Did someone order an all-inclusive dish of butt-whooping?" an all too familiar voice rises and the relief rushing through my veins almost knocks me into oblivion for good.

The cavalry is here!

* * *

 ***stretches* Phew, what a ride! Even I didn't know where this was going, my actual plan took a wrong turn and now we're here...  
** **That chair, it came out of nowhere! But it makes sense, a table usually comes with a chair. Hehehe. ^^"**

 **I'm glad I decided to try this plotline out. Kami has developed a lot in the last three chapters. She became so strong, and even got herself a boyfriend. Nyahaha! (No, seriously. Judai got a bit out of hand here, too. He was supposed to be a support character, and no teensy bit more. But I admit that I like the idea. It actually saddens me to know that I'll leave him behind soon. *sigh* He's broken, similar to Kami. And broken characters always make me want to build them up. I have so many ideas to flesh Judai's character out a bit more...)**

 **Anyway, a lot of the stuff Kami pulls in this arc is scientifically remarkably unfounded, because physical impossibility. Don't try this at home, and leave your heartrate where it is! ^-^**


	17. Until We See The Sun

**So, I spent the last two days without Internet connection, and in a writing frenzy, too. So I'll answer the reviews later.**

* * *

It's pandemonium.

Aang savvies quickly enough that the earthbender guy is not my friend and engages him in a fight, once they start earthbending however, things get out of hand even quicker.

Katara is instantly by my side and asks for my worst injuries. I just point at my neck and a moment later, I'm wearing a glowing water scarf. I recognize the sensation, it's the same as back when I crash-landed on Appa's saddle.

"What happened?" she wants to know, eyes darting around, apparently trying to make sense of the scene.

"I'll explain later. Just take out the adults and get those kids the flubbering turtleduck out of here!"

"Those people are Earth Kingdom."

"They're slavers, Katara!" I insist, getting more and more upset. "Here to kidnap innocent children and probably ship them off to their homeland to be sold to rich nobles!" Apropos... I almost forgot in all that chaos. "That reminds me... They actually just took a group of little girls, which is why I took things into my own hands in the first place." I jump to my feet. "We have to save them!"

She doesn't seem to like the idea. Her worried gaze travels across the cave. I don't really know what to make of it.

"Please, Katara!" I beg. "I promised that girl I'll bring her back to her mum. I need your help!"

She looks unsure for another moment, then her gaze hardens and she nods with steely determination. "Let's do it."

Once again filled to the brim with energy, I look around to call onto someone and tell them we're off, only to realize that the fight is already over. Swordwoman and registry-guy are encased in earth, while earthbender guy lies on the ground, a very smug Sokka standing above him and smacking his club onto his palm.

"Well..." I comment flatly. "That was too easy."

I'm once again reminded how decidedly unamazing I actually am, compared to these guys. Even Sokka is a better warrior than me. At least he knows how to use the weapons he has. I was born to weaponize the very air everyone's breathing, and I have no idea.

 _The air everyone's breathing..._

That thought carries some really gruesome implications. How did the Fire Nation manage to wipe out the Air Nomads again?

I shake these thoughts off and walk over to Judai. I think I've never seen a group more deserving of the title _dumbstruck_ than the ex-slave kids. I give the nearest kid a gentle nudge into the direction of the exit. "Go on! Go see the sun. It's okay."

The kid gives a puffy-eyed nod and dashes off. I smile after him. Some of the other kids follow, and their joy is overwhelming. They're hopping around, climbing up the trees or simply lying down. Fire Nation people have a special connection to the sun, even those who can't firebend.

"Kami?" Judai grabs my attention. "Are those guys with you?" He indicates the rest of my group with his head.

I chuckle. "More like the other way round, but basically yes."

"Kamina!" I hear Aang call and watch him sweep across the cave. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Kuzon," I half laugh, half grumble. A part of me feels slighted by the worry implying that I can't take care of myself, but I'm mostly grateful.

"Kuzon?" Judai repeats, obviously trying his hardest to suppress a snort. The attempt fails. "I'm sorry. My great-grandfather was called Kuzon."

"He was?" Aang goes for the double take, piquing my interest. I wonder _just what exactly_ he associates with the name. The most logical conclusion would be a friend from back in the peaceful days. Argh, my head smokes trying to comprehend that the kid in front of my nose is supposed to be a century old!

I put a hand on Aang's shoulder, giving it a subtle squeeze. "It was a common name during Firelord Sozin's reign. These days, it sounds a bit... out of place." I hope he gets what I'm saying: If you're searching for a certain Kuzon, the chances that he's Judai's great-grandfather of all people are very slim.

"Yeah," Judai confirms my explanation. "It's a bit hard to connect to a kid like you. You're colonials, aren't you?"

"I'm not, but that's about it," I respond, sighing. "That's also why I didn't tell you that there's a bunch of powerful benders about to bust the whole place. I wasn't sure how you'd take it that I'm associating with colonials."

"Well... Now I know where you got your confidence from." Judai shakes his head. "But, honestly, I'm beyond caring by now." He raises his arms and makes a show of tugging at the chain shackling his wrists together. "I would have put up with a southern snow savage to get out of that Agni-forsaken cage."

A very pointed cough announces Sokka, accompanied by Toph and Katara. Aang pulls a face, while I feel an overwhelming need to crawl under the nearest stone. Oh Agni, _Judai!_

But the Water Tribe siblings take the insult mostly in stride. "Care to inform us what this is all about?" Sokka asks with only a teeny tiny hint of a sneer in his voice. "Everything I gathered so far is something about slave trade."

I heave a deep breath. I need to keep my priorities straight. And first priority is to get into everyone's brains that they can't call each other by their actual names. I'd trust Judai with my life (wow, that sounds much more significant than it is), but not with everybody else's. Anyone call Aang by his obviously Air Nomad name and we're in trouble. "That's right, slave traders. But all in its proper time. So, may I introduce? Judai, these are my friends Sora, Kari and Toki. And Kuzon of course. Everyone, this is Judai, one of my fellow ex-slaves. He knows more about the whole thing than me, so ask him."

"What?!" Judai sputters. "That wasn't the deal!"

"Yeah, sorry, but Kari and me got a ship to chase, or at least I think so." I look from Katara, who seems worried, to Sokka, who has his arms crossed in dissatisfaction, and then at Aang, who looks skeptic. "You guys didn't happen to see a river around?" Turtle whiskers, I should have paid attention myself...

"There is a fjord about a mile west from here," Judai offers pensively. Point taken, he's a local. "It goes right to the sea. I think Kami is right, the girls must be down there. But I doubt you can catch up to them."

I share a look with Katara, and I see my own determination reflected in her eyes.

"We'll make it," she assures and Judai shrugs.

There is a sound coming from Toph. She's smacking her palm with her fist. "Sweet. Then Twinkletoes and me will free the rest."

Huh? "What rest?"

"That would be the firebenders!" Judai explains, sounding slightly agitated. "They're kept in sealed stone chambers, so they can't melt themselves out."

"That actually makes sense," I ponder aloud. Good thing we have earthbenders, whipping out the excavation tools wouldn't have been _too_ ideal.

Sokka presses a hand to his face, not happy with the notion. "Firebenders... I didn't sign up for this," he mutters, before he becomes more business-like. "Alright, Toki and Kuzon can go pick up the firebenders, and Kamina and Kari can go ship hunting. I'll stay here and keep an eye on these guys." He points a thump over his shoulder at the slavers. "And when this is over, I expect a detailed explanation!" he adds with a pointed look at me.

"Aye aye, Captain Sora!" I jest and give a mock salute, before I steel myself and look over the group one last time, drinking in the determined expressions of my companions. I didn't ask to get mixed up in this, but now that it happened, I wouldn't want to face it with anyone else.

But before I turn around, my gaze catches at Judai's shackles. That reminds me... "Toki, a few of the teens are cuffed. Do you think you can do something about it?"

"No problem, Fireflake!" Toph grins and cracks her joints. "Get them here and watch in awe."

"Hm." I'm curious. Metalbending is supposed to be impossible. If anyone can do it, I want to see it with my own eyes.

Judai, who has no idea what's coming to him, wears a guarded expression when he reaches out to give Toph his wrists. The Earth Kingdom girl feels the metal for a moment, smirks ("Too easy!") and claws the first ring apart. Then the other. I grin like an idiot, Judai stares in disbelief. A moment later, he relaxes and throws up his hands.

"Alright, I get it, I'm done. I'll send in the others and then just... go find a mango tree."

I snicker. My father would have said "I'll go find a drink!"

I guess there is only so much weirdness a guy can take.

"Very nice, Toki." I give Toph a thumbs-up until I remember she can't see it. "Alright, let's get going then."

"Good luck!" Aang wishes.

"You, too," Katara takes the words right out of my mouth, then we split up. I dodge the kids resting or playing in front of the cave entrance, then let Katara take the lead. Neither of us speaks on the way down the mountain. Now that we made sure everyone is doing what they can to help, playtime is over. We only break our run when we reach the fjord and are forced to search for a path down. Which we follow until we're near enough to the water for Katara to draw it up and create a slide from ice, directly into the river.

Only then do I start to have second thoughts. I mean, I trust Katara to make her slide waterbender-proof, but how about idiot-proof?

"Uhm, Katara? Are you sure this is safe?"

She smiles encouragingly and reaches out. "Trust me."

I take a deep breath and grip the offered hand.

"Ready?" Katara asks and I nod, gulping hard. I have to do this.

"As ready as I'll ever be."

I close my eyes and down we go. It feels like I'm falling rapidly and my stomach doesn't quite keep up. The drop probably lasts about three seconds, but it seems like ages – way too long. Then there is a curve, and another one before we finally come to a stop. I carefully blink my eyes open. We're standing on a floe, and the slide and the curves are gone, like a bad dream. But I still feel the aftermath in my trembling legs and my queasy stomach.

"Do you need a break?" Katara asks worriedly. I'm tempted to say yes, but I shake my head instead.

"No, I'm fine. Go on."

I look the river up and down. No ship in sight, but there is a turn downstream blocking out the waterway. Katara drives us around the bend and...

"There!" I call excitedly, the rough ride forgotten. "That's definitely not a Fire Nation ship!" It's too small, and wooden.

Katara's eyes narrow and she steps it up a notch. We're spotted after a couple feet, but it's too late. I get treated to a feat of awesomeness on Katara's part when she bends us onto the deck together with a huge wave, freezing everything that moves.

I'm stunned for a moment, then let out a cheer. "Katara, you rule!"

But the Water Tribe girl remains all business. "Let's find the children."

"How about asking nicely?"

I recognized one of the crew members as skinny-sword-guy, the one who picked me up together with earthbender guy. He seems to recognize me, too.

"You!" he spits, but he doesn't seem too threatening anymore, being stuck up to the neck in ice.

"Yup, me," I retort grimly. "Sorry to break it to you, but you picked the wrong girl to mess with. And now you're going to tell me where the girls are!"

"Why don't you ask your friend?" skinny-sword-guy sneers and I turn around to Katara, who uses her waterbending to rip the planks off the deck.

"Kamina!" she calls. "I found them!"

"Seems to me that you still have a lot to learn, fire brat."

I grit my teeth and stomp off, silently chafing at my uselessness. Katara doesn't even need me. She could have pulled off the whole rescue all on her own.

But my mood lifts the very moment I join her and find the girls sitting down there.

"Kamina!" one of them even cries out and I recognize the little girl from my cell. I smile.

"Hang on, kids! We'll get you out of there! Katara, can you bend a stai...?" And a staircase appears. "Way ahead of me, I see. Thanks."

"My pleasure," she replies, almost sounding sardonic. I wonder if she takes the whole thing personal on some level. I don't think she's usually like this.

But I don't ask. A woman's past is her business. I half step, half slide down the stairs. "Okay girls, everyone out! Is someone hurt?"

"Rika can't walk," my little protegee reports and points at a girl who sits a bit awkwardly. She seems to favor her right foot. I walk over to her and pick her up. She whimpers and starts to cry. Oh Agni, no! Not again!

"Sh, it's okay!" I attempt a soothing voice, but the girl keeps crying. I rush up the stairs and basically scream for Katara.

"What is it?!" the waterbender reacts accordingly. As answer, I shove the crying kid into her arms. "Her right foot is injured. You take care of it, right?"

She nods perplexedly and I flee below deck again to support the other children. They're so young, and they don't look good. I have to make sure that everyone's okay. And this is just the beginning.

How do we get them all back up the mountain?

* * *

 **So, I got a guest review saying that said guest ships Kami and Judai now. My first thought: Yeah, me too! ^-^  
Dang it! Ships are monsters. I CREATED A MONSTER! AND IT SWALLOWED ME WHOLE! XO  
Alright, just kidding. Ships are only monsters if consumed in overdoses. I'll see where I take it from here, shipping shouldn't get in the way of a good story. (Keep in mind that Kami hasn't even seen the guy in sunlight yet. She doesn't even know his freaking _eye color_!)  
But let's not spoil the fun just yet. Someone else who's already shipping those two? ^-^**

 **Else... I'm surprised how many feedback I suddenly got. Still. I prefer writing slice of life, looking at character interaction, explore relationships... casual stuff. I think I'm better at that than action. But it looks like some action actually doesn't hurt, and the Avatarverse offers the possibilities.  
So yeah... I'm not going to reply to every single review, only the longer ones. But I still appreciate the support. Thanks a lot, guys and gals! I have a lot of fun writing those chapters, and now I see that you like them so much, I'll be sure to write some more! Again, thank you so much!**

 **Yeah, I think that's it for now. Peace out! See you in the next chapter (I hope)!**


	18. What Now?

**I think one of the hardest parts about writing is giving your characters names. It's something of a lucky shot that Fire Nation names are mostly Japanese with L thrown into the mix.**

 **So many new names... u.u**

* * *

Katara runs the ship up the shore, while I find a coil of rope and use it to tie the slavers up. Serves them right!

I don't really like the idea of leaving them behind, it's entirely possible that they free themselves and escape before someone can send guards here, but we don't have much of a choice. It will be hard enough with the children only. Katara spends some time healing the worst injuries, while I take the chance to get a drink and wash the ink off my hands. I also do a headcount and come up with eight. After we're finished, Katara bends us up the fjord as far as she can, but the rest is up to the girls. Problem is that none of them seems to be older than seven.

I carry Rika on my back (and she falls right asleep). Some of the other girls complain about the unfairness, but the girl I claimed as my protegee (I find out that her name is Marisa, or just Mari) gives it her best to help maintain order. Katara walks at the front, I bring up the rear, and Mari is everywhere. She even gets another girl to join her mission.

It's good to see how they motivate each other. They haven't seen their families in a while, and most of the girls can't wait to be home. Two of them, however, are less than enthusiastic. They drag their feet and basically slow the whole group down.

"Mari!" I call out and the girl dutifully falls back to me.

"Yes?"

"Can you find out what's up with those two? Don't they want to go home as well?"

Mari lowers her gaze. "They said that their mommies and daddies are gone, and that they were taken to a new place where they ran away from."

 _Orphans!_ , flashes through my mind. Did those two run away from an orphanage? That would make them easy prey for sure. And yeah, possibly unmotivated to return, too.

I wish I could do something for them. I feel so overtaxed! Babysitting has never been my strong suit, and babysitting a bunch of little girls who just went through a traumatic experience even less so. I'm really glad to have Katara with me. While the girls seem to trust me more than her, I feel she was born for situations like this. She always seems to know the right thing to do or say to get the kids to keep moving. Give it a few more minutes and I'll be second rank again.

Yeah... Before long, the orphan girls let themselves be taken by the hand, and it's not me who reached out for them. Maybe I should have, but it just didn't occur to me. I'm so used to people not wanting to do anything with me that taking the initiative feels like intruding. Circumstances must be truly special for me to try and make contact.

"Why are we going back?" Mari snaps me out of my thoughts. "Why are we not going home?"

Good question. It would actually make more sense to go directly to the nearest village. However, we need to rendezvous with the others and plan our next steps. It would probably raise some suspicions if we resume our travels right away and leave the kids to their own devices. But neither do I want to get involved with the authorities. An unsupervised group of traveling children isn't any less suspicious. Besides, it's entirely possible that a missing report has reached this place and someone recognizes me. Not probable, but still a risk.

"Don't worry, Mari. We _will_ go home. But we need to pick up the others first. They're waiting for us."

"I miss my mommy," she mumbles, head hanging low. I look down at her, my chest seems to constrict painfully. I suddenly have to think about my own mum. How is she doing? How is the rest doing?

I sigh, banishing the images to the back of my mind. I miss my mommy, too.

"Just a little longer, okay?"

You'd think a mile isn't all that much. And yet it's the longest mile of my life. Uphill, with children in tow. Katara is so smart and tells them halfway that they should call her Kari. It's a game. The first girl to call her Katara loses.

A pang of guilt rushes through me. I started the whole alias thing, but then I had to go ahead and blow it by calling her Katara in front of the kids. I hope none of them slips up.

* * *

I have no idea how long it takes for us to arrive back at the cave, but it certainly feels like hours. Hmm, maybe half an hour?

Once we arrive, the girls drop into the grass, and when I look around, I find that the group of teens has grown. I can tell right away who the firebenders are, they look even more beaten than the rest. There is a boy lying on his belly in the sun, torso bare and revealing a pattern of nasty bruises and cuts all over his back. It makes me think he's been whipped recently. A girl is sitting with him, tears staining her cheeks. She's whispering to him and I cringe in sympathy.

I tear my gaze away. Toph and Sokka are sitting a bit off the rest of the group, while Aang is hanging upside down on a tree branch, surrounded by a group of young admirers. He seems to have a lot of fun.

He drops to the ground once he spots us and the three of us join Sokka and Toph to discuss our situation.

"So, what now?" Katara kicks it off. "Do you think we should stay?"

"I'd rather get out of here, but I think we have to," I respond. "I'm afraid this group will fall apart if we leave them now."

"Why would you think so?" Toph asks. "Most of them are old enough to handle themselves and a few little kids."

"Old enough perhaps, but strong enough? They have a horrible time behind them. Many of them are injured and Katara can't heal them without revealing her waterbending."

"I don't think that's going to matter any longer," Katara cuts in and gestures at one of the girls we freed, I think her name was Laika? She's talking excitedly to one of the firebenders, and they're both looking our way.

"Great!" Sokka exclaims, sarcasm dripping off every single letter. "Just keep going and we'll blow our cover completely."

"I don't think so," Aang pipes up. "Look, if Fire Nation people can airbend, then Earth Kingdom people can waterbend. If push comes to shove, we can say that your grandmother is from the Northern Water Tribe. It's not even a lie!"

Katara brightens. "Good thinking, Aang."

"Someone's coming our way!" Toph suddenly warns and I sense us all switching into camouflage mode. I check that I still have everyone's cover names handy.

"Right," Sokka resumes our conversation. "We need to find out where the nearest town with a guard post is. I'm sure all those kids were reported as missing. We can leave them to the authorities and..."

"Excuse me?" a voice interrupts and I turn around to find Laika and the firebender girl. The latter is leaning onto the former for support. She's holding her side and I spot dried blood underneath her hand. I recognize her, it's the girl I've seen with the whipped boy before.

Noticing that everyone's watching her expectantly (except for Toph), she continues, "Laika said one of you is a waterbending healer." She looks away. "I normally wouldn't ask, but my brother is fatally injured." She sighs and bows deeply at Katara. "Please, save him!"

Katara blinks, then smiles. "Of course. Where is he?"

"I'll show you," the girl answers, eyes shining with gratefulness and relief. So the boy was the girl's brother, I suppose. Turning back to the group, I massage my temples.

"This is all so messed up!" I hiss and sprawl on the ground to stare at the sky.

But I barely get the chance. "You can say that again," a voice agrees which makes me jerk right back into a sitting position.

"Judai!" I cry out, then proceed to scrutinize him. It's the first time I see him in sunlight, I realize. He's darker than I thought. He's tanned, a shade similar to Aang, maybe a tad bit darker. Red markings are lining the outsides of his arms, three streaks each. I've been dimly aware of them before, but only now I'm starting to wonder what they are. They sorta remind me of Aang's tattoos, only that those switch arm sides halfway and end in Aang's armpits. The lines on Judai's arms stretch between his wrists and shoulders. So maybe they are tattoos? Hmm...

Then there is the fact that he is _sopping_ _wet_. His dark brown hair is a bit longer than Sokka's and clings to his head in thick strands. Some stray ones hang into his face and he doggedly swipes them away, only for them to pop right back, the water weighing them down.

"You look like you badly need a hair tie," I remark, already pulling my braid to the front in order to remove my own.

"No thanks, I'm good on hair ties," Judai declares, swiping at the strands once more. Yeah, right, I'm sure he doesn't need a hair tie. "I just came here because I discovered a place nearby where a mountain stream is pooling. I suggest we move there, so everyone can have a drink and clean up."

"Sounds reasonable," Aang states and looks around inquisitively, waiting for approval. I nod, I'm totally in, and I'm relieved that Sokka nods as well.

"Let's get everybody moving."

"What about the slavers?" Judai stops him, visibly on edge. Sokka shrugs.

"Chained up. We can leave them here, they're not going to bother us."

I climb to my feet and slip past Aang to give Judai a hug. My nose quickly takes offense, but I bear it until the boy relaxes. I notice that he's taller than me, about half a head, but it doesn't feel like it at all. It feels like comforting a way smaller child who just woke up from a nightmare. At least I have experience with that, thanks to Mimi.

"It's over, Judai," I whisper soothingly. "It's over."

"I know," he sighs. "I'm not a baby, by the way. You can let go."

Toph starts to laugh in the background and I hastily pull back. Didn't mean to hurt his pride. "Yeah, right," I try to cover up my embarrassment. "I was about to, anyway. You smell like a dead wartpossum."

"Now, now, don't you pretend to smell any better, Kami!" Judai shoots right back and I find myself looking up. There is a mischievous glint in his ash-gray eyes, and I like it much, _much_ better than the despair and defeat. I want to see more of it. I want to see more of _him_.

My eye-contact problem kicks in and I turn my back at Judai, looking over the group of children instead. I also come to resent the fact that I'm wet yet again, but washing up is a good idea. The cell has been really dirty.

"Is that pool large enough for everyone? Because I think it would make more sense to move them in shifts anyway. As far as I can tell, there are less of us able to offer support than there are those who need it."

Judai hums agreement. "I think ten people can wash themselves at the same time, give or take a few, depending on height."

"Then we should move the firebenders first," Sokka suggests, arms crossed and brows furrowed in concentration. "They're worst off and it gives Kari more water to work with. After that, we'll see about the rest."

"Sounds like a plan," I nod, automatically searching for Katara in the crowd. She's easy enough to find, by now she has gathered an audience, sitting or standing in a loose circle around her.

"So I didn't imagine it. She _is_ a waterbender," Judai remarks, causing me to turn back to him.

"Water Tribe blood," I quickly smooth things over. "Sometimes, people of one nation have the bending abilities of others. It happens."

"That's weird." Judai crosses his arms. "Why would someone from the Earth Kingdom want a child from a snow sav..." I'm seriously considering to resort to foot-stomping to get him to stop talking, only that he suddenly loses balance and cuts himself off, yelping instead. I catch him in time to break his fall, mildly amused by the incident. I'm pretty certain about what has happened.

My suspicions are confirmed when Judai glares at Toph. "What was that for?"

Toph gives a mocking shrug. "I don't know. Maybe you can figure it out for me."

Aang looks slightly troubled, while Sokka gets up from his rock and pointedly turns away. "Let's get moving."

Finally, Judai looks at me quizzically. I raise a brow at him. "Sorry to say it, but you kind of deserved that."

"But..." He shakes his head, by now confused and maybe a tad bit panicky.

I give him a flick, stunning him for a split-second. "Use that brain of yours, you big dork. Some people don't like it when you insult their ancestors. Twice."

Judai winces. While Sokka seems to brush the high-hatting off well enough, in the Fire Nation, insulting someone's ancestors is reason for a feud. It barely happens anymore, but it's still a fundamental part of our culture. You just don't do it. (Unless said ancestors happen to be Air Nomad. Then it's okay. Everybody does it.)

And that's exactly why Judai ends up looking very uncomfortable. I know fully well what's going on inside him – he wonders if he should apologize. To a lowly colonial. That would require some serious pride-swallowing, and not everyone can be as messed up as me where patriotism is concerned. Besides, Toph has attacked him, so to speak. It counts as appropriate retribution. I wouldn't wonder if Judai reaches the conclusion that he and Sokka are already even, no words needed.

I leave him to his musings and follow Sokka and the rest. Aang slips through Katara's admirers to tell her about our plan, while I pick out a girl who's sitting on the stone path, leaning against the mountainside. Her midriff-baring clothes show quite a collection of scratches and cuts. She doesn't even seem to notice me, just stares right through me with empty eyes.

"Hey!" I draw her attention. She blinks and looks up. I smile encouragingly. "I'm Kamina. What's your name?"

She hesitates. "Yulika," she replies then, sounding just the way she looks – bone-tired. I stretch out my hand.

"Okay, Yulika. My friend found a pool of water nearby and we figured we should go there to drink and wash up. How would you like that?"

"Sounds good, but..." She sighs in resignation, but then her body tenses and she grabs my hand. I pull her to her feet and put an arm around her waist to keep her upright.

"Thank you," she mumbles, and it warms my heart. Helping people – such a rewarding pastime. Maybe we should do that instead of waging war.

"No problem."

* * *

 **So now we know what Judai looks like. Yay!  
(Right, I shouldn't fangirl about my own characters. I don't think it's healthy.)**

 **Details, details... Didn't expect this thing to stretch out for so long. I wanted it over and done with two chapters ago, instead, it looks like I need at least two more chapters to finish this arc. And I say _at least_ as in AT LEAST. By now, I really have no idea. It's crazy.**

 **Hope you had just as much fun reading as I had writing. Because I had plenty. ^-^**


	19. Scarred

**And the next chapter is done. Yay!**

* * *

Maneuvering the children proves easier than initially thought. My assumption about having more children in need of support than supporters is true, but things work out anyway and soon, we're camped around a nice pond filled by a waterfall. The water is cold, but clean and some of the kids eagerly dunk their heads into the pool, gulping it down in gallons. I'm all for a pot of tea, really, but I guess you have to take what you can get.

It turns out that Judai's offhand comment about finding a mango tree hasn't been an empty promise, either. Apparently, he found the pond precisely for that reason. He takes Aang and a few others with him (though not before I talked him into taking my hair tie and restoring his topknot), and when they come back, they're loaded with mangoes and various other fruits like papayas or pineapples, which are quickly distributed among the kids.

I'm sitting with Sokka, Toph and Katara, who is taking a break. The worst injuries have been taken care of and she really deserves it. Toph has bent a bench, but I prefer sitting on the ground, legs crossed. Judai and Aang soon join me.

"That mango of yours doesn't look too ripe," I remark, watching my newest friend peel his loot. He shrugs.

"Do I look like I care?" he retorts and pointedly bites into the suspiciously whitish flesh. "Some of us are hungry, you know? Besides, it's sweeter than it looks."

"If you say so..."

I share a papaya with Toph, Aang and Katara are munching away on a pineapple, while Sokka goes for a banana and vows to have some meat later.

We eat in silence for a while (Man, this is some good papaya!), until Judai decides to speak up, "I don't think I have thanked you properly yet." He lowers his mango into his lap and stares at it. "I never thought I'd say this about colonials, but you guys are pretty amazing."

I find Sokka, Katara and Aang sharing looks, seemingly unsure how to take this. Toph reacts with a sort of dull surprise.

"Yeah, my club of oddballs," I agree with mixed feelings. Fondness and amusement, but sadness, too. "Earthbender," (Or more like Avatar.) "metalbender, waterbender, kid warrior..."

"Hey, I'm sixteen!" Sokka takes offense.

"But you certainly didn't start training with sixteen!" I shoot back. I mean, I haven't really seen him in action yet, but as far as the glimpses I got are concerned, Sokka is no rookie. "You guys really are amazing," I finish quietly. What am I doing with the likes of them? I'm not worthy.

An elbow in my side snaps me out of it. "Come on, don't sell yourself short!" Judai grins encouragingly. "You're pretty amazing yourself!"

His eyes are shining with admiration, and in spite of myself, I feel a smile sneaking up my face. "Well, I guess no one can fake death as beautiful as me," I concede with a soft laugh.

"Tell me about it! You really had me scared in there."

I rub the back of my head sheepishly. "Yeah, sorry about that..."

"Fake death?" Aang cuts in, looking at me quizzically. I blink at him, a bit confused. He doesn't know about that? He's an airbending master, he should. Although, come to think about it... Maybe the Air Nomads didn't have the knowledge of the human body that the Fire Nation has? But still, how is he alive after he was declared dead, if not that way? So weird...

I put down my papaya-half and raise my hands. "You see, if someone wants to know whether or not an unconscious person is alive, they check for breathing and heartbeat. And to a degree, you can control your heartbeat with your breathing. The slower you breathe, the slower your heartbeat. That means, if you breathe very slowly, your heart rate slows with it. Everything left is hoping that the checker hits an interval between two breaths and beats and doesn't stick around long enough to catch the next."

"Wow," Aang marvels, eyes wide and alight. "That's amazing!" Then his face falls. "But it doesn't sound healthy. Are you alright?"

"I'm good, thanks for asking. And really, it wasn't that amazing. I was just improvising," I try to ward off the praise. It always makes me feel conflicted, like I don't deserve it, but want to accept it anyway.

"Well, maybe you should improvise more, Fireflake," Toph comments teasingly, causing me to chuckle awkwardly. This is not helping. Seriously!

"It surely sounds like quite a story," Katara chimes.

"Yeah, I want to hear about it as well," Judai agrees. "What did I miss? _How_ did you _do it?_ "

"Uh..." I mumble, unsure about what to say. I like Judai, he's nice. (Alright, he's a bigot, but I started that way, too. I can't blame him for getting eaten up by the propaganda.) Still, he can't know I'm an airbender. "Yeah, I just... pretended to be dead, and then there were the doctor and the earthbender, and I sorta did a sneak attack on them, then I ran into swordwoman who recaptured me and brought me to registry-guy, where I managed to break free and hit them over the head with registry-guy's chair. Then I got you guys out and then Kuzon and the rest showed up."

The general reaction consists of thoroughly weirded out expressions.

"That..." Judai drawls, "raises more questions than it answers."

"I'm sorry, okay?!" I yell, at the verge of panic. I don't know how much more probing I can handle. But the shock on Judai's face quickly yanks me back to reality, causing me to hug my knees in shame. "I'm sorry. But I don't really know what I did, either. It all went so fast..."

It's not even a lie. I mean, I know what happened, I was there. But I don't know _how_ it happened, _why_ the air suddenly did what I wanted it to do. And I certainly don't believe I could do it again. I need to discuss this whole thing with Aang, the sooner the better.

"Well, that settles it," Sokka saves me in the end. I think he knows what's going on. "Judai, you seem to know your way around here. What do you think is the best course of action?"

Judai chokes on his mango with surprise. "Me?!"

"Do you see any other Judais around?" Toph quips, causing the boy to get his act together and roll his eyes. I want to tell him not to mind her, it makes life easier. But I'd probably regret saying such a thing.

"How would I know?" Judai retorts dryly. "It's not like I know the name of every single person around." He sighs, deflating. "I have no idea, though."

What?

"But you knew that there is a fjord about a mile west of here," Aang objects, and I think it's a valid argument. Judai quickly repels it.

"That's because I was taken here by ship." He squeezes his mango tight enough for the juices to run down his hands. I shudder, he might as well do the same with my heart. I don't know how to contain all that sympathy.

But he squares his shoulders and continues, "I can only say this much: The Kagio Channel is an important trade route and supports a lot of villages and towns along the way. It doesn't really matter which way we go, as long as we follow it, we'll definitely arrive _somewhere_. But you'll have to ask someone else if you want details."

That reminds me... Oh, stupid! I facepalm, groaning. "I've seen a village, down in the valley. Actually, you guys should have seen it, too."

"We did," Aang confirms. "But how do we know that they have a guard station?"

"It has," I insist. "Every settlement with more than one hundred inhabitants is required to have a post by law, and everything smaller than that must have messenger hawks on the ready, in case something happens. You know, like the abduction of approximately fifty children? Besides, if what Judai says is correct, the villages around here should be rather prosperous. Some soldiers will definitely be stationed there."

"Well, what do you know?" Katara smiles. "That makes things a lot easier."

"Don't get ahead of yourselves," Toph cuts in. "Even with Kari's healing, most of these kids are in no condition to travel."

How does she... Oh, never mind! I guess there is no end to what Toph can feel with that earth sense of hers.

"We need to get reinforcements," Judai responds. "The strongest of us should go down and explain what happened. Get help. With some luck, they'll even have a hospital."

There is a round of nodding.

"Fine," Sokka concludes. "I think it's best if we keep resting another while, then Kamina and Judai can lead a group to the village."

"What about you, Sora?" Judai questions. "Wanna come with us?"

Sokka waves the notion off. "Nah, I've been mistaken for a spy before. Wouldn't want to run into that problem again."

I share a puzzled look with Judai, then shrug. Sokka, a spy? I guess that's a story for another day. I mean, he probably has the capabilities, but not the looks. He wouldn't pass a closer examination.

"So, seems like a plan." I pick up my papaya again. "I trust you to hold the fort, then."

"Leave it to us, Fireflake!" Toph smirks. Why do I have the feeling that, if something occurs, she'll be the biggest troublemaker of them all?

I go for a rather pathetic imitation of a chuckle. "Ehehe... Let's hope for the best."

"You're funny," Judai remarks. "I actually thought you'd be more optimistic than that."

So, did he? I crease my brow at him, skeptic. "Do I look like an optimist to you?"

"Maybe," Judai munches around another bite of mango, so I can't tell if he's serious or not. "As far as I know, optimism is not a trait you find in someone's appearance."

Did he just say that? He really said that. And Sokka actually thinks it's amusing, if his snicker is anything to go by. Aang, Katara and me give him _The Stare_.

"What?" he defends himself. "It was funny."

"Actually..." Judai pipes up once again, "it wasn't meant to be funny."

 _The Stare_ is directed at him. He blinks.

"Wow," Toph remarks dryly, a mixture of disgust and disbelief showing on her face. "That's even worse."

Judai grimaces and devotes himself to his mango, muttering under his breath. I can barely hear him, much less make out words, but I'm pretty sure it's not the kindest stuff he's ever voiced.

I wonder if I should say something, but I'm very doubtful about his whole situation. Let's have some more papaya! Yeah, that's probably the least explosive thing to do right now.

I finish my fruit, drop the skin into a pit Toph created and get up to wash my hands in the pool. Judai joins me shortly after.

"You think Nila would come with us?" I ask, distracting myself from the urge to blow-dry my hands.

"Nah, let's not. I think she would come if we asked her, but she's needed here."

"True," I concede. We shouldn't take her away from the children who bonded with her in the cage. Even free, I don't think it's the kind of experience to shake off easily. I sigh, resignation sucking the tension from my muscles.

"You feel it's not over yet, right?" I ask Judai, who is very busy splashing his face with the cold water and then wipe it away with his arm.

"No," he finally responds, staring straight ahead across the pool. "And I don't think I ever will." He sits back and rubs his arms, as if freezing in spite of the heat. And there are those stripes again... They're pretty striking.

I only realize I've been staring when Judai hunches his shoulders and tries to cover the arm on my side with the other. Which doesn't help much because the markings line both his arms.

I look up with surprise, and my breath catches in my throat when I see his tormented expression. What is the meaning of this?!

"I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't look at me like this," he explains, strained but oh so clear.

And then it hits me. Like an anvil. How could I have been so _blind?!_ Those lines look so neat and deliberate that I mistook them for intentional. And hey, they _do_ enhance his looks! Aang's company probably influenced my perception, too. But those lines aren't tattoos. They're _scars_. And fresh ones at that.

Now, I may be a bit slow in the uptake from time to time, but I'm not stupid. I'm very well aware that elaborate patterns like three FREAKING. PARALLEL. LINES, not to mention their symmetrical reproduction, can only be accomplished if the receiver remains still, either because they don't want to move... or can't. And considering the very nature of the markings, plus the self-consciousness Judai displays, there are no doubts about which case we have here.

I remember how annoyed I was with his despondency. I feel so guilty now. It's no wonder he was so devastated. No wonder he was so anxious about leaving the slavers behind, without anyone watching them. It makes me seriously question how much of the strength I see from him is nothing more than make-believe. I mean, it's not like I can't relate. Admitted, I never had anyone cutting me up, but I did have my share of beatings and scorn. If there is something you learn from incidents like these, it's keeping your feelings in check. Fake a smile for those you don't want to worry. Suppress the tears in front of those you don't want to see you vulnerable. And hope nobody stumbles into your room in the night, while you're busy bawling your eyes out.

I wish I knew a cure for this. I want to help. But this is a wound only time will heal. I can't do much about it.

"I understand," I state plainly and get up. I misuse my tunic as a towel to dry off, then reach out to offer Judai a hand. He seems a bit taken aback at first, but then a small smile spreads on his lips and he allows me to pull him to his feet. "Now, let's make sure those slavers get safely locked behind bars, shall we?"

I'm just about to burst with happiness when Judai nods with new determination.

"Let's."

* * *

 **So naive, isn't she? Takes a lot to get scars and tattoos mixed up. (And no, that was not a spontaneous idea. They were scars all along.)**

 **Set me thinking about the airbender tattoos. I mean, ink doesn't grow. There should be a point when Aang's tattoos look all messed up and he would need to get an Air Acolyte to redo them for him. And... doesn't it hurt to get that needle stuck into you, like, over and over again? I mean, I don't have tattoos for that very reason. *shudder* Needles... The Pointed Terror. And then spread over the whole body. How could Jinora have been in such a hurry to get her tattoos?! Seriously, if I were an airbender, I'd probably mess up on purpose, just to avoid mastery.**

 **Aaaand food. I actually went and bought a mango. I can't write about food without getting hungry, it's so cruel! Mango...**


	20. So That's What Gossiping Is Like

**Sometimes, I think I should be getting a life... I mean, I have one coming, but it starts only next month.**

* * *

It's an eye-opening revelation, the scar thing. While I go around looking for people who might be willing and able to accompany Judai and me, I find more of them. Those three parallel lines with a symmetrical counterpart are a morbid kind of recurring theme. There is a boy who has been slashed across the shoulder blades in that fashion, and a girl has them on her cheeks, like warpaint.

What makes it even more disturbing is the fact that the scars actually look good on them. There must have been a really sick bastard among the slavers who went ahead and tried to make a work of art out of these kids. It makes me shudder. Where would I be if I had been tortured in that manner?

I'm certainly glad I hadn't.

Judai and me manage to assemble three other teens who feel up to the task of walking to the village I saw – the girl with the scars and two other boys. Their names are Maila, Kiran and Li Yu respectively, and Kiran even turns out to be a local. Which is good for us because he knows the fastest way down.

I expected the whole thing to be a rather silent, gloomy affair. I expected that no one would actually want to speak more than necessary. But Maila turns out to be really chatty.

"So, Kamina is your name, right?" she asks, causing me to look at her puzzled. Why is she talking to me?

"Yes?"

"I was so blown away when you strolled in with the keys all awesome and the slavers were all out like lights! Thank you so much for getting everyone out!"

Strolled in all awesome? I've been barely standing upright. I guess that girl is suffering from a perception disorder or something. Nonetheless, when I turn away, I feel all fuzzy on the inside. Maybe it's not wrong for me to feel good for accomplishing something.

"You're welcome. But I couldn't have done it without my friends." I never would have had the confidence to do such crazy stuff if I hadn't known about the gang coming for me.

"Yeah, your friends are pretty amazing, too. I never knew colonials could be so cool! Or hot!"

My face heats up when I remember the moment at the river. Oh Agni... I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thinks weird stuff like that. "Yeah, Sora is pretty hot. Kuzon is more on the cuter side, though."

"Right? And funny! Did you see all those crazy moves he made? I always thought earthbenders would be more... you know, wall-like?"

"Insistent to stay in their place and tough the storm out instead of evading?"

"Exactly!"

I chuckle. So that's what gossiping is like. Pretty fun. "Yeah, Kuzon really is one of a kind."

It takes me a moment to realize just how true the words actually ring. I was only using a common saying, but Aang literally _is_ one of a kind. Of the Air Nomad kind. Of the Avatar kind. It gives the whole comment a rather depressing note.

Maila doesn't notice. "How come that you wound up with a bunch of colonials anyway?"

Irks... I don't want to answer that question...

Loud cursing from behind saves me. Maila and I turn to Li Yu, who is hopping on one leg, face contorted into a scowl.

"What happened?" Judai inquires. He's been hanging around Kiran at the front, now the back, leaving me to deal with Maila alone. Traitor!

"Stepped on a rock or something," Li Yu grinds out, jarring me into fully realizing the way he's clothed. There are no shoes in sight. To be precise, he looks like he just rolled out of bed. What he's wearing could easily pass as a nightgown. Is it possible that he's been taken directly from his room?

"Do you need help?" I offer, but Li Yu shakes his head and carefully lowers his foot. Wait, is that _blood_ dripping to the ground?!

"I'll be fine. Other than that... Maila, are you really that dense or just pretending to be?" I raise a brow. Is he insulting the girl? "Look at Kamina again and repeat that question."

Oh Agni, he's talking about my not completely Fire Nation-esque appearance, isn't he? Before I know it, I find myself looking at the ground to hide my face.

"Appears to me you're not the most sensitive of us, either, Li Yu," Kiran points out. "I wouldn't be too proud myself if I had Earth Kingdom features."

I let out a breath I didn't even realize I've been holding and raise my head again. Earth Kingdom. Not Air Nomad. It's a sort of sad luck that nobody bothers to try and differentiate. Basically everything that's not Fire Nation is Earth Kingdom to us... them? The Air Nomads are extinct, the Southern Water Tribe at the brink of it, and the Northerners wouldn't come out from behind their walls, practically acting as Ba Sing Second. So yeah, Earth Kingdom it is. Even Sokka and Katara can pass themselves off as such.

A mortified "Oh..." from Maila snaps me out of my musings. "Sorry, Kamina."

"It's okay," I tell her, trying to play it cool. "Actually, it's pretty nice not to be mistaken for a colonial for once."

She heaves a sigh of relief. "That's good."

I smile at her and turn to Li Yu. "You good to go?"

"Actually, you can stay here and rest," Judai offers. "We can pick you up later."

"Are you crazy?! I can still walk! I won't be left behind because of a stupid rock! I'm so _done_ with staying in one place because of rocks!"

An uncomfortable silence ensues. Everyone's thinking the same thing, I'm sure. Walls... Cuffs...

Li Yu huffs. "Let's keep moving," he states and proceeds to do just that. I can see he's still hurting, though. His steps have a telltale force to them, he's trying not to let it show that he's in pain, but he tries a bit _too hard_.

Maila is quickly by his side, and just in time for his obligatory faltering. She catches him and drapes his arm around her shoulders. "Agni, you're always so stubborn," she scolds him lightly, a resigned undertone in her voice.

I snicker quietly to myself. Those two must be close. The way Li Yu called Maila dense seems to me like a brother-sister-dynamic, but they look nothing alike. Where his hair is black, hers is brown. Where his eyes are gray, hers are golden. His face is more angular, too. Childhood friends?

A part of me is jealous of them. They're just so easy around each other. I want a friend like that, too. Someone who cares deeply about me, someone I care deeply about. Someone I can spill all my worries to without fear of being judged... Someone who understands.

A tap on my shoulder makes me spin around to meet Judai's gaze.

"You gonna stare all day or what?"

He sounds amused rather than annoyed, but I feel embarrassed anyway. What was _that_ going through my head? Come on, Kami, stop being such a wuss!

I give a sheepish chuckle. "Sorry for spacing out. I was just..." I shake my head. I can't say that out loud! "Never mind."

"You do know that _that_ just makes it worse, right?"

Is he talking about my internal mess or his own curiosity? Probably both.

Judai sighs, signaling that he doesn't expect an answer. "It's okay, though. I guess it's not my business, with us barely knowing each other and all..."

He crosses his arms behind his head and turns away, ready to leave me alone with my thoughts. I want to slap myself. He picked up on my true feelings, even though I'm trying so hard to... hide... them?

 _You want him to see_ , a tiny, treacherous voice calls me out. _You want him to break your wall, just the way you wanted to open up to Katara back at the market._

It can't happen. I can't be so selfish and burden others with my problems. They've got enough to do with their own. What's my petty jealousy compared to slavery? What's dealing with Hide compared to dealing with a war-torn world? I just can't go around wasting everyone's time.

But there is something else I can do. I reach out and tug at Judai's robe to get his attention back. Not the best of ideas, now I'm feeling like a little kid. Well done, Kami, once again.

But it does get me the desired result: Judai turns his head, looking at me quizzically. "Hmm?"

I smile at him. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For asking. For caring."

"Whoa, don't go all sappy on me there," he responds, positively baffled. His arms drop to his sides and he swings around completely. "I mean, feels nice to be appreciated and all, but you don't have to thank me for it. It's a matter of course."

"I don't have to, but that doesn't mean I can't, right?" I point out. It's not like it's a crime to show that you're appreciating someone.

Judai shifts a bit. "I guess there is that..." he concedes when someone clears their throat somewhere.

I whip around to find Kiran, looking plenty annoyed. "You two lovebirds done yet?"

"Maybe we should leave _those two_ behind," Maila jests, grinning cheekily. "Give them some privacy."

I cross my arms and stare her down. Since she's not actually trying to hold the gaze, it doesn't really count as eye contact.

"You're hilarious," Judai deadpans next to me.

"Super hilarious," I agree in exactly the same tone. I mean, seriously, what was that? I barely know Judai, why would I be interested in him?

Maila's lips curl into a pout. "Aww, neither of them is blushing. How boring."

"Maila..." Li Yu warns his friend, still leaning on her. She shuts up, thankfully.

"Can we get a move on now?" Kiran complains.

"Yup," Li Yu nods hastily, before anyone can decree otherwise.

"Finally." Kiran turns around. "This way."

I share a look with Judai. "Can you believe her?" I groan, rolling my eyes.

"Teenage girls," he sighs, and I suppress a giggle when his voice cracks right in the middle of 'teenage'. Such delicious irony! He can't be bothered though, just continues, "Always coupling people who feel no attraction whatsoever."

I probably should be taking offense, but I see his point. "Makes me embarrassed to be one myself."

Judai laughs, reminding me what a sweet sound it is. Loud, clear, happy. Makes me wanna join right in, and I can't help smiling.

"Yeah," he snickers. "But it's good to know that there are still sane girls out there. It means I don't have to date my grandma after all."

"Your grandma?" I snort, exploding into laughter myself.

"Well, she's not a teenage girl, right?"

"True!"

I take a deep breath, fighting down the urge to keep guffawing. When it's broken down to a beam, I realize the rest of the group is seriously leaving us behind and bound after them, Judai hot on my heels.

"Why, look who decided to join us!" Maila immediately falls back into teasing.

"Oh, shut up, Maila!" Judai retorts.

"You're just jealous because we have much more fun without you!" Yeah, I can tease people, too. And darn good it feels! Not so much the teasing itself, though. I mean, that's fun as well (Bad Kami!), but it's more about the fact that I'm comfortable with it, well and truly comfortable. Only my mum and Mimi give me the same feeling, and teasing _them_ has become increasingly boring. People tend to become immune.

"Come on, guys!" Kiran grumbles. "At least _try_ to be decent Fire Nation citizens for once."

"Aw, lighten up, Kiran!" Li Yu protests. "We're free! We don't have to pay attention to our words anymore. Enjoy it!"

"I'll enjoy it once those slavers are safely locked away."

I share a look with the other three, then raise my hands in defeat. If Kiran wants to be a killjoy so badly, then there's nothing we can do. And so we just keep moving. Maila drags Li Yu down the path. Judai has his arms crossed behind his head again. I wonder if it's a habit, that he's so out of it that he doesn't even realize he's showing off the scars he was so intent on hiding just some twenty-odd minutes ago. At least I don't think he has shaken off the inhibition so fast.

But they do look cool, almost outrageously so. He's pretty muscular, too, despite the indefinite period of time spent inactive in a cage. He has that rural feeling about him, someone who works a lot, out in the sun. I bet with a real bathtub, a good washrag and a ton of scented soap, he would... Oh Agni, stop it, stupid fantasy! I'm playing right into Maila's hands here!

Would it be so bad, though? Unlike Sokka, Judai actually is Fire Nation.

I rub my forehead, groaning in discomfort. That's exactly where the catch lies. I'm an airbender. The second he finds out, he'd turn away. No doubt about that.

I never really thought about relationships before. Falling in love, marrying, having a family... That's about as outlandish a concept as friendship was to me before all this. It's just not gonna happen.

"You alright?" Judai pulls me back to reality. I wince in shock. I was really far gone on this one.

I pull myself together, push the depressing thoughts to the back of my mind and concentrate on my new friend, so I don't have to lie when I say, "I'm fine. It's just..." I wave a hand. "Your scars." Yeah, they kicked off that thought train.

"Oh..." Judai hums and lowers his arms, once again rubbing them up and down as if he could make the markings disappear that way. "I suppose I'll be wearing long sleeves for a while."

He fakes a laugh. It's a pitiful attempt at a joke, an understatement which couldn't be more soul-crushing if he tried. I can't leave things like this!

"Can I say something?"

"That sounds like I shouldn't say yes."

I shrug. "It's like you said: We barely know each other. I have no idea how you'd react to the stuff ghosting through my mind."

Judai narrows his eyes, scrutinizing me. I tilt my head, trying to ignore the burning sensation that kind of examination always causes in me.

"Well then, let's find out together, shall we?"

I'm not sure if I like that tone. It doesn't sound too optimistic. Not condemning, either, but... hmm...

"About those scars..." I purse my lips. I'm not gonna say they look handsome, no need for Judai to label me as superficial right off the bat. Besides, it's still disturbing. "It probably sounds weird to say, but I don't think you need to be ashamed of them. I get that they're a painful memory. Believe me, I know what it feels like to carry around a permanent reminder of how for all intents and purposes, I should be dead. But try to look at it this way: You're here now, right? You pulled through. You're strong. And the scars are a testimony to that strength. Whoa!"

Of course, that one time I actually _try_ to break out of the loser role, my performance must be ruined. I bump into Maila and stumble backward, sliding my feet into a balanced stance.

"Sorry!"

"What, Judai not enough for you?" she quips, but this time, her heart isn't in it. I can hear that much. It doesn't help that she proceeds to turn away and rub her scarred cheek with her free hand. "You know, I couldn't help overhearing what you said. I know it wasn't meant for me, but still... Thank you. You're pretty wise."

Am I? I only spend my nights contemplating the unfairness of the universe and reading a few too many scrolls... Can you call that wisdom?

"Uhm, you're welcome, I guess?"

I direct my gaze at Judai, silently pleading for help. Which I don't get.

"Hey, don't look at me like this! You brought this on yourself!" he protests, before his eyes soften and he adds warmly, "But I want to thank you, too."

"There's no need for that. As long as it helps..." A good deed is its own reward, right?

I'm taken aback when Judai suddenly starts to laugh. "Look at us, telling each other off about using the term 'thank you'."

"Yeah, who needs politeness anyway?" Maila happily joins in. I have to grin, too. Judai kind of nailed it, in a way which easily dispelled the awkwardness.

"Totally overrated," I catch myself chuckling.

"Oh, dear," Li Yu pipes up, rolling his eyes. "You three are just _perfect_. Would you mind paying attention to our guide for a change?"

Three pairs of eyes fly to Kiran, who's very busy not stopping for us. That guy must have some serious destination issues, stoically following the path where the trees are starting to thin out. A few more steps are enough to reveal fields of plants I can't identify (Ignorant city girl alert!), and there, in the distance beyond the rows of stems and stalks... _Houses!_

It's the village! We're here!

* * *

 **So, this is one of the longer chapters. At first, I wanted to make the cut about 800 words earlier, but my brain wouldn't stop firing off lines to write. I'm glad I included Kiran, I'm not sure where this would have ended if it weren't for him dragging everyone along.**

 **Something about the last chapter I forgot (again): The Kagio Channel has a super creative name. I named it after the Japanese word for trade, which is "kagyou". I avatarized it a bit.**

 **"Hehe, let the shipping commence!"  
It became one of my favorite lines when I did an ATLA marathon with my bestie, who, as opposed to me, is an avid Zutara shipper. (Yeah, look at this: A Zutarian and a Kataanger can be best friends! Surprise, surprise!) We'd always say it when there was something which could be perceived as a Zutara moment.  
So yeah, Judai and Maila here... Did I offend any sensitive shipper hearts? Because yes, Judai's comment about teenage girls coupling people without any chemistry whatsoever was a jab at overzealous shippers (including myself, I'm not gonna pretend otherwise). Of course, the male population can be just as guilty, but for some reason, it's mostly girls.  
I usually don't write romance, but when I do, I prefer Slow Burn. The times I actually try to write Fluff always turn out overladen with cliches and super cheesy, no exceptions. I tend not to look at those texts twice. ^^"  
So I'm not gonna do it here. Too fast. Couple Development is a delicate issue and must be handled accordingly. (Which is what I love about Kataang. And Maiko, and Kainora. And love-hate about Makorra. Ohhhh, the shipping, the shipping...)  
**

 **And last, but not least: Someone may explain to me where the thought comes from that the scars could be self-inflicted. I mean, I considered the possibility that people could consider the possibility, and I also know that there is only so much I can do in First Person POV to ascertain otherwise, but it still has me puzzled. I wonder if I should re-write the 19th chapter?**


	21. Reunions and a Bunch of Scrolls

**I'm feeling fast. I don't know why, but I do.**

* * *

There is no holding Kiran anymore. We quickly find out where his destination fever came from, and to be honest... I feel stupid. I could have figured it out earlier.

So, we've been chasing the boy through the village, and I was wondering where he leads us to, because the house he singled out as his goal didn't even look remotely like a guard post.

It's simple, though. He knocked at the door, impatiently bouncing up and down in his spot and muttering "Come on! Come on!" just loud enough to be heard around my position. Then the door was opened by a woman bearing more than a passing resemblance to him. Same black hair, same brown eyes, same round face. Before I could process the whole thing, he jumped into her arms, crying. And the woman joined right in.

"Kiran! Thank Agni you're okay!"

Yup, that's it, folks. Kiran told us he lives here. So it makes sense that his family lives here, too. Really, stupid! But at least I'm not the only one. While the rest of us puts some politeness distance between ourselves and the overjoyed family reunion (father and a little sister appear soon enough in the door frame), Li Yu whispers, "And here I thought he was just being a jerk."

"Yeah..." I whisper back. "Turns out we've been the jerks all along for keeping him."

"Didn't see that coming," Maila states, and Judai shakes his head.

"Me neither."

"Club of idiots, anyone?" I remark, with a feeling of defeat instead of the shame I suppose I should be having. There's just the fact that I find some comfort with the knowledge that I'm not the only candelabra-head around.

Else, I'm just glad when I turn back to the scene, with Kiran being all but buried in a group hug and the participants mumbling stuff I can't hear, but clearly filled with happiness. It's just really sweet.

"We've done it," I hear Judai's voice out of the blue and spin around to face him. His gaze is trained at Kiran, so he probably hasn't been talking to me, but still.

"What do you mean?"

He flashes me a sidelong glance before focusing on the family again. "I mean we've been out for a while, but it's only now that I fully realize it." His hands clench into fists, causing me to frown. But I don't interrupt. "You know, all this time, I felt like some part of me was still locked in that cage. It's gone now."

I smile, that explanation makes me happy for him. "That's good."

He hums and crosses his arms behind his head again. Yup, definitely a habit. I tear my gaze away from my friend and look around the village. Just as assumed, it seems like a relatively wealthy place. The houses are made from stone where most villages have huts from wood. The street is gravel (which Li Yu keeps moaning about, and I really can't blame him), but I remember the main street to be cobbled. We came across it while running after Kiran.

I also notice some neighbors peeking out of their houses or blatantly gathering around. I'm getting increasingly uncomfortable with the gawkers and catch myself sliding behind Judai, for want of a better hiding spot.

Then a girl shoulders her way through the circle, sweaty and disheveled, and obviously in a hurry. She yells Kiran's name, grabbing at first his attention, then the rest of him. I can almost hear his bones crack from the hug.

"You're alive!" the girl cries for the whole village to hear, while the poor boy looks just about ready to fall apart.

"Not for long," he grunts and the girl jumps back, almost tripping over her own two feet. She seems just about to apologize, but Kiran quickly follows up, enveloping her in a less bone-crushing hug and planting a kiss on her lips. Which she eagerly returns.

I can just gape at the scene unfolding in front of my eyes. Girlfriend. Lo and behold, that dead serious guy has a girlfriend. Who knew?

My brother would turn away with a disgusted look on his face. (And Kiran's sister certainly does. I hope Maila will get off Judai's and my back now and pester him instead.) A few years earlier, I would have done the same thing. But these days, I'm mostly like: Meh. I couldn't care less. As far as I'm concerned, people are free to smooch wherever they want, even if it just so happens to be in the family door frame.

As soon as they break apart, the girl utters in a thick, breathy voice, "I thought I lost you." She is visibly shaken and overflowing with emotions.

"I'm home now," Kiran mutters soothingly, or at least I think so. He talks a good deal quieter than the girl. After that, the circle of onlookers is set into motion when more people break out of it to welcome the teen home. Give him hugs, slap him on the back, or just give a nod and receive a bow in return, in case of the eldest. Maila, Li Yu, Judai and me are skillfully ignored. Which I don't really mind, however, Maila does. At some point, she gets fed up and stalks over to Kiran.

"Hate to interrupt, but..." She jerks her thump at Li Yu. "Some help over here?"

"Oh, right..." At least Kiran has the decency to look abashed. "Sure. I'm sorry I got carried away."

Maila gives his arm a reassuring squeeze. "It's okay. We're happy for you, too."

She earns a suspicious glare from Kiran's girlfriend for her troubles, but she doesn't even see it. Just as well. Kiran waves us over, so my Judai-shield walks out on me to grab Li Yu instead. Maaan!

I plod after them, reluctantly joining the now very large door frame community. Well, at least they make a path so we get through without problems. The red footprints Li Yu is leaving on the gravel probably help, it's alarming how much his condition seems to have worsened. Kiran's mother is instantly on the spot.

"Oh my goodness," she breathes in shock. "Come on in, dearie! Kiran, show your friends to the bathroom, I'll bring some ointment and bandages!"

"I'm on it, mum!" He gestures into the house. "This way."

"No need to make such a fuss," Li Yu grumbles, but Maila has another opinion on the matter.

"You wanna catch an infection and lose your foot instead?"

That silences him. I can't really judge from the back of Li Yu's head, but I'd say he's still not happy with Judai and Maila dragging him around. Not exactly sure what to think about the scene, I resort to shrugging my shoulders and following them. I don't really want to stay outside where the gazes of the whole neighborhood bore into my back. Still, shouldn't we be finding the guard post? It's not like we're so badly needed for Li Yu to get medical attention. I can imagine that Kiran and Maila would like to stick around, the former with his family, the latter with her injured friend. But Judai and me are pretty much useless here, and I'd rather not spend more time at this place than absolutely necessary.

I awkwardly hang around a corner of the hallway, avoiding family members, while Judai drops Li Yu off at the bathroom. I've rarely been more grateful than when he joins me afterwards, leaving Maila and Kiran (who's trailed by both his sister and his girlfriend) to do their thing.

"A copper piece for your thoughts?"

"There's not much to say." I catch myself fiddling around with my hair. It's been a while since I've done that, but now that Judai has my tie, I'm not wearing it fixed tightly in a braid anymore. Which is a pretty odd feeling. "I'm just not that good with new people, you know?"

"Oh, come on!" Judai groans in response. "Who was the one who went out of her way to get me to talk, hmm?"

"That was different," I claim, refusing to look at him and checking my nails instead. Not that I actually see them. "It was such a dismal place, so dark and dingy, and I just needed to fill the silence. It was much more horrible than anything you could have said."

I catch movement from the corner of my eyes, but I don't bother looking up.

"Well, I guess that counts."

"So, what now? We got a little sidetracked on our mission."

"And rightfully so."

"I didn't deny that. It's just... the others are waiting for us and we can't afford to stay here for too long."

Noise makes me swivel around to the bathroom door. Kiran is just stepping through it and the open door wouldn't block Li Yu's struggle anymore.

"Look at the bright side!" I can hear the voice of Kiran's mother. "Now you've got all these beautiful ladies all to yourself!"

Wait, even Kiran's sister? And his _girlfriend?!_

Kiran slams the door shut and leans against it, groaning and rolling his eyes. "I'm embarrassed to be related to that woman," he mutters just loud enough for Judai and me to hear.

"Don't say that," Judai urges, friendly but firmly. "You just got her back."

Kiran sighs. "I guess you're right." He pushes himself off the door and pads over to us. "Is there a problem that you're standing in this dark corner?"

"This is Kami's waiting spot of choice," Judai defends, pointing at me with something akin to amusement. "I'm just here to keep her company."

Not feeling any need to explain myself, I go straight to the point, "I think we should get moving. We need to find the guard station and tell them what happened."

"So now you're suddenly in a hurry," Kiran complains, crossing his arms and eyeing me with furrowed brows. My cheeks start burning.

"Uh... sorry?" I offer meekly, and Kiran shakes his head.

"Don't worry about it, my father already went to fetch someone. You two just go to the living room, okay? I'll make some tea."

"Thank you, Kiran," Judai says and I raise a brow hearing it. Taking stuff for granted, are we?

"Can I help you with it?" I ask, but Kiran just shrugs.

"I'll be fine. Come on!"

He herds us into a spacious room, brightly lit by two large windows. A cozy fireplace makes up a part of the wall, a tapestry of the Fire Nation symbol above and a fluffy wool rug laid out in front of it, with a low table on top. A corner is occupied with a sofa and a higher, but smaller table covered in scrolls, a closet is standing next to the reading corner(?). A second door leads to the kitchen.

I'd say Kiran's family isn't the wealthiest I've ever seen, but they're definitely not too badly off, either.

"Make yourself at home," Kiran tells us and disappears into the kitchen. Judai takes the chance to stretch out next to the table on the wool rug, while I walk over to the other table.

"Can I look at those scrolls?" I call out for Kiran.

"Knock yourself out!" comes the response, and I go right ahead and browse through the paper. There is some history stuff like _Breaching Ba Sing Se_ or _Avatar Roku_ , and also some stories. The classic _Love Amongst The Dragons_ , now a bit discredited due to the appearance of the Blue Spirit, who used a mask from the play to hide his face. Also _The Tale of Liko_ , a story about a nonbender guy named Liko (obviously), who strives to become the best warrior of the Fire Nation, then _Loves and Legends_ , a cheesy romance I never got past the first couple lines no matter how hard I tried (my mum loves it), a scroll which is simply labeled _Bedtime Stories_... Plenty of stuff. There is even a book among them, apparently some sort of diary. Still rather rare objects, those books, but I believe that, given another couple years, they'll replace scrolls entirely.

Nothing really catches my interest, apart from the scroll about Avatar Roku perhaps, but I don't think I should start this one now. Besides, it's probably chucked full of propaganda.

Oh, the High Dragons have mercy... When did I become so suspicious?

"You're into reading?" Judai's voice rips me out of my musings. I look up and find him watching me, still lying on the wool rug, but with the upper body hoisted up on his arms.

"Sure am!" I reply enthusiastically. "I recognize a lot of these. I think this is my favorite." I flourish a certain scroll. "It's called _Dragonheart._ It's about a girl who was raised by dragons, but then there is an epidemic which..."

"Epiwhatnow?" Judai cuts in, sounding almost offended by the word. I blink at him, thoroughly puzzled.

"An epidemic. A disease which spreads widely and quickly." Why doesn't he know that?

"Right..." Judai drawls, still somewhat sarcastically. "Can you use that the next time?"

"What?"

"Words that ordinary mortals such as myself can actually understand."

Everything I manage is standing there in flustered silence.

"Look," Judai sighs, putting his palms together to form an arrow. The scathing tone has vanished from his voice. "I don't know about you, but I'm just a simple peasant who went to school for four years, and waving one of these overly long texts around is a sure-fire way to drive me off."

"What are you trying to say?" I ask cautiously. Scroll still in hand, I walk over to Judai and flop down next to him. "You _can_ read, right?"

The boy in question has sat up by now, but his slouched posture speaks of discomfort. "Yes," he puts most of my worries to rest, but the way he draws out the 's' almost into a hiss is still rather unsettling. So I wait for him to continue, which he does after a few seconds.

"I can read, I can write, but I don't like it. I prefer watching a play or listen to a storyteller when one is in town."

I chuckle. "Hey, you know 'prefer'!" I point out, cheering on the inside. "I always considered that one rather fancy."

Judai gives a noncommittal hum and shrugs. "Well, it's not like I don't know anything at all. It's just that I'm not a walking wordbook."

"Dictionary," I correct teasingly and earn a playful punch against the shoulder.

"Oh no, you won't!"

"Whatever you say, Master Wordbook!"

It's only when I hear a strange voice giggle that I realize that we're not alone anymore. I catch sight of Kiran's girlfriend, _and by Agni_ , my face must be on fire!

"You two are enjoying yourselves, I see," she comments with what seems to be genuine gladness. "Do you know where Kiran got stranded?"

"Uh..." I make, stretching for the kitchen door. "Last time I checked, he was in there." I frown when I stretched far enough to spot an empty room. "Only that he isn't."

"Well, last time _I_ checked," Judai stresses, "he left the kitchen and went somewhere, but I have no idea where. How's Li Yu doing?"

"Loud," the girl complains, and I feel her. "But he'll be fine, Mei is bandaging his foot right now."

"So Mei is Kiran's mother?" I ask, mostly for confirmation. Which is why the answer takes me by surprise.

"His sister, actually. But she's really good at it, despite her age."

"I'll... take your word for it," I drawl, unsure about the image in my head. "What's your name, by the way?"

"I'm Lori," she introduces herself sunnily. "And you are?"

"My name is Kamina, and this is Judai," I announce, causing my friend to roll his eyes to the heavens.

"I'm perfectly capable of saying my own name, you know?"

Okay... Didn't see that coming. "Sorry?"

"Agni, you're hopeless," Judai sighs, and this time, there is no playful undertone. He gets up and smooths out his robe. "I'll check on the stove. Can't have a fire in here because Kiran doesn't know how to boil tea properly."

And with that, he's gone, leaving me confused and a bit scared. Did I... miss something? A signal I went too far?

Did I push him away?

* * *

 **Haaah... Check, double-check, out.**

 **Candelabra-head is... not exactly an insult I came up with myself. Candelabra is a rather common euphemism for 'idiot' in my country, and I thought it fitted the Fire Nation, theme-wise. So I just rolled with it when it sprang to mind while writing, I think it's fun. ^-^**

 **Else... Gaang drought? I already miss Sokka, hahaha! ^^"  
But I love my little Fire Nation babies, too. We mostly see the high society in the series (plus the school and Jang Hui), and it's fun to mess around with the lower classes. I imagine the Fire Nation to be a country with a real good education system, but it gets problematic when students don't have time to attend because they've got other stuff to do.  
**

 **Oh yeah, world building! Always a pleasure!**


	22. What The Future Brings

**Internet! I've got Internet connection!**

* * *

I'm not entirely sure how it happened. I just needed an excuse to avoid asking Judai what exactly I did to him, being the awkward – and, I admit it, cowardly – person I am, so I buried my nose in the _Dragonheart_ scroll. Lori asked what I was reading. I told her, she was interested, and I read the first couple lines to her. Then the first couple lines grew into the first chapter.

The next time I checked, I realized I've ended up with an audience.

Really, I have no idea. I look around, taking in the way my surroundings have changed while I was off to the _Dragonheart_ universe. Kiran is back, cleaned up and in a new outfit. Which makes sense, seeing how dirty and ripped beyond fixing his old one was. He's very busy sitting shoulder to shoulder with Lori. His sister Mei got comfortable on his other side. Maila and a freshly patched up Li Yu found their place on the corner sofa, snacking away on some fire gummies. Judai somehow bounced back to my side, which is about the most inexplicable.

"Did... something happen?" I express my confusion, a little overwhelmed by the sudden impact of attention.

"Nope," Li Yu speaks up from the sideline. "Carry on."

"But while we're at it..." This time, it's Judai, and he's waving a hand across the table in a summoning gesture. "Pass the fire flakes Kiran, will ya? You're not eating any of it and they're getting cold."

"Doesn't matter," Kiran retorts and uses his free hand to push a bag of fire flakes in front of Mei. "Would you do the honors, sis?"

The maybe-ten-year-old rolls her eyes. "I'm not your personal heater."

"It's for our guests," Kiran mock pleads, causing the girl to sigh.

"Fine!" she grumbles and lets her hand hover above the bag. She inhales and tilts her hand swiftly, creating a whirl of fire to warm up the fire flakes. Then she slides the bag over to Judai, who receives it with a pleased "Thank you very much."

The only adjective I can think of to describe the scene is... _bizarre_. I mean, what did just happen? It's like a theater here!

I decide I'm better off not questioning it and keep reading, but before I get to it, Kiran's mother enters the room through the kitchen door, tray in hand.

"Who wants some tea?"

"Me!" Mei raises her hand, causing a wave of chuckles to ripple through the group.

"Well, I'm not gonna refuse, either," Lori agrees.

"I think the question is not who wants tea, but who doesn't," Kiran remarks. "Anyone?"

Silence, only filled by the rustling of paper. I roll up the scroll and place it on the table.

"I guess that settles it."

Lori pokes Kiran's shoulder. "Don't be such a smug viperbat about it."

The boy can't be bothered. "Aw, why? You know you love it," he states in a tone which gives me the chills. It makes me seriously question the couple's age. That, and Lori's taste in guys. Well, every Dragon Emperor has his Empress... But really, if it weren't for the circumstances, Kiran would be the kind of person I'd keep at arm's length. Or more like 40 feet away. Preferably 100.

"Yuck!" Mei pretty much sums the whole situation up. "Get a room, for Agni's sake!"

"Kiran, your father could show up with the guards any second now," the mother joins the warning session. "Behave yourself."

Kiran grumbles, but he lets it go. Maila and Li Yu have their tea by now, and the woman walks over to our table. She puts down the tray, then sits and hands out the remaining cups. A string of thanks follows, but the drink is still scalding hot. Which is why I go for a generous helping of fire flakes first, before Judai completely cleans out the bag. He's been steadily crunching them down, perfectly unfazed by the things happening around him.

"You know, you have a good voice," Maila remarks. "I think you would do great as a traveling storyteller."

"Uh... thanks? I guess..." I reply doubtfully. "But I'm not sure if that's the kind of thing I want to do. Having no actual home, I mean... I'm not a nomad."

Even while saying it, I wonder how much truth the words are containing. It's something of a stock phrase, the last word I ever wanted to be associated with is 'nomad'. But the thing is, if I hadn't been traveling with Aang, I never would have ended up here. The teens around me would still be locked in a dark cave, fated to growing up in slavery. If they got the chance to grow up at all.

Maybe, traveling places where some help is needed wouldn't be such a bad thing to do for a living. However, I don't think it's possible as long as I can't make use of my powers freely.

"Do you guys have any plans for the future?" I deflect the focus, looking around.

Maila is the first to answer, "I want to study in the capital and become a teacher."

"A teacher?" I suddenly have to think of Mrs. Kwan, the strictest history teacher in the history of history teachers (har har). Or Mr. Jing. Or the headmaster. I can't imagine perky Maila in that role. "I never would have guessed that."

"Life is full of surprises," Li Yu smirks and Maila elbows him into the side in retribution.

"What's that supposed to mean, heh?"

"Nothing," he replies innocently before shifting his attention back to the whole group. "I plan to join the army. I will give all my strength to the Fire Nation! Plus, it's a secure income."

"I wouldn't bet on that," Kiran remarks. "The Earth Kingdom has fallen. So has the Avatar." I grit my teeth at that, and I feel my fingers curl into fists. I force myself to relax before anyone notices.

Kiran for his part continues without interruption, "After a century, we're finally nearing victory. I think it'll be over before you're old enough to fight."

"I can still become a soldier!"

"Calm down, Li!" Maila cuts in, placing a hand on her friend's shoulder. "Of course you can. Kiran is just saying that it might not be what you're expecting."

Li Yu huffs and leans back into the sofa, crossing his arms. I make a mental note to never make a remark about the army in his vicinity, that's obviously a hot button. Even Kiran looks slightly shocked.

"What about you, Judai?" Lori changes the subject, distracting from the explosive mixture her boyfriend and Li Yu have become. "Any plans?"

My seat neighbor shrugs. "There is not much to plan. The Kalai inn belongs to my grandmother, which I'll take over when..." He trails off, opting to just wave his hand instead. We all know what he means anyway, and it's understandable that he feels uncomfortable with saying it out loud.

So he's got his future planned out for him rather than deciding for himself. Hmm... I wonder if he's satisfied with it. And also how it goes together with what he told me before. Can you run an inn when you're only partially literate? I kind of doubt that.

A soft laugh snaps me out of it and I glance at Kiran's mother. "You children are still young. You shouldn't worry too much. Besides..." She smiles encouragingly. "I'm sure you all have a bright future to look forward to."

Bright future, huh? If only she knew...

I blow at my tea, sneaking in some airbending to hasten the process. First reading, then talking... my throat is starting to protest. Nothing like a cup of tea for relief, and an excuse to abstain from any kind of comment.

"Great tea!" Mei compliments out of the blue, already slurping the liquid. I blink at her in disbelief. How can she drink that stuff? It's boiling hot, for Agni's sake!

"Thanks," comes the reply with Judai's voice and I shift my gaze at him. I mean, _what?!_ I thought Kiran made it! Or his mother! Boy, I've been missing out on _a lot_.

"Mei, you're incredible," Lori remarks. "I can't even take a sip without torching my tongue!"

The girl in question shrugs nonchalantly. "It gives you a nice warm feeling in your tummy," she offers as a super helpful non-explanation.

Then I hear the door open.

"I'm home!" a voice sounds through the house which I immediately apply to Kiran's father. "And I brought two guests!"

I almost collide with Judai when everyone shoots to their feet. Everyone except Kiran's mother, that is, who goes about it in a much more relaxed manner.

I take a step back, away from Judai. Just in time, as a man and a woman walk in, their uniforms unambiguously marking them as soldiers. I give a quick bow, glad to note that I don't headbutt Judai by doing so.

"Welcome!" Kiran's mother greets. "Please have a seat. May I offer some tea?"

"Thank you, that's very friendly," the woman responds, while Kiran, Mei and Lori are already shifting to make room, relinquishing their side of the table to the two guards. The two lovebirds flop down at the end of the table instead, while Mei leaves altogether and Kiran's parents sit on the sofa, the part of the corner which isn't occupied by Li Yu and Maila.

I find myself kneeling across the woman guard and not liking it one bit. I chew on my lower lip nervously, staring at my fists resting on my thighs. Which at least are hidden from her sight, thank the table!

I send a silent prayer to the High Dragons, pleading not to be recognized, not to get asked awkward questions. Why didn't I just stick with the gang? Because it would have looked suspicious.

But more suspicious than now?

"Are you alright, girl?" the man asks kindly, catching me off-guard. I pause my lip-chewing for a moment.

"I'm fine," I grind out, forcing myself to raise my head and fake a smile before I drop my gaze again. Agni help me, how am I supposed to get through this?

A feeling of warmth startles me and I find one of Judai's hands covering my fist, giving it a reassuring squeeze. My head snaps up without my permission, looking at the boy. He flashes me a smile, and I return it, feeling a bit better. I'm not alone with this, I've got backup.

I raise my hands to my chest, forming the traditional gesture and bow my head. "I apologize for keeping everyone. I resolve to control my irrational nervousness."

"Please, no need for formalities," the woman cuts in. "Fancy words are for reports."

"I can't wait," the man sighs jokingly, causing some snickers. I don't join in, but the tension is instantly mellowed. What's the worst that could happen?

 _I could sneeze..._

I shove that thought to the back of my mind. I'm not gonna sneeze. I refuse to sneeze.

"So..." the man begins. "My name is Li, by the way." Always those Lis... "And this is Hina. We were told you kids are some of the children who have been disappearing around the Kagio Channel. Is that correct?"

He looks around, and I can't help doing the same. Everyone does it, with varying degrees of confusion written on their faces. I realize we didn't elect a speaker. In the end, it's Judai who takes the initiative, probably because he happens to be the one sitting closest to the guy.

"That's correct."

"Mostly," I feel the need to set the record straight. "I was traveling with some friends when I got caught up in this whole catastrophe. I'm from Cinder Island City."

"Cinder Island?" the Li guard repeats, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "That's a few days worth of travel."

What am I supposed to say about that? "It is. But it's fun to spend some time with friends."

"I'm sure it is," he smiles and I relax my shoulders. I didn't even notice them tensing. "Very well, kids. I need your names, ages, the names of your birthplaces and the places where you currently live. From left to right."

Hmm, I guess that makes me second place, after Judai. Guard Li whips out a quill and a scroll, then nods, signaling that we can start.

I look at my friend expectantly, who takes a deep breath. "My name is Judai, no surname. I'm fifteen years old and was born in Chimomi. I live in Kalai."

I guess that was it. Seems like it's my turn now. "My name is Kamina, no surname. I'm fourteen years old, born and residing in Cinder Island City."

"Kiran, no surname. I'm sixteen, and I live here in Rubona. I was born here, too."

There is a short pause while Maila and Li Yu, sitting behind Kiran on the sofa, figure out who goes first.

"Maila Komia, thirteen years old." Wait, she's got a surname? "I was born in Fire Fountain City, and I'm currently living in Iluro."

"Li Yu, no surname. I'm fourteen years old. I was born in Iluro and still live there."

Guard Li scribbles everything down, while Guard Hina sends Lori a glance. "What about you?"

"My name is Lori, but I don't have much to do with the case."

"She's my girlfriend," Kiran explains, pulling her closer. Guard Hina nods her understanding.

"Very well," she declares. "Do you have any knowledge of the whereabouts of the other missing children?"

"Not all of them, I'm afraid," Judai anwers, taking on his newly applied speaker role again. He squirms a bit in his seat, obviously ill at ease. Before I can change my mind, I reach out and place a hand on his arm, hoping to help him calm down. I think it's a good idea to get that part off him, so I turn to the guards and take it from there.

"We were captured by slave traders. I didn't spend much time in captivity, luckily, but as far as I know, children have been shipped to the Earth Kingdom, or..." I bite my tongue. The next words are difficult to bring out. "Or killed."

The two adults exchange afflicted glances, but they don't look surprised.

"We suspected something like this," Guard Li remarks. "There have been a couple arrests for human trafficking along the Kagio Channel, but there was no pinpointing a specific location."

"It's impossible to find if you don't know what to look for," Li Yu puts in. "There is a sort of irony to it, but it's a bunch of colonials we have to thank for our freedom."

"Colonials?" Guard Li frowns.

"We were held in a cave up in the mountains," Maila elaborates. "It was sealed, so it couldn't be distinguished from the outside. We wouldn't have been able to escape either, if it hadn't been for Kamina's earthbender friends. They got us all out."

Guard Li directs his interested gaze at me, and I feel my cheeks heat up. A part of me wants to be defiant and say 'Yeah, some of my friends are earthbenders. So what?'

But I can't do it. I just can't do it. "Long story," I tell him instead, avoiding the topic. "Anyway, back to the original question: There are forty, fifty other children waiting for help, back in the mountains, many of them too injured to walk. We need carts and ostrich horses or komodo rhinos, and shelter and food and... What are we gonna do?"

Now that I talked myself into a frenzy, I bury my face in my hands. Isn't this all a little too much?

"It's alright, Kamina," Guard Hina chips in. "That's nothing for you kids to worry about."

"That's right," Kiran agrees, and I lift my head to find him smile encouragingly. "You and your friends may have been the ones to break everyone out, but that doesn't mean you have to shoulder all the responsibility. Relax! The people of Rubona will handle the rest."

I guess that's true. I lean back and take a deep breath, releasing the tension that has been building up in me again. "Alright," I relent, and I feel a lot lighter afterwards.

This isn't my fight anymore. I don't need to act like it were.

* * *

 **Okay, I don't have much time, so I'll reply reviews and stuff another time. Sorry to keep you waiting, but I can't exactly help it.**

 **There isn't much else to say here, no hidden meanings in names this time. Well, apart from the surnames, that is. That's just some headcanon of mine that only higher classes have surnames. Like the Beifong family.  
So teachers are all high society or something... They can afford it, while the lower classes sooner work in menial jobs.  
That's why Kami is so surprised that Maila has a surname.**

 **I may or may not give some more backstory, depends on whether it fits the story or not. My plans habitually run away from me anyway, so I can't tell from here.**

 **Zentauria over and out~**


	23. Puma Goats

**I have a life! And access to the university Internet!**

* * *

The Q&A game continues a while longer. I learn that Maila and Li Yu were out camping when they were captured. Ambush in the night, Li Yu was asleep and never even had the chance to fully wake before he was trapped in a block of earth. Maila has been away following the call of the bushes, and when she returned, she fought with everything she got, earning her the scars on her cheeks.

Kiran's story mirrors mine, he was taking a walk when the mountain just swallowed him up. Turns out that, after he disappeared, people started avoiding the woods, and only one other child from Rubona is missing.

Judai has the most interesting tale to tell. He was running an errand for his grandmother (he lives with her, apparently, not his parents), tasked with buying some foodstuffs for the inn that they don't sell in Kalai. So he took an ostrich horse and was on his way to the nearest town. And then, during a rest, he too found himself encased in stone, and his ostrich horse run off.

The interesting part is that he managed to escape. He didn't get far, obviously, but he explains that he always carries a dagger for self-defense in a concealed back pouch, so the following night, he cut himself loose. He even avoided the sentry and probably would have made it if it hadn't been for the slavers' ostrich horses stirring up a ruckus. And because simply recapturing him couldn't possibly be enough, they used his own blade to cut his arms.

I kind of scoot over to him while he's narrating, take his hand into mine. I don't know why, but considering that we have known each other for about two hours tops, we've grown awfully close. I guess there is something about sharing a terrifying experience that makes you feel... connected in some way.

 _I'll miss him._

The realization strikes me hard. Agni, I'll miss him! I'll miss his laugh, his playfulness, the way he seems to find delight in practically everything. Just like I can find a downside in practically everything. We're complementing each other beautifully, aren't we? (Mark the sarcasm. Agni, I barely know him! _Two hours_ at max, and a good chunk of that time was spent passionately shutting our respective pair of ears to the other. And yet... Misery loves company?)

I'll miss Maila and Li Yu, too. And maybe even Kiran, a little tiny bit.

I guess it's a bit petty, but I'll miss the admiration as well. I don't like to admit it, but the more I come to terms with the idea that yes indeed, I did well, I'm stronger than I ever thought possible and maybe, maybe, _maybe_ being an airbender is not the kind of trait you need to be ashamed of... The more I feel that I don't have to hate myself quite as much as the history books claim, the less conflicted I feel about the praise. And who doesn't enjoy some well-deserved ego-stroking?

I have no illusions about staying for too long, though. The longer we stick around, the greater the likelihood of some sort of mishap. Someone slipping up with the cover names, me hurling myself across the room, stuff like that. Stuff I'd rather not have.

Urgh, my brain is going off on tangents again... Pull yourself together, Kami! Where have we been? Right, I suppose Judai needs a new dagger. And once that issue is clarified, the question I've been dreading this whole time is asked.

"How did you escape?"

I tighten my grip on Judai's hand. I don't want to hurt him, but I need to answer that myself.

"It's like Li Yu said: I was captured, and my friends came looking for me. They freed us. They're really strong and had surprise on their side. I don't think the slavers expected opposition from other earthbenders."

Quick and easy. No suspiciously inexplicable awesomeness on my part. Kiran raises a brow, Maila and Li Yu share a look, and Judai forgets to retaliate. But they seem to respect my unspoken wish and remain quiet while Guard Li jots down my words.

"Thank you, kids," he concludes the interview. "Usually, this would be the point where we ask if you would mind to be contacted in case of further queries," he adds jovially, "but I'm afraid we don't have enough messenger hawks to send them all over the Kagio Channel."

"Well, I'm not going anywhere in the near future," Kiran notes. "Besides, Yulika is up there as well. I think we can make all the statements you need."

Yulika? The firebender girl I more or less carried to the mountain stream before diving in myself? So she's from Rubona? Good to know.

"Thank you, Kiran," Guard Hina finds her way back into the conversation. "That will be very helpful."

"Anything to get those bas- Ow!" Kiran glares at Lori, who took advantage of their close proximity to shove her shoulder into his. "Come on, they deserve it!"

"There are soldiers in this room," she points out, causing her boyfriend to tense up and turn back to the guards.

"I'm sorry," he states with a bow. "I didn't mean any disrespect."

"Apology accepted," Guard Li responds with a grin which unambiguously says, _Really, we talk like that, too. But I can't say it out loud because then I'd fail as a role model._ "Anyway, we've been wasting enough time on bureaucracy," (I can almost hear Judai groan on the inside.) "so we should gather some komodo rhinos and puma goats to get the children."

"Puma goats?" I repeat absentmindedly. I'm pretty sure I heard that before, but I have absolutely no inkling what kind of animal it is. Some sort of mount, apparently.

"Why, look at this, everybody! Our all-knowing city girl doesn't know everything after all!" Judai teases. Grinning, he slips his hand out of my grasp and proceeds to poke me in the ribs. I recoil at the sudden invasion of personal space, without really meaning to.

Okay, that does it! Challenge accepted!

"Hey!" I protest, laughing, squealing, whatever you may call it. And then I poke him back. He lets out a noise somewhere between a kicked hare dog puppy and a choke, and I have no idea how to interpret it. It's not like it should have come entirely unexpected, right?

Anyway, the sound is _priceless_. I giggle, while Judai pinches the bridge of his nose, grumbling in exasperation. Which I suspect to be fake and meant to cover up embarrassment. Seriously, I'm not the only one to snicker at the... achem, _extraordinary_ expressiveness. Even the guards sport amused grins.

"That... never happened," Judai states flatly, daring everyone present to say otherwise.

Maila cheerfully jumps at the challenge. "You think?" she chortles. "You just made our comprehensive days!"

"Right, and you can thank me by keeping your mouth shut."

Maila smirks meaningfully.

"You would have been better off not saying anything," Li Yu remarks, trying to sound apologetic. With emphasis on _trying_.

"I can see that," my neighbor drawls, before sweeping at the table and expertly picking up his tea cup to finish it (or hide behind). I stifle a laugh, now I definitely believe that he works in an inn. Inns double as the local tavern more often than not, and I can totally imagine him cleaning tables or taking orders. He has the wits to deal with self-important patrons. On a less pleasant note, however, I guess that also justifies carrying a concealed dagger. And being handy with it, too. I can do very well in my life without getting between two drunk firebenders riling each other up... or... worse...

Well, anyway, I decide to follow Judai's example and finish my tea. Tea is always good!

* * *

It takes about half an hour to assemble a rescue party. Or more like a transport party, seeing how the rescuing part has been taken care of long ago.

I kinda glue myself to Judai, even when the rendezvous area – a field lying fallow at the outskirts of the village – gets crowded with potential new acquaintances. Or more like for precisely that reason. Strangers! Terrible!

He doesn't seem to mind, though. It's not like I insist on pressuring him. In fact, I reduce my presence to a minimum – follow his lead, don't speak unless asked, avoid physical contact.

That is, until I see the puma goats. They're muscly, white-furred creatures, with small heads which are adorned with cat ears and long horns contrasted by _huuuuge_ shoulders, and then the relatively small rear end again. (Frankly, they look like you'd slide backwards if you try to ride them.) And yet, in spite of their bulk, they're stunningly light-pawed.

Once I see one of those magnificent beasts, I have an aha experience. I knew I've heard about them!

I smack the side of my fist into the palm of the other hand, delighted. "Ha! Now I remember!"

"What?" Judai inquires without actually paying attention, but I'm too excited to mind.

"The puma goats! I've seen a picture of one in my... history textbook? I'm not sure, but anyway... They were used for dragon hunting, right?"

"Possible," comes the offhand answer, and I curl my lips into a pout. He doesn't even look at me, instead, he stares at a farmer and his son(?) hitching a komodo rhino to a carriage, arms crossed behind his head. After another second or two, he perks up and lightly slaps me on the back, shoving without really shoving. "Come on, let's make ourselves useful."

Er... okay? I guess that's what you call 'pragmatic'.

Judai's already taken a couple of steps before I shake off the daze and give chase. Make myself useful, ha! Easier said than done, I'm totally out of my depths with all this hitching and saddling. Honestly, the place where I'm the most useful is off to the side, where I don't stand in anyone's way!

But I can't stop him on time. He makes his way to the two males and speaks up, "Excuse me?"

Both of them halt in their work. The older man, I estimate him to be in his late forties, scowls at the interruption, while the younger one whom I assume to be his son (mid-twenties, I guess) raises a brow.

"What is it, kid? Need help with something?"

"That's what I was going to ask. Is there anything we can do?"

"Nah, we're fine. Good old Kara is a bit moody. Right girl?" He barks a short laugh and hits the komodo rhino across the shoulder. The gray pachyderm fails to react in the slightest.

"Looks placid to me," Judai remarks skeptically. I wish he'd just shut up and leave it. Really, I don't like the look of the beast's sharp, pointy, unforgiving horns!

"Take one step closer and see how placid she is," the son challenges, but clearly all in good fun. It still causes me to tense up, ready to spring into action the very moment my friend _dares_ to lift his foot.

He doesn't.

"Stop fooling around, Rinzo!" the father cuts in, scowl unwavering. He glowers at his son first, then turns at us. "And you kids run along! This is no place for children!"

Judai throws up his hands in what I'd title _surrender_ if it weren't for the quiet, but definitely exasperated huff. "Fine!" he announces with thinly veiled bitterness before spinning around and briskly stalking off.

I dash after him, unsure what to make of the whole situation. However, when I catch Judai muttering "Cranky-pants!" under his breath, I raise an inquisitive brow, feeling maybe a teeny tiny bit smug.

"And that comes as a surprise, because...?"

"Because I was offering to help, not making selfish demands," he grouches, and I have to admit that he's got a point. It doesn't mean that I can't understand the reaction, though.

"I think they just felt that you're meddling in things which are not your business. Besides, you don't look like the trustworthy type right now." I tug at a loose thread of his robe for emphasis. It comes off easily. "More like a random street rat, really."

Judai concedes the point with a low grumbling noise, while I puzzle over the thread in my hand. What am I supposed to do with it? Leave it to the wind? Give it back? There is no trashcan far and wide. Guess I'll just keep it for a while... But I left the pouch with the grocery money back with Appa and I didn't bother with another bag. (Which is probably just as well, the slavers would have taken it away.)

I end up looping the thread around my pinkie for the time being. It's only afterwards that it occurs to me... I chuckle and raise my hand, finger outstretched to show off the fine line of color.

"Look, it's a red string!"

We stop in our tracks and Judai sends a wary glance my way. I blame it on his bad mood. "So?"

"Don't you know the legend?" I ask, lifting my other hand in preparation for gesturing. "It says that two people who are destined for each other are connected by an invisible red string wrapped around their pinkie fingers. Isn't it sweet?"

One corner of Judai's mouth lifts into a half-smile. "What, the string? Seems rather uncertain to me, if it can't even decide whether it wants to be red or invisible."

I click my tongue and groan in fake annoyance, then proceed to nudge his ribs with my elbow. "Aw, come on! You're taking all the fun out of it with your constant letter-happiness!" I complain, but I suppose it would have worked better if I had felt any need to contain the laughter bubbling in my throat. Or used a different word than 'happiness'.

The irony is not lost on Judai. "Could have fooled me," he smirks, and I flash him a toothy grin in response. Glad he's feeling better.

"Sooo..." Judai continues after a while, crossing his arms behind his head. Realizing that we're not going to take another step in the near future, I spin around so I don't have to turn my head anymore in order to face him.

Judai shifts his stance as well, but he doesn't look at me directly. I can still see his curled lips, he seems unsure about something.

"What?" I prompt, worry starting to gnaw at me. "Something wrong?"

He tilts his head, eyeing me up and down. I grit my teeth, giving it three seconds. If nothing happens until then, I'm going to explode!

Two seconds. Then Judai bursts into laughter and relaxes his arms. "No way!"

What. The. _Flubbering_. TURTLEDUCK?!

* * *

 **Tadaa!**

 **One of the things I love about fanfiction is the communication with the readers. This chapter would have looked plenty different if it hadn't been for the guest reviewer who pointed out that ostrich horses have bird feet. Which in and of itself is not a new discovery, but I never thought too much about it. 80% of ostrich horse screentime is in mountain terrain, the only problem: It's in the Earth Kingdom. Where earthbenders are perfectly capable of creating ostrich horse-friendly paths.**

 **That was when I remembered the puma goats from the comic "Dragon Days". And it all came together beautifully, because I wanted to turn tables anyway and write something what Judai knows better than Kami. School is not everything, after all. You gotta go out and _do_ stuff, experience it. Knowledge is not limited to books.**

 **So, many thanks to the guest, the inspiration for this chapter came from you!**

 **Alright, that's all. For now. Maybe I remember something later, as traditional, but then you'll find out in the next chapter. Peace out!**


	24. At The End Of The Day

I never get to find out _what in the world_ has been going through Judai's head.

"Come on, I want to laugh, too!" I keep trying anyway and puff up my cheeks, a hand on the hip.

But Judai only waves me off. "Believe me, it's not funny if I say it out loud."

Silence. Maybe that helps.

"Forget it. You're not gonna change my mind."

I sigh and let my shoulders drop. "Fine, I give up." Asking nicely didn't work, asking less nicely didn't work either, puppy eyes, pouting, the silent treatment... Judai is unmovable, and I'm all out of options. "So, now that we're done bantering... Any suggestions what to do next?"

"Get a lift. I'm sure we'll find someone."

I give a noncommittal hum and shrug. I don't feel any need to repeat the experience from a few minutes ago. Actually, I'd even prefer _walking_ back over asking for a ride. But I guess it's okay if Judai asks. As long as it's not me...

Surprisingly enough, the next carriage owners Judai approaches, a middle-aged couple, agree right away to take us with them. They also let him help with fixing everything up. I just stand around, probably looking as lost as I'm feeling. All those belts and buckles running criss-cross over the komodo rhino look absolutely jumbled to me, and I'm nothing short of _mystified_ by the skill the couple and Judai display.

Before long, the male side of the couple is checking the straps for... I don't know, loose parts maybe.

"Thank you, young man," he says afterwards. "Good job."

"My pleasure," my friend replies with a respectful bow. "The name's Judai, by the way."

"Fao Ji," the man introduces himself, smiling warmly, then gestures at the woman. "And that beauty over there is my wife Mayu."

Mayu comes from the other side of the rhino, while Judai grins at me, silently beckoning. I feel a bit uncomfortable, but I force myself to step up and bow a greeting.

"I'm Kamina. Nice to meet you."

"Same here," I can hear Mayu's friendly voice. I chance a look, she has a welcoming smile on her lips, warm brown eyes and pale freckles on her light brown face. Apparently, tanned skin is rather common in this region. Aang and me wouldn't attract any attention with our skin color out here...

Come to think about it, Hide is actually pretty dark, too. Almost as dark as Sokka and Katara. I wonder... _No._ There is no way in the world Hide would be of Water Tribe descent. It's more probable that his family originates from a sunnier region of the Fire Nation.

"Well then," Fao Ji's voice penetrates my thoughts. "Hop in, kids! We'll be starting anytime now."

"Thank you," I state, bowing once again before climbing into the cart with Judai. It seems to be a simple hay cart, a wooden platform with a one and a half foot rim. The plank at the back flaps down on hinges, allowing for easier access, but there are no special features like benches or something. Well, I guess I can't expect it, so I just stretch out my legs and lean back on my hands. Judai kneels at the side with his arms placed on the rim, gaze traveling over the bustling field.

I leave him alone and recline on the wood, closing my eyes against the dazzling sunlight. Which I planned on doing anyway, the strain of the last hours is catching up, now that I have a chance to truly rest for a moment. I'm tired, and I cross my arms behind my head as a pillow. I have to shift a bit to relieve the pressure on the sword cut, but it's comfortable enough.

A "Hang on, children!" warns me of the following jerk forward, then we're moving smoothly and before I know it, I'm dozing off in the afternoon heat.

That is, until the going stops being smooth. I hiss in pain when a jolt causes my wrist to bump against my injured arm and I shoot up.

"Are you okay back there?" Mayu throws over her shoulder from her seat next to her driving husband.

"I'm fine," I squeeze through gritted teeth, thankful the gash hasn't started to bleed again. The pain is already abating, but I decide it's safer to refrain from lying back down.

"You sure?" Judai asks and I look to the side, catching his worried, maybe even fearful gaze. I smile reassuringly.

"I'm sure. It doesn't even hurt anymore." I get why he's concerned, though. The angry red lines on his arms offer all the explanation needed.

Before my eyes get fixed to them again, I tear my gaze away and take in the procession of rhinos and carts. Puma goats are nowhere to be found, I suppose they took the direct way, up the steep paths which the carts cannot pass through. The trees cast long shadows, and in a moment of shock, I realize that the sun is beginning to set. How is it sundown already?!

"It's getting late," Judai remarks, as if reading my mind. "I hope we get everyone down before nightfall."

"Don't worry, young man," Fao Ji pipes up. "It's not our first rescue job. By the time the moon is out, you'll have a roof over your head and a warm meal in your stomach, trust me."

"Thank you so much," Judai replies earnestly, bowing his head even though the couple can't see it. Oh, the force of habit...

"No probl..." The rest of the answer gets swallowed by another bump in the road, and I almost get knocked over again. Okay, that does it! This is not how I imagined the trip back!

I crawl over to Judai and grab onto the rim of the cart myself, grumbling, "I should have walked!"

"So tough, city girl?"

He can't help it, can he?

I huff and poke my tongue out at him. "I'll show you tough!"

"I'm looking forward to it!" Judai teases. Then he sobers, setting alarm bells ringing in my head. "You shouldn't stick your tongue out, though. If we hit another bump, you might accidentally bite it off."

I grimace uncomfortably, that sounds painful. "I'll keep it in mind."

We keep silent for a while, just sitting next to each other, treegazing. Then, completely out of the blue, Judai speaks up, "Can I ask you something?"

I spin around at the anxiety in his voice. Again? It's painful to listen to... But at least he's not shaking or anything, just staring straight ahead, with eyes narrowed in what I hope to be concentration. "Uh... Sure, ask away."

"What's the date?"

"The date? Er..." I rack my brain, calculating. If I'm not mistaken, it's... "The fifth day of Seventhmonth."

"The fifth..." he repeats huskily, collapsing like a house of cards. His eyes glaze over, and I grit my teeth in discomfort when I'm confronted with the distraught boy I met back in the cage. Before I can decide otherwise, I pull him into a hug. I'm not entirely sure what his problem is, but I have my suspicions.

"You've been stuck in there for a while, haven't you," I whisper, acutely aware of the poking ribs, the matted hair, the slight tension in his muscles, ready to take flight... or maybe a hit.

"Four weeks," Judai mumbles, and he sounds thoroughly beaten. I can't think of anything to say, so I just hug him tighter, resolving to stay with him until he pushes me away.

Or the next bump, at least. Where we somehow manage to knock our heads together and, reacting accordingly, break apart with cries of pain. Someone's got a hard skull...

"Are you alright, kids?" Mayu asks once again, twisting in her seat to look at us.

"Yeah, we'll be fine," I grumble, rubbing my throbbing temple. "But I hate those bumps more and more."

"I'm afraid we can't do anything about them," she states with an apologetic undertone, and I wave it off.

"I know that. Sorry for taking my bad mood out on you."

She smiles friendly. "It's okay. I'm glad it's nothing more serious."

I bite down on my lip. Nothing more serious, huh? I don't know about that. I wait until Mayu has turned forward again, then glance at Judai, who didn't respond at all. His back is turned at the two drivers, but I can see the tears threatening to roll down his face. And I can also marvel at how masterfully he's holding them in. Probably even better than me...

* * *

The rest of the trip passes by uneventfully. There is no more talking, no more comforting. It tears me up on the inside, but I don't know what to do. And so I don't do anything at all.

I'm glad when we rumble to a halt near the pool. I don't even wait for the hatch to be opened, I jump over the rim of the cart and quite literally run away from the suffocating atmosphere, weaving through the trees until I reach the clearing. I can see Guard Li talk to Sokka and Toph, while Guard Hina and Katara roam the place, checking that everything goes off without a hitch. A couple puma goats and komodo rhinos are already laden with new riders. A cart is parked nearby, occupying the only spot which is spacious enough for such a big vehicle, and I catch sight of Aang helping to ease a badly injured boy onto the platform. Which, as opposed to the one I just hopped off of, is covered in... straw mats, I assume. And blankets.

"Kamina!" I hear someone call out for me, and I recognize Katara's voice. She waves me over, and I happily obey.

"Hey!" I greet her. "How's it going?"

"Everything is going smoothly," Katara reports, smiling. "I'm sure..."

She's interrupted by a cheerful "Kaaamiii!" and I find Mari speeding toward me. I'm already preparing for impact when she stops just short of my toes. A knot forms in my stomach ( _I have to deal with a child again!_ ), but I suppress the uneasiness and force myself to grin.

"Hey Mari, good to see you! You're still looking out for everyone?"

She nods enthusiastically. "Of course!"

"That's great!" I praise her and give her a pat on the head. "Then tell them that the carts have arrived. They'll take you somewhere safe so your parents can come."

For a moment, Mari looks shocked, then a beaming smile spreads on her face. "Yes!" she cheers and runs off again. Relief washes over me, and I turn back to Hina and Katara with a small smile.

"Is there something I can help with?"

"You could..." Katara starts, only to get cut off again by a "Hina!" and three heads spin around. It's Guard Li with Toph and Sokka.

"Oh, hey guys!" I wave.

"Hey Kamina," Sokka replies distractedly, a serious expression on his face. Toph goes about it a lot more jovially, grinning and... punching my arm?!

"Ow!"

"Welcome back, Fireflake!" she ignores my cry. I glare at her and shake the offended limb to get rid of the pain, huffing.

Guard Li speaks up, "The children are taken care of. I think it's time to apprehend the slave traders," causing Guard Hina to nod, her gaze hardening.

"Good idea. Let's go."

A word and a blow. Sokka and Toph accompany the two guards as backup, and I follow them out of curiosity. We walk to the cave, and are greeted by an interesting sight. Registry-guy and swordwoman are stuck in earth blocks, and it looks like Toph has bent the metal of the cuffs with which Judai and the other teens have been restrained to immobilize earthbender guy and the doctor. Which probably means she's an earthbender as well, the two are even blindfolded. I don't know how much sense it makes, Toph is blind and can still see just fine. Then again, Toph is special. I guess I really lucked out on getting the two most dangerous slavers with my sneeze attack...

"Who's there?" earthbender guy hollers, snapping me out of my musings. I assume it's supposed to be intimidating. Well, it's not.

"Gee, who do you think it is?" swordwoman replies sarcastically. "It's the little fire brat and her treacherous friends."

Toph's reaction to the accusation is rather appropriate: She stomps her foot, shaking up the stone casing which holds swordwoman.

"Watch your mouth!"

On the other side, earthbender guy wails, "Stop it, Zahmi! You can't mess with the spirits."

"What is he talking about?" Sokka asks, appearing thoroughly weirded out.

I shrug. He doesn't see it, but I don't care. "Me, of course."

Another fearful whimper. "It's her... It's the spirit!" Yeah, that guy is truly superstitious. I mean, I know spirits exist, but I doubt they look like Fire and Air Nation bastards.

It's kind of an opening, but this time, I don't feel the need to exploit it. It's just pathetic. Wordlessly, I watch Guard Li and Guard Hina leading the slavers away, with Toph's help. Sokka and me traipse after them with some distance, and when we reach the mountain stream, I see some of the remaining children flinch back. Some others stiffen, but no one shouts or screams. It has something of a funeral.

I spot Judai in the crowd, hanging around Aang, and I notice only then that I've been unconsciously searching for him. I catch his solemn gaze, and I know he's been looking for me, too. I'm not sure how I know, I just... do. I feel it.

I wonder if I should walk over to him, but I don't think he wants me around right now. I did kind of run away after all. Besides, I can't let myself become dependent on him. We'll be leaving, and I probably won't see him again. Well, maybe in some distant future... That would be nice.

But for now, I just stick with Sokka. Ironically, it doesn't really help, because the gang ends up gathering around anyway. Katara springs up from somewhere, then Aang, trailed by Judai, then Toph comes back with Guard Hina and Guard Li.

"Thank you, kids," the latter begins. "You've done the people of the Fire Nation a great service."

I shift uncomfortably, eyes glued to my toes. If only they knew...

"I'm glad we could help," Aang's voice rises, honestly, confidently. I look up to find him straighten after a bow. And yet... I can't really tell, because I'm standing behind him, but Aang seems distressed when he flashes a glance at the cart rumbling off with the slavers. "What's going to happen to them?"

"They'll be send off to prison," Guard Hina replies, voice harsh with suppressed anger, but Aang relaxes visibly. "They won't be tearing any more families apart."

Next to me, I sense Sokka tensing up and catch him sharing a look with his sister. That's... hmm... I guess that's nothing I want to think about too much.

"So..." Guard Li drawls, ready to navigate the conversation into a less emotionally charged direction. "I'm sure you kids would like to sleep in an actual bed after this episode. The inn has a six-bed room, you can stay for free."

"Six?" Aang repeats skeptically, speaking out my own thoughts. "But we're..."

"Well, we do kind of have an extra," Toph comments, effectively cutting Aang off and steering the general sight line at Judai. "Don't you have someone else to cling to, Mayor Mango?"

Uh oh... I stare ultra-hard and slightly panicky at my friend, giving it my all to communicate a telepathic _Don'tsnapshe'sjustteasingpleasepleasefortheloveofAgnidon'tsnap!_

An eyebrow twitches dangerously, but I notice with relief that the words end up sounding calm and controlled: "I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't call me that. And, for the record, making friends isn't exactly top priority when you're locked up and starving. So no, I don't have anyone else _to cling to!_ "

Okay, scratch the 'controlled'. _Tranquil fury_ probably fits the cynic tone better.

"Guys..." Aang steps in, carefully. "I know we're all upset and tired, but we're all on the same side with this. So let's avoid fighting, okay? Toki didn't mean it."

I release a breath I didn't realize I've been holding when Toph doesn't declare otherwise, just crosses her arms. Judai sighs.

"Anyhow, I don't think it's a good idea for me for to stay in the same room as you guys." There is that unsettling gesture again... Judai hugging himself as if he were cold. I want him to quit it. What is he talking about, anyway?

Nightmares of course, stupid Kami. Wake up crying, or even screaming. I can understand that he wants to be alone.

I take his hand and give it a gentle squeeze. "You probably have to stay with someone else, anyway. Might as well be with us."

"Can we think about that later?" Sokka chips in. "We need to get back to camp first, there are things to take care of."

An image of Appa flashes through my mind. Sokka's right, I suppose, and it would be good to get away from everyone. There are a couple things to discuss, stuff which would strike people as odd.

We should be splitting up, I know that. But I'm not ready to leave, and I can't help but wonder if, once we're gone, Sokka would let me go back...

* * *

 **Lately, it's becoming something of a compulsion to post A/Ns at the head of the chapter, so this one comes without top A/N to prove to myself I'm not gonna die from omitting it.**

 **So, about the ostrich horses: The Fire Nation has them alright. I checked even before I posted the 22nd chapter. Granted, they only appear in the post-war comics, so they might as well be imported from the Earth Kingdom, but I kinda doubt the Royal Guard would ride an animal they're not familiar with while protecting the Firelord and his newfound family. It's all up in the air of interpretation and headcanon, I guess. The Avatar Wiki isn't too specific about it, either.  
**

 **I checked the date for the Day of Black Sun in the Library episode, it's the first day of the eighth month, so I gave the Gaang about three weeks to get to the Black Cliffs. I hope that's not gonna come back to bite me in the blubber. ^^"  
(Yeah, Japanese skills are helpful with reading Chinese. The inscription on the gate to the Serpent's Pass reads 'despair', but as far as my limited Chinese skills go, that might actually amount to the same as 'abandon hope'. I don't really know.)  
**

 **Okay, I think that's enough fun facts for now. Zentauria over and out!**


	25. Shatter and Reassemble

At first, I'm a bit worried about how we'd ditch Judai. As far as I can tell, he seems to be the type of person who tries to help wherever he can, and has a hard time taking no for an answer. But by the time everyone is safely in the carts, bandaged up if necessary and wrapped in the occasional blanket, he looks just about ready to crash. Or maybe fall asleep standing upright, who knows?

Fact is, I'm not the only one for whom this whole misadventure was a bit too much. Adrenaline can only take you so far, and there is only token resistance when Sokka sends Judai back to Rubona with the others.

I wonder what to say. Is there any possibility to convince the others to stay? I bet there is some lost time to make up for, and reason enough to get out of here. People know us now, it's only a matter of time...

"Kamina!"

It's Katara's call which rips me out of my thoughts, and I blink the momentary disorientation away. The Water Tribe girl is standing near the pool, waving me over. Hmm... water... waterbender?

I feel some of the old wariness stealing its way into my mind. I talked to the guards without them, what if they think I... No, that's ridiculous! Katara would never hurt me... right?

I shake off the paranoia. If they wanted to attack me, they would have done so already.

Before I can change my mind again, I stride over to Katara. "What is it?"

"Would you show me your arm, please?"

My... Oh! Of course! She's going to heal the sword cut! I feel a smile breaking out on my face when even the last remnants of the caution fade. I'm with friends here. I don't have to be afraid.

I lift my arm to give Katara easier access, while the girl herself bends a bubble of water from the mountain stream, covering her hands in it. The water starts emitting a calming blue glow, and I can literally watch the lips of the wound close when she places her hand on my arm to spread the water over the cut. I can only stare in fascination, it's the first time I actually see her work up close.

"Katara, did I mention you're amazing?"

"Only a couple of times today," she jokes, a pleased grin on her face. Then her expression changes back to concentration and after another few seconds, she removes her hand. The gash, formerly five inches long and crusted with blood, has turned into a fine red line, still visible, but far from alarming. I kinda expected it to disappear completely, but it would be ungrateful to say it out loud.

"Thank you."

She accepts the words with a smile. I'm surprised to detect a tinge of wistfulness in it. "I wish I could have done more."

"Why?" I ask incredulously, waving my freshly healed arm around. I didn't even realize how much the wound had been restricting my movements. "Katara, this is awesome!"

"Thank you."

With my focus on Katara's indecipherable expression, I notice Aang only once the waterbender turns to him.

"Katara, you did everything you could," the little Avatar insists in all sincerity, a hand on her shoulder. "It's not your fault those kids have been hurt so badly. You saved so many lives today, you can be proud of yourself." He retracts his hand and a huge, encouraging smile spreads on his lips. "I sure am."

And there goes the next "Thank you." Wow, that's a lot of thank-yous for a minute... Wait, what's going on? Katara leans down to plant a light kiss on Aang's cheek, causing a pink color to rise to his face, the dark gray eyes betraying utter bliss.

I smirk. Looks like someone's in love. I wonder if it's mutual? I mean, _Katara_ kissed _Aang_ , not the other way round, but it may as well be purely friendly.

Hmm, no point in risking a headache over it. I'll probably find out sooner or later.

A throat is cleared somewhere to the left and I direct my attention at Sokka. "We should get moving, I'm not exactly keen on wandering around these mountains in the dark."

I'm about to point out that we have Toph to guide us if push comes to shove, but since I don't like the idea either, I just nod. The rest is quick to agree as well and before long, we're navigating the narrow paths back to the campsite.

After a few minutes of concentrated hiking without stumbling, the ground levels out a bit and I use the chance to peer at the sun, shading my eyes with a hand. "I wonder how much time we still have until it's pitch black up here."

"About half an hour, I'd say," Sokka's voice answers from behind and I flash him a questioning glance, only to get reprimanded with an "Eyes to the front, Fireflake!"

Startled, I whip around, barely registering the rock in front of my toes before I already leapt over it. "Huh, that was close," I mumble to myself, then raise my voice for a "Thanks, Toph!"

She scoffs. "Just get your head out of the clouds."

"Toph, you can't tell airbenders to get their heads out of the clouds," Sokka notes in a jesting-lecturing tone. "It's their natural habitat."

"We're right here," Aang reminds the Water Tribe teen testily. He's very busy jumping down an outcrop.

"Feels good to say, doesn't it, Twinkletoes?"

Aang freezes for a moment, then proceeds to whip around, looking first at Toph, then at me. His eyes are so full of sadness, and yet so full of _warmth_.

I don't know how to return the gaze. I realized already what Toph has been saying: Referring to airbenders as 'we'... that's special. To him even more than me.

"Yes," he breathes, then a smile spreads on his lips, blowing the sadness away. Katara, who's been hanging around him for most of the way, places a hand on his, and he turns the smile at her, while my attention gets forcefully redirected – a fist against my arm makes me turn around to face Toph. I don't even bother with complaining this time, but I _do_ wonder how it's possible for such a tiny girl to pack such a punch.

 _Tsk, earthbenders._

"What about you, Fireflake? You're not even giving a peep."

"What are you expecting me to say?" I retort, a bit cross because of all the unnecessary punching. "That I'm happy that I tripped over the Avatar and tear myself up over conflicting loyalties ever since?"

Toph's eyebrows furrow and I immediately regret my words.

"Sorry," I apologize, dropping my gaze to the ground. "That was unfair."

"No, it wasn't," Aang chips in, drawing four pairs of eyes to himself. He looks just as sincere as he sounds. "You have every right to feel that way. I know how highly Fire Nation people value loyalty, and judging from the way you and Judai stick so close together, I think it reinforced your attachment."

I frown. I never really thought about that. Up to now, it was just the general idea of the Fire Nation, the _Firelord_ , I refuse to betray. It's my home after all. And it's true... I don't want to betray Judai. I don't want to betray Mimi, my parents. But... how much do I care about the Firelord?

I've grown up being taught about his greatness. How the Fire Nation grows and thrives under his care, and how selflessly he shares the wealth with the world. Under his rule, we're safe.

Share our wealth... by wiping out people like Aang?

Safe... by sending our family and friends to a battlefield?

Grow and thrive... on Earth Kingdom blood and sweat?

I squeeze my eyes shut and press my hands onto my temples. My head hurts. Why? Why _me?_

"Now I know why they say 'ignorance is bliss'..." I mumble, prompting Aang to ask for a repetition I'm not willing to give. Toph is so kind to fill in for me. I have no idea how they react. I don't care.

I wish Judai were here. Or my mum. By all the tea leaves of the dragon bush, I'd even go for On Ji. Anyone familiar. Anyone _Fire Nation_.

Honestly, I'm not sure where the sentiment stems from. There is no desperation, nor is there any sadness or anger. It's something beyond that. I feel _empty_. Empty and drained.

Two hands come to lie on my shoulders. "Kami, look at me," Aang pleads. I don't see any reason to do so.

But neither do I see a reason not to. I take the tension out of my arms, let them fall limply to my sides. Open my eyes. Aang looks so serious all of a sudden.

"No, don't look away!" he cries, before I even register that I did it again. I flinch at the urgency in his tone, unintentionally sending him into a panic. "Uh, I didn't...! I mean...!"

"It's okay, Aang!" I cut into his babbling, maybe a bit too forcefully. "It's not your fault I'm such a weakling!"

We both take a moment to calm down, then the little Avatar continues, "Don't put yourself down like that."

I wave it off, resigned. "Believe it or not, self-loathing is hard to unlearn. So, there is something you want to tell me?"

Aang sighs. "Yeah... I'm not sure it helps, but..." He pushes up his headband, uncovering the blue arrow on his forehead. Then he puts his hands together and bows. "I promise to you, here and now, that when I defeat the Firelord, I'll personally see to it that the people of the Fire Nation will not suffer for it. At the hands of the Earth Kingdom or otherwise. It's not right to punish the innocent, and..."

He doesn't get any further – I overcome the astonishment-induced daze and tackle him into a hug, relieved, grateful, _completely overwhelmed_.

It sounds so perfect. Like this, I can help Aang without worrying about turning my back on my people. It's like a ton of weight has been lifted off my shoulders; I feel so light, I just might take off and fly.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," I whisper, and I can feel Aang's arms wrap around me to return the hug.

"You know, I'm the Fire Nation's Avatar, too. As weird as it sounds."

"That does sound weird," Sokka's voice comments in the background.

"Shush up!" comes a hiss from Katara, accompanied by a smacking sound. I bet she hit him. Question is whether that hurt as much as his words did.

"Hey, I just said it sounds weird, not that it's untrue!" Sokka defends himself. I'm not sure if _that_ makes it better...

I blink back the tears pricking at the corners of my eyes, then I feel ready to let go of Aang and face the world again. "Thank you," I repeat, a bit more subdued now. The euphoria has faded, the doubts are returning.

Do I really want this?

No. Not even remotely. Firelord Ozai... He is the rightful sovereign. He's Agni's chosen, his rule is absolute and divinely supported. Who am I to say that what he's doing is wrong? City girl or not, I'm just a lowly peasant who hasn't even received Agni's blessing. How can I turn full-blown traitor, just like that? How can I agree with removing him from the throne?

I need time to sort this out. And I need to do it without the influence of the Avatar and his friends, their presence alone makes me feel I'm pressured into something. In fact, I need to talk about this with someone from the Fire Nation. There is the matter of phrasing it when I do, but I can figure it out. I really need to get this off my chest. I need _Judai_.

I take a step back, so I can get a good look at everyone. Aang smiles encouragingly. Katara glares daggers at Sokka, who stares back, eyes wide and hands raised defensively. Toph blows at a strand hanging into her face, feigning disinterest.

"Would you..." I begin, adding the attention of the Water Tribe siblings to Aang's. My throat goes dry. I swallow hard, hoping to get some moisture down there. "Would you mind if I head back to Rubona for the night?"

"Why?" Sokka asks, arms crossed. I grit my teeth, why is it so difficult to have a decent conversation with him?

Funny thing is, he doesn't even sound suspicious. I'm not sure what he's aiming at, but I guess there is no harm in telling him.

"I need some away time."

Sokka raises a brow. "You just had... what, four hours?"

 _Four...?!_ I look up at the sky, the setting sun. It would fit. Better than two hours anyway. Did the whole slaver-ordeal warp my sense of time really _that_ badly?

Never mind.

"That doesn't count. It wasn't exactly a summer vacation." I sigh. "Besides, I haven't been this clear since I joined you guys. But, to be honest, you're making me nervous. It's nothing personal, I just..." I wave a hand in an uncertain gesture. I really don't know how to put this. "I can't be around you right now, and it sounds so wrong, but..."

"Stop apologizing for everything," Toph cuts in with a commanding voice. "If you need to go, then go! We'll catch you later."

"We will?" Aang blurts out.

"You will?" I follow up with a bit of a delay. Didn't see that coming.

"Well Twinkletoes, I'm not one to pass up on a free meal. Plus, no camp chores. Works for me!"

Sokka rubs his head exasperatedly. "Right. Then I'm sure you can explain to Kamina's new boyfriend why Aang won't undress for sleeping."

That pulls the blind girl up short. I guess she needs a reminder from time to time that Aang's tattoos are really posing a problem. It's not like it's such a striking detail to her.

Wait a minute... "He's not my..." I cut myself off and emit a huff instead. I'm not going to finish that hackneyed line. I refuse to behave like a stereotypical love-struck teenager in denial.

"Whatever," Sokka shrugs. "Fact is, we're not going."

"But..." I speak up again, thinking hard. I knew Sokka was going to react like this, but having Toph on my side jump-started me out of the I-don't-even-have-to-try zone. "If Judai is the only problem... He already said he'd rather sleep without us. I'm sure we can figure it out."

"Come on, Sokka!" Toph keeps prodding, and I find myself almost surprised that she used his actual name. "There'll be meat!"

I kinda doubt that Sokka would be swayed by that, so I'm not sure what to think when he puts a thump and index to his chin, apparently weighing his options.

"Alright, maybe we can give it a try." Before I can burst into cheers, he holds up a hand. "But only if Katara and Aang are in!"

I look expectantly at the both of them. True enough, they didn't participate in the prior debate, so we need to hear them out.

The little Avatar is the first to speak up. "I wouldn't mind a bed for a change, and..." He glances at me. "If you think it will help you find some peace, I'm all for it."

Last one is Katara, who nods. "I'd like to keep an eye on the children. As long as there is no risk of exposing Aang, we should be fine."

Yes! Yesyesyesyes!

I send my companions a beaming smile. "Thank you! You have no idea how much it means to me!"

I cash in a punch from Toph for it. "Then get on with it! Hook us a table while you're at it, I'm starving."

"Will do!" I laugh in response and give a mock salute, ignoring the pain in my arm. "I'll check on rooms, too. See you later!"

And with that, I turn around to skip down the mountain with newfound optimism. I finally feel that things are going to work out. One way or another.

* * *

 **And another important chapter done! Gotta love the character development. *dreamy sigh***

 **I always wondered why Toph of all people is the one reprimanding Aang about his arrow tattoos in The Beach, seeing how she's the one most likely to forget about them. And then I figured if she'd be reminded of them every now and again as a consequence of a mistake, if would be on the front of her mind for a while, because mistakes are less likely to be forgotten. So it could be a kind of we-had-that-problem-a-couple-days-ago remark.**

 **So much fridge logic.**

 **Oh, and the religion. Long Feng talks about how the Earth King is "a god to his people", Azula quotes "the divine right to rule"... LoK picks it up as well, with the Earth Queen. In combination with the Spirit World being an actual physical realm... it's funny. I like how the creators don't drop the hammer (no one is actively worshipping the rulers on-screen, if they're worshipped at all, unless you count Grandma Yin), but you can totally see it floating around. It's very accurate in an Asian-based show. Just beautiful!**

 **(I'm such a nerd.)**


	26. Nightfall

**BEFORE YOU READ THIS, please take note that there's been some kind of error with the last chapter. It's there, but it didn't cause alert mails to be send. I'm sure I'd have at least ONE hit if that were the case. The update date didn't... well, update either, so you could search for it a while with the default filter of "Latest Update". So yeah, if you're a follower directly jumped here, please go back one chapter and read it first, else there'll be a lot of confusion.**

* * *

By the time I'm back to Rubona, the sun is barely peeking over the mountaintops. The sky is streaked with pink, and it's cooling rapidly in the shadowy valley.

The village itself is surprisingly lifeless. A couple windows are illuminating the street, but else? Nothing. Not even a firebender lighting up the lanterns.

I weave between the houses, trying to reconstruct the way to the main street. I think we chased Kiran through here. Or there?

Maybe I should have stayed in the outskirts and walked along the village borders to find it... Well, too late now. I just keep one course, I'll arrive _somewhere_ sooner or later.

Before long, I start hearing voices, and _many_ of them. I follow the sound until I reach the village square, the goal of finding the main street forgotten.

The square is bursting with people, explaining the general emptiness of the rest of the place. I spot some familiar faces, most notably Guard Li and Hina. Apparently, someone put up a table for them, laden with paperwork. I push through the crowd to get a closer look, and it takes me a minute or two to figure out that they are sorting the children we freed with people who are willing to take them in. I wonder if I should draw attention to myself. They look very busy, and I don't want to disturb them, but I could use some help.

The problem solves itself when someone crashes into me from behind and I stumble, catching Guard Li's eye. He calls out for me and waves me over.

"You're back," he states the obvious. "Where are your friends?"

"Tidying up the campsite," I reply smoothly. I think that's what they do, apart from taking care of Appa and Momo, and while they're at it, they're probably also debating how to take down Firelord Ozai. It would make sense, seeing how I'm not around and there is no danger of anyone walking in on them. "They sent me ahead to check on things. We're taking your offer."

Guard Li smiles. "Thought so. You better hurry, your friend is waiting for you."

Waiting? I hope he doesn't mean what I think he means, but I think he does. I shake my head, Judai is too nice for his own good. "I bet he is. Which way do I go?"

Guard Li gives me a quick description and I run along, down the main street into an older part of the village, where the houses are randomly strewn out like mushrooms, rather than in a street-creating pattern. The inn isn't hard to find, it's the only two-story building around, complete with what appears to be a stable. Which makes sense, with an inn existing mostly for travelers who potentially come with mounts... I doubt Appa would fit in there, though. A sign reading _Inn_ is hanging next to the door, I figure it's the only one around and doesn't need a fancy name to be distinguishable.

The place looks clean and inviting, with white walls and a gabled red roof. It's not the kind of place which makes you want to run away real fast, and I have a good feeling when I push open the door.

I'm not disappointed. The room is brightly lit by lanterns, with a fireplace crackling on the left side. The counter is right across the room, with another door next to it which I assume to lead to the guest rooms, or maybe a bathroom. With yet another door on the right side, it's hard to tell.

A Fire Nation banner is hanging behind the counter, then there is a bulletin board with papers pinned to it which I can't read from here, a picture of Firelord Ozai occupying an extra shiny place on the wall... But the best feature is probably the scroll shelf. Pity I won't get a chance to read them.

Tables in various sizes are all over the room, most of them occupied by children no younger than ten. Which means no Mari, but I spot Judai and Nila at a round four-person table near the fireplace and make my way over to them. Nila is sipping tea from a cup, eyes red-rimmed and puffy, there's no doubt she's been crying. Judai looks tired to no end, head hanging low as if just about ready to hit the table. He, too, has a cup of tea clasped between his hands, but I'm not sure he'd notice if it suddenly puffed out of existence.

Feeling mischievous, I snatch at the rim of the cup and lift it out of his grip, noting with satisfaction that it jolts him awake.

While I slip into the seat next to him, smirking, he protests half-heartedly, "Hey, I was going to finish that."

Comfortable with the past tense, I raise the half-full mug to my lips and down the tea in one gulp. "Already done," I announce, then add with mock modesty, "No need to thank me."

"You're crazy," Judai states, a small smile on his face.

"Why, thank you!" I jest right back, then take a breath to pull myself together. "You two are doing okay?"

"More or less. Exhausted, mostly," Judai replies, sending a glance Nila's way which I can't decipher. If the girl notices, she doesn't show. There is more to this, so much is clear, but I don't ask.

"Where's Sora and the rest?" Judai changes the subject, and I shrug.

"Camp. I'm sure they'll be here in a bit, they just sent me ahead. There is something I need to clarify with you."

He clicks his tongue. I'm not sure what to make of it... Could be disapproval, could be interest.

"Well, I'm listening."

"It's about this whole six-bed room business..."

"You want to split," Judai basically jumps down my throat, though the tone is neutral. It really puts me on edge. What is he thinking?

"Well, yes, but..."

"It's okay, you don't have to say it," he interrupts yet again, striking me speechless. "You guys are a team. I'm not a part of it. That's fine, I already talked to the innkeeper. She said I can sleep in the stables."

Apparently, Toph is already getting to me, because I feel the urge to punch him. I can't believe this guy! "This isn't about you, you idiot! What are you thinking?!"

I'm pretty sure I know what he's thinking, but I won't say it out loud. Assuming is what started this whole thing. But dang it, it's not like I don't want him around!

"Keep it down, you two!" Nila reminds me of her presence with an emphatic hiss, snapping me out of my rage as a side-effect.

"Sorry," I mumble, then remember that room volume is completely fine. I sigh and turn back to my dumbstruck conversation partner. Boys... "For the love of Agni, Judai, it's not like we're trying to lock you out. You're a nice guy, and you're my friend. It's not you who's the problem, it's Kuzon."

 _Finally!_ I have his attention! "What do you mean?" Judai asks cautiously, eyebrows raised.

I tighten my grip on the mug in my hands. How am I supposed to put this? "Kuzon is... very private. Like, with his body. I won't give details, that's his business. But I kinda disregarded it when I said we can sleep in the same room, sorry for that. He won't undress in front of you."

"I see..." Judai drawls, intently studying the tabletop. Then he pulls himself together and looks up. "I can respect that. But that still means I get to sleep in the stables, doesn't it?"

That's... kinda right, actually. "I'm afraid so. Unless we find another solution."

"You should talk to the innkeeper," Nila suggests. "Maybe you can trade rooms?"

"I already asked if that's an option, but she said she won't do it because most of the kids here are badly injured. That large room which can fit six beds is actually the attic, you see? So we healthy people are the ones who get to heave themselves up two flights of stairs instead of one. Or none, while we're at it."

I nod my understanding. It makes sense, but... "I don't like it."

"It's okay, don't worry about me." Judai flashes a crooked smile which looks more than a little forced. "I've slept in worse places than a hayloft."

I want to bang my head against the table, but opt for pinching the bridge of my nose instead. "That's the problem!" I cry exasperatedly. "You deserve a bed!"

"You know," Nila reintegrates herself into the conversation. "If Kuzon has such a big problem with undressing, you can just have him sleep fully clothed."

"That..." Judai launches into a speech, then pauses. "...is very embarrassing."

I understand the sentiment. Sometimes, the most obvious solution is also the most elusive. Way to overthink things...

Nila shrugs. "The next time someone tells me that you become wiser with age, I'll tell them about you two." She's barely finished her sentence when she starts to yawn. "Well, I'm off to bed. Try not to tie your brains into knots without me."

"You're pushing it," Judai remarks sullenly, causing Nila to smile apologetically.

"Good night," she says and leaves with her cup. I watch her take it to the counter, where a man comes to pick it up.

"Hungry?" Judai distracts me. I check in with my stomach, which is very adamant.

"Yeah, but I want to wait for the others. In fact, I think I should go pick them up. I ran all across town to find this place."

"I'll come with you," Judai offers, and I raise a skeptical brow at him.

"You sure you're up to it? You were half asleep when I arrived."

"Then some fresh air can only be good, right?"

I roll my eyes, both annoyed and amused. I can't deny that it would be nice to have him along. "Hard to argue with that logic."

* * *

It doesn't take long for us to find the gang. I notice that Sokka is the only one carrying a backpack, and I wonder what he has in there that he needs it so desperately.

"Writing stuff," he replies to my inquiry, then abruptly changes the subject, "Did you find me some meat?"

Judai chuckles at that. "You're really into meat, aren't you, Sora? Don't worry, there's hippo cow stew at the inn. I already had a bowl while you were gone, it's delicious. In fact, I think I'll get seconds."

A grin splits Sokka's face and he puts an arm around Aang. "See Kuzon? That guy's got taste!"

"Sora, I'm a vegetarian," Aang sighs, and I file away a new information. "It has nothing to do with taste."

I can't help giggling at the scene. "Let's get moving, before Sora starves on us!"

And that's precisely what we do. On the way, I sum up what Judai and me have been talking about. Aang is not exactly ecstatic about the idea of sleeping with his headband on when he doesn't really need to, but he's willing to do it, for Judai's sake.

Afterwards, Judai explains that he got a few coins from Guard Li and distributes them, two coins each. They're not actually money, they act as vouchers, showing that we have the right to use the inn's service for free. One is for today's dinner, the other for tomorrow's breakfast. We can exchange the coin for a bowl, which will be refilled as often as we need. No info on breakfast yet, but we'll see about that when the time comes.

"But doesn't that mean that you already used up yours?" I ask Judai. I mean, if he already had a bowl and didn't keep it...

"No problem, I'll take yours," he states matter-of-factly, amazingly keeping a straight face while doing so. I curl my lips into a pout. I snatched his tea, I can't say anything against it, even if I wanted. Not without exposing myself to more ribbing, that is.

"Good thing you're deciding that," I end up quipping. "But I call dibs on the first serving!"

"Goes without saying," Judai remarks, and I start wondering if I ascribed more slyness to his prior statement than there actually was. His subsequent yawn and a good stretching of his arms appear to reinforce it, he seems too tired for banter.

"Something wrong?" he asks, making me realize I've been staring.

"I'm okay, but you seem a bit out of it."

"I've been a slave til a couple hours ago, what did you expect? I can barely remember what decent food looks like, and I doubt that infection I caught is already out of my system."

Shock.

"Infection?" I repeat uneasily. That obviously doesn't sound good.

"Four weeks, Kami!" Judai presses, and I remember that that's the time he spent imprisoned. "You've seen Mari getting shipped off, you didn't believe they kept me around for so long because the demand for teenage boys is so small?" He's positively agitated by now, and I can only stand and stare, too shocked to think of anything to do or say.

But fortunately, we have Katara. "Please, Judai. You know it's not Kamina's fault." She lifts a hand to place it on his arm, but lets it hover for a moment to see if he'd swat her away. I'm a bit surprised that he does. I mean, I touched him before, and he never had a problem with it.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles, eyes downcast and voice thick with emotions I can't quite place. Guilt, definitely, but there's more. Could be a trick of the light, but I'm eighty percent sure he's trembling, too.

A gentle push from behind reveals the presence of Sokka, and I serve him my best death glare. This is not the moment to shove people!

Sokka rolls his eyes, then gestures at Judai and mouths what could be a _he needs you._ For all I know, it might as well be _cloud-cuckoo_. Reading lips is nothing I make a habit of doing.

Anyway, I shake my head. Judai already pushed Katara away, what makes Sokka think he'd let me in while he's in that state?

Sokka drags a hand down his face, as if mightily impressed that someone can be that dense, and proceeds to shove me again, this time applying constant force to my shoulder blades until only mere inches separate me from Judai. I know he noticed at least my toes when his eyes flick upwards, surprised, but bright with unshed tears. Sokka pulls a vanishing trick and steps back, leaving me in a decidedly awkward position. Thank you very much, Sokka!

Better get this over with, at least I can blame it on the Water Tribe warrior when this goes wrong. I take the last step and wrap my arms around Judai, fully expecting him to pull away. Which, for some reason, he does _not_ , and I find myself nuzzling into his shoulder.

"Idiot."

It's probably not the most sensitive thing to say, but I'm not exactly a professional as far as being social is concerned. Besides, it's very appropriate. He _is_ an idiot.

But before I can drift off contemplating the many ways of idiocy, I feel a pair of arms lock around my shoulders. Then a tremor.

I don't consciously recognize the signs, not before Judai actually breaks down anyway. But I'm not surprised. I sensed it coming on another level, keeping such strong emotions bottled up is a demanding task. They're bound to burst out sooner or later.

Personally, I feel a bit detached throughout the whole crying fit. I'm not here to cry with him. I'm here to support him, hold him while the sobs rack his body. This whole comforting business is still not my kind of thing, putting together sensitive things to say. But words aren't needed here.

I don't mind. I know we'll be okay.

* * *

 **Now think of a cute kitten, I don't want you to leave completely depressed. Meow!**

 **But _dang_ , it was necessary. Judai used to be a sort of antagonist before I played heaviness-induced switcheroo (details on my profile, if anyone's interested), and part of me is still seething about it. Some things are not to be taken lightly. Hence... this.**

 **FEEL THE ANGST! O.O**

 **Ironically, I listened to "Red Balloon" by Charlie XCX while writing this, which is a super upbeat song from the "Home (2015)" soundtrack. DreamWorks. Yeah...**

 **Meow!**


	27. Mommy Turtle Duck

**I hope the whole alert business works this time. Once again, if you happen to be a follower who jumped here, please go back two chapters if you hadn't read them yet.**

* * *

I think holding hands is generally a sign of affection. There are instances when parents hold their children's hands, to take a walk with them, or play with them, or comfort them. Another case is about lovers, of course. It's a way of connecting, showing someone that they're not alone.

Well, and sometimes, it's about dragging people around. I sent the rest of the gang ahead at some point, gave them a description how they'd find the inn. Luckily, it's not far anymore. I'm not sure what I would have done if that were the case.

After Judai's breakdown, everything I could piece together was a soft "Come on!", and since then, I've been leading him through the dimly lit streets, forcing him to keep setting one foot in front of the other. I don't think there is much more to say, Judai is completely and utterly spent, he probably wouldn't hear me anyway. I guess I should have put some more effort into convincing him to stay at the inn. Nila was right, being older does not necessarily equal being wiser.

A part of me is glad, though. That I was _there_. I mean, I'm not an expert at comforting, but I'm not sure who else could have done it. Again, Nila maybe. She was in the same cell, too, if that is what the whole no-touchy-business is all about. Not that I believe Judai would care at this point, numb from crying and essentially deadweight. I know what it feels like.

I'm not entirely sure what happens once we reach the inn. Could be the light. Could be the smell. Maybe it's the general change of atmosphere which sparks some life in Judai. Either way, he jerks his hand free of mine and rubs his eyes.

"Be right back," he declares drowsily and disappears through the door next to the counter, basically leaving me behind to prettify the landscape. Then I shrug philosophically and look for the others. I spot Toph and Sokka sitting at an oval-shaped table with six chairs, which makes sense. Katara and Aang are standing at the counter, so that's where I go.

"Hey, you two."

"Hey Kamina," Katara greets, smiling briefly before concern returns to her face. "Is Judai okay? We've seen him head for the bathroom."

Ah, so that's the bathroom. Good, one more puzzle piece in place. "He's probably freshening up. He's positively bushed, I'm not sure how he's still walking. And you guys are...?"

"Waiting for Aang's food," Katara explains and I turn at the little Avatar, who's smiling brightly.

"The innkeepers are really nice. They're preparing some noodles especially for me."

"That really is nice! I'm not sure if I had the energy to cook an extra meal for a vegetarian at this time of the day."

Aang cringes. "Yeah..." he drawls awkwardly, then trails off when a man chooses this moment to show up from a backroom which is probably the kitchen. I recognize him, it's the same guy who picked up Nila and Judai's mugs. He recognizes me, too.

"Ah, welcome back, young lady," he says, smiling friendly. "A cup of tea and a bowl of stew, I assume?"

"Sounds awesome!" I smile back and reach into the inside of my surcoat to produce one of the tokens Judai gave me. "I hope it's not too much of a bother."

"Of course not!" He gets a bowl from a cupboard and ladles some delicious smelling stew into it. My mouth waters in anticipation, and while my brain says it would be nicer to wait for Aang like Katara does, my stomach votes for screwing niceness and be on my merry way.

My stomach wins. Carefully balancing tea and stew, I thank the barkeeper and join Sokka and Toph at their table. Sokka is eating with such relish that I'm amazed he actually bothers with a greeting.

"I gotta hand it to you Fire Nation people, you know how to enjoy good meat!" he announces cheerfully. I'm so busy raising a brow at him that I forget to set my stuff down properly and almost tip over my bowl. Good thing Sokka is there to stabilize it.

"Careful with that!"

"Sorry," is the first thing slipping out of my mouth, then Toph's 'Stop apologizing!' comes back to me. So I correct myself, "Thanks. Or whatever," and drop into the seat next to Sokka. "About the meat, I guess I'll take that as a compliment."

"I think it's a bit too spicy," Toph remarks, and I swing my gaze at her.

"Spicy?" I ask skeptically and try a spoon of the stew. The salty, meaty taste is just the way I love it, the hippo cow has just the right degree of tenderness, and is not at all overseasoned. I lick my lips, savoring every drop of it.

"I don't know what your deal is, this is the absolutely _most perfect_ stew I ever ate!"

Toph shrugs. "I bet you've blown up your taste buds already."

Sokka chuckles at Toph's antics. "You should try Flaming Fire Flakes. They're really hot!"

"Suuure they are..."

I smirk. "Well, there wouldn't be much of a 'flaming' if they were cold, right?" Of course I know what Sokka is hinting at, but it's funnier this way.

"True!"

I take another spoon of the sublime stew when a realization hits me: "Sounds like you already had fire flakes, but Toph... didn't?" Even saying it sounds weird. And it enlightens me about how I think of the group as a unit, which actually can't be true. Katara and Sokka are from the Southern Water Tribe. Toph is from the Earth Kingdom. Where Aang hails from is up in the air... literally. One of the four Air Temples. They can't always have traveled together, that's physically impossible.

"Well, it's always Captain Boomerang here who licks the weirdest stuff. There was that one time he drank cactus juice and spent the next couple hours hallucinating. And Sweetness wouldn't let me try it!"

Frankly, the way Toph says it makes me worry more about her rather than Sokka. Although I guess it would be interesting to find out what blind people would be hallucinating about. (Agni, did that really arouse my curiosity? Next thing I know, I'll be trying the cactus juice myself... Turtle whiskers, I want to try it.)

"Well, I do hope he didn't start hallucinating on fire flakes," I reply, quirking an eyebrow at Sokka. "Did you?"

"Does getting a blurry vision count?" he asks innocently, and I feel my jaw go slack. I mean, _what?!_

I must have said that out loud, because _both_ Sokka and Toph start laughing.

"Gotcha!" Sokka crows, jabbing his spoon at me with delight. "Your eyes start watering when you eat something too spicy. Didn't think of that, huh?"

Of course. Sokka was messing with my associations, and I completely fell for it. I roll my eyes to cover up my embarrassment, although I suppose it's a little too late.

"What's so funny?"

I look up to spot Judai claiming the seat next to me... and my tea cup. He looks infinitely better, the traces of the crying fit have vanished from his face and he seems halfway awake again.

"How are you feeling?" I still can't help asking, too worried to react to his question. Sokka's extreme omnivore tendencies have little significance here.

Judai shrugs, probably faking nonchalance. "As good as can be, given the circumstances." He downs my tea, and just like that, I've lost my appetite. I can't eat when my stomach is clenching with self-reproach. How can I insist on having the first serving when the person next to me is _starving?!_

I push the bowl in front of Judai, refusing to look at him. Maybe I should have. Maybe I would have seen the flick stinging my temple coming. Flabbergasted, I turn my head at the culprit, unable to bring out a word. Judai sighs.

"I know what you're thinking. You think I'm a wreck, and I need someone to take care of me. I admit it, I could have done without those last four weeks, but I'm still very much capable of functioning without you being such a mommy turtle duck."

Oh Agni, are we playing the assumption game again? "I don't..."

"Yes you do. You just proved it. With this." He slides the bowl of stew back to me. "I'm not hungry. I wouldn't have returned my own bowl if I were. I can judge my stomach myself. I know you mean well, but do you see Sora and Toki making a fuss?"

It makes sense, I guess, assumption game or not. So instead of protesting, this time I resort to massaging my temples. Whatever I do, it's wrong. Mistakes over mistakes, I never get anything _right._

No. Stop. I won't start down that road again. It never leads to anything but misery.

"I'm sorry," I sigh, putting my hands back on the table. "I didn't mean to act patronizing. I'll try to avoid the mommy turtle duckiness from now on."

"You'd better." Interestingly enough, that almost petulant statement comes from Toph. I whip around to catch her blow a strand out of her face. "We didn't add you to the group to have Kari all over again."

I don't bother mentioning that they didn't add me to the group. I did that all on my own, and I wasn't thinking straight at that point. And... What did Katara do to offend Toph? Probably the same thing I did to offend Judai.

"Is there something you want to tell me, Toki?"

Oh, it's Katara. Looks like Aang got his vegetarian noodles, because the two finally join us at the table.

"Nope. Except that birds of a feather apparently _do_ flock together. No wonder you met her first."

"Technically, I met Kuzon first. Granted, we didn't talk, but..." Hmm... Does it count as 'meeting' if the acknowledgement is one-sided?

Toph shrugs again. "Same difference, birdie."

Sokka almost snorts his stew at his sister. "I like that one!" he announces as soon as he swallowed. Even then he keeps chuckling. "Birdie..."

Neither Aang nor me grace him with an answer. It's harmless enough phrasing, but if we go further from here, Judai may start suspecting that there is more to it than Sokka's weird sense of humor. That, and you shall not feed the mocking bat.

With that in mind, I concentrate on eating my poor, neglected stew. Judai stands up to get his... my... our mug refilled, and I claim it at the first opportunity. Aang laughs. Judai pouts. I return the cup to him, so he can go again. (No, I'm not gonna do it. Why would I? I have a bowl of stew to take care of after all.) It's amusing. And avoids mommy turtle duckiness. Sokka gleefully announces that you should be careful what you wish for, and shoves his own mug into Judai's hands as well. (No point in having two people walk the same way when one is enough, right?) It doesn't cross my mind that the roles are reversed once I hand my bowl over to Judai, and he makes sure to remind me. The barkeeper is amused, too. In the end, he gives me the whole teapot. Judai is quick to cry dire wrongness, but laughs with everyone at how no one thought of that earlier. Then again, I guess it was too much fun to boss Fire Nation people around. Solution unnecessary.

All in all, it's a good way to end the day. We return the dishes and pick up a key instead.

* * *

I don't expect the room to be much different from my own, because, well... I sleep in the attic. But as it turns out, it's very different indeed.

The room is somewhat U-shaped, to allow for the staircase and the door to swing open on one side, and a washroom on the other. But else, it's treated as if it were square-shaped. The sloped ceiling makes it necessary to separate the room into three, with the outer sides mainly for sleeping and the center as a sort of lounge where you don't have to watch your head. Two double beds occupy the far corners of the room, as well as a bunk bed in the middle, where the tapering roof is just spacious enough. The floor is covered in straw mats (a furtive glance in Toph's direction reveals her clinging to Sokka's arm for guidance), and a rug-table-contraption like the one at Kiran's place as well as a shelf complete the picture. Four bedside tables with lanterns, already lit, sprinkle the room. Two other lanterns illuminate the table. A positive surprise, however, are the slide screens on either side of the center third.

"Check this out!" Aang cheers and pulls at one of the screens, closing off the hindmost sleeping area and disappearing from sight. "I call the bed in here!"

"I guess it does solve the undressing problem," I remark, absentmindedly rubbing the back of my neck. "You brought writing things, right, Sora? So you probably want to work on something tonight, and you'll need light for that."

Sokka catches my drift. He nods. "Keeps everything logical."

"Er... Guys?" Judai pipes up. "Good thing you can read each other's minds, but I'm kinda new here."

"Simple," I take it upon myself to explain. "Toki won't be bothered by Sora lighting up the room, so she will share the bunk bed with him. That leaves two double beds for the rest of us, which is usually a reason to separate boys and girls. But you and Kuzon sharing would defeat the point of this whole brouhaha, and with you guys split up, Kari and me are practically set. Anyone with objections?"

The question is superfluous, of course. Aang couldn't be happier with the arrangement, Katara smiles at his enthusiasm, Judai's face betrays a relief I can definitely emphasize with, and Sokka and Toph don't seem to care.

"Terrific," Judai ends up breaking the brief silence. "If I had to sit through a school trip discussion, something would have burst into flames." As if on cue, he lets out a huge yawn. Without wasting any more time, he turns around and I give him some privacy by closing 'our' slide screen. "I leave the lanterns to you, Kami!" comes a last call, then silence.

I blink at the rather... intriguing statement.

"I expected something like 'good night'," Sokka deadpans, and I nod deliberately.

"Kind of, yeah," I drawl, then shrug and turn to face the group. "Anyway, we need to talk."

* * *

 **That bed arrangement... was supposed to look different. In (bad) romances, I noticed that authors tend to shoehorn the Intended Couple into sleeping together by... well, having them sleep together for some contrived reason. ("Whoops, we booked you the wrong room, and the hotel is too full to find another!")  
** **Ah, well, it's not so much of a deal that I need to cry over it. Since I'm not writing a romance here, nobody actually goes off on it (except for Aang, because Aang goes off on everything). The Gaang is used to sleeping close to each other, while Kami and Judai are just glad that they're not getting everyone involved in possible nightmare sessions and couldn't care less about the lacking air between their mattresses.**

 **I'm not even sure why it's such a big deal in romances. Sure, marriage bed symbolism, but else? Maybe it's just me, but it's a freaking BED, not a wedding altar!  
Hmm, probably raging hormones. Raging hormones and 42 are the answer to pretty much everything.**

 **Zentauria over and out!**


	28. Burning Lantern

With most of the difficult stuff occupying the space in my brain out of the way, I can finally concentrate on giving Sokka the report he wants. I'm not sure why it matters, but it's a good feeling to get it out in the open for the others to deconstruct. Well, and also for myself. A lot of stuff makes more sense in hindsight.

I sum up how I walked too far away from Appa. That landslide I heard? Probably the cave being sealed. Someone saw me, and possibly assumed I saw something as well. But they weren't going to let me get away anyway, so yeah. That cage smelling of burned wood? Figures. Just wondering where they got all the wood. Isn't there a simpler way to determine firebending abilities which doesn't involve putting up new stakes all the time? (Toph is for attacking. Sokka remarks on how the slavers probably didn't like the idea of getting themselves set on fire by a spirited teen, or miss out on a child who's too scared to fight back. Give them something to burn and leave them feel unobserved is a good idea. And I'm scared of Sokka.) I continue with how I tried to jump out, and Aang gasps in shock. He then proceeds to hem and haw a bit before revealing that earthbender guy quite possibly saved my life, or at least prevented a couple bones from getting broken. With my current level, I wouldn't have been able to control the flight phase of the jump, maybe launch myself into the ceiling, or the stakes. The latter makes me shudder, impaling yourself is probably not the most pleasant way to die. I hastily resume my tale to get the image out of my mind.

I talk about registry-guy (Toph wonders aloud how much money I may have raked in, making me shift uncomfortably), about meeting Judai and Nila (I leave out the details) and how I got the idea to use meditation to pretend being dead (really not the best of ideas; apart from the risk of permanent damage, there is also the thing about cutting up corpses to find out what caused the death in the first place... good thing the doctor wasn't a professional). I explain how I sneezed earthbender guy and doctor into the wall (eliciting general laughter from my audience), how I ran into swordwoman and disarmed her, and how I would have preferred sucking the sword into my own hands over blowing it away if I would have had any idea how to do it (Aang promises to teach me). How I got recaptured, freed myself and took the last two slavers down with a chair. What a struggle it was to get everyone up and running (Judai certainly wasn't the only defeatist in there... I wonder what made him change his mind), and how we were caught, explaining why earthbender guy mistook me for some sort of spirit. Then Aang fills me in about his and Toph's side of the rescue, how they tracked down the firebenders with their seismic sense and freed them. It's the same way they found me. According to Toph, airbenders have a telltale lightness to their steps, something she mentions casually enough for me to take a moment to process... And then my brain implodes.

"Can you say that again?" I ask, half hoping I misheard. It can't be right, can it?

"What? That we're around two pussyfooters?" Blunt as always. It's not the same wording, but apparently she means it. I can barely wrap my head around the idea.

"I don't understand. I mean, yes, I can airbend, but I'm not an _Air Nomad_. I obviously don't airbend my feet. Why would my steps be any different from regular Fire Nation people?"

"Well, you obviously _do_ airbend your feet," Toph comments and turns to Aang for an explanation. "Twinkletoes?"

Sifu Avatar scrunches up his face, I can almost see his mind whirl. "I've never heard about anything like that. I'm sure there are records, but..." He trails off and starts tracing circles on the tabletop with a finger. "I don't know. I _should_ know."

Katara, who happens to be sitting next to Aang, puts an arm around his shoulders. "Aang, I know how important your heritage is to you, but it's not possible to memorize every bit of Air Nomad history. And that's okay. I'm sure there are relics out there. And you can ask your past lives! The knowledge of your people is not lost."

Right... there is that. Avatar or not, Air Nomad or not, Aang is just a kid, with limited knowledge and limited memory. Must be harsh to be the last of your kind...

The little Avatar looks up to face Katara, and they hold a long gaze. At this moment, I'm willing to bet every last coin on them being mightily in love. Sokka seems to share the sentiment, he turns away with his nose wrinkled in mild disgust. He has the decency not to comment, though.

"Thank you, Katara," Aang says, smile back in place, then directs his attention at me. He scratches the back of his head, apparently deep in thought. "I can only guess for now, but I think it may have to do with a subconscious need to be light on your feet. To avoid something, or generally being a hectic person. Could that be?"

To avoid something? More like _someone_. A lot of someones, but one someone especially. Aang's words flood my mind with unwelcome pictures, memories of fleeing from Hide, of zigzagging through crowds, of flitting along corridors, in and out of sight. Light on my feet indeed.

"Yeah..." I mumble testily. "Could be."

I place my hands on the table and push myself upwards. I'm not mad at Aang for figuring it out, but the memories have put me in a generally bad mood. Plus, it's late. Time to follow Judai's example and catch some sleep.

"I'm off to bed," I announce firmly and turn around. Open the slide screen and close it behind me to be enveloped in the silence and relative darkness of the sleeping area. The calming effect is immediate, and I realize what kind of impression I must have left. Not a good one, definitely. My upbringing asserts itself, demanding instant rectification. I take a deep breath and poke my head back into the center room, to be met with confusion and skepticism.

"I'm sorry, that was rude of me." I sigh. "Thanks for the clarification. And good night."

Aang smiles reassuringly, signaling the lack of hard feelings. "Good night."

"Good night," Katara joins in. Sokka rummages through his backpack, but lifts a hand in acknowledgment. Toph yawns. I guess I can leave them like this.

Sliding the screen shut again, I heave a breath of relief before finally paying heed to the bed. The lanterns are still emitting a wan light, as promised, and I can easily make out Judai's sleeping form, curled up under the blanket. I can't help smiling at the sight. It radiates serenity, something we both need. I tiptoe around the bed to the lantern on Judai's side to blow it out before taking care of my own side of things, get rid of my clothes and flop down on the bed with a rapt sigh. Sweet softness! Everything left now is extinguishing the last lantern and waiting for sleep to set in.

Which, as per tradition, takes a while. I toss and turn, constantly rolling from one side to the other in a vain attempt to find the most comfortable position possible. Without the influence of my friends, my mind refuses to settle. I think about Aang, his promise to protect the people of the Fire Nation from the other nations' vengeance. Can he really do it? Does he have enough power? He might be the Avatar, but he's still only one human child who can only look after one place at a time. Who is to say that one army won't march in while he's busy placating the other?

Another matter my thoughts circle around is my bed mate. After so much teasing, I can't help considering... I mean, yes, we do stick to each other like glue, but that's mostly because of a shortage of alternatives. We happened to be stuck in the same cell, and we're close in age. It's a weird basis for a friendship, and apart from that, I don't even know if we have enough in common to make it work in the long term. But I'm certainly willing to try. I don't want to lose the first Fire Nation friend I had in _ages_.

The question related to both is: What exactly do I want to talk about? There is that vague idea of loyalty. Treachery? And how do I phrase it without giving away too much? Judai has been very accepting so far, didn't question all the oddities we threw at him. How far can I stretch his patience before he snaps? Do I even have the right to do it, morality-wise? Wouldn't it be like... taking advantage of him? But even so, I'll go crazy if I don't talk about it soon.

I feel the urge to groan, to scream, to growl; to vent the frustration in some form. I swallow it, I don't want to wake anyone. Instead, I pull the blanket over my head, trying to shut out the cruel world I had the misfortune to be born into. It quickly becomes stiflingly hot. Bah!

In the end, I kick the blanket to my feet, cross my arms behind my head and close my eyes for a breathing exercise. Not that it's the right way to do it, but I don't feel like taking the professional route right now. It's calming enough anyway, and finally puts my mind to rest. For a few minutes, at least. Here goes nothing...

I just managed to drift into a semiconscious state when I pick up on... something. A shift in the air I can't quite place before I'm fully aware of my surroundings and the gasps become increasingly hard to miss. Alarmed and very much awake, I shoot up into a sitting position, just in time to find Judai doing very much the same – only much slower and less frantic. His breathing is still erratic and disconcertingly loud, but even that fades quickly.

"I'm sorry, did I wake you up?" he asks softly, but I shake my head and shrug.

"Not really. Nothing to apologize for. You're not the only one who has trouble sleeping, y'know?"

Judai emits a sound which sounds suspiciously like a huff. And I mean the derisive kind. "Figures," he mutters, tone matching my prior observation, _which I do not like_. I frown, anger bubbling in my chest.

"Now what's _that_ supposed to mean?"

I don't get an answer, and the moonlight shining through the open shutters of the window next to the stairs is not bright enough to read Judai's face. To see if I can spy the remorse I feel entitled to. But I do see that he has kicked back the blanket by now, and goes on to hug his knees. A sight which is awfully familiar, and it makes me want to slap myself for jumping to conclusions.

It wasn't disdain I heard. It was _bitterness_. Which probably makes my own hostility into an overreaction. No wonder he doesn't deem it worthy of a reply.

"Sorry," I mutter, directing my gaze at my outstretched legs. "Misunderstanding."

"Who knows..." is what I get back. Probably the most cryptic thing I ever heard.

"Come again?"

Judai sighs and lets go of his knees in favor of crossing his arms behind his head and flopping back into the pillow. "I'm tired. Even I don't know what I'm saying."

I feel a wry smile tugging at my lips. "Welcome to the club. Do you think you can go back to sleep?"

There is a moment of silence, then: "I'm not sure I want to." He sounds almost disgusted, and I try to ignore the worry gnawing away at me. I'd tell him he has to, but I don't want to pull the mommy turtle duck again. Plus, I have no room to speak.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"What's there to talk about?"

Oh, I see. We're going down that path. "I don't know. But I know that most things become easier to bear if you share them with someone else."

"Look, I don't need you to tell me again that it's over, okay?" Judai growls in response and turns his back on me, head tucked in between his arms. "I know that."

Classic defense move. It stings a bit, and at first I'm surprised. Then I wonder what I'm so surprised about. All that turmoil... I guess it's called a 'personal issue' for a reason. Some secrets are meant to be kept. No matter how much I want to help, if that's what he thinks is best, then... so be it.

"Okay," I say as neutrally as I can manage. "I won't ask further."

"Thank you." Judai relaxes, I can see his arms unlock. He swings his legs over the edge of the bed and sits up to grab the lantern on the nightstand. What he does afterwards is... a mystery. With his back still turned at me, everything I know is that he keeps the lantern in his lap and appears to _wrestle_ with it. Curious and slightly unnerved, I crawl across the bed to look over his shoulder. But with the lantern in Judai's shadow, it really is too dark this time around.

"Uh... What are you doing?"

"Concentrating here," he shoots me down, voice strained. "But maybe you can see if you find..."

Whatever he wanted me to find, it's overridden by a hiss. The room lights up, and for a moment, my attention is split between the flame in the lantern and Judai reflexively putting his thump and index into his mouth.

"Blazing beeswax," he mumbles around them while I'm still busy processing the whole incident. The burning lantern allows for only one explanation, but... _what?_

"You're a firebender?" I ask tentatively, and Judai finally pulls his fingers out of his mouth.

"Firebender?" he snorts, half laughing, half scoffing. "That's a stretch. I can't even light a candle without burning myself."

Whoa... I don't know what to say. But it looks like I'm not the only one with an infinite supply of bending-shaped frustration.

Lacking any better ideas, I cover the last couple inches and sit on the bed's edge next to Judai. I'm not sure whether he notices or not, he seems mesmerized by the little lantern in his lap. He even holds it like something precious and fragile. It's saddening to watch, and I direct my gaze at the flame.

Which is not a good move. Not at all. I just need to look at it, and right away, I feel envy rearing its ugly head.

 _Do you have any idea how much better my life would be if I could do that?_ Seriously, I wouldn't even mind getting burned.

I try to shake off the notion, but I can't suppress it altogether. It lingers, gratingly.

"Seems like the universe hates us both, huh?"

"Hmm? Oh..." Seems like I succeeded in startling Judai out of his reverence. "I'm sorry. I guess I shouldn't complain about my wrecked bending in front of a nonbender."

Wait a minute... What? Wrecked? Does that mean what I think it does? "It's fine, but... What do you mean with 'wrecked'?"

"Broken, messed up, ruined, disabled, weakened, out of whack... Take your pick," Judai snarks a rather impressive row of synonyms for someone who claims not to read. Then he shakes his head and adds listlessly, "Ah, forget it. It's not your problem."

He's right, it probably isn't. But that doesn't mean I'm going to forget. The golden word to latch onto is 'weakened' if you ask me, implying that it used to be stronger. It's a bit weird to think that people can randomly lose their fire, but not unheard of. When teaching firebending, it's generally said that the power comes from a desire to fight for and protect everything precious to you, something which is an essential part of human nature and shouldn't actually be possible to lose. Which is why I never believed it when I heard stuff like that. But now that the living and crestfallen proof is sitting next to me, I wonder what it means to lose your firebending. How does it even work? If it's fueled by fighting spirit, then okay, I can raise my hand and attest to Judai's lacking in that department. But from what I've gathered so far, it doesn't seem like a recent problem. He fought back against the slavers at the beginning, right? So there's no way he would have been sorted as a nonbender.

Something's wrong here, deeply wrong. The question is: What?

* * *

 **Who saw that coming? o.ô**

 **I've been kicking that idea around since... I don't even remember, but I have an outtake from chapter 17 where Judai firebends briefly to show how he knows what happens to firebenders. He is one. He just doesn't make a point of it because it's so pathetic.**

 **So yeah, loads of headcanon again. Since the Fire Nation twisted firebending to be fueled by rage, my theory is that Sifu Jerkbender's problem is a lot more common than he would know. I think even Iroh suffered from it, and that it was the real reason for his "dragon-slaying". Even Ursa being a firebender is my personal Epileptic Tree (or an off-the-wall theory to those whose vocabulary hasn't been ruined by TV Tropes). I mean, she _is_ Roku's granddaughter, right? But she doesn't have the rage to meet firebending requirements. It makes firebending heavily personality-based on one hand, on the other hand though, I also believe that the propaganda that children are fed in school is enough to keep the flame alive, and some twist of fate is needed to knock it down.**

 **Oh, and I've been doing Chinese. If you put Aang's name through a dictionary, you come up with 'peace' for 安 and 'rise' for 昂, which I think is a very airbender-y name. The 卡 Sok _ka_ and _Ka_ tara share means 'card' though, or 'to block/stop/check'. I'm not sure how it connects to the Water Tribe siblings, if there is anything to connect at all.  
Anyway, I took a pinyin dictionary and tried to build names for my two non-lovebirds here. Kamina kept me rolling on the sofa with all those oddly fitting meanings and the accidental irony. I settled for 錺秘凪 (anyone with a better grasp on Chinese is welcome to correct me), mostly because it looks nice. I couldn't find a Chinese meaning for the first character, but the Japanese one is 'metal jewelry', so yeah. *shrugs* The second one means 'secret', and the third... Oh boy. Again, I couldn't find a Chinese meaning for it, but the Japanese one is 'lull'. As in non-existent movement of air. Delightful, isn't it? And since it's the 'na' part of the name, her nickname removes that part. There is no non-existence of wind around the people she trusts. _Boom, baby!_  
I mean, it's all entirely accidental, and I laughed so freaking hard, but _wow_! I love it!  
Judai, on the other hand, was difficult. Finding a nice character for the first syllable was easy enough, and also somewhat funny when I found a _ju_ -pinyin which means 'to rescue'. The _dai_ though, _goodness gracious_! That seems to be one horrible word in Chinese. Evil, lazy, dumb, depraved, poison, dangerous... and fetters. Did I mention fetters? Or capture? There is also that one which can be sorted as _dai_ , but is more commonly pronounced as _li_ (because there's a million Lis... I'm sorry). It's harmless enough in and of itself, it means 'attached to', but combined with a certain nu-character, we get** _**nú lì,**_ **which means...**

 **(Take a guess. Hint: It fits. It's cringy. It's kinda obvious.)**

 _ **Slave.**_ **Holy macaroni, I can't even... _What did I do?_ That was the point when I told myself that I'd take anything which is not inherently negative and makes at least an iota of sense. There are a couple harmless _dai_ s like belt, bag, dynasty, big or loan, but... yeah.  
I ended up with 菊戴. The first character means chrysanthemum, and the hard-won second one is 'support' (or 'to wear [a hat/glasses]', but let's ignore that).  
**

 **Okay, that's it for this overly long A/N. If you'll kindly excuse me now, I'm off to drown my sorrows and regrets about Judai's name in a banana smoothie...**


	29. A Matter of Trust

I can't tell how long we've been sitting around when I catch myself scrutinizing Judai again. With the robe off, I can fully appreciate how thin he is. I could count his ribs if I felt like it, and it's not pretty. Still, it could be worse, I guess. Can't say I would categorize him as a walking skeleton, and I saw with my own eyes how much of his strength he retained. That he looks so sickly now is probably the lighting. The shadows cast by the flickering lantern are kind of eerie.

I don't like the sight. I turn my gaze at the ground, but the image stays. It makes me uncomfortable, and I start tapping my right foot at some point. The bare skin makes absolutely no sound against the straw mats underneath.

The silence becomes unbearable, and I can't help looking up to string a question together: "Can I ask you something?"

Judai sighs and places the lantern back on the bedside table. "Fire away," he permits, but he doesn't look at me. I understand, though. I mean, why would he?

"Did you apologize to Sora and Kari?"

"Eh?"

He obviously didn't see that coming. Frankly, neither did I. I have about a million questions, and this particular one is pretty low on the priority list. Why of all things I blurted it out... Hmm. I guess because it's safe.

Another welcome effect: It snaps Judai out of his lethargy. He leans back on his hands, a mixture of guilt and exasperation showing on his face.

"You mean because of that 'snow savage' thing?" he moans. Almost wails, actually... That was one sudden pitch-heightening, and I'm just short of dissolving into giggles. I hope it doesn't show, but I guess it does, judging from the look Judai gives me. But he doesn't say anything, just rolls his eyes and ends the silent exchange. When his voice cracks, it cracks, nothing worth dwelling on. "Anyway, no, I haven't. But I suppose I should."

"Yeah, that would be a good idea."

"Tomorrow then," Judai announces and flops to his back. I pretend not to feel bothered by his invading my bed-space... At least he's lying down.

Silence reigns for a moment. I ponder lying down myself, then suddenly: "You hear that?"

Hmm? I listen intently. Indeed, it's not as silent as I thought. My eyes are drawn to the open window, could it really be... "Rain!"

"Rain..." Judai repeats pensively. "Rain means customers."

"Uh-huh..." Right, that's a statement I _totally_ expected.

"Come on, don't be like that."

Huh? "Like what?" I'm confused, and ripping my eyes away from the window doesn't really help matters. Judai looks peaceful enough, just lying around, arms crossed as a pillow and eyes closed.

"Like dismissive."

"I'm not being dismissive."

Judai cracks open an eye, and I can sense the disbelief. But it's true!

"I just didn't know what else to say..." I offer meekly. "I'm sorry if I hurt you..."

I'm not sure if I should feel reassured or offended when he chuckles briefly and sits up. "A more upbeat tone would be a good start."

I hum noncommittally. What am I supposed to say about that? Thanks for the advice? Shut up, I'm not _that_ backward?

"You're full of surprises, you know that?" Judai rips me out of my internal debate. I'm not sure why, but it's kind of amusing to hear.

"I'll say," I retort, looking up while a small smile sneaks onto my lips. "I didn't peg you as the type who laughs a lot."

"Well, I didn't peg _you_ as the type who apologizes a lot. Back in the cave, you fought and mouthed off and you were just so amazing and inspiring..."

I raise a doubtful brow. "Inspiring? You hand gagged me, mister! Wouldn't call that inspired."

Hard to tell in the dim firelight combined with Judai's skin color, but I could swear he's turning red around the nose. He runs a hand through his hair, or at least tries as much. The tangles won't let him go through with it. He's flustered, and it's... cute?

What an idea.

While I contemplate that discovery, ascribing it to the fact that the hand movement distracted from the decidedly uncute rib cage, Judai pulls his act together. "Yes, I did," he states emphatically. "And I'd do it again if it means saving your sassy butt from getting beaten."

Oh really, would he now? "Not on my watch, you won't," I call upon the sassy butt in question. "I prefer to decide by myself when I get my butt kicked, thank you very much."

Judai shivers. Maybe I overdid it, it's not like I don't know what he's aiming at. Still, I think that needed to be said.

"Okay, my turn to give a lesson in social skills: Being protective is one thing. Being patronizing is something else altogether." Wait. That sounds familiar. "You're not the one to decide what I'm allowed to say and what not, daddy turtle duck."

Whether the last addition softened the blow or spearheaded it, I'm not sure. Judai buries his face in his hands with a muffled groan anyway. "I guess I deserved that."

"I guess we both did," I sigh, already pondering the best way to coax my friend out of his fingers again. In the end, I settle for standard procedure: poking. Judai's arm springs to his side, defending from an intruder that's long gone.

"Hey!" my friend complains, just quiet enough not to wake the others. I don an innocent grin.

"What, no puppy noise this time? Pity."

Yup, it's official: Judai is capable of blushing. "Shut up!"

"Aww, why? It's cute."

"I don't..." He cuts himself off, opts for a huff and takes a dive into his pillow. I hastily lean to the opposite side, hoping to avoid getting a foot lodged into my hip. Judai doesn't even notice. "That's it, I'm not talking to you anymore. You're behaving like an eight-year-old."

"Right, and you're a real paragon of maturity over there."

"Hmm, sounds like something's buzzing in here..."

I suppose I'd feel offended if I weren't so busy chuckling. "You _do_ know you're essentially admitting defeat with that?"

"You _do_ know you're asking pointless questions?"

"Always." Still giggling, I climb over Judai's legs to slip back into my own bed. The heat has subsided significantly, and I welcome the blanket to cover the goosebumps on my arms. Nothing like a soft mattress and fresh bedclothes!

A low "I'm sorry" penetrates the blissful fog in my mind and I turn to Judai, not quite sure I didn't mishear.

"Hmm? For what?"

He buries himself even deeper into his pillow, if that's possible. "For invading your space like that, back... there. I wasn't thinking."

"It's okay," I assure him gently. "So long as it doesn't happen again."

"It won't. Promise."

I find myself smiling mildly at the sincerity in Judai's words. Resentment I didn't know I was carrying disappears, leaving me with a feeling of warmth and peace... and sleepiness. I close my eyes and curl into a more comfortable position. About time that my mind settles for the night...

* * *

That I wake to strangled sobs tells me that my dreams couldn't have been all that terrible, if I had any. Without even bothering to shed my blanket, I do a crab and belly-flop next to Judai, covering us both in the process – something Judai neglected, and it's painfully hard to miss. His body is way too cold.

Something keeps me from trying to hug him this time, some feeling it would only make matters worse. Maybe it's just my fear of rejection speaking. But the upshot is that I pass the time lying around, chin resting on my crossed arms, wondering if there is something else I can do while Judai next to me is shaking and clawing at his pillow. Is there any way to get my hands on a handkerchief? I doubt it.

I don't know how long it takes for Judai to calm down, to cry himself into exhaustion and lie still.

"Nightmare again?" I ask in an attempt to be soothing. Among all those useless questions such as 'Are you okay?' or 'Better now?', this one seems to be the least useless.

"No," Judai whispers, however, sending a flash of surprise through me which I quickly brush aside. "Just stressed."

"I see..." So he didn't sleep at all, I guess. I wonder if I should try again with asking about it?

Turns out I don't need to: "It's just... I should be happy, right? That I'll be on my way home tomorrow. But truth be told... I'm scared. I've been gone for a whole month. I can't help thinking, 'What if something happened? What if a fire broke out and I wasn't there to quench it? What if grandma fell ill?' What if some problem arose and I couldn't be there because I was too stupid to check my surroundings?"

Whoa there! That's some serious self-blame, is it not? "You know it's not your fault, Ju! Besides, I'm sure your grandma is okay. I mean, I don't know her, and losing a loved one can't be all that easy. But you know how we Fire Nation people are. We soldier on, day after day." I free a hand and place it on one of his. "Don't beat yourself up. It'll be fine."

Judai responds by releasing the pillow and gripping said hand instead, tight enough to be uncomfortable. But I don't mind, just squeeze back until I feel him relax, noting with relief that he's not freezing anymore.

Silently agreeing that we both have enough, we let go of each other. I roll to my side, back facing Judai. I said everything I had to say, the rest is his business to sort out, while I probably should take my blanket and return to my side of the bed. But I can't bring myself to do it. It would require moving from my current spot, which is way too comfortable.

"Did you just call me 'Ju'?"

So much for comfortable. I seriously need a second to think about that, but I'm afraid I did. "Well, 'Judai' is a bit of a mouthful, isn't it?"

"It's two syllables, it's not _that_ horrible."

"Does it bother you?"

Pause for reflection, then: "No. It doesn't."

I smile to myself. "See? Problem solved." It was an odd question, though... Kinda apropos of nothing. I wonder what's going on in Judai's head... "Are you okay?"

"I'll be fine. Even if something happened, there is no point in fretting over it now."

"True." I keep silent for a minute, then decide it's safe to ask one of the more important questions haunting my mind. "There is something I've been meaning to ask..." I pause to give Judai time to react, but nothing happens. So I continue, "How comes we're hugging and holding hands all the time, but Kari isn't even allowed to touch you?"

"We're barely touching now," Judai points out, voice hardening. "I've had enough of strange people touching me to last me a lifetime."

That... hurts. "Do you want me to leave you alone then?"

I can hear Judai sigh behind my back. "You don't feel like a stranger, Kami. I don't know you well, but it doesn't matter. You've seen me at my lowest, and I tried to pull you down with me. And yet you fought to snap me out of it. You still are. I trust you."

 _I trust you._ Oh, AgniAgniAgniAgni! I don't know how to deal with that! Trust? That's just about the last thing I needed! I came here to detach myself, not to build an even stronger attachment!

"I'm sorry, Ju, but... I'm afraid I'm a disappointment."

"What makes you think that?" He sounds puzzled rather than pained. And in its own cruel way, that's even worse.

"Because I can't trust you the same way." I roll from beneath the blanket, out into the cold of the night. Put some distance between Judai and myself. Why is destiny so unfair? Why is my airbending getting in the way of... _everything?_

I curl into myself, choking on tears. And suddenly, the roles switch – for this time, it's Judai who picks me up. Literally grabs my arm and pulls until I find myself sitting on his thighs in what would have been an awkward kneeling embrace if I had any strength to spend on caring about such details. But like this, I just collapse into Judai's arms, grateful for the warmth and support.

"It's okay," he whispers soothingly. "I know it's different for you. Take your time. No reason to cry."

I can hardly believe that someone can have so much unwavering faith. Especially in someone like me. It's overwhelming; relieving, elating, and a bit terrifying.

I pull back, by now hiccuping only a little tiny bit. Head hanging low, I wipe my eyes with limited success. I feel so hot, way too hot. It's all so new, I want to run away and hide under a stone. I can't handle this situation.

"What did I do to deserve you?" I manage to croak out. "Why aren't you asking more questions? I could be a spy for all you know."

The notion must be rather amusing, because Judai bursts into that special Judai-laugh which never fails to lift my spirits. "A spy? Please. As if spies were so obvious about their origin. Plus, if you were a spy, what could you possibly gain from befriending a busboy living in the back of the beyond?"

I hum thoughtfully. That's kind of an argument, actually. "I don't know. Though I've been told they're plenty talkative, those busboys and barmaids."

"Are you trying to tell me something?" Judai inquires in mock-offense, causing me to smirk smugly.

"Not at all, why would you think that?"

I snicker, feeling better by the second. Before I can think better of it, I fling my arms around my friend, almost knocking him over in the process. Almost.

"Thank you, Judai. Thank you so much. You have no idea how much it means to me." That phrasing is stupid. There is more I want to say. So why don't I? What keeps me from adding it?

I can feel Judai's arms wrap around me to return the hug, and I realize I'm being irrational. What could happen? Besides, using one's tongue isn't all that hard.

"You have no idea how much _you_ mean to me. I wish... I wish I could tell you, but..."

"Some things are better left unsaid."

I nod, knowing he would feel it. "It's better for everyone involved. Including you."

Assuming he wouldn't turn away from me if he knew (I'm daring to hope by now), Judai could be prosecuted for not reporting me. Apart from that... I don't want to set him up for the same dilemma I'm facing. Friend versus Fire Nation.

Actually, now that we're here... I guess it's now or never. I slip off Judai's legs, realizing only now how inappropriate and weird that was. No time to go all red and stutter-y though, I've got more important stuff to think about.

I take a deep breath. "Say the Fire Nation oath with me?"

"The _what?_ " Judai blinks at me nonplussed. Can't say I blame him, that request should be coming well out of the blue from his perspective. "I mean, sure, let me just..."

He scoots over to the edge of the bed. I follow, it makes sense to plant your feet on solid ground and sit up properly. Once we're both settled, I close my eyes and bow my head to get into the right mindset. Humans are creatures of habit, after all, and beds are always radiating a temptation to slouch.

It speaks for itself that Judai and me don't need a signal to start at the same time, attuned as we are to citation partners. Judai said he'd been to school for only four years, meaning he's been out for five. I'm not surprised to find it doesn't matter. The oath was made to stick.

 _My life I give to my country.  
With my hands I fight for Firelord Ozai and our forefathers before him.  
With my mind I seek ways to better my country,  
and with my feet may our March of Civilization continue._

I've been speaking those words for eight years straight. Never saw anything wrong with them. So what now? Do they feel wrong now?

"Are you alright, Kami?"

"More or less. Bet that was the strangest request you've ever heard, huh?"

"Nah," Judai proclaims, however. I tilt my head questioningly, and my friend shrugs. "You'd be surprised what kind of weird stuff people blabber about when they're drunk. One time, there was that guy who set one of our tables on fire and sang about how he'd dance on it until it breaks. He didn't actually pull it off, but still. Recipe for disaster, I'm telling you."

What the... Okay, that _is_ weird, gotta hand him that. "And the inn is still standing?"

"Well, let me put it this way: I'm a natural fire extinguisher."

I frown. Judai's acting rather unconcerned now, which is jarring, considering that he had a minor breakdown over it earlier tonight. "Right, you said something along that lines... Sorry for asking."

"No problem, I kind of started the conversation. But I do wonder what this is all about?"

"Well..." Oh Agni, I feel a headache coming up. I couldn't think of a satisfying way to voice my doubts before. Pressed for it now, I still have no idea. "It's complicated..."

"Wow..." Judai states, brows knitted. "You do hit the secretiveness hard."

I sigh and shake my head in resignation. "It's all the same problem, actually. There is that one... _abnormality_ in my life. I didn't choose it, nor can I get rid of it. I have to live with it, for better or worse. It's just... really confusing."

"Abnormality?" The skepticism underlying the words is hard to miss. "You seem normal enough to me. Apart from your looks, I guess, but you can't actually make a secret of them. Unless you can somehow earthbend, there shouldn't be much of a problem, right?"

My heart skips a beat. That one hit too close to home, like _waaaay_ too close. Judai must have noticed the shock, because he continues, "You can't earthbend, right?"

"No, I can't. If I could, I would have done so before." I lean forward and cup my face in my hands, trying to look uncaring. It feels like I'm grasping for straws here, but I'm not actually lying. "My appearance only gets me categorized as a colonial, which is not exactly pleasant either. People can be very judgmental. Even my own parents tell me not to get involved with colonials."

"Whom you obviously didn't listen to."

"They don't understand!" I moan, feeling slighted by the comment. "You see, in my family, I'm the only one who looks foreign, and... I never really told them how much I was hurting. When I ran into Kari, I felt great. She didn't judge me by my looks. But it's really really hard to be around them. They have different views, different mannerisms. And they don't always reconcile with mine."

Dreadful seconds pass, then Judai replies, "I think I get it. You're afraid of treasonous thoughts."

I like smart guys, I really do. But this time, maybe I should have tried for someone whose deductive skills are less developed. Not that there are too many options available, but still...

I shake my head again, refusing to look at Judai. "Actually, you're wrong there. I'm not so much worried about accidentally turning traitor or anything, I'll always do what's best for my country. The thing I'm unsure about is... What exactly _is_ the best for my country?" I take a deep breath. I got this far, now let's get the rest over with as well. "That's the question which scares me. Because a century-long war isn't the obvious answer."

"But a victory in that war is." I finally dare to glance at Judai. He doesn't sound reproachful, or even remotely confused. He seems pretty relaxed, actually, if lost in thought. "You're the educated one here, so correct me if I'm wrong, but as far as I know, most of our iron ore comes from the Earth Kingdom colonies. We get our supplies from there, and in return, they get our knowledge. And the colonies are a better place for it. Isn't it so?"

I can only blink. Maybe he isn't that smart after all. Or, more likely, willfully blind towards all the bloodshed accompanying the whole thing.

"Don't look at me like that," Judai complains, arms crossed. "I'm not naive. I'm suffering, too. But who are you to stop this war? That forest is burning, and everything we can do now is make sure to limit the damage and get the greatest spoils. We have to win. Because we can't afford to lose."

It makes sense, I guess, but it's also kinda tragic. No choice but to go forward and make the best of it.

I lift my feet off the ground and place them on the bed, trying to hide behind my legs. "It sounds so easy when you say it..."

"Then what is your problem?" Judai asks, surprisingly gently this time around. "I know you don't _want_ to be that uncertain, so what's eating you? Do you think there is another way?"

I nod. "The Avatar. He could stop the war, and make it that no one wins or loses."

Judai groans and rubs his temples. "You're not making sense. You know as well as I do that the Avatar is dead. Sure, he'll be reborn, probably is. But a Water Tribe Avatar would be more interested in winning this war rather than flash-freezing it. Just do both of us a favor and put that idea out of your mind. Okay?"

It's not the result I hoped for, but I sense that this is as far as I can carry things without arousing suspicion. "Okay..." I sigh. "Thank you."

"Don't overthink it, you'll just drive yourself crazy," Judai advises, stretching all the while. He's tired, so much is clear.

"I noticed." A yawn is crawling up my throat. I'm tired, too. But... "You're not freaked out by my thoughts?"

"Not more than you. I didn't expect you to bring up the public enemy number one, but else? I can see where you're coming from. Weirdest nighttime conversation I ever had, though." He shakes his head and rubs his eyes. "I think I should try to get some more sleep, nightmares be toasted."

"Good idea," I agree and immediately plop onto the soft mattress. Judai needs to cover some more distance, but flings himself down on his bed with similar zeal.

"Good night, Kami."

"Good night, Ju."

* * *

 **The heat is killing me... But I don't think it's the only reason why this chapter was so hard to write. I feel there is too much dialogue in it, but this is already the toned down version. Plus, there is only so much two characters can do in a bedroom. Well, apart from gymnastics.**

 **Anyway, one Chapter Deluxe, both for the update time and because I really needed to get this stuff out of the way. Hope it wasn't too horrible. (Though it _does_ look better now that the editor is through with it...)  
**


	30. Odd Morning Out

I wake up at dawn. Still half-asleep, I begrudgingly push back the blanket and sit up to get ready for school. I yawn and rub my eyes tiredly, before blinking them open. Wait, my room doesn't look like this...

Argh, turtle whiskers! I'm in Rubona! The rain has ceased and sunlight streams through the open window, illuminating the strange, barely furnished room.

For a second there, unseeing and caught in routine, I thought I was home. Back on Cinder Island. Mum downstairs, making. Either breakfast, or out with dad before he leaves for work. Mimi still sound asleep until I kick him out of bed, when he'd start running around in a panic to get ready for school himself.

I bury my face in my hands. I feel hollow. Hollow and displaced. _This is wrong, all wrong._ But there's nothing I can do about it. There will always be something wrong.

Sighing, I let my hands drop onto the blanket on my knees, absentmindedly glancing sideways. My eyes land on Judai, the boy I'm not sure where to sort into my life. Friend? Random person I'll never see again? Boyfriend material? Loose cannon?

He's fast asleep. For all the claims of rising with the sun, they're a sleepyheaded bunch, those firebenders. Well, not gonna deny Judai his well-deserved rest. After such a night, he really needs it.

I cross my arms behind my head and slump back into the pillow. What Judai said last night doesn't grate on his nerves only. It worries me, too. What if something happened at home? Mimi not getting out of bed without his big sister would be the slightest problem right now. Mum probably didn't get much sleep the past two nights. I wonder if she's lying awake right now, thinking about me, the way I think about her?

I wrinkle my nose in disgust when I ponder the reaction Hirai's family will probably have. I'm sure Mimi would look to his best friend for emotional support, but considering his parents' opinion of me, they're probably wishing me good riddance and hope I'll never come back. The only reason why _they_ never turned me in is that they don't want to explain to their son why the scroll-obsessed girl at Mimi's place is gone. They don't want to hurt Mimi, because that means hurting Hirai.

 _Maybe I should stay away._

The thought horrifies me. I don't know where it came from, but... Isn't it true, in a way? My family would be better off without me. They could finally show their noses in society, without being afraid of getting busted. Be your average Fire Nation family. Maybe have another firebending baby, while I'm off gallivanting around with the Avatar. Maybe get rid of my distinctive Fire Nation speech and settle down in the Earth Kingdom.

Okay, I'm becoming bitter and ridiculous again. As if I'd ever move to the Earth Kingdom. Or keep away from my family. Hirai's parents can think what they want, they did it for the past four years.

It doesn't make it any better, though. I don't feel like lying around any more, I need to do something. So I get up and pad across the straw mats to the slide screen. I wonder if I'm the only one who's awake?

I ease the slide screen open and slip past it into the center area, and I can check Sokka and Toph off my list. Those two aren't going to do anything in the near future. Next stop are Aang and Katara, but they sleep like turtle ducklings as well. Hmm, whatever. I sneak over to the washroom for morning routine. Nothing better to do, and it'll save me the queuing later. Six people on one bathroom is a horrible ratio.

I'm happy to find that the inn is equipped with running water. Humming appreciatively, I open the tap and splash my face with the fresh, cooling liquid. There's even a shelf with washrags and towels, which I make generous use of until I feel halfway presentable. My hair is still a mess, but I suppose I have to live with it for now.

I put the washrag to the side to mark it as used and leave the washroom, only to find that Aang is awake. I wave and mouth a silent _good morning_. The little Avatar returns with a brilliant smile, then gets up to hog the washroom on his own.

I tiptoe back to where I came from and pick up my clothes. I kept my pants and chest wrappings on for the night, so there's only my tunic and surcoat to take care of. And where did Judai hide my hair tie?

Halfway through washing up as I am, I strike out to find a toilet. I take the time to tell Aang about my plan, then put on my shoes and wander down the stairs, along a corridor where I can hear some of the other children get ready for the day (I wonder which room houses Nila?), down another staircase and into the yard of the inn, where I find a lean-to with a couple stalls. They don't smell all that well, but I don't complain. They're clean enough and beat the bushes anytime.

Such luxuries... I wonder how I'll fare with the gang. Camping is nice and all, but to be honest, I don't think I can handle it as a permanent condition. I'm not cut out to be a fugitive.

"What choice do I have?" I sigh for myself, wash my hands under an outdoor faucet and go back inside. On the way, I run into the innkeeper, the female part of the couple I haven't met yet. She's a homely, red-faced woman with black hair and a generous midriff bulge, but her eyes are bright. She seems very friendly, a bit like a teddy gopher bear.

"Good morning," she greets me with a smile, and I smile right back.

"Good morning."

"You're up early," she remarks. "Did you not sleep well? You look tired."

Really? I am? "I'm fine," I reply, still smiling. "But thank you for your concern."

She doesn't seem convinced, and I can't really blame her. I mean, I do feel tired, unsurprisingly. It has been my worst night in months, with my splitting it between comforting Judai and feeling sorry for myself.

The innkeeper purses her lips thoughtfully. "Breakfast isn't ready yet, but how would you feel about a cup of green tea to start the day?"

My first impulse is to refuse. I don't want to be a burden. Plus, Aang is waiting. But a refreshing cup of tea does sound tempting, and I like green tea.

"I'd love a cup," I decide and give a quick bow. "Thank you very much."

The innkeeper smiles again and leads me into the kitchen behind the taproom counter. I feel a bit out of place at first, because staff only and everything, but gradually calm down.

"Can I help with something?"

"Oh no!" the innkeeper laughs. "My husband explodes when I let other people touch his utensils, especially children. Sit down and stop worrying."

"Okay..."

So I sit. While the innkeeper is busy boiling tea, I take a look around the kitchen. The chair I'm sitting in has been squished into a corner, a counter with basins for dish-washing to the left, a wall to the right. A table is nowhere to be found, so the chair appears to be for resting instead of having lunch. There is a huge fireplace in the middle of the room rather than off to the side, walled in by a rectangle of stone counters. A gridiron is hanging from the ceiling above it. Gotta hand it to whoever built this place, that's some barbecue! And it can even be used to make tea!

A cauldron is occupying another corner, and I suppose it can be switched with the grill. It looks kind of heavy, though. Last but not least are the cupboards and shelves filled with any number of things remotely useful in an inn. Dishes, spices, drinks, you name it, I bet you find it. It looks all crowded and chaotic, but clean. In short, it looks like a whole lot of work. I suppose innkeeping is one of these things you need to be passionate about to be able to pull it off for a living.

"What are you thinking about?" my host interrupts my musings, handing me a big mug of tea. I thank her and try taking a sip, but it's too hot. Which means I have no excuse to refrain from making small talk.

"I thought you have an impressive fireplace. It actually seems like more trouble than it's worth. No offense."

"None taken," the innkeeper assures and pours herself a cup of tea as well. She hums contently. "Of course, it's hard work to keep everything clean, especially the grill. But I can't say it's not worth it. The guests enjoy their stay, and it's very rewarding to hear their thanks." With a grin, she adds, "Of course, the coins they leave are very rewarding, too."

"Of course," I chuckle, then another thought hits me. "What about us? We're eating you out of house and home without paying for it. Doesn't it put a serious dent into your earnings?"

"Oh, that's nothing for you to worry about. We'll receive compensation from the army. We need to take good care of our children, after all."

I nod with relief. It reminds me of what I love about the Fire Nation – the social system is only one of the many things guaranteeing your livelihood. Nobody gets left behind.

I deliberately blow at my tea and take another sip. It's still hot, but drinkable hot. I wonder if I should say something else, maybe about my plans for the future. But there is not much to tell. Apart from the fact that I apparently inherited my father's natural-storyteller voice, I'm not sure what to do with my life. Not innkeeping, that much I know now. Maybe I should offer my sympathies to Judai. (Although I suppose he might feel offended by that rather than amused. He seems to find a lot of things funny, but this is about his grandmother's inn.)

"You're shy, aren't you, young lady?"

I furrow my brows behind my mug. I'm in no hurry to put it down, but I have to eventually. My eyes remain glued to the tea though. "I suppose you can call me that..."

"Aw, better leave you alone then, right? Enjoy your tea."

And with that, she's gone. Where to, I wonder. Probably to wherever her husband is, but where's he?

Hmm, none of my business, I guess. I slowly but surely empty the mug, and I can already feel the effects of the theine rush. I place the mug on the counter next to me and get up, making my way back to our room.

My first official act upon entering is jumping in shock, shrieking a "Whoa!" and narrowly dodging a pillow. "What the ashes?!"

"Stray pillow!" Toph's voice cheers somewhere. "Excellent timing, Fireflake!"

The next thing I manage to process is Sokka in front of me, topknot-less in his underwear, face a bit paler than usual. "Hey, you almost slammed the door into me!"

"Sorry, but how would I know you're there?!" I fire right back. "What's going on, anyway?"

"Your boyfriend threw his pillow at me!" Sokka vents. "And when he missed, he threw yours!"

"And a pity that one missed, too," Judai deadpans from his spot on the bed. "Plus, I'm not her boyfriend. And now leave me alone." He belly-flops and pulls the blanket over his head.

I blink once. I blink twice. I turn to Sokka. "What the ashes?" I repeat, puzzled and slightly angered from the lingering shock. "What happened here?"

Sokka rubs his temple with the heel of his hand, seemingly puzzled himself. "Toki said she heard something weird from here, so I came to check and found Judai moving and grunting in his sleep. It was creepy, so I woke him up and now he's acting aggressively like this."

"I'm fine!" the blanket pile calls emphatically. "Stop fussing!"

Sokka lifts his hands helplessly, with a look on his face which unmistakably says, _See? Told you so._

I sigh in resignation and jerk a thumb over my shoulder to indicate the slide screen. "You two get out. I'll handle this."

Sokka nods his understanding. His hand brushes my shoulder in passing, then he takes Toph and the two disappear. I sigh once again and rub my face tiredly. Why me?

I kick off my shoes and pad over to the bed, gathering the pillows in the process. I sit down on the edge next to Judai and gently pull the blanket off his head, revealing the brown mop making up the back of it.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he grumbles into the mattress and blindly reaches for one of the pillows. "Just let me sleep."

I'm inclined to believe him, but that disperses quickly when Judai starts coughing, something he hasn't done since... since he talked to me for the first time. It forces him to his side, and I can see his face glisten in the early morning sunlight. Before I can change my mind, I grab his shoulder and press it down, turning him onto his back. Judai swats at me and I let go, mission accomplished.

This time, I can't blame the sickly appearance on the lighting. Judai looks truly unwell, pale, sweaty, with bloodshot eyes. He quickly closes them and rolls back to his side.

"I'm fine, Kami, really! Let me get some sleep and it'll be alright!"

I doubt that. I feel Judai's forehead and my heart skips a beat. "Ju, you're burning!" How long has he been like this?!

"I'm a firebender."

"My _brother_ is a firebender. I know his body temperature isn't any different from mine, so don't even try. You're _not_ supposed to be burning up like that!"

"So I'm a little feverish," Judai argues petulantly. "What of it? It means I need sleep, so will you kindly get off my case now?"

He does have a point, and I guess it can't be all that dangerous if he's still capable of throwing pillows at Sokka.

"Alright," I concede, albeit reluctantly. "But tell me if anything happens, okay?"

"Got it."

I shake my head, then cup my face in my hands, elbows resting on my knees. Caring about people is surprisingly wearing... I think about Nila, and promptly wonder how many kids are suffering through the aftermath of the stressful escape right now, right at this moment.

* * *

 **After a month, I got a review, and the motivation juices were flowing. I always tell myself not to get too hung up on lacking reviews. People have other stuff to do, and that's perfectly fine. Real Life and such things. I was a bit shocked about myself, how ecstatic I was.**

 **To answer the update question, my dear anon: I just did. XD I update when I deem a chapter fit for the public, which may or may not take a while. The last chapter felt unnatural for a very long time, I re-wrote and edited at every corner. This one, on the other hand, came rather easily. So yeah, update time depends on the chapter. And on the amount of Real Life invading my writing time.**

 **Recently, I've been reminded more and more of the reasons I don't like writing romances. Couple development eats up so much screentime which could be used for such unimportant stuff like... I don't know, _plot?_  
I still love my work, and my two babies, but I'd love it even more if it wasn't so slow. :/  
Oh well, that's how it is. Can't get too hung up on that, either, or I'll never get anywhere. Nobody is perfect, and I'm still working on pacing. And descriptions. That's what I'm here for. :)**

 **Zentauria over and out~**


	31. Girl Trouble

With Judai sleeping, I quickly find myself following Toph and Sokka into the center third of the room. The Water Tribe warrior excuses himself for the washroom, Toph stays. I leave her to do her hair and check on Katara and Aang.

I'm a bit awed when I enter. I should be used to Katara's healing abilities by now, but it's still strange to see that glowing bubble of water flowing across Aang's back, covering that awful scar.

Seeing the two kneeling there on the bed, Katara's face scrunched up in concentration and Aang with a distant look in his eyes, I feel like I'm interfering with something. I beat a silent retreat and sit myself down on the table, already resigned to being stuck with Toph for the time being. I skeptically watch her dressing herself. Her hair looks decent enough, though she doesn't seem to put much effort into it. And of course, she doesn't use one drop of water before putting on her clothes.

"What is it with you and washing?"

Toph freezes in mid-movement, almost dropping her surcoat. I think I shocked her, but she recovers quickly.

"Shouldn't you be watching over your boyfriend instead of spying on a blind girl dressing herself?"

"Well, since I don't have a boyfriend to watch over... No. Plus, you've been running around in your underwear all morning, what more is there to spy?"

Toph blows at a strand of hair in exasperation, which I guess is as close as I can get to an admittance of defeat. I wonder if I should apologize for scaring her, but Toph is so... unpredictable. Well, maybe not unpredictable, but I don't know her well enough to gauge how she would react. What if an apology antagonizes her even more?

I sigh. "Do you want me to go away?"

"Well, since you obviously don't have anyone else to bug, you might as well stay here." Finally done, Toph sits down on the bunk bed. "So, what's up with our friendly pillow launcher?"

"Fever. I suspect his body simply shut down after this whole..." I wave a hand uncomfortably, the word doesn't sit well with me. I end up completely omitting it: "...business."

Toph hums doubtfully and lifts a hand to cup her cheek. "Didn't he say something about an infection last night?"

I forget to breathe for a second. She's right!

However... "Indeed, but then he should have shown some symptoms earlier, right?"

"How would I know?" Toph shrugs. It comes off as somewhat condescending, but not worth getting upset with. Besides, it gives me an idea.

"Maybe you wouldn't know, but Katara would. Do you know when she'll be done with Aang?"

"Nope, but you'll find out."

"I suppose."

We fall back into an increasingly awkward silence. Well, awkward for me, anyway. I don't know what to talk about, and I don't dare asking about Toph's problem with washing again. It's kind of weird, tiptoeing around her like that. Makes me wonder why I'm intimidated by a little blind girl. I suppose 'intimidated' isn't quite the right word. I have no doubts she can hurt me a great deal, but that's not exactly the problem. I don't want her as my enemy, the same way I try to avoid upsetting Sokka. Toph's not as approachable as Katara and Aang are. And yet I'm sitting here now, with her. Might as well try to build something reminiscent of a friendship.

"So... I'm sorry if this sounds weird, but... May I ask what it's like to be blind?"

"I can't see," Toph deadpans in response, as if I had a nut loose somewhere. I groan and roll my eyes.

"Yeah, I'm _just_ smart enough to establish that. I mean, what is it like? Do you see, like, black or anything? Like when I close my eyes?"

Toph sighs. "Repeat that for me, will you, Fireflake?"

Er, what? "Do you see... Oh..." Okay, okay, okay... "My mind is twisting itself into knots right now. I suppose you don't even know what black is?"

"Can't say I do," Toph shrugs again. "I don't see anything, Birdie. You seeing people don't understand, so don't break your brain over it."

Of course I try to understand anyway, because that's what my brain does if I don't keep an eye on it. Pondering Toph's words, I realize they do sound absurd at first glance... but actually aren't all that intangible. "I think I do understand."

That catches Toph off-guard. She looks up, surprised and maybe kind of... happy. "Really?"

I nod and purse my lips, sorting through my thoughts. Now that I claimed understanding, I don't want to disappoint. "In a way. It's like the things behind my back, I guess. They're not covered in blackness, it's just... I just _don't see_ them." I'm almost bubbling over with pride. I feel like I just found enlightenment. "That's so fascinating!"

"Fascinating?" Toph shakes her head in disbelief. "Gotta hand you that, Fireflake: That's a first."

"What do you mean?" I knit my brows, about as weirded out as her. "You've never been asked what being blind is like?"

She shakes her head again, shoulders sagging. "Not like this, no. People don't try to understand. They're too busy trying to take care of me like I was helpless."

I tilt my head curiously. "Huh? That's... I can think of a gazillion words to describe you, but _helpless_ is certainly not one of them. I'd go for butt-kicking awesome."

Toph laughs softly. As in _softly_. Holy smoke, this is one for the scrolls! "Thanks, Kamina."

"Please, just call me Kami." I shake my head, this new Toph is starting to spook me. "Or Fireflake, as usual. I don't trust this tame...ness."

Toph laughs again, loud this time. I never knew that being laughed at can be that relaxing. "You've got yourself a deal, Fireflake!"

I smile tiredly. I pulled through a successful conversation with this difficult girl, now I want to go right back to sleep for recharging. Socializing can be _so_ exhausting...

"I think I'll take another nap," I announce and get up from the table. "Would you send Katara to get me when she's done?"

Toph crosses her arms. "You're as bad as Snoozles. Maybe I should call you Sleepyflake."

"Be my guest," I tell her indifferently, not bothering to ask who Snoozles is. Judai, maybe Sokka. Sleepyflake rings awful, but I can't deny the truth in it. Not too eager to deny it, either. I'm more interested in studying the back of my eyelids just about now, so I leave Toph alone and sneak into bed next to an out-like-a-stone Judai. Only that the theine rushing through my veins keeps me from drifting off. Which is just as well, because it doesn't take long for Katara to poke her head in.

I glance at Judai, then back at Katara. I shrug, signaling that I don't know whether I should wake him or not for her to check on him, but she shakes her head and waves me over. I knit my brows skeptically, but I get up.

"What is it?" I ask the very moment the screen slides shut, still puzzled.

"I want to look after your back."

"My back?" I repeat with narrowed eyes, remembering the scene on Appa two days ago. _Her chi is all twisted up, it can't be just the fall._ Then I force myself to relax. It's some weird water treatment, not an interrogation. Besides, I can't deny that stupid fall, and that I could probably use another healing session. "Okay."

Judging from the look on Katara's face, the wariness didn't escape her. It seems to sadden her to a degree, but she quickly schools her features, even smiles. She turns around and I follow her to her and Aang's part of the room, where the little Avatar is donning his uniform. I can't help thinking he stole it, school uniforms are wickedly expensive. I'm not sure what to feel about the fact though.

"You're lucky my school is so unknown. If you ran around in a, say, Caldera Academy uniform, you'd be recognized _everywhere_."

Aang pauses and chuckles awkwardly. Guiltily. "Yeah... We're lucky you didn't wear it when you joined. The two of us wearing the same clothes would have looked off."

Not exactly. The thought is so unbelievably strange, but... "We could have passed as twins. Nobody would have looked closer."

"Twins?" Aang asks, apparently finding the idea as bizarre as I do. That it's true just makes it worse – granted, I'm taller than Aang and have broader shoulders, but the latter isn't much of a feat anyway and the difference isn't that great. Else... Well, there is no denying our common heritage. We're both wiry, with limbs foreign to brawn, agility in our bloodstreams. As far as I can tell, I'm a shade lighter in eye and skin color, while Aang beats me in hair. But it's all subtle enough to blame it on being unidentical.

I want to bash my head against the wall. Ten times, one hit per letter: A-V-A-T-A-R-T-W-I-N. Someone else? I could use a buddy to make me look less like a madwoman.

I resist the urge and take off my surcoat and tunic instead. Aang leaves to give me the privacy I need for unwrapping my chest, then ask Katara what she wants me to do. She says I should do what I'm most comfortable with, so I end up lying on my stomach in Katara's bed.

It's all cool, I guess. The waterbender does her thing without talking too much. She wants to know from time to time how I'm feeling, if anything hurts, but there's nothing to complain about. There is the occasional popping sensation, but it never goes beyond uncomfortable and I quickly get used to it, to the point that I become drowsy from the feeling. I almost miss out on Sokka leaving the washroom, and not quite as almost miss out on the fact that I'm half naked, _completely failing to care_. It only sinks in when Katara takes a break, and my face promptly starts to burn. I feel the need to cover myself immediately, even though Sokka is long gone.

"He... only saw my back, right?"

But Katara only chuckles at my awkwardness. "He didn't see anything, he was too focused on leaving."

"Oh, good," I sigh with relief and roll over to sit up, then wrap myself into a blanket. Just in case. "So, what are you doing to my back, anyway? There aren't any wounds."

Katara closes her eyes, apparently resigning. Or maybe it's irritation, the deep breath she heaves afterwards might indicate that instead. "I'm straightening out your energy flow. Your ribs are damaged in a lot of places, I can sense many old bruises."

She can sense them? Does that mean they're still... there?

I shrink a bit further into the blanket, wondering if I should answer her unspoken question. I decide to take the leap of faith. "I was beaten at school, and I hid it as far as I could. Never thought of long-term consequences." My heart is pounding, both from the confession and the dreadful news. I draw in a long breath to calm myself. "Is it really that bad?"

"You can move normally, that's always a good sign," Katara says with a placating smile. "And your airbending balances out potential breathing difficulties, which I don't think you have anyway. You're lucky."

Lucky, huh? Not the word I would have used, but apparently, I don't need to worry. "So my ribs are fine?"

"Your ribs are fine," Katara assures, then adds in a serious tone, "But you need to rest after an injury and give your body time to heal properly. Okay?"

"Okay..." I sigh. "Does that mean we're done?" I want to put my clothes back on.

Katara purses her lips thoughtfully. "We're done for now. But you should take it easy, or you might block your chi again."

"Got it."

I carefully slip out of bed. For a moment, I feel dizzy and almost kick over the bucket of water Katara used, but it fades quickly. I feel... different. Lighter. Like I can breathe freer, think clearer. I want to bend something. Frisky as I am, I turn to the local window and throw a punch into the general direction. The resulting gust of wind is stronger than expected, the shutters tear open and, swinging violently on their hinges, crash into the brick wall of the house with a loud _Thwack!_

For a moment, I just stand there, dumbstruck. Then I manage to pull myself together and turn to face Katara with a sheepish grin. "Uh... Whoopsy?"

But before she can comment, the slide screen is ripped open and a ballistic big brother appears, eyes darting around frantically. "What was that?!"

"Relax, Sokka, it was just the window," Katara calms him down, while a curious Avatar-face peeks over Sokka's shoulder, only to blush a furious crimson. Which is when I realize that I'm still topless and immediately perform damage control, covering my chest with my arms and spinning around on my heel, face overheating with embarrassment.

"Get out!" I yell at the boys behind me, and I can hear Sokka sputter an apology before the slide screen audibly slams shut.

A few seconds trickle away before I manage to find my composure and go pick up my clothes.

"That... never happened," I tell Katara, and the waterbender nods. She tries to look solemn, but there is obvious mirth shining in her eyes. I huff, and the amusement takes over the rest of her face.

"Alright," she states with a wink. "I pretend that I need to tell you not to blast anyone until your chi flow normalizes, because you haven't found out yet."

Well... I guess that settles it. Nothing noteworthy has ever occurred in this room. "How long will that take?"

"That's up to you."

Okay, I get it. I close my eyes and take a couple deep breaths until the light feeling subsides. Only a tiny part of it remains, but I can totally get used to that. Who knew what some waterbending can do to a battered rib cage? Also, I'm grateful that Katara didn't jump at the beatings, not everyone would have been deterred by my obvious uneasiness.

I finally dress myself, and I realize how hungry I am. I need breakfast. And I need it _now_.

Unfortunately, patience is on. Katara already had her trip to the washroom, it seems, only her hair is still loose. But Judai... "Um, Katara?"

"Hmm?"

I scratch my cheek, feeling self-conscious. "Sorry to drop this on you, but would you check on Judai as well? If he doesn't lash out again, that is."

"Of course," she replies, but I think I detected a slight hesitation and steer my gaze at my toes. This is all quite a responsibility to load upon her.

"I'm sorry," I repeat, pressing the words through gritted teeth. It's only now I realize how much I'm already depending on Katara for things which could be done without burdening her. "None of this is actually your problem. You've done so much already, I shouldn't bother you with this."

"Don't say that," comes the gentle response, and I look up to find Katara getting up from the bed and smoothing out her skirt. She smiles encouragingly. "You're not bothering me with anything. I'm happy to help."

"You're too kind."

Katara's expression becomes serious, I'm not sure if she agrees with me or not. I don't think so. "Come on, let's see what the others are up to."

And thus, we go to join the rest of the gang in the center third. Sokka starts whistling uncomfortably right away, Aang goes pink and Toph cackles like a fox hyena. I glare at her and grumble determinedly, "None of this has happened. Ever."

"Sure thing, Fireflake!"

Needless to say that Toph's tone indicates the direct opposite. I scowl some more when out of nowhere, a new voice pipes up, the words slurred from fatigue: "What's going on? Can't a guy get some sleep around here?"

* * *

 **Yup, still alive, and a (hopefully) more humorous chapter in the luggage.**

 **A couple weeks ago, I had a light bulb moment and noticed that the issue of slavery actually is brushed upon in ATLA, in the non-labor camp sort of way. As early as episode 9, Sokka remarks on how Aang, as the Avatar, would fetch a much greater price on the black market than the titular waterbending scroll ever will. If that's not an allusion to slavery, then I don't know what is.**

 **As for the guest reviews:**

 **SandwichGoddess: In case you ever get as far as this... No, I didn't. In fact, I considered changing the name after I realized its meaning. I kind of have it with names starting with Ka-, it just rolls off the tongue and sounds lovely. I also have a penchant for names with four letters, and purposefully added the -na to break that habit. (Yup, Kami's original name was, in fact, Kami. But it's even better as a nickname, I think.) So Kami happens to be the Japanese word for god (or paper, or hair...), but that was completely irrelevant to the creating process.**

 **Guest from June 29th: I'm just getting that blissful Clawhauser donut smile. In case you don't know Zootopia, let me tell you: It really is blissful. Reviews like yours make me smile so hard, because it adresses the things I have the most doubts about. The fact alone that Kami is an airbender pushes her dangerously close to Sue territory, so I'm walking a razor's edge here which can tip with every new chapter. Then there is the danger of Wangst, of course, and the hope that Kami/Judai interactions can keep up with the Gaang. Stories which are purely OC-centric often drop off the radar. (Which is a shame, there are some real pearls out there.)**

 **Thank you both! And peace out!**


	32. Coughbending

"You're awake!" is the first thing I can think of, and Judai promptly yawns.

"Not too sure about that..." he drawls and leans back, but he doesn't get the chance to hit the wall – his hand shoots up and he falls into a coughing fit. "Oh, turtle whiskers..."

"How are you feeling?" Katara asks before I can, the awkwardness from before all but forgotten.

"Apart from beyond frazzled, you mean? Just fine." Judai finally relaxes against the wall and crosses his arms. I really doubt the last statement, but I'm not permitted to dwell on it as Judai continues, "But what was that bang?"

The question turns eyes into the general direction of Katara and me, and my nerves bid their farewell. The others don't know what it was either, but I can't explain it to them _now_. What can I say instead?!

"Everything's okay," Katara replies easily, and I slowly release the breath I've been holding. "It was just a gust of wind slamming the window shutters."

"I see."

I send a silent _thank you_ Katara's way, relief washing over me like a wave. _Thank you, thank you!_

Of course, Aang, Toph and Sokka know better, judging from their faces. The former have smirks plastered across their faces, Toph more so than Aang, while Sokka raises an eyebrow. I grin sheepishly, giving wordless confirmation, and when I turn back at Judai afterwards, he seems curious. But he doesn't comment on the silent exchange.

"Anyway," he begins instead, "I might as well stay up now. Is there something I should know?"

I look at everyone, then shrug. "Not really, no sudden enlightenment situations or other earth-shattering developments during the last thirty, forty minutes. And you? Can someone check on you _now_ without risking collisions with airborne bedding?"

"Can I talk to you without risking collisions with that way of speaking?" Judai responds with a meaningful roll of his eyes, then pushes himself off the wall. "But fine. This is about Kari's water magic, right?"

Now it's Katara's turn to roll her eyes, while Sokka snickers. "It's not magic, it's waterbending," he says in a jokingly know-it-all manner. "It's an ancient art unique to Water Tribe culture, with three different styles and several application possibilities such as fighting, healing, and making snowmen."

I'm too busy gaping at Sokka to see how the rest reacts, though I can hear Toph laugh. The one to sum up my feelings is Judai however, with a dumbfounded "What...?" ringing out after a few seconds. Sokka keeps grinning, and I keep wondering where that speech was warranted.

"Right," Katara's irritated voice cuts through the astonishment and she purposefully strides over to Judai. "Lie down, please. Kuzon, please bring the water."

"Oh, sure!" Aang calls right back and dashes off to fetch the bucket while Katara and Judai choose the opposite direction. My feet itch to follow because... mommy turtle duckiness. Urgh, I can't...

Aang comes back with the water, and I tell myself to stop worrying. It'll be fine, Katara knows what she's doing and keeps proving it.

I end up borrowing Katara's abandoned comb to distract myself. I wonder what it's made of, since it doesn't feel like metal or wood. So I ask Sokka about it, cursing my curiosity all the while because I'm sure I'll regret it. The Water Tribe warrior says that I'm dealing with a whale tooth comb here, and while I don't feel the need to throw it across the room, I'm kinda grossed out by the idea to have something like that make contact with my hair. I wish I had my brass comb. Alas, it's sitting on my dresser at home, and it sits there snugly, without any intention to come flying in the near future.

I place Katara's comb on the table, then reach back for braiding when I remember that my hair tie is still missing, and I can't ask Judai where he put it right now. So I leave it and redirect my attention at the rest of the group. Not that there is anything interesting to see – Toph is relaxing on the bed while Sokka and Aang play earth-fire-water-air. I spontaneously decide to join them, and we quickly run into a little situation when the two boys use earth and I use fire, because Sokka whoops in triumph and leaves me with a raised brow.

"Is a draw that cheerworthy?"

"What are you talking about? Earth beats fire, so we win!"

"Since when does earth beat fire? Water beats fire, and earth beats water."

"Huh?" is Aang's final comment before we go on clearing up the confusion. Apparently, Aang and Sokka play with the rule that one element beats the next in the Avatar cycle where the rules I know are based in science: Fire burns air, air erodes earth, earth soaks up water, water douses fire. What does that tell us about the status of the Avatar in different parts of the world?

We keep playing along the Avatar cycle rule when I hear a yelp from the neighboring room and leap to my feet. My two playmates look up as well, but they don't seem particularly concerned. Not in a way which goes beyond the normal sympathy level. It's reassuring enough to keep me from running off and see what happened, but I'm still nervous when I settle on the straw mats again.

"Don't worry about Judai," Aang tells me with a comforting smile. "He's in good hands."

"I know..." I mumble in response. "I'm just..." I huff in frustration. Waiting can be truly horrible.

"Oh, come on, Fireflake!" Toph decides to cut in, brutal as ever. "Your Prince Pillow toughed out a lot more than Sweetness' ministrations, he's not going to bite it _now_."

I grind my teeth, but I can't think of a proper retort. I don't need one. Toph's talent of being infuriating and soothing at the same time is very unique, and there's nothing to add.

"I guess so..." I concede when suddenly the slide screen opens, admitting Katara. The solemn look on her face has it all come crashing down again and I stand up.

"What's going on?"

She perks up, the gloom disappears and is replaced by an assuring smile. "He's healing well, and the coughing is just a little cold." Then the smile fades and makes room for the broodiness again. "There's just..."

"Go on, tell them!" Judai's bitter voice calls from the other side of the slide screen. "It's not like it's going to hurt anyone."

Katara sighs in resignation, then raises her voice so everyone can hear: "Judai is a firebender."

Well, do tell.

"He is?" Toph asks and when I spare her a glance, I notice that the news even convinced her to bother with sitting up.

"Yes," Katara states firmly, though I think I can detect a hint of concern. "But..." Yup, that's concern, definitely.

"It's blocked?" I suggest, helping her along. What's the problem with saying it?

To my surprise, Katara's next words are "No. The chi paths are muddled and out of balance, not blocked. I can't tell what it means, but I think it's something he needs to work out for himself."

Out of balance, huh? Is that it? An issue of the mind rather than the body?

I push past Katara and chance a look – Judai is sitting on the bed, knees up, arms crossed on top of them, and scowls at nothing in particular. It makes my heart ache.

Following a sudden impulse, I pick up Katara's comb again and make my way over to the bed to hold it in front of Judai's nose. My friend recoils and blinks dazedly, but then he regains his focus and looks up warily. I try to smile.

"Here. You look like you could use something to do."

"Thanks," comes the listless response and I drop the comb into Judai's outstretched hand. He starts raking the teeth through the hopeless mess which could be mistaken for his hair and promptly winces from the twinge. The upside: It snaps him out of whatever depression he's in.

"You'll be okay?" I ask softly, causing a sigh on Judai's part.

"Yeah..." he says at length, fiddling around with the comb. "I'll be fine. Kari managed to drag up some unpleasantries I prefer not to think about, but I'll get over it."

"Did she ask odd questions?" I demand to know, disbelief throwing me for a loop. That doesn't sound like Katara!

"No!" Judai quickly denies and I calm down. "She only tried to fix my bending, but somehow caused a flashback instead. I don't know, it's all weird."

"I see... Is that why you screamed?"

Judai nods, once again busy fidgeting with the comb. "It was pretty painful. But at least I have an idea what's wrong now." Then he looks up again, eyes narrowed. "Would you sit down, please?" he half pleads, half commands. "You just standing there makes me edgy."

"Why?" I ask, peeved by the tone, but sitting down anyway. Judai pauses his worrying the comb for a moment.

"It reminds me of that earthbender, Guo Ping. It was his favorite intimidation tactic."

The words bring up some nasty memories of my first meeting with the slavers, of crying on the ground, feet fixed in place. Even in hindsight the scene doesn't lose its terror. "I know what you mean. I'm amazed you picked up his name, though. You have quite a memory."

"I get that a lot," Judai shrugs, breaks off for a cough, then goes on, "Memory training is kind of in the job description, for better or worse."

Before I can come up with an adequate response, there is a "Kamina, Judai?" and I turn around to spot Katara. "We're heading downstairs for breakfast," she informs us and I share a befuddled look with Judai.

"Uh, sure. We'll catch up later."

"Or now," Judai declares, drops the comb onto the nightstand and bounces out of bed to throw on his robe all sloppy but speedy. By the time the rest of the gang has filed into the room, Judai can pass for 'good to go', and that's awesome. Breakfast awaits us, and I'm _hungry!_

* * *

The taproom is not quite as full as expected. We're obviously late, there are various foodstuffs spread out on the counter as a buffet, and a lot of them have been taken already. The innkeepers are nowhere to be found, but I don't care. I know it's impolite, but I grab a skewer anyway, with some meat and vegetables for my grumbling stomach. Sokka does the same, and we both get a rebuke from Katara for it. Then Toph steps up and Sokka hands her another skewer, showing Katara just how many figs we give. Judai is the next one to shrug and pick up a bun, leaving only an exasperated Katara and an uncertain Aang foodless.

"Come on, sis! We don't need to pay for it anyway."

"I still agree we should wait though," Judai says and takes another bite out of his bun, earning himself a couple funny glances. He remains unperturbed and adds, "And yes, I'm aware what this looks like."

"Rules are meant to be broken, Sweetness."

Katara groans, one hand on her hip, the other glued to her forehead. She's caving.

"Er..." Aang cautiously takes the word, "Maybe we should look for a table..."

Always the peacemaker, our little Avatar. I take a look around, then Sokka points at an unoccupied corner table and we weave our way towards it.

"Can you find Nila?" Judai asks me halfway, eyes roaming over the place. I follow his example, but I can't see her either.

"I guess she's in her room, wherever that might be. Speaking of which, do you know where Maila and Li Yu are?"

"They stayed with Kiran's family." Oh, okay. "I bet they get to sleep in."

"Well, and we get that awesome buffet, so stop complaining."

Judai sticks out his tongue. "I complain as much as I want."

Aang, who listened in on us, wants to know who Nila is, so I explain and then offer one of the grilled tomato carrots in my skewer. Katara can starve if she wants it so badly, but I don't want Aang to get himself involved because of his all too obvious crush. The little Avatar hesitates, but his stomach wins in the end. I watch him chew on the vegetable, and I can't help a content smile. A shame that Judai chooses this very moment to burst into yet another coughing fit and get all vexed over it.

"Bah! Colds should be banned!"

"That's why people generally use blankets," I deadpan, eyebrow raised. "You know, to keep themselves _warm_ during the night?"

The death glare I receive is a very definite answer, and I lift my hands in a _just saying_ gesture. "Come on, it's not the end of the world."

"Not for you, maybe."

"Ooh!" I cry dramatically and fan with my hand as if burned. "Miles out, miles out! If there's something you don't want to bear witness to, it's me with a cold."

Aang spontaneously chokes on a bite of bell pepper. "Yeah, I second that," he says and we share a look of commiseration. Great to have someone who understands, because seriously, airbender colds are _not pleasant._

"Third!" Sokka's cheerful voice rises, reminding me that there are still other people around. We reached the table while engrossed in our three-way conversation, so Aang returns the skewer with the leftover meat to me and plops into the seat next to Katara. Judai snatches the chair on the other side of the little Avatar, and I end up with Toph again. But that's okay. I can live with that.

* * *

 **They need frozen wood frogs in the Fire Nation. Their unthawed form is apparently very tasty, haha! :D**

 **But alas, they have an equatorial climate. Nothing freezes there. (Imagine what Zuko must have thought when Aang lost all the frogs and whined "Nooo! My friends need to suck on those froooogs!")**

 **The year has 52 weeks, by the way. Fascinating how Zutara Week and Kataang Week coincide anyway. Maybe I'm a little pessimistic, but I already see the shipping war inflaming again. I've come across a great Zutara fic a couple months ago, but I was unable to read beyond chapter three because the writer's anti-Kataang A/Ns are very... _passionate_. Not saying that there aren't any obsessive Kataangers, but... No. Just no.**

 **That's why I'm always very happy to welcome Zutarians here. I want to write the characters as close to canon as possible, which means the Kataanginess is unavoidable. So to every Zutarian who got this far and didn't run screaming: Applause to you, you're keeping my faith in humanity alive! Please, go on! :)**

 **Let us all ship together in peace!**


	33. So this is it?

When the innkeeper/bartender shows up, we exchange our coins for plates, chopsticks and mugs, and we can finally storm the buffet without Katara breathing down everybody's necks. There's not much conversation, it's mostly Sokka trying to keep the mood up by bantering with Katara, in that teasing way siblings use to affirm their love for each other. And while Toph joins in the teasing one way or another and even Aang makes the occasional remark, I notice that Judai keeps completely silent. Doesn't eat much either, only pushes his sausages around with his chopsticks, mind all over the place. It's a little distracting and I'm about to ask if he's okay, but Aang beats me to it. Judai takes a moment to piece his scatterbrain back together, then wards off the question with an "I'm fine." It's obvious that Aang doesn't believe it (and neither do I), but he refrains from probing any further.

"How come you're a vegetarian, by the way?" Judai asks instead. Quite randomly, I might add.

Aang's taken aback as well, but then readily explains that he doesn't want any lives to be taken for his lunch. It's kind of fitting. Then Sokka gets himself mixed up in the conversation, setting an all-out dispute into motion.

I sit quietly and smile to myself, watching the boys debating the benefits of meat and vegetarianism is rather amusing. Also, Sokka is astoundingly knowledgeable for a Water Tribe member, spouting health facts all over. Though I suspect he's overdoing it. If meat were _that_ good and vegetarianism _that_ bad, Toph must be big and bulky while Aang must be rattling while walking. Oh spirits, those images!

I can't keep myself from snorting, unintentionally interrupting the discussion. I get some sidelong glances, but I don't care and get up instead. "I think I'll go for another skewer. Your fascinating debate has a way of increasing my appetite."

"Can you bring some for me too?" Sokka asks and I nod with a grin.

"You know what, I'll load my plate and everybody can grab one when I come back."

Sokka gives a thumbs-up and I walk over to the buffet, where I find that the innkeepers put up some vegetarian skewers as well. I hum happily while picking two of them up. Aang's gonna love this!

I turn around and nearly knock Nila over the head with my plate. She squeaks in shock and I hastily apologize.

"Nila!" Judai calls across the room and we girls turn around. He's halfway upright.

"It's okay, Judai!" Nila yells back. "You can stay where you are!"

He nods and falls back into his seat while Nila closes her eyes with a deep sigh. She's tired, and my big sister instincts kick in.

"What's going on?"

"Judai's being overprotective," Nila answers, and I raise my brows. She misinterpreted the question deliberately, that's for sure.

"Yeah, I guess it's one of his hobbies. I can't blame him, though." I place my full plate on the counter. With a heavy sigh, I lean forward and pull Nila into a quick embrace. She gives vent to a small sniff and steps back, wiping her eyes. Then she manages to compose herself and looks up with new determination. "One of my roommates fell sick. I'm here to fetch some tea."

"That's really thoughtful of you." A lot more thoughtful than me anyway. I had tea in my hands this morning and I didn't think of bringing some for Judai. A maybe-eleven-year-old beats me in social skills. Why am I not surprised?

The innkeeper, who noticed our little exchange, is already on the spot with a big mug of tea. "Here, take this to your friend. But be so kind and try not to spill any, okay?"

Nila turns to pick up the mug and bows. "Of course. Thank you very much."

"No problem," the man smiles and makes a shooing motion with his hand. "Now go."

Nila bows again, and then she's gone. I take my plate and return to my own place. Judai is quick to ask what happened, and I shrug.

"Looks like you're not the only one who woke up in a fever this morning. She wanted tea for a roommate."

"She's amazing, isn't she? Always caring for everyone, even when she's close to breaking down herself. To think she hasn't even hit her teens yet..." He drops his chopsticks, only to cup his face in the freed hand. The other, in a terrible breach of etiquette, is underneath the table. "I wish my sister would be this mature..."

"You have a sister?"

Judai flinches, sitting up straighter and banging his palm onto the tabletop. "I didn't say that."

What the...?

"Yes, you did," Toph comes with the honesty mace, and I feel a sudden urge to smack her. Even a blind girl should be able to read the signs! "You said you want your sister to be as mature as that Nila girl."

"Well, I meant that I want a sister like Nila!"

I pray to the High Dragons for some relief of the tension. The whole table has fallen silent. Judai is glowering at Toph, an explosion waiting to happen. Toph remains relaxed, doesn't even seem to realize what she's doing. Please, please, don't let her call him out on the lie! I can't deny I'm curious myself, but that doesn't mean I approve of driving people over the edge.

Then Toph shrugs. "Whatever you say, Featherdragon."

Judai huffs and grabs himself a skewer with a little too much vigor. But I feel like I can breathe again. Disaster successfully averted. Judai strikes me as a generally soft fellow, but he's a firebender alright. Which apparently is the exact same thing that went through Toph's head. I mean, are we done with the nicknames yet? Featherdragon sounds like something to settle on, I really can't decide whether I find it ridiculous or awesome.

An awkward silence follows, during which everyone picks up a skewer, presumably so they're not the first one to make a sound. I know that's definitely the case with me. But hey, if anything good came from the whole near-calamity, it's the fact that Judai is _eating_. Plus, I doubt Sokka is going to shut up for long.

But as it turns out, there is no need for the Water Tribe warrior to crack a joke. While everyone's still indulging in highly concentrated face-stuffing, Guard Li shows up and calls out for a certain Shiko from Pon Kwo, and a girl three tables away answers. They have a conversation I can't hear from my seat, but when they're done, the girl instantly runs off, leaving the inn as if stung by a lion adder.

"What was that?" Judai asks, and I'm glad to find that there is no trace of anger left in his voice.

"I think her parents came to pick her up," Sokka suggests.

"Probably..." Judai murmurs, brows furrowed. Here we go again...

"What are you thinking about?"

"Just calculating... Pon Kwo should be a one hour ride on an ostrich horse, or half an hour by ferry. Kalai is about three times the distance, so..." He trails off and leans back, arms crossed. Of course. He wants to be home.

My throat goes dry. An hour from now, Judai will be gone. It feels so unreal, and yet the mere prospect kills me a little on the inside. I don't want him to be gone, I don't want to be stuck with technical enemies again. I pick up my mug, take a huge gulp. Useless, still sandpaper.

"I'll miss you," I whisper, eyes fixed on my tea. It's so green and... _deep_.

"I'll miss you, too. But chin up, the final chapter is yet to be written, right?"

Taken aback by Judai's upbeat tone, I find myself looking right into a pair of light gray eyes which are glinting with enthusiasm. It's too much, I need to turn away. There is a short pause, then I can hear Aang say, "It's not your fault, Kamina's just bad at keeping eye contact."

"Nothing personal," I mumble confirmation and take another sip of my tea. Blast it, how many times did I send the wrong signals already?! "Really need to work on this..."

"It's okay," Judai says. "I was just worried is all. It's not the first time and I was afraid that... you know..."

I look up, waving the matter aside. "No, you're not making me uncomfortable. So, uh... You were saying?"

"Right, I was saying you should come visit." And now he's grinning again, beaming at everyone around. "You'll get lifesaver discount."

"Lifesaver discount?" Aang repeats quizzically, looking a little lopsided with one brow up and one brow down. Judai gives him pretty much the same look in return and I clench my teeth, trying hard not to laugh at the boys.

"They don't know yet, Master Innkeeper-In-Training. You never told them."

"An innkeeper, huh?" Sokka pipes up, rubbing his hands with delight. "Do you think you can teach Kari some of these delicious Fire Nation recipes?"

Katara raises her brows at her brother, causing Judai to chuckle awkwardly. "I'd rather leave that to Kami, I guess."

"Of course," I scoff. "Because I'm stuck with that meathead, as opposed to you."

"Well, at least you get to travel around. I mean, I would love to..."

"Judai from Kalai."

Already?! I turn my gaze at Guard Li, some selfish part of me hoping I misheard. But Judai jumps, he's heard the call, too.

"Here!" he hollers, almost crackling with joy. He bids his goodbye with an excited "Catch ya later!" and rushes off. I watch him talk to Guard Li, then he disappears out the door of the inn.

"Now that's what I call a dynamic exit," Sokka notes. Can't claim to disagree here, though my amusement is limited. I keep nibbling on my skewer, the food suddenly tastes bland. It's not like I didn't know this was coming, but... it's too early. I'm still confused. There is too much that still feels unfinished. Guess I need to figure it out for myself.

While the gang slowly eats up and drops breakfast in favor of talking, I watch the inn emptying. More and more kids are being picked up by Guard Li and occasionally Hina. Sometimes, they have to go directly into the rooms, and I see Nila again, accompanying a girl who sways more than she walks. She's covered in bruises, and Guard Li apparently orders Nila to hang back. She shakes her head vehemently, but in the end, she stays in the taproom while Guard Li leaves with the other girl. I wave her over and drag Judai's abandoned plate away. Half of his skewer is still there, but I'm not entirely sure what to do with it.

Nila immediately asks where Judai is, and I wordlessly point at the inn door. Sokka waves the question aside and says he'll be back, which is probably accurate. But in the meantime, Nila can eat with us.

"How was the night?" I ask. "You look tired."

"I am tired," the girl sighs. "But so are you. I don't believe anyone slept well." Sokka inhales to protest, but Nila forestalls him: "Except for your friends, maybe."

I nod sagely. "Slept like turtle ducklings, those four. Judai and me, on the other hand... Well."

"Did you at least talk to him?" Sokka wants to know, causing me to run a hand through my hair.

"I did. Not exactly what I had in mind, though."

"What is it?" Nila asks. "Maybe I can help."

The first thing springing to mind is _It's grown-up stuff, you wouldn't understand._ Then I realize that Nila is Toph's age. A bit younger perhaps, but not by much. I take a deep breath.

"What do you think would be better – winning the war in the future at the cost of more lives, or stopping it right now, neither winning nor losing?"

Nila tilts her head, looking at me weirdly. "Are you kidding me? You didn't discuss _that_ , did you?"

I shrug and send the rest of the gang a quick I-rest-my-case look before turning back at Nila. "Yeah, thought so. Judai also said I don't make sense."

"Why would you even _ask_ such a question?"

"Why indeed..." A pointed look at Aang, who quirks a brow. Then back at Nila. "Funny story, really. So, what do you say? Hypothetically."

Nila shakes her head. "I don't want to think about it. It cuts both ways. Sure, I want my dad back as soon as possible, but it's too late for a truce to work out. If we don't win..." She shudders. "I just escaped Earth Kingdom clutches. I don't want to go back."

Aang next to Nila looks like he's going to bite off his lower lip. The Water Tribe siblings wear somber expressions, Toph's is closer to 'dour'. Even they can't stop the sympathy.

Yup, welcome to my life, folks...

* * *

 **Three weeks since the last update... I had a nice summer vacation, though. To think I started this fic on a winter vacation... Time does fly.**

 **Guest review time! Only one this time, by a guest with the very relatable name "DragonLover151". Well, relatable for me, anyway. Dragons are awesome! Can't wait for the next season of Race to the Edge. It's scheduled for release in a couple days! *.***

 **Aaaanyway... To DragonLover (in case you get to read this,** **I see the overflowing love for Judai here** **and imagine you getting bored), and pretty much everybody else: I agree that Kaminaang is a lovely ship, and I'd totally pull it off if Aang weren't katarasexual. Sometimes, I think to myself, "You know Zen, you want to try writing a Zutara fic anyway. Why not use Kaminaang as a side pairing?" Well, because most probably, I'll never get around writing it. I returned home with fresh ideas, even for crack fics, but I find Zuko and Katara exceptionally hard to write together. However, if there's a Zutarian out there who also thinks Kami and Aang would make a good couple, you're welcome to try. I'd love to read something like that!**


	34. Master Schedule

We're sitting around the table in our room, thoroughly stuffed, minus one Judai. I found my hair tie beneath the bed (however it got there), so while Sokka is presenting a crazy-long scroll he calls his 'Master Schedule' and reveals it to be what he's been working on last night, I braid my hair. About time that I get those strands out of my face.

"I calculated how much distance we cover on average, and we really need to pick up the pace if we want to make it to the Black Cliffs in time."

"The Black Cliffs?" I repeat uncertainly. The Black Cliffs are a thinly populated coastal area with a couple uninhabited islands in the middle of the Fire Nation. I don't know that much about them, but I don't think it's a good place. Volcanic activity and a shortage of freshwater don't make for desirable living conditions. "You want to hide _there_? Not a good idea. I mean, sure, nobody lives there who could find us. But people don't live there _for a reason_."

"We won't be there for long," Sokka explains. "According to my schedule, we'll be hard pressed to get a few hours rest."

"Rest for what?"

I'd like to say I do well in the ensuing staring contest, but... Har har.

"Okay, I get it. Secret anti-Fire Nation stuff. Thanks for the reminder."

Better get back to braiding my hair. I gnash my teeth, my chest aches. There is so much hatred, nothing else to call it. Hatred towards my situation, the utter powerlessness. Not even the bars of the slave cell made me feel this much like a prisoner.

At least now I know where we're going. It's not exactly helpful as an information, but it's progress.

Toph punches my shoulder. "Don't be such a sourpuss, Fireflake!"

 _Give me a reason not to be!_

I reach behind me. My plan requires some stretching, but then my fingers clasp around the pillow on the lower bunk. I bury my face in it and scream until my vocal chords fail and my mind is wiped blank.

Stress relief at its finest.

"Better now?" Sokka asks.

"Yeah." I nod and prepare to get out of my seat. "I'll fetch a cup of water if you don't mind."

"I'll do it," Aang interrupts however and airbends himself to his feet, then disappears into the washroom. Before long, I can enjoy the sweet sensation of cold water soothing a raw throat.

"Thanks, Aang." I shake my head wearily. "Sorry for stirring up such a drama."

"It's okay," Aang says and returns to his own seat, then Toph decides to occupy my attention with an "Impressive scream, Fireflake."

I pretend she was serious and mumble "Airbender staple, I guess...", then wave at Sokka. "Please, go on."

He nods. "We'll stay another hour or so to stock up on supplies. We also don't want to look hasty."

"Wait a second, Sokka," Aang chips in. "We just replenished our supplies on Cinder Island."

"And picked up an extra mouth to feed."

"I resent that statement." I cross my arms. And get skillfully ignored.

Aang shakes his head. "Appa can't carry this much weight for so long. We'll make better time if we make more stops for supplies."

Sokka wrinkles his nose and directs his attention back at his Master Schedule. "Fine."

"How far will we get with our current stock?" Katara asks and Sokka hovers his finger above his scroll.

"The Jang Hui river. If we save some vegetables for Aang, we might be able to fish." He wrinkles his nose unhappily. "Or we'll have to go hungry for a day."

"Or we stock up on supplies in Jang Hui Village," I suggest, drawing three pairs of eyes. "What? Sokka, don't you have a map?"

Sokka starts rummaging through his backpack and procures a piece of parchment with an ominous yellow tint. Parchment. Yellowed.

My suspicions are confirmed when he rolls it out on the table. This thing must be a thousand years old!

"Don't you have anything more... up-to-date?"

"Nope," Sokka deadpans. "The Fire Nation is a little stingy with maps."

"Not around here. And I think it would be a worthwhile investment if you plan on getting anywhere. But anyway..." I point at an archipelago in the east, at an island which is cut in halves by a sliver of water. "This is the Kagio Channel. And over here..." I trace a line across the map with my finger, spanning two small islands to the next bigger one with another stripe of water. "This is the Jang Hui river. See this bend where the river broadens? A village is located there, and a smelting plant. We should make this a stop."

"Right..." Sokka complains. "Just wreak havoc on my schedule."

"It's not my fault you used this ancient antiquity to plan our route. Or that no one's telling me what's going on. I could have helped you with this from the beginning."

Sokka scowls, but he doesn't say anything. I sigh and roll up the map. Parchment. Agni. "So much for this. Next chance we get, somebody's gonna buy an atlas. From paper." I return the map to Sokka, but I can't resist tapping him on the head with it beforehand. The scowl deepens.

And here I thought these people were smart...

"Uh, Kami?" Aang tentatively speaks up. "We don't have the money to buy an atlas."

"Oh the High Dragons have mercy..." I raise my eyes to the heavens. "Alright. Then let's see how far we'll get with your map. There is only so much space for geography in my brain, unfortunately." I shake my head at another unpleasant thought just crossing my mind: "Where did you get the money anyway?"

I direct the question at Sokka, but he's still stewing. "We captured a Fire Nation ship," he explains curtly, leaving me to fill the blanks by myself. I assume the ship transported money. Or... I swallow hard. Or the crew did...

"What happened to the people on the ship?"

Sokka waves dismissively, the seriousness of the question snapping him out of his passive-aggressive anger. "Don't worry, they're alive. They were such sloth snails that nobody got hurt, and we simply dumped them on the nearest beach."

And the ache is back, though it's centered around my stomach this time. There is still a lot of danger to a ship's crew on an unknown beach. Wild animals, thirst... Better not ask whether the team made sure that my compatriots weren't in any danger of dying.

I throw the pillow away and stand up. "Excuse me for a minute... I need some air."

A couple apprehensive looks are shared, but nobody tries to stop me. At least until Toph warns, "Our friendly Featherdragon is back."

By the time the words properly registered, I can hear it too: the sound of footsteps on the stairs. I open the door and sure enough, Judai is here. The grin on his face brightens my mood instantly.

"Hey, you're back!"

"Sure I'm back! You're not getting rid of me that easily."

"So, what happened?" A step to the side to let Judai in, then the door snaps shut. "Sora was right, wasn't he?"

"'Fraid so. I see you found your tie. I gotta say though, I liked you better when your hair was loose."

Um... Okay? "It makes me look even more like a colonial."

Judai lifts his hands and shrugs. "Well, I'm not gonna tell you how to wear your hair."

He pushes past me and faces the table, leaving me with a good view of his back. I put a fist on my hip. "For the record, I like you better with loose hair, too."

And what in the name of Agni made me feel compelled to say that?

Judai sends me a glance over his shoulder. "You don't even know what I look like when I'm not a mess," he points out, striking me speechless. He got me there.

"Ouch," Toph comments, but she doesn't sound particularly disapproving.

"Come on, fire boy," Sokka joins in the fun. "You look fine."

Judai sighs, shoulders sagging, and joins my... companions, I guess. Maybe 'friends' is stretching it after all.

"So, and what are you guys up to?"

"Adjusting our schedule," Aang replies truthfully while I walk over to stand next to Judai. He seems in no hurry to sit, only crosses his arms and pulls a face.

"Yeah, I suppose a rescue wasn't in it. But can I have a minute anyway?"

"Is something wrong?" Katara asks, concern painting her voice. Judai's posture relaxes, but his expression is wry.

"Matter of perspective, I guess," he says and raises his hands to his chest. Oh, I think... Yup, he's bowing. And about time, too. "I apologize for referring to the people of the Water Tribe as snow savages." He straightens, giving a good view of the doubt written all across his face. "I never really thought of it as a slur, to be honest."

"Tell me about it..." I mutter under my breath and finally manage to tear my gaze away from Judai. Katara has a relaxed smile on her lips. Sokka seems more skeptical, and I can't shake the feeling he heard what I said.

"Yeah, you're not the first one to run into that trap." Called it.

I press my lips together and examine my toenails. I think they can use a trim?

"Well, that's a relief," Judai remarks dryly, and maybe, in a way, it's true. What was that with safety in numbers? Judai slipping up does show that my slipping up is only partially my fault. You simply can't know what you don't know.

Not that it makes such comments any less hurtful.

"Hey, regular mortal to Kami! Do I need to get a messenger hawk?"

"Hmm? What?"

Judai shakes his head with a soft groan. "Keep hunching over like that and you'll look like an old granny in no time." Without giving me a chance to piece an adequate retort together, Judai switches back to cheerful and grabs my hand. "Speaking of which, I'd like you to meet somebody. That is, if I can borrow you for a few minutes?"

"Have fun," Sokka sends us off and I allow Judai to drag me down into the taproom. Some kids are still around, chatting, drinking tea or sleeping on the tables. Guard Hina is talking to the innkeepers. The only new arrival, whose table Judai is heading for, is a lady who seems about ten years too young to be the grandmother of a fifteen-year-old, but I don't doubt her identity for a second.

"Grandma!" Judai calls, and the woman stands up to welcome us. Aaaand yes, if that lady is not related to Judai, I don't know who is. Black hair streaked with gray, done up in a neat topknot, kind gray eyes and laugh lines gracing the corners of her mouth. There is a certain slyness to her smile when she greets us.

"Honey, the time has passed when you courted a lady by hauling her after you."

"Grandma, knock it off!"

 _You tell her, Ju._ Agni, isn't it enough that Sokka and Toph keep teasing us? She's right though, Judai _could_ have let go of my hand long before running into this situation.

The woman turns her smile at me. "Hello, child."

"Ma'am," I answer and bow, expecting Judai to take it from there and introduce us. He doesn't, which throws me off. Protocol, anyone?

Judai's grandmother apparently senses my disorientation and laughs. "Trust my grandson to cause confusion."

"What's me to do with this?!"

"You know what you've to do with this."

Judai huffs and crosses his arms. What's his deal?

"You must forgive my grandson, he's a little peculiar with introductions."

"Gee, thanks gran."

Wow, this is almost as intense to watch as an Agni Kai. Maybe I should do something? We're not getting anywhere like this. "So, is this the part where I say my name?"

The woman laughs. "Very well. What may this old hag call you, young lady?"

"Um..." Agni help me, I'm caught in a nerve-wrecking comedian crossfire. I don't know, aren't old people supposed to be all wise and stern? "My name is Kamina, but you're not an old hag, ma'am..."

She laughs. Again. "Nice to meet you, Kamina. Please call me Fen."

Fen? Not a name I would choose for a child, but... yeah, why not. "Okay... Fen. Pleased to make your acquaintance."

"No need to be so formal, my dear."

"Yeah, my ears are starting to bleed over here." And Judai is back in the conversation, too. He places a hand on my arm and smiles encouragingly. "Relax, it's just my grandma. She's not gonna eat you."

I guess that's true. Okay Kami, breathe... "I'm sorry. Thanks, Ju. But would you be so kind and explain to me what your problem is? This would all have been significantly less awkward if you just did your job."

Judai wrinkles his nose. "My job is not to suggest that you're too dumb to introduce yourself."

I blink once. I blink twice. I slap my forehead. "Are you kidding me?!"

Judai does not deign me an answer, but at least the nervousness has been blown away. The sheer absurdity... But it does explain his walking out on me after I told Lori his name.

"I agree with your grandma here: You are one weird person, buddy. It's just etiquette, nothing patronizing about it."

"Well, that's your opinion."

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. I let Judai have the last word and shrug. Everyone has a personal weirdness, and if that's his... Well, I've seen worse.

"Anyway, is there some greater purpose behind your dragging me around?"

Now it's Judai's turn to shrug. "I figured that introducing the girl who saved me from slavery to my grandma _is_ a great purpose."

"But I didn't..." I trail off and let my shoulders droop. It's no use. No matter how often I repeat that the whole thing is mostly on the Avatar's gang, it's my face that'll stick. "Oh, forget it."

"Hardly."

I realize only _after_ my reflexes kicked in that Judai tried to underline his statement by poking my breastbone. And I'm every bit as shocked as he is – my body is capable of some serious speediness when it comes to swatting hands away.

"Uh..." Face burning, I hastily hide my arm behind my back in a ludicrous attempt to undo the damage. But my chest is off-limits, decent and indecent zones alike. "Sorry, but... You're not the only one who'd rather not be touched. Okay?"

Judai himself has been frozen with his arm close to the chest while I was talking, but he finally loosens somewhat and nods solemnly. His grandmother chooses the moment to intervene, and a pang of jealousy rushes through me when Judai is granted an embrace to hide away in. I could use a hug for myself just about now, but as it is, I'm left to pondering my reaction.

I thought I had it under control. Hide did a lot of prodding, and I simply let it happen. One day and a half away from home, and I'm already changing. Makes me wonder what sort of me is standing at the end of the road.

A warm hand, a warm smile. Turtle whiskers, I need to stop spacing out in the middle of things. Gratefully, I wrap my arms around Judai's neck and relax, let myself fall.

I'm changing, but no matter what, I'll make sure that it's a change for the better. And I can't wait to see it.

* * *

 ***sigh* Cheesy much?**

 **Sooo, since the last update, I've gotten two guest reviews, and one of them made the delete button look more tempting than ever. But okay, it's only half as offensive as it looks at first glance. Made me google the name Kamina, for the lols, and I found this one anime called Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann with a character named Kamina. Oh yeah, it's a he.  
I also searched the ATLA fandom for characters named Kami, without the -na. And lo and behold, I found an abadoned fic from 2013/14 with an OC main character - a Fire Nation airbender. The fic is titled "The Lost Air Nomad: Water", and of course I dived right in. Found it a little underwhelming, though that could be just me.  
So Kamina is not the most original name out there. _I don't care._ I'm not going to rename her Shiyumakila, because I don't want my readers to look up the spelling every five seconds. That's not the point of a name. A name should be easy to memorize, easy to pronounce, it should fit the universe, and maybe, just maybe, be meaningful. On that note, I'm very happy with my name choice, thank you very much.**

 **From the other guest review I'm catching I-think-I-know-you vibes, but I admit with much chagrin that I can only narrow it down to two candidates instead of one. Thanks anyway, and as you can see, we're not rid of Judai just yet. ;)**


	35. I'll Be A Hero!

**Who missed me? Well, I know at least one person who's still waiting for a PM from me. :/**

 **I was very busy with the Probending Circuit. That's a writing competition for Avatar, and one can rack up bonus points with writing stuff outside the competition prompts. I already wrote a fluffy little Kainora AU. And I'm going to submit this chapter too, apologies for possible inconveniences.**

 **Team: Laogai Lion Vultures/firebender**

 **Equipment: Weights**

 **Word count: 2,928 (excluding A/N)**

 **There is a bonus for using your own element in the text. Kinda ironic that it showed up AFTER the point where firebending turned into a mostly non-issue. I would have gotten at least twenty bonus points. Kami spans a lot, then there's Mimi, then Aang, then Judai. So many people with firebending issues! Yeah, well, maybe this chapter still counts.**

* * *

While it's nice to see Judai happily chatting away with his grandmother, I quickly start to feel like a third wheel. I hear names I can't place, terms out of context, an apparent in-joke that goes right over my head. If I just up and left, how long until they'd notice?

I'm actually relieved when the rest of the gang appears, I almost fall over myself getting out of my chair.

"Hey guys!"

Sokka is carrying his backpack again. And I'm not the only one to notice: "You look ready to leave," Judai remarks.

"We'll check in with the guards first, to make sure we're not needed anymore. But we have a schedule to keep."

"And so do we," Fen cuts in. She, too, gets up and bows. "Thank you for returning my grandson safely to my side."

That's where Aang takes over. He returns the bow and flashes a beaming smile. "No need to thank us. We did what everybody would have done."

"Except for the slavers," Judai bitterly objects, and his grandmother squeezes his hand. Pretty much my first inclination, too, but... I kinda surplus the requirement now.

I shake my head. Act now, feel useless later. "Please, Ju. I know this won't go away overnight, but you need to snap out of it. For your own sake. If you let the what-ifs infect your mind, it'll ruin you."

"Cheerful," Toph comments from the side. "You really have a way with words, Fireflake."

The statement is definitely worth an eye-roll, but okay. I admit it's not the most encouraging thing I've ever said.

"Cheerful indeed," Judai sighs. "But you're right. I should forget this whole mess as soon as possible."

Not the way I'd put it, but I said enough. No need to point out that the way such incidences shape us is irreversible. He'll get over it eventually, but he'll never be the same.

Judai finally climbs to his feet. The smile on his lips is a forced one, but a smile nonetheless. I wonder what kind of person I missed out on.

"Looks like we're all better be going, huh? I can't wait to see my room again."

 _My room..._ Agni, I left it in a mess. I wonder if my mum... No, no, stop it! I'll see them again, no worries. But they're worried. If I could just let them know... Wait, I can! _I can!_

"Uh, Kami?" Judai pipes up, sounding very skeptic indeed. "Are you okay? You seem a little..."

"Loopy?"

"...Out of sorts."

I nearly laugh out loud, but that would only serve to underscore my new status. "Yeah, I guess grinning like an idiot during a farewell is not exactly the way to go. Nah, I just remembered something I should do before we leave. Don't worry, I won't be long."

The last part is addressed at Sokka, who looks curious. "And what would that be?"

"Write a letter to my family. It's the first time I'm out like this, and you know how parents can be. I think they could use word that I'm okay."

"You should do that." Fen's melancholic voice compels me to turn forward again. "Parents always worry about their children, even if they know where they are. You never know what might happen to them."

She ruffles Judai's hair, and I half expect him to object to this embarrassing treatment. What I don't expect him to do is just submit. However, Toph has something to say.

"Parents also need to learn to let their children go. They can't worry about them forever."

"Very true, young lady. But they worry anyway. It's their job."

Judging from Toph's tension, the conversation has struck a nerve. The rest of the gang seems concerned, too. And yet another mystery to add to my list...

"Anyway..." Judai cuts through the heavy atmosphere. "Grandma, if you would... Thank you." Obligatory ruffle repelling – check. "Alright, I'm not sure what's going on here, but it's probably none of my business. And speaking of business..." He gestures at the door, and I sigh. As much as I wish to stave off this moment, I can't keep him forever.

"So this is goodbye?"

"You act like it's the end of the world."

 _It certainly feels like it._ But I force a smile. I've burdened Judai with too much already. Time to woman up and let go. But I guess a little hug is still in the cards.

"Take care."

"You too. Write me?"

"I thought you hate reading?"

"I don't _hate_ it. But I'm all for inventing long-distance speakers."

I chuckle in spite of myself. "You're impossible."

"I like the idea," Sokka chips in. "Imagine you have a box, and you talk into it, and someone else with the same box can hear it."

"Sora, boxes don't work that way," Katara points out.

"Let him dream, Sweetness."

Even Aang laughs. "If anyone can make boxes talk, it's Sora."

"Well then," I snicker. People and their overactive imagination... "You boys make boxes talk. I'll write letters in the meantime."

The rest happens in a daze. Aang bows, Sokka grins, Toph punches, Katara advises. They didn't bond with Judai the way I did. Though something's telling me he and Sokka could be best bros if they tried. Best bros building babbling boxes. Bah...

A last bow at Fen, and then my new friend is leaving for good. I resist the urge to follow them outside and drop into the nearest chair instead. Whatever semblance of normalcy I had until now... it's gone. And with the letter to my family, it feels like cutting another tie.

 _I'm fine. The next time you see my face, it'll probably be on a wanted poster. But don't worry. I'm fine._

I can't even convince myself. How do I even _begin_ to explain this mess?

"I'm afraid we do need the room still. Well, at least I do. Sokka, can you spare some paper and ink? I won't write anything incriminating, promise."

Sokka nods and shrugs off his backpack. Shortly after, I'm armed with a brush, inkstone, inkstick and a piece of parchment plus some string. Not exactly paper, but well, never look a gift ostrich horse in the mouth.

"Thanks. If you're looking for me, I'll be upstairs."

"And if we aren't looking for you?" Toph retorts, and I almost smile.

"I'll be there anyway."

On the way up, my head is already busy trying to come up with things to say. But I can't seem to find anything. By the time the parchment is flattened on the table and the ink mixed, I realized there is nothing _right_ to say. Only the least _wrong_.

With a sigh, I dip the brush into the ink start writing.

 _Dear Mum and Dad, hey Mimi,_

 _I hope this letter finds you well. Or at least as well as can be._

 _There is not much I can say, I'm not entirely sure what's happening myself. But I want you to know that I'm okay. This letter is from Rubona, a village at the banks of the Kagio Channel, but please don't come looking for me. I'll be gone an hour from now. I'm traveling with a group of four other teens. One of them can help me with my problem, as unbelievable as it seems. I can't tell when I'll be back, but I will. In the meantime, I wish for you to carry on without worrying about me. And whatever happens, whatever you may hear about your rogue daughter and big sister, whatever I might end up doing... I love you. I love you all so much._

It's barely readable. My hand is trembling, the ink is smudged, the parchment tear-stained. What in the name of everything right and just _am I doing?_ I'm practically warning my family about my turning traitor, as if it were a given. I should paint over the words. It would be so easy.

But they deserve this information. If it happens, I don't want them to hear it from someone else.

Still... What if my parents disown me? They wouldn't. Right? What would I do if I learned that Mimi joined forces with the Avatar?

 _We busted a slave ring yesterday. I finally got a chance to put my abilities to good use. Don't worry, no one saw it. I can hardly believe I could be a hero, but I did it. I even made a friend._

I'm scared. But I can't write that down. I put the brush aside and bury my face in my hands, not even trying to control the sobs. I have no idea what I would do if I learned that Mimi was a traitor. I'd deny it so hard, but what if the evidence practically screamed into my face? Deny it even harder?

I don't want to think about it.

It takes a while for me to calm down. How much of the allotted time did I spend crying my eyes out? I bet the others are waiting impatiently.

I sign the letter, then roll up the parchment and tie it with the string. Such a hassle, and for what? Protecting the freaking _Avatar!_ And learning how to airbend properly... I guess I should be thankful. In a way, protecting the Avatar also means protecting myself. And, by extension, my family. Weird how everything loops back on itself.

Anyway, a trip to the washroom is in order. Splashing some water on my face should freshen me up a little...

If only I got that far. I almost jump through the roof when I get up and spot Aang meditating on the bed Judai and me used last night.

"Whoa! What are you doing here?!"

The little Avatar's eyes slowly blink open. I think... I think he was pretty far away with his senses. Maybe even on purpose?

Aang relaxes his posture, slouching and leaning back on his hands. "I thought you may want some company."

"Where are the others?" I ask, avoiding the implied question. Some company would be nice indeed, but the Avatar of all people?

"They went ahead to the guard station. Katara said she wants to check on the kids, Sokka wants to be efficient, and Toph has had enough of the wooden floor."

"Makes sense." I perch on the edge of the bed, balancing precariously in an attempt to sit as far away from Aang as possible. If he notices, he doesn't let it show. "So... Now that's only the two of us, I have a few questions."

"Ask away."

"So, first off: What are airbenders capable of? Yesterday, it hit me that every living creature breathes air. Does that mean we can... hypothetically speaking..."

"Yes." Aang shifts uncomfortably. He doesn't like the question at all. "We can do that. But we don't. It's unnatural and cruel. And you must promise me to never use your airbending for that purpose."

I don't think I've seen him so dead serious before. I turn away, get annoyed, and force myself to hold Aang's gaze. "I promise. I never intended to do it anyway. I was just wondering how it's possible that the Air Nomads were wiped out when they have such a power at their disposal."

Aang's face falls and he looks away. "Chances are it didn't cross their minds. Certainly never crossed mine. And even if it did, I don't think they would have used it."

"Why not?"

"Because the Air Nomads believe that all life is sacred and..."

"And you don't simply take it away." I hug my knees to my chest. That seems familiar. "I believe that too. Granted, not to the extend that I would go vegetarian, but... Life is a precious gift. Just killing people seems so... wrong."

Aang nods. "I figured as much."

I raise a brow. What gave him that idea? Me Fire Nation? Militaristic country? "What do you mean?"

"I've been thinking... You don't know of any other airbenders, right? So what generation are you? Third, fourth?"

"My great-great-grandfather was an Air Nomad, so..." I do a quick calculation. "Fifth generation. No airbending powers in three generations. That's quite a jump, isn't it?"

Aang nods again. "You don't happen to be an autumn child?"

"I am. My birthday is the twenty-third of Tenthmonth." I'm not surprised he figured that out. Most benders are born during the season that corresponds with their element. Waterbenders in winter, earthbenders in spring, firebenders in summer... and airbenders in autumn. Nobody knows exactly why that is, but it's probably got to do with spiritual shenanigans.

I wonder idly if Judai is a summer child. I know Mimi is. We freed roughly twenty firebenders... Kinda saddening to think one of them might have spent their birthday hurt and alone in a cave.

"For the record though, my mum's an autumn child too. And she can't airbend."

Aang snickers. "I'm not saying that's all it needs. It just makes sense. I think you can airbend because you have the heart of an Air Nomad. And no, don't snap!"

He holds up a hand all panicky while I draw breath for... a temper tantrum, I guess. Me, an Air Nomad at heart? But Aang's reaction causes said breath to catch in my throat. "I'm Fire Nation, thank you very much," I say without snapping, and Aang knits his brows.

"Let me rephrase that: You're not an Air Nomad, but you have the spirit of one. That doesn't mean you're not Fire Nation. You can be both! You're not the first one with mixed ancestry, you know?"

"Maybe not, but this isn't _me_ , Aang!" Agni, how blinded by naivety can an Avatar be?! "This world doesn't allow me to exist. We're at war. I can't simply be _both_."

"You can! But you need to stop convincing yourself you can't!"

Great, now I got him riled up. And what's he saying, I need to stop? "Don't make me laugh. You have no idea what I've been through because of this curse! I've been shunned, looked down upon, misused as a punching bag, and overall treated like an infectious disease. Every day I woke up, and I was scared . Scared of going to school, scared someone might find out. Blazes, I'm so scared of waking up that I can't even sleep! Because of something that is not my fault! What are you thinking, _I can be both?!_ "

My own ears hurt from the sound of my voice, but Aang... actually seems calmer. Dang it, _I_ feel calmer! Those words were _so_ overdue. Venting them in front of Aang may not have been the smartest thing to do, but what's done is done. And I'm kind of okay with it.

Aang sighs and draws up his knees. "You know what happened when I found out about being the Avatar?"

My first inclination is huffing _You were probably worshipped, your lucky Avatariness!_ , but the whole situation says otherwise. "Not what I'm expecting, I assume."

Aang shakes his head dejectedly. "I was shunned, too. So to speak. Everyone started treating me differently, like something... untouchable. No one wanted to play with me, saying I had an unfair advantage because I'm the Avatar. And then everyone started expecting me to save the world. I wasn't allowed any free time, because someone always wanted something from me. Monk Gyatso... my father, if you want, he tried to keep me away from it, so the head monk decided to send me away. I was so upset, I needed to get away from it all. And then..." He trails off. I wait for him to calm down, whatever he's trying to tell me, it's eating at him. Finally, he breathes deeply and stretches his legs.

"I'm here now because Appa and me were caught in a storm out at sea. We almost died, and I went into the Avatar State to keep us from drowning. It sealed us inside an iceberg, until Katara and Sokka broke it. I wasn't there when my people were attacked... And now everyone's expecting me to end this war. I try not to think about it too much, because I know I'd go crazy if I did."

Hug him or run away as far as I can? That's the question. Hmm, never seen such an interesting wall before.

"'I'd go crazy if I did'... Tell me about it..." I sigh. "Thank you for sharing. And... I'm sorry I yelled."

"That's okay. So long as it makes you feel better. Besides..." A small grin lightens up Aang's features. "It was a very Fire Nation-y thing to do. I'm not comfortable with being a firebender myself, so let's help each other out. Deal?"

He lifts a hand and a smile tugs at my lips. The smack of the high-five cuts through the tension in the air, dispersing it. "Deal!"

It's a good feeling. Aang is offering me a place I can truly be myself. And yet, when I go to pick up the letter to my family, it seems too heavy. I got carried away by the moment. We're only pushing the problem aside, we're not solving it. We had a breakthrough when Aang promised to protect the Fire Nation from the wrath of the other nations, but will that be enough?

Only one way to find out. With new determination, I unroll the parchment one last time, take Sokka's brush and dip it into the drying ink.

 _PS: I'll learn the truth. Just you wait. This airbender is going to be a hero._


End file.
